


hva kjærlighet er (what love is)

by fauu_stine, parallelcurtains



Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: (not between them of course), Alternate Universe - Robots & Androids, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cheating, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Future Fic, Human!Even, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Mutual Pining, Sexual Tension, Slight Violence, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Verbal Abuse, robot!Isak
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:01:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 116,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24456376
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fauu_stine/pseuds/fauu_stine, https://archiveofourown.org/users/parallelcurtains/pseuds/parallelcurtains
Summary: As a last resort to save their engagement, Sonja decides to get a robot to do the chores for Even and her, so they can spend the little free time they have together. However, the plan backfires when Even starts to spend more time with "Adrian 2121" than with his fiancée, intrigued by the robot's beauty and innocence.*"A robot?" Even exclaims, stunned."Even, it's perfect," Sonja urges him. "The time we used to spend cleaning up or doing paperwork, we can spend it together.""It doesn't feel right to use someone else to-""Someone else?" She snorts. "It's not a person, Even, don't be absurd! It's a thing. It's a machine. Do you feel bad when you use your computer? Then it's the same thing. We are not taking advantage of it, that's its very purpose!"- AU inspired by Tarjei's short movie "On/Off".
Relationships: Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen, Even Bech Næsheim/Sonja (SKAM)
Comments: 409
Kudos: 978





	1. mitt første minne (my first memory)

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [hva kjærlighet er (что есть любовь)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25488160) by [lavikka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavikka/pseuds/lavikka)



> After watching Tarjei's short movie "On/Off" that is part of the Tokyo Lift-Off Film Festival (you can watch it [here](https://vimeo.com/ondemand/tokyopreview1/)), we instantly got inspired to make our own version of it for Isak and Even... So, here it goes!  
> We had a lot of fun, brainstorming, developing ideas and writing. We're super hyped about this, to be honest! <3
> 
> We hope you'll enjoy the first part! Let us know what you think!  
> xx

_Mitt aller beste gjemmested_

_Min hemmeligste hemmelighet_

_Mitt første minne hvis jeg husker det_

_Du kan få vite det_

_Du kan få vite alt om min pubertet_

_Ting bare mine vegger vet_

_Alle jeg har ligget med_

_Du kan få vite det_

_For jeg har valgt deg nå_

_Så ta det med ro_

_Du trenger ikke fylle noen andres sko_

_Men du må la meg forstå det selv_

_La meg tro_

_At det finnes ingen andre nå enn oss to_

_For jeg prøver å lære meg hva kjærlighet er_

_Så gi meg rom så jeg tør å være nær_

_Så gi meg rom så jeg tør å være nær_

(No. 4 - Hva kjærlighet er)

  
  


If Even is being honest with himself, really, it's his own fault. But the thing is, Sonja and him have been engaged for years now, and, to him, it has become more like a permanent state than a transition towards something more. Sonja, of course, didn't see it that way, and objectively speaking he knows she's right. People get engaged, and then they get married. That's how it has always worked.

That's why it shouldn't have come as much of a surprise for him when one day Sonja made them sit down to talk about planning their wedding, and yet, he almost choked on his own water when he heard her use the words "our" and "marriage" together.

"Even," Sonja said with a look of reprimand, "why are you acting like I'm trying to trap you. You asked me to marry you, remember?"

As Even remembers it, it was more like Sonja leaving clues until she got tired of him ignoring them and then her ending up confronting him directly, which resulted in him panicking and asking her if she wanted them to get married. In retrospect, Even wasn't even sure it was something he had meant to ask at all.

But there were they.

Or more like, there was Sonja still very much interested while Even had more doubts than ever about his own feelings, wants, and needs. Doubts he couldn't bring himself to voice.

Which is why he made the mistake of telling her, "I do want to marry you,  _ eventually _ . But is it really a good idea when we can't even clear enough time for us to see each other more than the ten minutes we get before going to bed and falling asleep?"

At least it wasn't a complete lie. Of course, it wasn't the real reason why Even didn't feel like marrying Sonja anymore, but it still was a valid objection. They were both very busy with work: him as a film director, working on set sometimes 14 hours a day - if not more, and Sonja as a gynecologist at the hospital, working one shift after another, and even when she was home, she was on duty half the time, ready to go back at any moment - babies soon to be born didn't wait. Sometimes they would spend days without running into each other.

(And the worst thing was how Even didn't really mind, but of course, he wasn't about to tell her.)

"I see your point," Sonja said, the way she always does when she doesn't want to admit he's right. "I will think of something, okay?" She added before taking his hand into hers and smiling at him.

Sonja had looked so determined then. He should have known she would, indeed, think of something.

Which finally brings them to the current situation, to the result of his own mistake. Apparently, Sonja's  _ something  _ is-

" _ A robot? _ " Even exclaims, stunned. 

He knows it has become a normal thing, owning a robot that would keep your house clean, pay your bills, or cook your favorite dinner. Some of the latest robots were so efficient that they could even take care of almost all of their owner's work tasks: send emails, make calls, make researches, write reports, and so on. But just because society has normalized it, doesn't mean Even likes the idea. He can wash his own underwear, thank you very much. And if he forgets, then it's his own fault. He's not going to make it somebody else's responsibility, even if it's a robot programmed to do so.

"Even, it's perfect," Sonja urges him. "The time we used to spend cleaning up or doing paperwork, we can spend it together."

"It doesn't feel right to use someone else to-"

"Someone else?" She snorts. "It's not a person, Even, don't be absurd! It's a thing. It's a machine. Do you feel bad when you  _ use _ your computer? Then it's the same thing. We are not taking advantage of it, that's its very purpose!"

Even quickly realizes it's a lost cause. Once Sonja has made a decision, it's impossible to make her change her mind. 

"So are you on board with this?" She asks although it's clear she won't take no for an answer. She looks and sounds very much annoyed as if Even is being unreasonable and childish. Sadly, Even is used to it.

He sighs, resigned, "yes, fine. Whatever you want."

Sonja seems satisfied enough by his answer, judging by her wide and contented smile, and she stands up. He's expecting her to walk away now that she got what she wanted, but instead, she leans over him and pecks him on the lips. 

"Alright then, let's go," she says, stepping back from him.

"What?" He frowns.

"What's the point of waiting? We are both finally available. I made researches. I know what we need. Let's go buy it now," she presses him, already reaching for her jacket and grabbing her car keys. "Come on, Even, hurry up!"

Even lets out one last sigh before standing up, too, and follows her into the doorway.

Really, it's his own fault.

*

Even isn't sure what he was expecting but it wasn't that. It wasn't  _ him _ . 

He tries to remind himself of Sonja's words, of her indisputable reasoning, but all he can think about is how this robot looks nothing like his computer. 

This robot is objectively the most beautiful creature he has ever laid his eyes upon. 

He's standing in front of them but his eyes are closed, a clear indication that he's still... off. And it's so strange to think of him as a machine that you can turn on and off at will, because if he didn't know better, Even would swear he's human. It's not even the first time he sees one of them, but the robots he's used to on set are old versions, and, although humanoid-like, from a single glance he could always tell what they really were. This one, though, has the perfect appearance of a human being. 

_ He's perfect. _

Even notices the smooth and flawless texture of his skin, covered here and there by blond hair and birthmarks. He can see his prominent veins under his skin, running along his arms and his hands, giving the illusion of real blood flowing through his body. As Even's eyes travel north, he slowly discovers the boy's naked neck and his Adam's apple, the shadow of a stubble on his jaw and the natural dimple in his chin. Then, he lingers on the delicate shape of his turned-up nose, on his cheekbones, slightly flushed like a shy blush, and on his eyebrows, the form of them adding a nice touch of cheekiness to his features. It's on his mouth that Even's attention gets caught a bit longer though, on how his thin lips arch like a Cupid's bow, enchanting and tempting, and on the small mole laid on the left corner of his lower lip, like an invitation to get closer. To end it all, his face is crowned with golden locks, light curls falling down on his forehead that Even is dying to touch, to feel if they are as soft as they look.

Even's genuinely mesmerized. And very much confused, because surely he isn't supposed to be in such awe over a robot. Right?

"Alright, I think I got it," Sonja says, pulling him out of his reverie, and she closes the operating manual she's been reading for a few minutes now. "I just need to click here…" She mumbles to herself as she takes a step towards the robot and presses her forefinger against his temple.

And by the second, Even sees the robot jolt awake.

***

When his gears start to work and his software boots, he quickly blinks several times to adjust his visuals to the brightness he finds himself in. Eventually, everything is razor-sharp and he scans his surroundings, taking in every little detail.

He is standing in the living room of a modern apartment, probably somewhere in the north of Oslo, judging by what he can see outside the window. The room is reasonably sized and sparsely furnished, the dominant colors are white and grey. The TV is almost as big as the sofa that can easily fit a family of four or five. There's also a fireplace that hasn't been used in forever, he notices.

After his scan, his eyes take in the humans standing in front of them. They are a female and a male human, in their mid-twenties. Both are tall, blonde, and pretty according to human standards.

"Good day," he says after a second. "I'm Adrian 2121. How may I be of service?"

The male human stares at him with his mouth slightly ajar while the female looks just past him, nodding. "Yeah, great… how about you start with cleaning the living room? And I mean, really clean it, including dusting the shelves and mopping the floor."

He is about to affirm when the male human closes and opens his mouth, and then speaks quietly, his eyes still fixed on him: "No, wait - but what's your name? Like… that's just a serial number! What's your name?"

"I'm sorry, sir," he says, his software trying to process the question. "I don't understand. Your question couldn't be processed. I'm very sorry to disappoint, sir."

The female rolls her eyes, grabbing the male's hand. "Even, what the fuck? Robots don't have names. Just let it do its work… and we can use this free time to spend some time together. That was the plan, wasn't it?"

Finally, the male turns his gaze away to look at the female. There is a frown on his face, as he replies: "Don't call him  _ it _ , Son. You can't just… that's so disrespectful. Also, he doesn't know where anything is, we can't just leave him here. Someone has to show him where the supplies are and… I don't know, how to… and where he can rest and all that."

"Even, it's a robot! It doesn't need to rest," the female retorts, her voice slightly raised. It is anger that he can hear in her voice, he realizes, and it makes him retreat a little, even though it was directed towards the male human and not him. But his software is programmed to react to anger with retreat and apologies. "We will plug it in tonight and then it's good to go again tomorrow… I can show it where the cleaning supplies are and then we can go. We can even go to the cinema if you want, okay?"

There is silence for several moments and he just stares at the wall, waiting for further instructions. It's the male human that speaks again eventually: "Fine. You go freshen up and I'll show him everything, alright? Then we can go out for some dinner and to the movies, after."

The male rests his lips on the female's forehead for a second and then she disappears further into the apartment, leaving them alone in the living room.

He waits for his instructions patiently.

But then the male human steps closer to him and extends his hand to him. "I'm Even, it's really nice to meet you… uhm, well  _ Adrian 2121 _ ." The male's face twists a little but his software can't process the meaning. "And that - that's Sonja, my fiancée. I'm sorry about her behavior, really."

"I don't understand, sir. There's nothing to apologize for," he says, looking at the male's hand in front of him. Again, he cannot process it. He knows that humans shake hands when they meet, sometimes they hug or exchange kisses on the cheeks, depending on culture and how close they are - but he isn't a human, so why does the male extend his hand to him? "If you show me the cleaning supplies, I'll get to work immediately, sir."

The human gulps noticeably and he stares at him again which makes him shift a little. Why is the male human staring at him like this? What can he possibly have done wrong already when he hasn't even started work yet? Is he being impolite? He checks back his answers and he can't find anything that contradicts his protocol. So, no, that can't be it.

"Don't call me  _ sir _ , please," the human suddenly states. "I'm Even, okay? Just call me Even, please. I don't want… it sounds weird…"

"Sir, I'm sorry, my protocol does not allow me to call you anything but  _ sir _ . I'm very sorry if that makes you feel uncomfortable. You can try to call the tech support, maybe they can add a code for it to my system."

Something clouds the blue eyes of the human for a second but before he is able to process it, the human clears his throat. "Uhm… okay, yeah. Come on then, I'll show you the cleaning supplies and give you a little tour of the apartment."

"Yes, sir. Thank you."

He follows the human to a little storage room where he produces a vacuum cleaner, bucket, several detergents for different surfaces, and rags. After, they move on to the guest bathroom where he can fill the bucket with water and add some detergent to it.

They leave the stuff in the living room where he is supposed to start his cleaning before the male human walks him through the apartment.

It isn't too big, so there should be no problem to keep it tidy and clean. There's the open kitchen with an adjacent dining room and a balcony, an office with two desks, a guest room, the main bathroom, and the master bedroom.

He doesn't get to see the latter because the female human steps out of the bedroom just as he and the male human stop in front of the door. She looks at him courtly, grabbing her bag from the dresser in the hallway. "When you're done with the living room, you can start with the kitchen. We'll be out for a while, so… You can also do the laundry and go grocery shopping? You can plug yourself in in the guest room if you're finished before we're back."

He nods, making a To-Do-List as she speaks. "Yes, Ma'am. That's no problem at all, I will get everything done."

She nods and moves past him, while the male human lingers. "Thank you," he eventually whispers and gives him a little smile. "Don't stress yourself too much, okay? It's okay if you don't get everything done. You can rest - uh,  _ plug yourself _ in by 8 pm, no matter what. It's your first day, there's no need to…" The female calls for the male human and he sighs. "You know… well, see you later. Or tomorrow."

"Yes, sir. Thank you," he says.

The male human slowly retreats and follows his fiancée out of the apartment.

After the door is closed behind them, he walks to the cleaning supplies in the living room and starts to get to work.


	2. så gi meg rom (so give me space)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even tries to communicate with Adrian 2121.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for last chapter's feedback! We are so happy you're liking it. 
> 
> For the record, we will try to update once a week, so probably every Friday or Saturday.
> 
> Don't hesitate to share your thoughts, it helps us writing too! 
> 
> Enjoy. <3

He has developed a routine in the four days he's been here already. Doing laundry in the morning, making dinner around midday to put it in the fridge for when his owners come back in the evening, then some cleaning, doing paperwork, taking the trash out, or going grocery shopping - whatever needs to be done.

He rarely sees his owners. They usually leave early, quickly gulping down the breakfast he has prepared for them. Sometimes they don't even find the time for that and just grab an apple or a banana on the go and he has to throw away whatever he has prepared for them on that day. It has happened twice already with the female human and once with the male human. He has set a reminder for the next time they leave without eating to ask them if he should stop preparing breakfast for them or if they would prefer a packed breakfast they can take with them. It isn't economical to prepare food just for it to end up in the trash, so they will have to find a better way to deal with this.

And they only return late in the evening when he's already plugged in. So, in the evening, he doesn't see them at all. He doesn't know when they come home if they eat together or do something else before they go to bed. But it is none of his concern. As long as the containers with their dinner are empty in the morning and there isn't more food that has gone to waste, everything should be to their satisfaction. 

It doesn't matter to him either way. If they are unsatisfied with his work, they will let him know or just return him straight away. Since nothing of the sort has happened, he is probably doing a good job or they don't care.

Currently, he's doing the dishes that have been piling up because he hasn't found the time to do them in the past two days. But since neither one of the humans has said anything to him in the morning, it apparently isn't a big deal for them.

Still, he knows he should do better.

But the male has told him to plug himself in no later than 7pm, so sometimes he has to delay certain tasks.

He has just put the first plates into the warm water when the lock of the apartment door clicks open. Quickly, he checks his databank for the time - it's only 6pm - before taking a tea towel to dry his hands.

Once they are dry, he throws the towel over his shoulder and walks into the hallway, ready to fight an intruder. But instead, he finds his male owner, slipping off his shoes and taking off his denim jacket before looking up at him with a smile.

"Sorry, sir," he says. "I thought someone was breaking in. Neither of you usually returns to the apartment this early."

The male nods while dropping his keys into a bowl on top of the drawer. "Yeah, sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. We couldn't continue filming because of the weather…"

"You can't scare me, sir. I was just getting ready to overwhelm an intruder… I added the fact that you might come home early when it's raining to my data now, so next time I will check the weather before activating the anti-burglar program. But it would also be advisable to install an alarm system. I can do that if you want me to, sir."

With that, he turns around to go back to the kitchen to continue with his task.

He has washed off about half of the dishes when he hears quite steps behind him. The male stops in the doorway and he can see him leaning against the frame through the reflection in the window. He can also see that the male's eyes are on him again, studying him from behind, scrutinizing his every move.

Carefully, he checks the dishes that he has already put away in the plate rack to dry. To him, they seems perfectly clean but maybe he is missing something? Maybe one of the plates has a stain or maybe there's some sauce clinging to one of the spoons? Or did one of the cups have a crack that he hasn't seen? It's really not possible because he's programmed to see every detail, no matter how tiny. But there has to be something or what other reason is there for the male human to stare at him?

Since his owner doesn't say anything, he continues with his work, focusing extra hard on every dirty spot on each plate and each cup. However, each and everyone is spotless when he pulls them out of the soapy water.

Maybe it's something in the flat? Or maybe he has shrunk one of the human's shirts while doing the laundry this morning?

He can't look past whatever mistake he has made - his very programming makes it impossible for him to continue before he hasn't found the source of his owner's dissatisfaction with his work -, so eventually, he turns around.

The male human is still leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed and his eyes looking at him unwaveringly. "I'm sorry for my mistakes, sir. Please tell me how I can be of better service to you," he says, stumbling over his words a little - which shouldn't be happening. But neither should mistakes and that's something that's obviously happening to him, too.

Maybe he has a defect? Maybe something went wrong while programming?

He carries out a software check while he keeps looking at the male human, waiting for a reply. But the male only looks at him in what seems to be confusion. "Mistakes?" He asks when he has composed himself. "What do you mean? I don't think you made any mistakes."

"Sir, are you sure? Because you keep looking at me and I was programmed to interpret this as dissatisfaction with my work. You have to tell me my mistakes, so I can do better, sir. I'm sorry if I'm not functioning to your satisfaction."

"Wow, wow… okay, stop," the male human interrupts. His hands up in the air, in a yielding gesture. His software can't process this. This human seems to be very different from the ones he has been programmed to deal with. Even though he is programmed to be able to function properly with all kinds of humans. Or he is faulty after all, even though the check-up came back clean a second ago. "Everything is fine, okay? I was just looking at you… no reason whatsoever. I'm sorry, don't worry about it, please. You didn't make any mistakes, everything is fine."

He nods and turns back towards the sink while saying: "I'm glad everything is to your satisfaction then, sir."

Instantly, he picks up his work again.

After he has placed three more plates on the rack, he can hear the human step closer. Then, he's next to him and takes the tea towel from his shoulder. He can't process why until the human starts to dry the washed dishes with the towel.

Again, he has to stop his task. So he is making mistakes and his owner is just incapable to say it. Instead, he has taken to show it to him.

"I'm sorry, sir," he repeats. "I'm trying to find out what I'm doing wrong. I've been running all my actions backwards three times now and I carried out a software check, as well. I can't find anything, though. I'm sorry I'm not doing satisfactory work, sir. I can try to reboot my system but I'm afraid I'm defective."

He turns towards the male human who is already looking at him, the tea towel forgotten in his hands and his lips moving without saying anything. Another reaction he cannot process correctly.

"I think it's best if you return me, sir. There's obviously an issue with my software or even hardware that I can't detect. I'm no use to you like this, sir."

***

Even feels utterly helpless. 

It's a feeling he thought he was used to, having often found himself in the position of a spectator in his own life - the presence of Adrian 2121 in his kitchen, by Sonja's initiative, is one of the many possible illustrations of it. And after all, he hadn't decided to become a director for nothing. Sure, he loves cinema and he loves making movies, but it has also been a way for him to regain some illusion of control.

_ This _ specific situation, though, leaves him even more powerless than he remembers ever being. Because he has to come to the unwanted conclusion that, no matter how human Adrian 2121 looks like, they both definitely belong to two different species; and no matter how eloquent he can be when he talks, they don't, in fact, speak the same language. They don't understand each other - at all. And what's even more heartbreaking for Even is that the harder he tries to make Adrian 2121 feel comfortable inside his home, the more confused and convinced he's doing something wrong the robot gets.

_ I'm afraid I'm defective.  _

_ I think it's best if you return me, sir _ .

They obviously couldn't be more different, and yet, Adrian 2121's words hit something personal inside him, for Even is more than familiar with the feeling of being inadequate,  _ broken _ . He remembers very well how, years ago when he was still a teenager, he had wondered if his parents wished they could return him to  _ whoever _ was responsible for his fucked up brain and get a more stable boy instead. Now, he's terrified at the idea that he's responsible for making Adrian 2121 feel the same way he did.

_ Feel _ . 

Maybe it's been Even's mistake from the start. Maybe, in some way, Sonja is right: Adrian 2121 is a machine, so of course, he doesn't feel anything. He doesn't feel inadequate or broken, he's only stating very technical facts he's been programmed to say in case his owners seem unhappy with his work. A robot doesn't need help from anyone and he doesn't need small talk to feel welcomed. Since he doesn't  _ feel  _ at all.

Even has been foolish for trying to communicate with him using gestures of compassion and kindness when clearly Adrian 2121 isn't meant to understand any of it. Because he hasn't been built for it. Because it isn't his purpose.

"I'm sorry," Even sighs, and drops the towel he's been holding in his hands all this time on the closest surface before stepping away from the counter, from Adrian 2121's workspace. "You did nothing wrong and you're not defective. I'm the one being… weird. You're doing a great job, okay?"

"It isn't your fault, sir," Adrian 2121 retorts, because  _ of course _ , he does. He's probably been programmed to never explicitly contradict his owners. "I will make sure to adjust my program so it fits your needs better."

"Adjust?"

Considering Adrian 2121's suggestion to be taken back to the store, which still feels like such an extreme proposition (what happens to AIs who really are defective? Even is too afraid to ask), he can't help but worry. He wonders what the robot would be capable of doing to himself in order to be "better". Even has no desire to come back home someday and find him in pieces in the middle of the living room, because he was desperately trying to find a problem within himself that doesn't even exist. 

"Yes, sir. I will collect more data on you so I can learn to adapt and properly meet your expectations," he clarifies.

Even has to bite his tongue to stop himself from objecting. He's dying to make him understand he doesn't want him to work himself over finding a way to meet his so-called "expectations", and also, that he doesn't have any in the first place. But he can already tell it isn't something Adrian 2121 can process. His number one goal, or rather, function, is to satisfy his owners and Even can try all he wants he won't ever be the one convincing him otherwise. 

Actually, he's starting to believe that convincing a robot of anything other than what's written in his code isn't a plausible deed.

"Okay," he nods eventually, albeit reluctantly. "Thanks."

"I remain at your disposal if you need me, sir," Adrian 2121 says before turning his back on him and getting back to work.

Even winces at the formality but shuts up. He's done enough for today.

Leaving Adrian 2121 alone, he walks to his office and drops into his seat, dejected. He stares at the wall a long time, replaying the conversation in his head to figure out how he could have acted differently. He doesn't even know why he cares so much - if Sonja knew, she would scoff at how ridiculous he's being now, overthinking so much and for what? 

For who?

He's not like Sonja, though. And that's why, when his eyes set on his shelf full of DVDs, a funny idea crosses his mind and then stuck to him. Adrian 2121 said he would collect more data about him, right? 

So what if they found another way to communicate, other than words?


	3. men du må la meg forstå det selv (but you have to let me understand it myself)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrian 2121 and Even watch a movie together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your kudos and comments.  
> We appreciate it a lot and are super happy some of you enjoy this AU.  
> We, for one, have a lot of fun creating it and hope that you can feel that while reading. <3

Even thinks about it long and hard for a couple of days before finally deciding on a movie. 

See, words never came easily to him. For years, he has struggled to express his emotions and his feelings with words. As a result, he has long suffered from not being understood by people around him. Miscommunication is something he knows all too well. 

And that's how he found refuge in movies. Before he directed them, he used to spend hours and days watching them. In the movies, he saw all the ways in which characters communicate, with words but also with looks or grand gestures. He listened to them put the right words to what he felt. But also, in a more subtle way, he noticed how each director managed to convey thoughts and feelings to the spectators with the right shots, the perfect colors or the finest metaphors. There were so many ways of expressing a single idea; the possibilities were endless.

So perhaps, once again, movies can help him communicate with Adrian 2121 if nothing else is working. 

In fact, ironically, the movie he decides on comes to him on set. He's supposed to film the first meeting of his two main characters, which revolves around a conversation in which they both have different opinions. His actors first recited the script word for word, but Even didn't like the result - it didn't feel natural at all. So he asked them to improvise. They seemed completely panicked at the idea, convinced that they absolutely had to discuss academic subjects for it to be interesting.

It was his assistant, Mikael, who came to help them and made a suggestion to the actors, "you've seen  _ Before Sunrise _ , haven't you? Remember, Jesse and Céline aren't trying to impress each other with great metaphysical theses. They're just sharing their perspectives and ideas on different aspects of life. Nothing complicated. It's just a story about two different young people, a cynic and a romantic, but who, by simply opening their hearts and minds to one another, get to understand each other better."

After that, it becomes obvious to Even that this is the movie he needs to show Adrian 2121. It feels right.

On Friday night, Even manages to get out of work at a reasonable time. He knows Sonja won't be back anytime soon since she has a night shift, and therefore they shouldn't be interrupted. This is the perfect opportunity.

He finds Adrian 2121 in the bedroom, folding and putting away their freshly ironed clothes. The robot must have heard him the second he has walked inside the apartment because, when Even spots him in the room, he's already staring back at the doorstep, as if he's been waiting for his owner to show up.

"Good evening, sir," he greets him immediately, grinning at him, but Even can see it looks nothing like a genuine smile. It's automatic. It's programmed. But that's not something Adrian 2121 can control, and Even doesn't blame him for it. So he forces a smile in return and ignores the fact that the robot doesn't care anyway. "Did you have a good day?"

"Yes, very good," Even nods. 

While speaking, Adrian 2121 hasn't stop folding their clothes, not even for a second; Even's next words though, make him pause his movements in an instant. "Tonight, we are watching a movie together."

It's clearly another thing he can't seem to process properly because they stare at each other for long seconds before Adrian 2121 speaks again.

"It's not something I'm programmed to do, sir."

The opposite would have been surprising, Even thinks but refrains himself from saying out loud. But since he was expecting such a reply coming from him, he bounces back quickly. He has a short but well thought out speech ready this time.

"I know. But you're also programmed to learn, right? To… adapt, that's what you told me. So, see it as a way to collect new data on me. I'm a film director, my whole life revolves around movies, so it makes sense for us to watch a movie together. Don't you think?"

Adrian 2121 seems to be considering the question, or at least, he doesn't tell him no straight away. Even feels slightly guilty for the way he's manipulating him into agreeing, using his words and his way of thinking against him. But it's just a movie, it can't hurt, right? And it's not a complete lie: maybe collecting data is just a robot version of getting to know each other. Different words but same idea.

"Ok," Adrian 2121 agrees eventually. He looks lost, clearly not in his element, but it's a yes nonetheless. Even can work with that.

"Perfect. Go sit in the living room. I will be back in a sec," Even tells him before running to his office. 

Of course, he knows his shelf of movies by heart, so he quickly finds the DVD he's looking for, and then, he's meeting Adrian 2121 in the living room. As asked, he's already sitting on the couch, although on the edge, like he's doing something wrong and he's getting ready to jump from it at any time.

"Relax," Even tells him with a smile. "Get comfortable."

"I can't feel discomfort, sir," Adrian 2121 retorts politely, but soon he's shifting to sit a bit further into the couch and Even takes it as a win.

Even gets everything ready before joining him, sitting by his side but leaving just enough space between them in case close physical contact is something Adrian 2121 would object to. At this point, Even thinks it's best to consider every possibility.

"Ready?" He asks Adrian 2121, who looks back at him in confusion.

"Ready for what, sir?"

Even holds back a smile and presses play.

***

He is still unsure why he is sitting on the sofa right now and staring at a screen to  _ watch a movie _ . It's not like it's a useful thing to do that will give his owner more time to do something else - especially, since the male human is sitting next to him watching the movie with him.

But the male human has asked him to do this as soon as he came home earlier and since he is programmed to do his owner's biding, here he is.

However, it wasn't only his owner asking him to do this what has convinced him, it was also his argument that it will help him to learn more about him. To collect data on him, so that he can adapt better to the things his male owner does and says.

And he really needs to do that. Because right now he spends way too much time on trying to process every instruction and every question he receives from the male human. It's not very effective and he needs to change that. So, if the male human thinks a movie will help him learn, then he will learn.

So, he sits on the sofa, his hands folded in front of him, and stares at the screen, giving the movie his full attention.

Nothing much has happened so far. The movie is set in a train going from Budapest to Paris and there's a straight, elderly human couple fighting loudly in German over their marital difficulties. A young female, probably the protagonist, is sitting across from them and seems to be annoyed by their fighting, so she eventually seeks a different seat.

After quietly looking at the screen and taking in all the information for exactly 12 minutes and 28 seconds, he can't help but eventually say something when the female human in the movie talks about her fear of flying. "That is very unreasonable of her. She should be more scared to ride on that train."

His owner pauses the movie and turns towards him. "What?" He asks, a curious frown on his face. "Why should she be scared?"

"Many reasons," he says, while he's searching for recent numbers on the web. "Mainly, because statistically, it is 10 times more likely to die in a train accident than in a plane crash. So, if she is scared to die on her travels, it would be more reasonable to take an airplane. The chances of dying in a plane crash are one in 15 million. This is an average because the statistics and the probability calculations vary. Also, most accidents happen during take-off or landing, meaning that chances of survival are high if it happens whereas train accidents happen at full speed and end fatally for many passengers. Another reason is, that she's a female human traveling alone. And she's talking to a male human she doesn't know anything about. The risks for female humans traveling alone are various. She could get kidnapped, raped, or murdered by any of the male humans. So, her fear is irrational and she should check her facts."

He looks from the screen to his owner when he has finished and there's silence. The male human next to him seems to be struggling for words once again. It's apparently a common issue for him, he makes a note to check for causes later.

"That's… all very true," the human eventually says very slowly and almost carefully. "But that is not how fears work, you know? They are meant to be irrational. Do you think people who are scared of spiders - like these tiny little spiders we have in the corners of our apartment all the time, and not actual deathly ones like a tarantula or something - don't know that there is no rational reason behind their fear?"

He shakes his head. "Tarantulas aren't deathly, sir."

When he earns another confused look, he elaborates: "The bite of a tarantula isn't deathly to humans. It hurts and it can lead to allergic reactions - but even the more dangerous species in Africa and Asia aren't truly dangerous to humans. They might lead to spasms and hallucinations but not death."

"Okay… that's good to know..." the human replies. "But also completely beside the point I was making. I was just trying to say that human fear is per se irrational. We are aware that most of the things we're scared of probably won't happen to us or that other things are way more dangerous."

He tries to process that for 57 seconds.

"But then why be scared, sir?" He doesn't even realize this is the first question - besides things concerning his tasks - he has ever asked and not just looked up by searching his databases or the web. "That's just irrational… stupid, as humans would say. Fear does not help unless humans are in a situation where their lives are actually in danger and they need to free adrenaline for survival. In any other situation, fear only hinders humans from doing things - like flying on a plane."

The male human examines him from the side, a look on his face that he can not process, so his system makes him apologize: "I'm sorry if that was an unsatisfying answer, sir. I didn't mean to disturb you with these facts. You can continue the movie if you want, sir."

There is silence and his system, once again, has no strategy on how to react to this situation, so he sits quietly and goes on energy-saving mode while waiting for the male human.

"Maybe you're right."

The reply comes after almost two minutes and he quickly turns his head towards the male human. He looks almost distraught - like he has just learned a fact that he never thought to be possible. "Maybe you are… but I don't think there's a way for humans to control all their irrational fears. And trust me, I would be the first one to try. I've been held back by my own head and my fears way too many times."

And with that, the male human restarts the movie, leaving him to attempt to process the answer. He is sure that he shouldn't be having problems with processing every single reply he receives from his owner. It hasn't happened with the female human, not even once! So, why does his system get so confused with the male human?

Yes, he has never talked this much with the female human and she has never talked to him about anything but his tasks - but still...

He was programmed - no, actually, made to understand humans and cater to their every need. Yet, here he is, unable to hold a simple conversation because his system is unable to process his owner's answers.

That shouldn't happen.

Maybe he is defective after all - no matter what the male human has said to him a couple of days ago, no matter his software scans (he has run five by now) all came back clear. It's the only logical explanation for his failure to understand the male human.

When he finally focuses back on the movie, the two humans are just getting off the train in Vienna together - which he doesn't understand because the female was supposed to go to Paris. But he doesn't ask his owner about it. Instead, he continues to watch silently again.

After another 20 minutes, he has to say something again.

"Who is this weird woman?" He straight-up asks this time. "What is she doing with the younger female's hand? Why does she think she can read anything from it?"

He can almost hear his gears working that's how unable he is to process what is happening on that screen in front of him. He searches his databases and the web for _ fortune-tellers _ and reads several articles at the same time while waiting for the male human's reply.

The movie is paused again and the male human clears his throat before saying: "You're not going to like the answer."

"I don't like or dislike things, sir. I just fact-check them to see if they are true, correct, and rational," he answers. "But from what I've just read, this is neither. It's ridiculous - what makes her think she can tell someone's future from their palm? Some algorithms can somewhat predict the future, even though it is still pretty much inaccurate and has a high rate of error. And there's high-functioning technology and highly complex mathematics behind that… Surely, the female human knows that this woman is a fraud. Right?"

***

Maybe he shouldn't, but Even finds every single one of Adrian 2121's reactions absolutely endearing. Sure, it's mostly facts that he looks up on the internet before sharing them in the form of long, in-depth, rational rants. He's also definitely butchering one of his favorite movies with his down-to-earth state of mind. But Even can't be mad at him for it. For the first time, Adrian 2121 is talking to him without reciting protocols, like he's sharing his actual personal point of view and not what he's been programmed to say, and that's exactly what he was looking for.

Sonja would probably roll her eyes at him and remind him robots don't have personal opinions, it's just in their code to share facts and to rant like a Wikipedia page, but Even doesn't care. How many robots does she know anyway? Maybe Adrian 2121's behavior is unique. Maybe it's  _ his _ and no other robots'.

"Sure, in theory, she knows the woman is a fraud," Even replies to Adrian 2121's previous question. "But we also like to believe in mysterious and complex things, forces that are beyond us. It makes everyday life less boring. How cool would it be if magic really existed? If some people could see the future or communicate with the dead?"

"But some things are just impossible. You can't cheat with the laws of physics," Adrian 2121 protests. Of course, he does.

"Do physicists really know everything? Aren't there an infinite number of unproven theories and unknown variables in the universe? What if among them there were some that would explain magic?" 

Adrian 2121 opens his mouth to, probably, contest him, but ends up closing his mouth again with a frown, like he doesn't know what else to say. Even is weirdly proud of himself. Did he manage to outsmart him?

"Just accept a little magic into your life," Even teases him before pressing play again. 

From the corner of his eye, he's pretty sure he sees Adrian 2121  _ pout _ at him. And it doesn't put a smile on Even's lips for the rest of the night. Not at all.


	4. og alt vi gjør er hemmelig (and everything we do is secret)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adrian 2121 has a decision to make. Even doesn't believe in coincidences.  
> Together, they make progress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thank you so much for your comments and your precious feedback! It means a whole lot to us <3  
> I hope you enjoy this chapter, and don't hesitate to share your thoughts with us. It's always a great help!  
> xx

It's Friday night, Even is eating delicious Italian food and drinking expensive white wine at one of his favorite restaurants, and yet. 

And yet he's bored. He's stopped listening to whatever work story Sonja has been talking about for the past ten minutes or so, and his mind is everywhere but here, in this fancy restaurant where he should be happy to be spending time with Sonja. With his _fiancée_. He should but he's not; he couldn't care less, actually. 

And he knows it's becoming an issue. He shouldn't feel that way when he's supposed to be marrying the woman sitting in front of him in a few months. He shouldn't be mad that Sonja surprised him by coming home earlier to invite him to the restaurant, thus ruining his movie plans with Adrian 2121. Watching movies with their handyrobot shouldn't get him more excited than a date with the woman he-

Loves?

The realization is brutal. Does he still love her? If he has to think about it, if he's at a point where he's questioning it, it says a lot about his true feelings, doesn't it? What if it's the reason why he's been so reluctant to the idea of planning their wedding? 

Speaking of, Sonja drags him out of his internal turmoil with a heavy sigh and a question he definitely doesn't want to answer to, "Even... Are you listening to me? Do you even care about our wedding?!"

Even realizes that she must have shifted the subject to their wedding plans. It's almost like she could feel what his mind has been at.

"Sorry, I'm just a bit tired," Even lies. "I care. Of course I do. What were you saying?"

Sonja glances at him in annoyance but eventually moves on without lingering on his behavior. "I was saying we need to settle on a wedding date and then decide where we want to get married - Church? City hall? - and where we want to host our reception, too. There are months, almost a year of waiting list for the most beautiful places so we need to take a decision as soon as possible."

If Even didn't love and respect this restaurant and its employees, he would fake food poisoning just to have an excuse to run to the restrooms and hide there for the rest of the night. Maybe forever.

Because he can't answer any of it. He doesn't want to. He tries to picture himself in a suit, waiting for Sonja in her beautiful white dress, walking down the aisle toward him, but all it does to him is stressing him out. The simple thought of it is suffocating him.

"Even, seriously," Sonja loses patience again, and he really doesn't blame her. "You're not here with me at all. I could be having dinner on my own, it would be the same thing!"

"I'm sorry."

He sees her take a deep breath, composing herself. Even is thankful she won't make a scene in front of all these strangers for about half a second, right before she decides on taking _that_ road. "Have you slept? You're not overworking yourself, right?"

The patronizing tone she's using is everything Even hates. It's just a question of seconds before she asks him-

"Have you taken your meds? We can make an appointment if you feel off. And maybe it's time for you to reduce your hours. I know you love your job and people are depending on you and all that, but it shouldn't be more important than your mental health. We've talked about it a million times already."

Maybe it's time for him to call the wedding off. Maybe it's time for him to stand up for himself, to be honest with her, and to tell her he isn't just having second thoughts: he _knows_ it's a bad idea and he doesn't want to spend the rest of his life with her. Maybe, for once, he should speak.

But he doesn't. Instead, he leans on the table to lay his hand on hers, forces a smile, and tries his best to reassure her, the way he's used to. He's been playing this act for years now. He knows it by heart.

"I'm sorry I'm being weird, but don't worry about it. I swear I'm okay," he tells her. "I would tell you if I wasn't. It's just… I had a long day, we had issues with our equipments and one of the secondary role actors is going all diva on us, it's driving everybody crazy. Just a shitty day. I will be fine."

It seems to do the trick, because soon Sonja is smiling again, and going on another monologue about the flowers or the cake or _whatever_ wedding thing Even won't think about.

He's going to tell her. Not tonight. Maybe not tomorrow. But he will.

Eventually…

*

A few days later, in order to make up for their cancelled movie night, Even decides to try something new. So far, he's been showing Adrian 2121 movies that meant something to him. And although the official justification for their movie nights is to give Adrian 2121 more information about his owner, Even is curious to see what would happened if they changed the dynamic. Because Even wants nothing more than to get to know him, too. He doesn't want it to be a one-way thing.

That's why he gets the idea of offering Adrian 2121 the opportunity to choose the movie.

Of course, while Even is all smiles when he tells him, "I want you to pick a movie," Adrian, on the other hand, is back at looking confused and slightly suspicious.

"Why would I pick the movie, sir?" He asks, and, objectively, Even knows he should have expected that kind of reaction coming from him. But in his excitement, he forgot to come prepared with yet another speech to make him yield.

That's fine, though. Even got better at improvisation with him. "Don't worry about the reason why. Just… Trust me. I need your help finding a movie. It can be anything. There is no right or wrong choice. Just pick the first movie that catches your attention."

And before Adrian 2121 has time to protest again, Even waves at him to follow him so he can lead him to his office, where all his movies are stored. Adrian 2121 still looks utterly lost but he steps inside the office nonetheless, and soon he's standing in front of the shelf, eyes flying from one DVD to another. 

***

_Pick a movie._

He's still confused by the male human's request when he's already standing in front of the shelf that holds all of the DVDs belonging to his owners. Actually, he's 98% sure that the movies all belong to the male human and the female human doesn't care for them one bit.

They've been watching a movie every Friday for the past four weeks but this is the first time he is supposed to pick a movie. So far, all movies were picked by the male human. After their first movie, _Before Sunrise_ , they watched _The Intouchables_ in their second week during which the male human has laughed a lot and has tried to explain the jokes and funny sequences to him. He has shrugged it off and focused more on expanding his knowledge on physical disabilities. After that, they've watched _Romeo & Juliet _ which must be the most ridiculous movie ever. But the male human loves it to bits, so he has tried to keep his mouth shut as best as he could.

And last week, his owner has chosen _Inside Out_. A kids movie, actually, but it has proven to be the male human's best choice. While it was blatantly trying to be funny a lot, it has made him understand a little better how human minds and feelings work. Additionally, it has made him do some research on mental health since the male human has told him about his own mental illness.

He is bipolar and the way, he has explained it to him - while being ridiculous as he has used the unrealistic and simplified imagery from the movie - has made him understand some things a lot better. His owner has explained that during a manic episode, joy took over in his brain and that while anger and disgust might sometimes be there too, sadness and especially fear would completely vanish from his mind. And then, during a depressive episode he would be consumed by sadness and fear, paired sometimes with anger and disgust, mostly directed towards himself, while joy was mostly absent.

_Pick a movie._

Today, the male human wants him to pick a movie which makes absolutely no sense. Why should he pick a movie? The titles mean nothing to him, so he doesn't know what kind of movie is hiding behind the words. Also, he doesn't care for movies whatsoever and the only reason they are doing this is for him to collect data on his owner. What kind of data can he possibly collect when the movie is his choice?

However, since it was an instruction by his owner, here he is reading the titles printed on the spines of the DVDs on the shelf in front of him. After a rough estimate, there must be about 250 DVDs in the office.

Even with his advanced reading speed it would take a while to read all the titles and their movie night might be over before it has even started. Weirdly enough, he thinks that that would be a bad thing, so he skips over the titles faster looking for something that sounds familiar.

Eventually, his eyes land on a black DVD with white writing on its spine. It's only one word, written in capital letters.

 _GRAVITY_.

He pulls the DVD out of the shelf and gives it to the male human, relieved that he was able to find something. Maybe he can even learn something he doesn't know about gravity yet while watching a documentary on this natural force.

He has no idea why his owner owns such a movie - but what does it matter? He is the one to pick the movie today and maybe it isn't such a bad idea after all. At the very least, he won't have to correct all the wrong facts and the inaccuracies in the movie again.

"This movie?" The male human turns the DVD over in his hands and shrugs. "Well, if you're sure… let's get going then."

*

It doesn't take very long for him to realize his mistake. While he is very impressed with the images of the earth in the first minutes, he soon has to realize that this is not a documentary at all.

Instead it is some SyFy-thriller thing.

When the space shuttle gets hit by orbital debris and starts rolling rapidly, he can't stop himself anymore. "That is not realistic," he states and turns towards the male human, waiting for him to pause the movie like he always does when he starts to correct the movie. Once the movie is paused, he continues: "It would take an entire satellite or something equally heavy for this to happen. And it would have to hit the shuttle at the tip of the wing with a relative velocity of about 1 km/s. Otherwise the impact wouldn't be great enough. And then, the shuttle probably wouldn't have remained structurally intact like this, anyways! However, any piece of debris is much lighter than this and would travel at much smaller relative velocity, so there wouldn't be such great impacts on the shuttle. Why make a movie about space when you can't even stick to the facts?" 

The male human gives him a smile. "Whatever you say… You know you could literally tell me straight-out lies and I wouldn't even notice because I have no clue. But you have to admit, the cinematography is stunning. Seeing the earth like this, it's amazing."

"I'm not programmed to lie, sir," he says and then nods. "Yes, sir, the images of the earth are very realistic."

At 39 minutes, the human has to pause the movie again.

Because apart from it being unrealistic that they would have reached the ISS - that is in a different orbit than the shuttle - at all, it's the hair of the female astronaut that irritates him the most when she's taking of her gear in the spaceship. "That's not possible, sir. Her hair should be all over the place. There's zero gravity there, it can't just stay perfectly attached to her head like this. They show the zero gravity perfectly with everything else - but they just forgot her hair?"

"I didn't know you cared about hair so much!" The male human seems to rather enjoy himself judging from the teeth-flashing grin he's flashing in his direction. "Do you also care about your own hair this much? Is that why it's always perfectly aligned?"

Once again, they have reached a point at which he cannot process the male human's statements anymore. He is very sure it's humor but he is incapable to comprehend it. "I do not care about hair, sir," he eventually answers the question truthfully though he knows that it isn't the reply he is supposed to give. He just doesn't know the correct one. "I care about facts and logic and, in this case, gravity."

For a moment, they are quite - the human is still smiling brightly at him, his blue eyes flitting to his hair every now and then, so he is the one to break the silence: "Anyway - gravity, why is the movie called that? It should rather be called _Angular Momentum_. The movie doesn't have much to do with gravity. The theory of gravitation by Newton states that each particle of matter attracts every other particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So the farther apart the particles are, and/or the less massive the particles, the less the gravitational force. So, what we see in the movie is zero gravity in the spaceship and in space - but what we mostly see is angular momentum. This theory describes how in space an object rotates until another force intervenes to slow it down, change its direction or stop it. So, in conclusion, that is what the movie should be called because that is what it is about."

"Okay, Isaac."

He stares at the male human in a way that, if he were human, could only be described as utter confusion.

He cannot process at all.

Why has the male human called him Isaac just now? Like - that makes no sense whatsoever?! What is the reason? Why would he…? He is not Isaac Newton. Isaac Newton was one of the most influential scientists who had lived in the 18th century. A key figure in the scientific revolution while he is just a robot trained to support his owners with their domestic work, security, knowledge and fact checking, and whatever else they might need help with.

***

Over the past few weeks, Even has often seen Adrian 2121 looking puzzled after something he had said. Most of the time, it was because of feelings he couldn't understand, or polite gestures a human apparently shouldn't show towards a robot. Even became quite good at figuring out what would confuse him and what wouldn't. But sarcasm, an element of language that was very much human, and therefore something very natural for Even to use, hadn't been part of it until now. 

Adrian 2121's expression after being called Isaac reminds him of this reality.

"That's not my name," Adrian 2121 retorts after a long pause. "And I'm nothing like Isaac Newton. I'm just repeating what he theorized."

Even doesn't bother to point out he knows all of that. He's actually more interested in _his_ name. The last time he has tried to talk about it with him was back at their first meeting, and it's been a disaster. However, Even likes to think their relationships has evolved since then and this time Sonja isn't here to give him a sermon.

So, "why are you called _Adrian 2121_ by the way? Are these random numbers, or…?", he asks him.

The change of topics seems to appease Adrian 2121. He's back on familiar grounds. "Adrian is the name of my model series. 2121 stands for my date of creation."

"Your date of creation?"

"Yes, sir. I was finished at 21:21 on the 21st June."

Even holds himself back from commenting on how particular his birth date is - Adrian probably wouldn't see what's so special about it. Most humans wouldn't either, Sonja is always the first one to make fun of him because of it. But Even loves those kinds of coincidences and likes to see mysterious signs in it.

His name isn't very personal, though, and it makes Even weirdly sad about it. Adrian 2121 deserves his own name. He shouldn't be called like any other robot among so many others from the same model series with similar names.

Ultimately, it gives Even an idea.

"I think we should give you a proper name," he suggests, his enthusiasm increasing as he thinks about it. He's sick of referring to him as Adrian 2121 all the time. It's time to find something special for him! "Would you like to choose your own name?"

Adrian 2121, on the other hand, doesn't seem to share his mind. "Sir, I already have a proper name. Robots don't get to choose their names."

"Rules are made to be changed," Even persists. "And by the way, it's time for you to stop calling me _sir_ . I would very much love it if you could call me by my name. I know it's not very _protocol compatible_ , but see it as a way to… To make me happy?"

Adrian 2121 stares at him for a while, his eyes studying his face with caution, until he asks carefully, "would it satisfy you, sir?"

The choice of word almost makes him wince, but he nods anyway, "yes, it would."

"So you want me to call you Even?"

"Yes. Please."

Adrian 2121 shifts on the couch, clearly fighting an internal battle. "Alright, Even," he agrees eventually.

Even grins in victory. It's getting better, right? Next step though: convincing Adrian 2121 to adopt a new name. A proper, personal name.

"Thank you, Isaac," he's back at teasing him. "Hey, it would actually suit you pretty well, don't you think?!" Adrian 2121 glares at him, not convinced at all. "Maybe we could go through a list of names and see if one of them feels right? How do people choose a name for their kids, I have no idea…"

"Isaac is also a biblical name," Adrian 2121 tells him all of sudden.

"What?" 

Of course, Even knows that. But he wasn't expecting Adrian to mention it out of nowhere.

And once again, he goes on a rant. "I'm making researches on the name _Isaac_. And aside from Isaac Newton, I'm finding a lot of references from the Hebrew Bible and the Christian Old Testament. Chapter 21 of the Book of Genesis is called "The Birth of Isaac". Isaac is an important figure in the Abrahamic religions, including Judaism, Christianity, and Islam. Isaac's name means "he will laugh", reflecting the laughter, in disbelief, of Abraham and Sarah, when told by God that they would have a child."

He pauses, and Even takes the opportunity to intervene. "Wait. You said chapter 21?"

"Yes. Chapter 21 of the Book of-"

"Another recurrence!" Even exclaims in excitement. "You were born at 21:21 on the 21st June. And now you're telling me the chapter _21_ of the Bible is called "The Birth of Isaac"?!" 

"Sir," Adrian 2121 starts, ready to argue, but stops straight away as he realizes his mistake. "I mean… Even. I wasn't born. I'm a robot. I was made. Or created."

"Fine, created!" Even shrugs. Details. "But you see the patterns, right?"

"I don't see any patterns. Those are only coincidences."

"I don't believe in coincidences," Even smiles. This is it. This is the right name. There are signs and there are meanings and it's just perfect. Or, almost perfect. "What about Isak? It's the Norwegian version of it. What do you think?"

Adrian 2121 stares at him, mouth slightly ajar. It's probably been a lot already for one night, but Even feels way too excited about it to give up now. It feels right, and he can't fathom that Adrian - _Isak_ \- wouldn't feel the same way.

"Isak," Adrian 2121 tries it out. "Isak."

"Does it sound right? Do you like it?"

He frowns, confused by the question. Even can hear him already, _there is nothing to like or not like, it's just a name_. 

And yet.

"Do _you_ like it?" Adrian 2121 asks him, and this time Even is the one being surprised.

"Huh… Yes, I do. A lot."

"Isak," he repeats, almost a whisper, and then he looks up at Even again and says, "okay, Even. My new name is Isak."

Even almost jumps off the couch in joy.


	5. du kan få vite hvem jeg egentlig er (you can know who I really am)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak learns to use Even's and his own name and a lot more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys, thank you so much!  
> We're very happy that you seem to like our fic and we appreciate all your comments a lot. <33  
> I hope you'll enjoy the new chapter and don't forget to let us know what you think, hehe.  
> <3
> 
> P.S. don't mind us, the chapters are starting to get a little longer... ;-)

Just as he is putting the last groceries into the cupboard, he can hear the door to the apartment being opened. As he listens to the sounds following, he knows it's the male human who is hanging up his denim jacket on the coat rack.

Even - it is Even.

His owner has asked him to call him by his name and it's probably best to also refer to him in that way in his thoughts. It's just not that easy because there's a contradiction between his programming and his owner's - Even's - instructions.

Silently, he closes the cupboard and steps into the hallway to greet his owner.

The smile appears automatically according to protocol, once the male human looks up to him. "Good evening, sir," he says before hastily correcting himself, "sorry… Good evening, Even. Did you have a good day at work?"

"Yes, thank you, Isak, I did," the human replies and reciprocates his smile. "How about you, Isak? Good day?"

He can almost _hear_ his system trying to process; that's how hard he has to work to make sense of Even's question. Eventually, he at least manages to connect the name Isak to himself - because yes, that's what his owner has decided to call him a couple of days ago. They just haven't seen each other since then, so this is the first time he actually hears him use that name for him.

But he is still struggling with the question.

When he looks up at Even, the male human is watching him with his eyebrows slightly raised and an expectant smile on his lips. So, he quickly answers as best as he can: "I had a normal day, s- Even. Did the laundry in the morning and then I prepared your dinner. In the afternoon, I cleaned the bathrooms and went grocery shopping. I've just finished putting all the groceries away."

*

The next day, he makes sure to do better. He has switched some settings around and is positive that it will help him with referring to Even by his name.

So, when the door opens, he puts down the tea towel and walks into the hallway to greet the male human with his programmed smile. "Hello, Even," he says and takes Even's jacket to put it away. "Did you have a good day, Even? Was everything to your satisfaction, Even?"

There is a laugh and he is trying to understand why.

Is he doing it wrong again? But he has used the human's name - why is he laughing at him now?

This is starting to get frustrating - no, wait, he isn't capable of getting frustrated. It's just that… he doesn't know what he is doing wrong. He doesn't understand, he can't process it at all. Even though he is doing everything his programming is allowing him to do, he is still doing it all wrong.

"Isak, hey… Look at me." He snaps out of his thoughts when Even is standing right in front of him, flicking his fingers in front of his eyes. "Everything is alright, okay? You're doing fine, you know… But you don't have to overdo it. You don't have to use my name in every question and every sentence, you know?"

Oh… "Okay, sir... Okay, Even."

Even smiles at him, raising his hand a little but then he lets it fall down to his side again in an aborted move and shrugs instead. "I had a shit day, to be honest," he answers instead. "But yeah… I'm super hungry, can we eat before we talk?"

He furrows his brows as humans would do it to show their irritation. "Even, I don't eat… But I can warm up your dinner if you want me to? You can take a shower in the meantime… I made lasagna."

"Jeez, Isak, you're the best, really. Thank you."

***

Objectively, Even knows he didn't really spend an hour trying to unlock the front door, but it sure as hell feels like it. 

After weeks of stress and technical problems at work, he finally managed to shoot this very important scene, and the crew was in such a good mood after that they all decided to go out and celebrate, hence his current state of drunkenness. 

It's not something he does very often - not anymore, at least - since it fucks with his meds and he's been stable for far too long to ruin everything for one too many drinks (not to mention that Sonja loves to remind him that he's an adult, and apparently adults don't need to drink like "brainless students"). Tonight was a special occasion though. And the whole crew went out to the bar, so Even decided to make the most of his evening. Just this once.

What he didn't consider, however, is how much of a lightweight he'd become (Mikael has definitely ended the night with _even more_ embarrassing videos of him... If his friend decides to ruin his reputation someday, he has the perfect material for it. Thankfully, Mikael is basically an angel, so his image should remain intact for now), and here he is, struggling to get home in the middle of the night. Luckily, he remembers Sonja has a night shift, so at least he won't have to endure one of her sermons.

Once he finally manages to get inside, an hour or two minutes later - who knows? - , he doesn't bother switching any lights on since he knows his apartment like the back of his hand, and heads straight for the bedroom. 

He's clumsily crossing the living room when he almost has a heart attack.

"Good night, Even," someone greets him in the dark and Even's heart as well as his whole body jump at the unexpected voice. 

"What the fuck! What-"

Deep down, Even recognizes the voice perfectly, for it belongs to Isak. But Isak is supposed to be in sleep mode, and not somewhere in his living room, in the _dark_ , greeting him, and Even is way too drunk for his brain to catch up on the situation.

Fortunately, Isak has the presence of mind to switch the lights on for him. Even ends up half-blind but at least he has the visual proof that it's neither a stranger in his apartment nor a hallucination, but Isak, with his straight and stoic posture, his angel face and his silky curls and-

Alright. He's never drinking like that ever again.

"I'm sorry, Even," Isak apologizes, and he does look like he's feeling guilty. Which is impossible, right? Even has to remind himself Isak doesn't feel anything, or at least not the way humans do, to stop himself from making a fool out of himself by hugging him.

No hugs. No touching. No, nothing. 

"I didn't mean to scare you," Isak adds since Even lost the ability to speak. He still knows how to smile though, and he does, as he remembers this moment sounds a lot like the first alone conversation they've shared together, except they were in the opposite situation.

"It's okay. Don't worry about it," Even finally manages to form words, smoothing the slight crease between Isak's eyebrows in the process. "I'm just… Aren't you supposed to be sleeping? Or... whatever you do during the night."

"Madam asked me to wait for you," Isak explains and it takes Even way too long to figure out _who_ Madam is.

"You mean Sonja?"

Isak nods. "Yes. She said she couldn't reach you but she had to go to work so she wanted me to make sure you got home at some point during the night, or else I should call her and let her know."

Confused, Even reaches into his jeans pocket and pulls out his phone, which, _oh_ , is out of battery. Now that he's thinking about it, maybe he was supposed to be home in time for a quick dinner with Sonja before she was meant to leave for the hospital. 

"Was she… pissed?" He asks, although he already knows the answer. He stood her up and he wasn't answering his phone: he won't hear the end of it for the next couple of weeks, and that's the best-case scenario.

"Madam was angry, yes," Isak confirms. And, _this_ word, again. 

"You can call her Sonja, you know," Even tells him, forgetting all about Sonja's upcoming tantrum.

"But madam didn't tell me I could," Isak points out with a frown.

"I'm giving you permission. Call me Even. Call her Sonja. And I call you Isak. Let's all go by our names, okay?" Even says before adding, "does it sound okay to you?"

As often when it goes against Isak's programming, the robot is silent for a while, processing the new information. But eventually, he ends up agreeing, "okay. I will call her Sonja."

"Great," Even beams at him. He doesn't know why it makes him so happy but it does. And he wouldn't mind staying up with Isak the rest of the night, but he's tired and he needs to rest to be able to face Sonja tomorrow. So, reluctantly, he says, "it's late. We should go to sleep."

Isak nods again. "Of course. Good night, Even."

"Good night, Isak."

That night Even falls asleep with the memory of Isak saying his name. Because for some reason, he likes the way he says it the most.

****

The apartment door closes behind the female human and he walks back into the kitchen to get a start on the extra task she has given to him for today - cleaning out all the kitchen cupboards.

He hasn't seen Even this morning, so he assumes that he has left early to shoot some scenes in that special morning light he loves to gush over.

However, he soon has to realize that his assumption was wrong when he hears noises from the bathroom. He turns off the water he has just started to run and walks back into the hallway to check what the noise is.

Once he is standing in front of the bedroom door that was left ajar, he finally realizes it's music blasting over running water. Has Sonja forgotten to turn it off?

With a little frown, he walks across the room and towards the bathroom door to open it and enter into the room. The music is blasting from a phone on the cupboard and the shower is indeed running - but… there is also someone standing in that shower, humming along to the music.

Oh…

His eyes wander over the body until he has made sure that it is Even. Then, he retreats backwards into the bedroom.

He is almost back at the bedroom door when the music suddenly stops and he hears Even ask, "Isak?"

Probably the human got a call from someone and that's why he stepped out of the shower and turned off the music. It's none of his business anyway, so he quickly walks back into the kitchen to start with his task.

Midway he stops again and frowns - because Even calls the name again and because he can hear steps from the bedroom.

And then something clicks.

 _Isak_ \- that's him.

So he turns around to go back to Even and to ask what he wants - but Even is already leaning in the doorway, a towel around his hips, and smiles at him in confusion. "Why are you running away from me?"

"No, I wasn't… or at least, I didn't mean to," he says apologetically. "I'm just… I thought you were taking a call. I didn't realize, you were talking to me. I think I'm still getting used to this whole name thing. Sorry, Even… I didn't mean to disturb you either. I just wasn't aware that you're still here… I thought Mad- Sonja forgot to turn off the shower."

Even's smile grows and he nods. "Alright… well, I'm gonna get dressed now, Isak. How about you make some breakfast."

*

"Isak? Can you help me with his?"

He immediately walks over to Even who is standing on a ladder to grab something from the top shelf in the office. Even hands him the box he has been looking for and then climbs down the ladder.

When he is standing in front of Isak, he is smiling like a Cheshire Cat and his eyes are sparkling. "You reacted."

"Huh? Of course, I reacted - you asked for my help, Even," he retorts with a huff. Sometimes - most of the time, actually - whatever is going on in the human's head is so far beyond him that it is almost frustrating to him. It would be if he were capable to feel frustration.

Even's smile just gets impossibly broader while he takes the box from Isak to put it onto his desk. "Yeah… but you haven't reacted to your name like this ever before," he says. "So, that's another win."

A crease appears between Isak's brows while he processes Even's words.

***

It's only midday, Even still has hours of filming and yet all he's thinking about is when he will get to go home. 

To go home to Isak.

It's such a foreign feeling for him. Because for months, all Even has been dreading was the moment he had to drive back to his apartment, a place that didn't mean comfort for him anymore. And maybe the reason why he's been so busy during those months was because he wanted to be: he would show up at the editing room to "help", he would hide in the writer's room and pretend to be busy, he would even get unnecessarily involved in the promotion and marketing reunions, in things he usually hates… And all of this, so he wouldn't have to go home to Sonja.

It's been going on for months but the worst part is, Even hasn't been fully aware of what he was doing until now. Until he had a new reason to go home; a pleasant, interesting, exciting reason named Isak.

And it isn't right, he knows that. He shouldn't be running away from his fiancée the way he does. He shouldn't like the company of their robot more than hers. But Even has always preferred denial over big, radical decisions. So for now, denial it is.

"Are you dreaming about your wedding?" Mikael asks all of sudden. 

Even has almost forgotten his presence. He's been eating a sandwich next to him the whole time while Even has been smoking his… third? Even shakes the empty Coke can where he's been throwing his cigarette butts. 

Yeah, probably third cigarette of the lunch break. He has some issues, clearly.

"Yeah. I was definitely daydreaming about our wedding flowers," he snorts.

"Not to be that guy but shouldn't you?"

Maybe. Most likely. But Even doesn't, that's for sure.

"I don't know, I've never been about to get married before," he shrugs it off. 

At least with Mikael, he doesn't have to try too hard. He always sees right through his bullshit so lying and playing an act wouldn't work anyway. Also, Mikael keeps saying he's a shitty actor and it's a good thing he's good behind the camera. Whatever.

"Well, I'm glad you're about to but not before half a year at least," Mikael mutters. Even glances at him and raises an eyebrow at him. "What? You talk about it like a death sentence. So don't ask me to pretend to be excited about it when you're not."

He does have a good point.

Mikael stands up then and takes a spot beside him. He also steals his cigarette, takes a drag from it before choking on it, like every single time, and giving it back to him. They've smoked weed together about a thousand times but tobacco ain't doing it for him, although for some reason, Mikael won't ever grow tired of trying. He's stubborn like that.

"We all need to grow up at some point," Even says and thinks none of it. 

Mikael knows it. That's why he scoffs at him and retorts, "just call me when you decide you're done torturing yourself. I will help you run away in your white dress."

Even snorts.

Mikael has never been a fan of Sonja, and it's only gotten worse with time. Now, they can barely be in the same room without throwing passive-aggressive comments at each other. Even has no idea how they would all survive a wedding.

"And what about Sonja's last desperate attempt to put a ring on it?" Mikael asks and Even frowns at him, confused. "Your robot? How is it going? Honestly, you're the last person I would have thought would buy one but… Love makes you do strange things, right?" Mikael jokes.

Even huffs for good measure. "Trust me, I wasn't happy about it at all, at first. But Isak is great."

"Isak?"

Oh, right. Even keeps forgetting calling his robot by a name that doesn't sound like a microwave model isn't common.

"My… robot. Isak is his name."

"His…" Mikael starts but pauses, taking Even in for a moment. He's probably trying to figure out if Even is messing with him (he isn't), if he really just referred to a robot as a "he" (he did), and finally, if he has really said the robot's name was Isak (he totally did, too). Eventually, he speaks again, "okay, cool. Isak. Well, I can't wait to meet him."

Even knows befriending Mikael is probably the only good decision he has ever made in his life, but it's always good to get a reminder of it once in a while.

So he smiles at him and nods, "anytime."

***

Isak closes the fridge door once he has put the last items on his mental grocery list, and then walks into the hallway to put on his shoes. After his laces are tied in a secure double knot, he opens the drawer to get out a backpack and several tote bags. He puts the tote bags into the backpack and the backpack onto his back before taking a set of keys out of the bowl on top of the drawer.

Just when he is ready to leave, the apartment door is unlocked from outside and Even enters into the hallway, stopping abruptly when he almost crashes into Isak.

"Oh… sorry, I didn't expect someone to be standing behind the door," Even says and takes a step back. His eyes wandering to the backpack on Isak's back. "What are you doing?"

"Well, yes, the chances that someone would be standing behind the door at the exact moment that you're coming home are highly unlikely but it's still possible, obviously," Isak spits out before he can stop himself. Then he shrugs and pulls on the string of the backpack. "I was just on my way to go grocery shopping, Even."

"Great. I'll go with you."

Confused, Isak looks up at him and knits his eyebrows. "Go with me?" He's trying to process why that would be necessary but there's no need for Even to come with him to the supermarket. He's been doing that on his own ever since Even and Sonja have acquired him and he never has had a problem with it. "I don't know why you'd need to go with me?! I can take care of it on my own."

Even smiles brightly at him. "Well, maybe I just want to go with you."

"Want to?" Isak asks skeptically. He's mostly beyond questioning Even's motives - because he is simply incapable of understanding them - but sometimes, when they seem especially peculiar, he just can't stop himself. "Why would you want to go grocery shopping with me?"

"Well, why not?" Was all the reply he got before Even opened the apartment door again and stepped out into the staircase. He waited for Isak to follow him and then locked the door behind him. "Plus, we can take the car, so you don't have to carry all that heavy stuff all the way home by yourself."

Isak huffs while following Even down the stairs. "It's not heavy, Even… Well, at least it's not heavy for me. I can just adjust to the weight of the stuff I'm carrying. It's really not necessary for you to come."

"Yeah, but as I said - I want to come with you," Even retorts, throwing Isak a smile over his shoulder. "Just accept it, Isak."

Isak frowns in the direction of Even's back. "You really are the strangest human ever."

*

When they arrive at the supermarket, Even gets them a shopping cart and Isak puts the backpack inside of it. He grabs the handle and determinedly steers it towards the fruit and vegetables stands. Even follows him slowly, his gaze wandering around. "Do you have a shopping list?" He asks once he catches up to Isak. "I have no idea what we need."

Isak just nods and puts a bunch of bananas into the cart. "Of course. Otherwise, how would I know what to buy, Even?"

"Well, to be honest, I usually just get what I crave at that moment… anyway - can I maybe see the list, so I can at least pretend to be helpful?"

"That is very imprudent, though. That way you will end up spending way more money than need be and you might not get any of the things you need… You should really make a list when you go shopping next time, Even. And no, you can't see the list."

Frowning, Even stops in front of the cart, so that Isak is unable to move. "Why not? Are you being mean to me?"

"What? No… I can't be mean to you… I have the list in my system, there is simply no way to show it to you, Even. But you can get potatoes and carrots if you want to help. They are over there next to the onions. We need about 1 kg of each."

"You can't be mean to me?" Even smirks and before Isak can reply, he disappears to get the vegetables Isak told him to get.

For a second, Isak follows him with his eyes before he shakes out of it and goes to grab the rest of the fruits on his list.

After about 30 minutes, they managed to get almost everything on the list and are now standing in the aisle with toiletries. "Alright, so what do we need, Isak?" Even asks while already scanning the shelves with his eyes. "I think I need shampoo…"

"No, I bought your shampoo last week, it's in the cupboard in the bathroom. But Sonja needs conditioner, toothpaste, body lotion, and face cream. Also, you're out of toilet paper and washing powder." Isak checks his shopping list and nods. "Those are the last items, so after this, we are finished."

"Hmmm…" Even hums absentmindedly while he is picking two different bottles of conditioner out of the shelf. "Which brand does she use again? She'll kill us if we get the wrong one, Isak. We have to get the right one."

Isak looks at the bottles and shakes his head before grabbing the right one out of the shelf to put it into their full cart.

With a heavy sigh, Even puts the bottles back into the shelf and turns around to Isak, obviously about to say something to him but, before he does, something seems to catch his attention instead and he closes his mouth again. "Bente," Even then squeaks out instead and Isak is completely lost.

Until someone behind him says "hey, Even" in an equally surprised voice.

Isak turns around to see a small female human standing in front of him, a shopping basket in one hand and a human child clinging onto her free one.

Quickly, Isak looks back to Even who still seems overwhelmed - and also, unsatisfied with the appearance of the female. Isak wants to ask but Even subtly shakes his head in Isak's direction before stepping forward so that he is standing next to Isak, their hands almost touching. "How nice to see you, Bente. How are you?"

Again, Isak is at a loss. Even is blatantly lying and Isak can say for sure that he has never lied before. At least not in his presence. And it is very unsettling to see Even doing something so out of character - even his smile is faked. His stiff posture is speaking volumes, as well… but either, the stranger doesn't notice or she doesn't care because she smiles in return and extends her hand.

Even shakes her hand, inconspicuously, maybe even unconsciously, rubbing it on his jeans afterward.

While Even greets the child human, as well, the gaze of the female human lands on Isak and if he were human, Isak would probably shudder. Her gaze is cold and scrutinizing; and besides everything Even has taught him in the past weeks, he wants to immediately apologize for whatever he has done wrong in her eyes.

"And who is this?" She asks, her gaze back on Even, even though she is obviously talking about Isak.

However, Even turns towards Isak and gives him a small nod - telling him to… Isak doesn't know. He reciprocates Even's gaze and shrugs lightly. He should probably understand what is asked of him but he is absolutely clueless.

"Go on, introduce yourself," Even whispers after moving closer to Isak so that the female won't hear him.

But Isak shakes his head a little. "No, but she asked you," he replies in a normal voice since whispering isn't something his system knows how to do. "That's not according to protocol either, Even. Robots don't really talk to humans unless they're asked something. And they don't introduce themselves." Especially, since other robots didn't even have _names_ \- but Isak doesn't add that because he just got used to his name and he thinks that it's satisfying for Even that he was able to give him one.

And maybe, if he were human, Isak would even like it, too.

While Isak is overly aware of the female staring at them, Even rolls his eyes at him a little and then grins at him in that way he sometimes does. "Yeah… but I told you to, so go on and introduce yourself."

What…?

It takes Isak a moment to process what Even is saying and he struggles even more with understanding why he has said that. It's almost as if, suddenly and out of nowhere, Even wants to prove the power he has over him. But that is something so unlike Even that even Isak's probability calculations don't add up to more than 2% probability.

And there's also that smile that is slowly fading from Even's lips the longer Isak stays quiet next to him. It makes it seem more like a challenge…

Isak doesn't understand and his eyes wander from Even to the female stranger and back with insecurity.

He wants to comply to Even's request, he even wants to accept his challenge, even though it is - logically speaking - a stupid thing only humans do. But he doesn't even know how to do that at all. As in, he has literally no useful data on how to introduce himself with his name because he isn't supposed to have a name.

His system seems to be overheating with the pressure and the constant processing and he doesn't know what to do.

Logically, he knows he should stop and just tell Even no but he can't.

There is already a warning signal flashing up.

Isak feels like he will have a system crash any second now when he hears the woman speak: "Is this the robot Sonja and you bought, then?"

This comment somehow gets his system to slow down - maybe because it makes him realize that he probably won't have to introduce himself after all. The warning signal disappears and Isak can sort out the mess this almost-crash has caused while waiting for Even to reply.

"This is Isak," Even answers her, his whole body tense and his voice biting. And again, Isak is at a loss as to why. But he doesn't analyze it further because he doesn't want to overwork his system again after barely stopping a crash only seconds ago. "Well, we have to get going now, anyway. It was nice meeting you, though, Bente. See you."

And with that, Even grabs the handle of the shopping cart to wheel it away angrily.

Isak stares after him for a second before he quickly grabs toilet paper from the shelf and utters a "goodbye, Madam" under his breath before he follows Even.

He wants to ask Even about what just happened when he catches up but instead he says: "I didn't have the chance to grab the washing powder. And also the other things for Sonja… I should probably go back."

"No." Even stops and turns around to Isak. He looks weirdly gloomy and at the same time still angry. "Forget about it… I'll get it tomorrow. I'm… Isak, I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean for it to go down like this. I just thought it would be nice for you to introduce yourself and use your name… Guess I was wrong. Once again."

Quickly, Isak shakes his head. "It's okay, Even. It wasn't your fault… I just failed to introduce myself because I don't know how to."

"Huh?" Even frowns at him, leaning his head to one side. "What do you mean 'you don't know how to'?"

"I just don't have the programming to…" He stops and rethinks his words to make it easier for Even to understand. "I don't have the words, basically."

Even's face lights up with a smile - a smile very different from the grin he flashed earlier and even if he doesn't know why, it makes Isak feel a lot more at ease. "You don't have the words… I'm sorry, but… this is just… You know the most random things and can probably name at least 50 decimal digits of the number Pi but you don't have the words to introduce yourself?!"

"Because robots don't have names and don't introduce themselves to humans!"

"I know, I know…" Even holds up his hands in surrender. "But you do, so… I guess I'll have to teach you how to introduce yourself so that something like this won't happen again."

Isak shrugs and takes the cart from Even to wheel it towards the checkout, mumbling a "whatever" under his breath.

"Hey… what's up, Isak? Are you… are you sulking? Is this robot-sulking?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Even, robots don't sulk…" Isak replies while rolling his eyes at Even. He stops the cart in front of the checkout and starts putting the items onto the conveyor belt. "Are you going to help me… or?"

Even's laugh probably echoes through the whole supermarket. "Yeah, you're definitely sulking, Isak."

Nevertheless, Even starts helping him with their groceries and while they wait for everything to be scanned, he smiles widely at Isak. "You're very cute when you're sulking, though."

"I'm not…" Isak starts and then stops instantly when he realizes what Even is actually doing here. "You're just making fun of me, aren't you?"

"Clever boy," Even chuckles and extends his credit card to the cashier. "Anyway, what you can say to introduce yourself is: My name is Isak or just: I'm Isak."

Isak frowns deeply. "That's it?"

He almost had a system crash because of _this_?

***

On Saturday night, Even is already in bed, reading a book, when he hears Sonja coming back home. It's earlier than what he was expecting after getting a message from her telling him she was going out with her friends. Even is pretty sure it was meant to be payback for the night he has ditched her to get drunk with his crewmates but she doesn't need to know the truth, that he couldn't care less. On the contrary, he has spent the evening with Isak and then enjoyed some alone time with a good book, so it has pretty much been a great night for him; that is, until now.

He regrets not switching the lights off and hiding his face into his pillow to pretend to be asleep as soon as Sonja enters the bedroom, slamming the door shut, her jacket and shoes still on, looking angry. At him. Of course, she's mad at him, although he has no idea why.

"Hey. Did you have fun?" Even asks anyway, playing dumb in the vain hope she won't start yelling at him in a couple of seconds.

Sonja takes her shoes off and kicks them in a corner of the room, before taking her jacket off, too, and throwing it on the edge of the bed. "I had a great time, Even, thank you for asking," she replies in a cold and irritated tone. So she's taking the passive-aggressive road? This means bad news for him, always. "It was great until Bente told me a very strange story."

"Oh?"

She gives him a dirty look. "Don't play games with me, Even, you know exactly what it is about!"

As a matter of fact, he doesn't. He knows it must be related to his unexpected and very unwanted encounter with Bente at the supermarket a couple of days ago, but he can't figure out what would make Sonja so pissed at him. He made sure to be as polite as he's humanly possible with her friend, even if he can't stand her. He even smiled at her, for fuck's sake. He did his best! And it's not like Sonja isn't fully aware he's very close to hating her friends - not just Bente, unfortunately. Sonja has a knack for befriending the worst possible people.

Getting tired of her dramatics, Even closes his book and straightens up, sitting up against the headboard. "I have no idea what all of this is about, so could you please explain it to me?"

"Don't you dare patronizing me," she retorts immediately and Even has to hold back an exasperated sigh. "Bente told me she was at the supermarket the other day and she ran into you."

"So?"

"So?! You had no business being there when we have a robot taking care of the grocery shopping. But more importantly, what the hell were you doing there with said robot?!"

"Are you serious?!" Even starts to lose his calm, too. This is nonsense. He can't believe he's being scolded like a child for doing grocery shopping. "Last time I checked, having a damn robot doesn't prohibit me from going where I want, when I want it, with whom I want!"

"So you can't find time to have dinner with me but you have time to waste to go to the supermarket, is that right?" 

Even groans. He knew she would hold his mistake against him forever. "I said I was sorry. My phone died. My crewmates wanted to celebrate. It was an honest mistake, can you let it go already?!"

Considering how she's glaring at him, he takes it as a no. But then, all of sudden, she changes the subject and asks, "who's Isak?" 

Even pauses, debating what to say. He's pretty sure Bente already told her he has introduced their robot to her by the name _Isak_ , so she's just trying to trick him. Because of course, Sonja would find the idea of giving a proper name to their robot absurd. After all, she keeps referring to him as an "it" and not a "he"...

With a defeated sigh, he admits, "I gave him a name. Isak is his new name."

Throwing hands in the air in obvious astonishment, she resumes yelling at him. "I can't fucking believe you, Even! You gave a name to the robot? Why?! We've talked about it already, it's a machine! You can't go around and give him a name like that! He's not a child. He's not even a pet!"

"So what?! It doesn't mean Isak doesn't deserve a proper name or a minimum of respect!"

" _Deserve_ ? _Respect_ ? Are you hearing yourself?! He's not your friend, Even! He's a machine without feelings. He's the thing taking care of cleaning your dirty underwear! This is ridiculous. You're being completely ridiculous," she vociferates, walking back and forth in the room, pinching her nose the way she does when she's particularly "sick of his bullshits", to use her own words. "Do you even think about what people think? What my friends thought when Bente told them that my fiancé was having fun shopping with our robot and called him _Isak_ like a goddamn human being?!"

And of course, it's all about appearances. About Sonja being perfect to the eyes of the world as if anyone cared. About Sonja having a fiancé and never telling the truth to anyone when he can't get out of bed, always pretending that "oh, he has the flu! Don't worry, he will be okay". About them planning a wedding for the crowd, and not even for them.

The appearances. Always the most important thing in Sonja's life.

"You know what?" Even says, getting up from the bed. "If your friends are trying to humiliate you, if your own friends judge you, then maybe you should find new ones." He grabs his pillow and walks around the bed. "I'm done listening to you. I'm done being screamed at. That's enough for tonight. His name is Isak. Do whatever you want, but that's how I will call him, even in public, whether you want it or not."

"Don't be childish, Even, and where are-"

"I'm going to sleep on the couch if I'm still allowed to get out of here," he snaps at her and then opens the door.

"Fine!" She shouts after him as he's hurrying in the hallway. "Go have a sleepover with the freakin' robot, see if I care!"


	6. vi burde ha vært på film (we should have been a movie)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even decides to show his world to Isak.  
> There, Isak makes an unexpected friend, and learns something new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thank you so much for your support and your feedback <3 You can't imagine how happy it makes us every time we get a comment with your thoughts on this story!
> 
> This chapter has been particulary fun to write, and it's definitely the beginning of... something more ;)
> 
> On these words, enjoy!

After his fight with Sonja, Even had slept on the couch for two nights before he decided his back has had enough and he was ready to share a bed with his fiancée again. And although Even was more than willing to not talk about the subject of the fight ever again, Sonja couldn't help herself, so she did forbid him to use Isak's name outside the apartment, before turning her back on him, stealing all of the blanket in the process, and then switching their bedside lamp off to end the discussion.

The thing is, Even didn't protest, but he didn't agree either.

Hence his latest brilliant idea - in his own opinion, but certainly not Sonja's, who will never find out about it anyway. 

Hopefully.

Even has been busy rethinking the organization of his DVDs to differentiate the movies he has seen with Isak from the others, when Isak steps into his office. It has become a habit for Isak to come spontaneously to find him without being asked to, when Even is home, obviously, and when Isak isn't too busy himself with the tasks Sonja has given him. And Even loves it. He likes to entertain the idea that Isak enjoys his company as much as Even enjoys his, and that's why, today like some other days before, he ends up in his office.

"Hi, Isak," Even greets him with a smile thrown over his shoulder.

Isak grins back at him, and it's the kind of smile Even adores, for he considers it to be - naively or not, who knows - natural and genuine. "Hello, Even."

Since Isak doesn't seem to be in need of anything from him, Even goes back to his movies' rearrangement. For a little while, they don't speak, simply bask in the comfortable silence that sets in. At some point, Isak approaches the shelf, stepping next to Even, and slowly gets lost observing the bindings of the DVD boxes, sometimes taking one to examine the cover, and then turning it over to read the summary. A couple of times, he even shows a movie to Even, as if to let him know that it has caught his attention. Even takes notes of each of these movies: Blade Runner, Gattaca, Edward Scissorhands. He never makes any comments, pretends not to discern the pattern in Isak's choices, but he does notice. It's always about humans playing with science, trying to control life itself, and often pushing their ideas too far.

They're also about being misunderstood and treated unfairly, and Even wonders if Isak feels like that, too. 

Surprisingly, it's Isak who breaks the silence first.

"Do you have any of your movies?" He asks, turning towards him to look Even straight in the eye. Like everytime it happens, Even almost gets lost in the green of his irises. 

"Hm… Not really. I have my short movies on my computer but no DVDs. I've never directed anything that ended up on DVDs. I was only part of the crew as an assistant and I didn't keep the movies. I gave them to my parents, it made them happier than me," Even explains, hoping that his words don't sound as bitter as he feels, like every time he thinks about the fact he's almost 27 and he's still struggling with being taken seriously in the industry. Mikael keeps reminding him he's young and there is no rush, but Even can't help it. He's passionate, he has big dreams, and therefore big expectations too.

"But you're directing a movie right now?"

Right. It's a small project in the grand scheme of things but still a considerable opportunity, and he's endlessly grateful for it. It's his chance to show what he's capable of.

So Even nods in agreement. "Yes, I do. We still have three weeks of filming. And then… Weeks of editing to have it ready for the festivals deadlines."

"And then it will end up on one of these?" Isak gestures at the DVDs shelf.

Even half-smiles at his words. "Maybe. Hopefully. We will see."

Isak nods, running his fingers along the shelf, like someone would when they are deep in thoughts. Is it a robot thing, too? 

Or just an Isak thing? 

Eventually, Isak speaks again, "I hope you will show it to me someday, you know, on another movie night. I really want to see it."

It leaves Even completely taken aback. He gapes at him for far too long, surprised by Isak's statement, by his unexpected interest in his work.

Even forces himself to recover and asks, just making sure he's not reading too much into it, "you… you're curious about my work? About my movie?"

"Of course," Isak replies as if it's obvious.

And that's how Even gets his brilliant idea - an idea that would make Sonja furious with indignation, but who cares? Certainly not Even. Not anymore.

"You know what? You should come with me on set one of these days," Even suggests, beaming already at the prospect of showing his world to Isak.

"On set?"

"Yes, at work. When I'm filming. So you can see how it works, even behind the camera. Would you like that?"

The expression on Isak's face is indecipherable, like it often is, but he still ends up shrugging in a very casual way, and then he says, "yes, okay. If it makes you…" He pauses, frowning slightly as he seems to be searching for the right word. "Happy," he adds carefully in the end.

In this particular moment, the fact that Isak is using the word "happy" rather than "satisfied" is what makes him really happy, but it's probably best that he keeps it to himself.

So Even just smiles and nods in response. Isak coming with him on his movie set? It sounds like a perfect plan.

***

As soon as the door closes behind Sonja, Even gets up from his chair as well. He quickly puts his plate and mug away before turning around to Isak with maybe his broadest grin yet plastered across his face. "Are you ready, Isak?"

"Ready for what exactly?" Isak asks with a frown while putting away the remainders of his owner's breakfast.

"You're coming with me to the set today," Even explains as if they had discussed this a million times already when it's actually the first time Isak is hearing about this. Or well, not quite - he has asked Even about his current project a couple of days ago and Even has said that he would take him some day. But no one ever mentioned that this day would be today, so it is really a bit of a surprise for him.

However, he tries not to show it to Even by hiding his face behind the fridge door while putting the milk and the cheese back into the fridge. "Yeah, of course… but - when am I supposed to do all my tasks?"

Even closes the fridge door as he steps closer to Isak and smiles at him. "Don't worry about it, Isak," he reassures him quietly. "We can do the dishes together before we leave, the apartment is spotless anyway and we can do the grocery shopping on our way home tonight, okay? And if Sonja finds something to complain about anyway, I'll tell her it's all my fault. You don't have to worry about anything, okay? Good?"

"Okay, good," Isak agrees.

*

56 minutes later, they arrive on set and Isak's eyes wander around to take everything in as fast as possible. He is very eager to gather more data on Even and to see him at his workplace. It is going to be very interesting to see his owner in action.

Side by side, they walk around the studio building and towards the outdoor locations set up behind the building.

There are already a couple of humans standing around with mugs, probably just waiting for Even's arrival. One male human with long hair walks towards them from the side and holds out a mug towards Even when he comes to a halt in front of them.

Even takes the mug and smiles broadly at the other human before he turns towards Isak, his smile getting even wider (which shouldn't be possible). "Mik, this is Isak," Even introduces him. "Isak, this is my first assistant director and friend Mikael."

Isak nods quickly and flashes an automatic smile in the male human's direction while he is trying to find out why Even hasn't let him introduce himself. They have rehearsed how to introduce yourself in the past couple of days and Isak was confident that he could do it. But maybe Even wasn't?

Surprisingly, this… bothers him?! Of course, he doesn't feel anything - if he would, if he were human, he would probably feel disappointment - but still… he just doesn't understand why Even didn't let him try it out in a real scenario.

Maybe because Mikael has his hand extended towards him for a while now and Isak doesn't know what to do with it when he realizes it. And before he can think about what Even has taught him, Mikael finally drops the hand and shrugs. "Well, nice to meet you, Isak."

"Uhh… you too," he coaxes out the reply Even has taught him while his system is still busy catching up and analyzing his mistakes.

Mikael gives them another nod and then turns around to walk over to the rest of the humans standing some feet away, watching them. "It's alright, Isak," Even whispers next to him. "You did well… don't worry."

"I don't worry, Even," he snaps back and turns to Even to roll his eyes at him. "Why didn't you let me introduce myself? We rehearsed it, I can do it now!"

Even frowns at him, worrying his lip. "I'm sure you can do it, Isak… I just didn't want to overwhelm you again like in the supermarket. So, when Mikael came over without any warning, I didn't want to… You can introduce yourself to the other guys if you want?!" Even points to the group of about seven humans and Isak looks at them with big eyes. That's not what they've practiced, though. How do you introduce yourself to more than one person at the same time? "It's okay, Isak… we can do it another time."

"Yeah… maybe another time is better," Isak says. "I'm not adequately prepared for this."

Even who has just taken a sip from his coffee, splutters. His laughters are interrupted by coughing and Isak raises his eyebrows at his owner in confusion. "Sorry… are you saying I'm a bad teacher? Is that what you're saying?"

"What? No! I didn't say that at all, Even. I said I'm not adequately prepared for this. How did you make this to be 'you're a bad teacher' in your head? Maybe I should make an appointment with an ENT specialist for you because there has to be something wrong with your hearing."

"Oh, Isak…" Even snorts and then just continues to smile at Isak. "Anyway… let's meet the crew, shall we?" 

Isak nods quickly but before they can even get a move on, a loud, bright ball of color bounces towards them and pulls Even into a long, bone-crushing hug. It takes Isak several seconds to realize that this is another male human wearing bright, colorful clothes and with flashy makeup on his face and around his eyes.

Warily, he observes the interchange between his owner and the other human. Even reciprocates the hug and pats the male human's back. "Hey, Eskild," he greets and slowly pushes the other man off him. "What's up? Everything good?"

"Yeah, yeah…" The male human - Eskild? - has already moved his focus away from Even and is now looking at Isak, his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open, as if he is about to scream any second now. And he almost does. "Who is this absolute cutie, Even? Why have I never seen him before? Oh my God, look at him. _Look_ at him!"

Isak looks from the stranger to Even, hoping to find some kind of help from his owner - because he doesn't understand what is happening. Not at all, not one thing that is coming out of this male human's mouth makes any kind of sense to him and he doesn't know what to do.

Even grins at him. "He's talking about you."

"What?" Isak's frown gets deeper and his eyes wander back to Eskild who is still looking at him excitedly and expectantly. "I don't understand… Why would he say things like that about me? What does it even mean?"

"It means that he thinks you're cute," Even laughs. "But don't worry about it. I will keep him busy enough, so he can't come on too strong."

For some seconds, Isak has to ponder on that, then he shakes his head. "But I'm a robot, Even, I'm not cute."

It's Eskild that intervenes this time, _tsk_ -ing, "of course, you're fucking cute, Isak. You are basically the cutest thing walking around this set since we started filming. No offence, Even, you know you're very pretty."

"Thank you, Eskild." Even winks and then turns to Isak. "It's okay, Isak, really… don't worry about him. He's just like that with everyone, you know?"

The frown slowly disappears from Isak's face and he takes a step forward, towards Eskild, and extends his hand to him. "Hello, Eskild. My name is Isak. It's very nice to meet you."

Eskild screeches as he shakes Isak's hand. "Oh my… He's adorable. You should bring your friend to set more often, Even."

Isak recoils a little upon hearing the high pitched sound; afraid that he has done something wrong, he looks at Even. He has said everything exactly as Even has taught him, so it can't be wrong. Even smiles at him reassuringly, almost proud and… happy. Yes, as far as Isak has learnt to understand this emotion, he'd say that Even looks happy. "That was really good, Isak. Now you can introduce yourself to the rest of the guys, too."

"Why do you keep calling them guys, Even?" Isak asks as they walk towards the group of humans. There are three female humans in that group. "They are not all male… so that is very inaccurate of you."

"No, Isak, look it up in that big brain of yours how humans use the word," Even retorts with a grin and a little wink.

Isak growls a little but starts a research nevertheless, while he corrects Even, "I don't have a brain, Even. I'm not a human. I have a motherboard, CPU, software and a connection to the internet…"

Even dismisses his objection. "Yeah, but that _is_ your brain. Same thing, different words. And now come on… let's meet the rest of the crew."

While Even crosses the last bit of distance, Isak stops in his tracks to process what Even has just told him. Because even though, he wants to tell Even that he is wrong, he has to admit that he isn't really. It's a very human way of looking at it but it's not exactly wrong - the things Isak has listed are the robot equivalent to a human brain.

So, instead, he takes a deep breath and then follows Even to the crew. Before coming to a halt, the automatic smile appears on his lips and he nods in their direction. "Hello, guys, I'm Isak. Nice to meet you."

Everyone comes up to him to shake his hand and introduce themselves to Isak who is trying to memorize all of the names and to put the name with the according face to his RAM.

There's Elias, the quiet but confident director of photography, who is the same age as Even and seems to be a rather close friend of him. There is the quirky set designer Vilde with her long blonde hair and her broad, welcoming smile, the costume designer Eva with reddish hair and curious big eyes, and the assistant Linn who seems lethargic, almost depressed, and who is already being commanded around by Eskild. And lastly, there's a stuntman called Jonas who seems to think he's the coolest human on earth.

All of them greet Isak and then go on to treat him like he's just one of Even's friends coming along on set to hang out with him.

It's weird - but also kind of nice.

***

Taking Isak with him on set has been going very well so far. 

Even was worried that Isak would quickly feel overwhelmed by his team, by all these new faces, but once again Isak is surprising him. Rather than withdrawing, he seems determined to blend in with the crew, introducing himself perfectly and keeping up with the discussions, like taking on a challenge. If Isak were a human, Even is pretty sure he would be a very competitive guy.

"Will you be okay while I'm working?" Even asks Isak anyway when his crew starts to notice the time and scatters around the set, slowly getting ready for the first shooting sequence of the day. 

Isak rolls his eyes at him - literally! - and Even wonders from where this new bratty, sassy attitude is coming, although he doesn't hate it one bit. It's quite endearing, to be honest. "I will do fine on my own, Even."

"And he won't be alone, I can keep him company!" Eskild intervenes out of nowhere, sliding to Isak's side with unbridled excitement, eyes staring at Isak.

Right. Eskild's scenes aren't scheduled before a couple of hours so he has nothing else to do than hanging out with Isak if he wants to. He doesn't even know why his actor is here this early, but that's not exactly an unusual thing coming from Eskild. Just like it isn't abnormal from him to take such an interest in Isak, he does it all the time with newbies, for he loves calling himself their "guru". On set, Eskild became like a mother or brother figure, depending on who you ask; and he doesn't have a single malicious bone in his body, even if he's making Linn run (or well, more like drag her feet, since she would never in a million years actually run) everywhere on set for him. 

Isak is safe with him. 

And yet, Even feels weirdly anxious leaving him alone with him. Maybe because his actor is so naturally over-the-top and probably wouldn't notice Isak being uncomfortable. It went so well until now, he doesn't want Isak's efforts to be ruined by an excessive enthusiasm on Eskild's part, even if it comes from the best of intentions.

"Eskild! Don't forget we have some final touch-ups to do on your outfit before this afternoon's scene!" Eva yells at him from the other side of the set, interrupting Even's train of thoughts.

"Ugh, don't be a party pooper, Eva!" Eskild dismisses her with his signature dramatic voice. Eva huffs before walking away in the direction of the dressing room. "No costume of mine needs fixing because everything fits me," Eskild tells Isak, winking at him as if they are sharing an inside joke.

Isak stares back at him in confusion.

"Even! Time to start!" He hears Mikael calling him. He checks his watch and, fuck, alright, they are already ten minutes late on their schedule. 

"I have to go but come to me if you need to, I don't mind, okay?" Even says, not moving before Isak nods back at him in agreement.

"Yes. Okay. But I will be fine," Isak repeats, looking perfectly confident.

Even still doesn't know how he feels about leaving Isak alone with Eskild, or anyone, really, but he doesn't have much of a choice, so he runs after Mikael and gets ready on set, taking his seat behind the camera and checking Elias' work, making sure the frame and the light are just like he wanted it. 

From his spot, he can see Isak and Eskild talking in the background, far away enough so they can't disturb the scene being filmed, but close enough that Even can keep an eye on them. 

"Even, you're ready?" Mikael asks, forcing him to turn his attention back to the set. 

His actors and actresses are ready already, his crew is out of the frame and waiting for his instructions. Even puts his headphones on and tries to stay focused on the screen of the camera. 

"I'm ready," he says, followed by a few words for the actors and actresses on the set, and then, "lights, camera, action!"

His good resolutions don't last very long, though. Soon, his eyes drift from the set to Isak, who's still with Eskild. And what he sees takes him completely off-guard. 

At first, it's mostly Eskild ranting and Isak staring at him in silence, looking utterly lost. But at least he doesn't seem to be having another robot meltdown like that time in the supermarket, so Even tries not to worry too much. Eskild can be confusing, even for humans.

But then, Isak starts to talk, too. Eskild's monologue slowly morphs into an actual conversation, where Isak is taking a part in it and he doesn't look that behind anymore. And for a while, Even feels relieved and happy for Isak that he's comfortable enough to have a discussion with another human who isn't Even. Two months ago, it would have been unthinkable. Two months ago, Isak didn't dare say a word without being asked something or without it being about his tasks.

Even is happy for him. He is, until he sees Isak smile back at Eskild and he recognizes his genuine smile, the smile he's ever only used on Even so far. And he isn't proud of himself for the way it makes him feel - possessive, selfish, like Isak belongs to him and… Alright, he does belong to him, technically. But he has never felt the need for Isak to belong to him, on the contrary, he has always wanted him to feel like he was more than what his functions were dictating him.

And here he is now, with an ugly part of him wishing Isak would only use his sincere, real smile on him.

"Even? Are you with us?" Mikael brings him back to reality, to his set full of his crewmates, who are all looking back at him in question.

"Hm, what?"

"I was asking if you wanted to try the other angle we've talked about yesterday," Elias speaks next.

"Huh. Yeah. Yes. Let's try it," Even mumbles, ashamed of himself, but not sure exactly for what reason - his unprofessional behavior or his previous thoughts.

It doesn't stop Even from looking up at Isak and Eskild, _again_ , to see Isak laugh at whatever his actor is telling him. _Laugh_. Isak is laughing, and Even is positive it never happened before. He would remember. Surely he would remember the sound of Isak's laugh, the way he throws his head back and how his adorable cheek dimples are showing.

Why does Isak never laugh with him? Why does he with a complete stranger?

"Like this?" Elias asks. Once again, Even realizes he's been too distracted. He didn't even notice that Elias has made the necessary camera adjustment and has been waiting for him to approve.

"It's good," Mikael answers for him, and then throws him his special best friend _what the fuck is up with you_ look.

"Yeah. Perfect. Thanks," Even adds to pretend he's not completely out of it.

After that, Even manages to remain focused on his job for about ten minutes, and then he's back at glancing at Isak from afar. 

And it's only gotten worse. Because now Eskild is touching Isak and Isak doesn't seem bothered by it. He doesn't even flinch. Maybe he did, at first, when Even wasn't looking, but now, he's clearly 100% comfortable with everything Eskild says and does. And Even hates himself for feeling this way, for feeling so… _Jealous_ , because that's exactly what this is, he's feeling jealous that Eskild gets to be so friendly with Isak when Even never got this far with him. And it isn't fair at all. Even has no right to feel this way. 

And yet, he can't control it. Here is he, acting like a jealous prick.

"Alright, let's take a 10 minutes break!" Mikael announces all of sudden, which means Even fucked up. Again.

His crewmates slowly clear the set to go get coffees. Mikael doesn't move though, waits for people to leave before speaking to him, "what's up with you, dude?!"

"I- I'm tired, I guess. I can't stay focused," he half-lies. He really doesn't want Mikael to figure out he's been distracted by Isak, because then he would need to explain to his best friend why he even cares about his robot laughing with Eskild, and it's not a conversation Even is ready to have. With him, or anyone else. Not even himself.

"Is it… Do you need a day off?" Mikael asks carefully.

"No," Even retorts immediately, like a reflex. "It's fine. We can't take more delay. We need to keep going."

Mikael studies his face for a while before he starts beaming at him, "you know what? I'm fine stealing your job. If you want to be a lazy bitch today, you do you. I will do the work for your useless ass."

Even huffs, but smiles back at him. His best friend is the best person he knows, and by far. Only he would see right through his lies and yet not push, not guilt-trip him into telling the truth. Only he would let him get away with his annoying, unprofessional behavior and joke about it to ease the mood. 

Only he would have his back no matter what.

"Be my guest, then. So I can take a nap while you terrorize my crew," Even teases back, and for a moment, forgetting about Isak and Eskild in the background.

"Lies! They love me! And for the record, they think I'm a better director than you are," Mikael counterbacks.

Even smirks. "You wish!"

When the break is over, everybody goes back to work. But before they start filming again, Even allows himself one last tormented look at Isak.

And this time, Isak isn't smiling or laughing with Eskild. 

This time, Isak is already looking back at Even, and he waves at him with a shy grin.

Despite his internal turmoil, it's enough for Even to focus for the rest of the shooting day.

***

Once Even is gone, Isak loses a bit of his confidence - that he has mostly put up for Even's sake anyway. Because this is the first time he is ever alone with another human being that isn't one of his owners. And, quite frankly, this man is probably one of the strangest, most flamboyant humans on Earth.

Isak isn't sure how he is supposed to deal with him.

For a while, he is looking after Even as he walks away and takes his seat behind a screen, but then he realizes Eskild is talking to him and he turns around towards the male human in front of him in order to not be rude.

It takes him a couple of seconds to tune in and grasp the topic of Eskild's monologue that he has probably started as soon as Even walked away from them.

Eventually, Isak realizes that Eskild is talking about his career and has now moved on to his current role in Even's movies. That's when Isak sees his chance to interject and be part of the conversation - because that's what he's supposed to do, right? "What exactly is the movie about?"

"Oh, Even hasn't told you?" Eskild asks, before continuing his monologue without stopping for a breath. "It's a sci-fi movie about a time traveller and his love for an alien. That's me, I'm the alien! Cool, huh? And let me tell you, I make an amazing alien… So, anyway, this time traveller - played by this super sexy guy Anders - is travelling through time, space and also parallel universes to find his lover who he met during one of his missions on an unknown planet far, far away. But he lost him again after a battle with some bad guys… So, now his only mission is to find his one true love again."

Isak frowns a little while processing the information but eventually he nods. "A movie about love then. Sounds exactly like something Even would make."

"It does, doesn't it?" Eskild grins at him and Isak returns the smile genuinely while thinking about Even doing what he loves most and pouring his heart and soul into this movie. Since that is exactly the kind of human being his owner is and Isak is very satisfied that he can also be this person at his job.

At his job that he loves so much and is so passionate about. Quickly, Isak throws another glance towards Even - but his owner is busy looking at the screen in front of him. From what Isak has gathered from his research and what Even has told him, he can see the scene acted out by his actors like the viewers will later on.

Even is very focused, his body tense and slightly bent forward in his chair as if to get a closer view. He looks like he is almost completely absorbed in his work.

It's fascinating how humans can be like this. It's very foreign to Isak who is used to doing several things at a time and who thinks it would be really helpful to have more than just two hands.

"You really like him, huh?"

Isak is so surprised by Eskild's voice right next to him that he almost loses his balance while turning around to him. "I… what?"

Once again, Eskild's face lights up with a smile. But it's a different smile… a smile that says that he knows something that Isak doesn't - which is basically impossible, since he can look up anything on the web or his databases within seconds. "Even, you like him," Eskild repeats eventually.

"No, I don't," Isak huffs. Why would Eskild even think that robots can like anything? It's a ridiculous thought! He can't believe he has to explain this to him! "Robots don't like anything because they don't feel things…" He pauses and thinks for a second before budging just a little. "He is, however, a very pleasant and nice owner if that is what you're asking."

Eskild's grin gets impossibly brighter and he nods multiple times. "Yeah, you like him, baby robot."

Eskild is the weirdest human ever, that is for sure. But strangely enough, Isak thinks it is… interesting; and if he were human, he would like to have a friend like Eskild.

"You're strange," Isak blurts out. "And there are no baby robots. Robots are created, so they're fully functional once they're activated."

"I'm strange???" Eskild looks at him in mock-outrage. "Coming from a robot with a name that's really something…"

For seconds, Isak stares at him with his mouth ajar, trying to process - and then the strangest thing ever happens.

He laughs.

He laughs at Eskild's, not even funny or clever, jab as if he were a human. And he can't really stop.

Eventually, he calms down and blushes a light pink. What the hell was that and where did it come from?

"Wow, you're even cuter when you laugh, baby robot," Eskild notes and his hand lands on Isak's arm, squeezing it tightly.

Confused, Isak flinches for a second but then stops to stare at the hand, trying to process what it is doing there and what it does to him.

No one has ever touched him. Well, of course, people have grazed him when they walked past him and someone once shoved him on his way to the supermarket but nobody has ever touched him on purpose, not even Even.

His sensors tell him that the touch is soft and warm and… comforting? At least, that's what his system tells him.

Isak tilts his head to look up at Eskild, smiling at him again. "Well, thank you, Eskild," he says instead of correcting him for his mistake. "You're maybe strange but you're also very nice."

"Awwwwww." Eskild is squealing again and his hand is now stroking up Isak's arm to squeeze his shoulder instead. "My god, we're gonna be really good friends, baby robot. I just know it."

***

When Even picks Isak up after his day of shooting, it's like he doesn't know how to act with him anymore. It gets even worse when Eskild shows up again, running to catch up with them as they are walking on the parking lot in the direction of Even's car, and gives Isak a piece of paper.

Isak takes it by reflex but stares at Eskild in question for the longest time, until Eskild takes the hint. "My number," he clarifies with a wink. "Give me a call if you ever need to talk - about anything, really. Don't hesitate."

If Even didn't know his actor better than this, he would think he's hitting on Isak. But once again, it's a very normal, platonic thing for Eskild to do so he sucks it up and stands still as they say goodbye to each other.

"I'm looking forward to seeing you again, you cute little thing," Eskild says, smirking at him, and Isak huffs.

"Bye, Eskild!" He adds, rolling his eyes at him _too_ , a smile on his face, making it clear he's neither uncomfortable nor really annoyed by the actor's dramatics. 

If anything, they both look like long-time friends. And it happened in just a few hours, while Even has been struggling to build whatever this is between them now for weeks, basically months. And Isak has never looked _that_ at ease with him the way he is with Eskild.

"Okay, let's go," Even sighs once they are done teasing each other.

"See you tomorrow, handsome!" Eskild throws back at Even, thankfully blind to how upset he is internally.

Even nods and forces a smile before walking away with Isak by his side. They get in the car and Even is weirdly relieved to leave, although it only lasts a couple of minutes.

Because soon, all he can think about is how unfair he's being. He has no right to be jealous. He should be happy about Isak's improvements and he should be excited about him making a new friend, especially someone like Eskild, who is nothing like Isak. 

But Even can't help but wonder: what if he's been doing things wrong from the start and he's been only delaying Isak's growth? What if the only reason he's been awkward and so _robot-like_ in the first place is because Even was the one making him insecure? This is how it all started after all, right? Even couldn't find a proper way to communicate with Isak. But Eskild? In a matter of minutes, he was making Isak smile, laugh, even banter with him.

"Even, are you okay?" Isak asks from the passenger seat. 

Even looks at him quickly from the corner of his eyes and he sees how Isak is frowning at him, like, maybe, he has noticed Even's mood and he's worried about it. His question seems to imply he does, too.

"Yeah, just tired from work," Even lies. There is no way he can tell Isak the truth, it would ruin everything. 

"Are you sure?" Isak insists.

Are robots supposed to be this good at reading humans' emotions? Since when is _Isak_ this good at it? How much did Even miss these past few weeks, when he was too busy being selfish and self-centred, caring more about showing his favorite DVDs to Isak than to actually get to know him?

Is it what he's been doing? Treating Isak like his property, like his own entertainment? And not like a person?

Even feels completely lost.

"It was interesting, visiting your workplace," Isak talks again, so Even tries to listen. It's the least he can do after everything.

"Yeah?"

"Sure. Your co-workers are nice."

And of course Even can't help himself, he has to be a dick and says, "you spent a lot of time with Eskild. Do you like him?"

Isak doesn't answer right away, probably because "liking" someone is something foreign for him. "Robots don't like people, it would mean we have feelings in the first place, and obviously we don't," he corrects him eventually. _Right_. Of course. "But he was nice, too."

At the last second, Even holds himself back from asking if Isak finds him _nice_ too. He's being ridiculous. He feels so ashamed for his behavior that he can barely focus on Isak's small talk, which just makes his guilt even worse. Isak is trying so hard all the time, but what is Even even doing? 

So Even keeps his eyes on the road and doesn't talk for the rest of the ride, just nodding at Isak's comments about his day on set.

***

The apartment is quiet when they return home, so Sonja must be at work still or out with her friends. And Isak is pretty thankful for it, since it means that she will probably never know about him spending the day with Even and not cleaning the flat.

However, he doesn't ponder on it for too long before his thoughts rush back to Even and his weird behavior in the car.

His owner has been absent, quiet and just generally acting out of character for the most part of their ride home and Isak doesn't understand why. He thought him being on set with Even is something that would make him happy. But apparently, judging from Even's behavior ever since, he has been wrong?!

The worst part, however, is that he just can't figure out why. From his point of view, everything has been going just fine. He managed to introduce himself, everyone has been very nice to him, treating him more like a human than a robot (which, admittedly, is still a little confusing to him) and he got along perfectly with Eskild. As far as he can enjoy things as a robot, Isak has very much appreciated his day on set.

So, why is Even upset about it? Has he done something wrong without realizing it? Has someone from the crew complained about him to Even?

And no matter how many times Even repeats his lie that he is just tired from work, Isak knows it's not the truth. He has become very good at reading Even after studying him for two months; he knows when his owner is lying to his face.

Maybe it isn't even his fault, maybe something else has happened on set? Maybe something went wrong during the shooting of a scene?

Whatever it is… Even is clearly upset and Isak has to change it. It's his basic function to keep his owners satisfied - or happy, how Even likes to call it. So, Even being unhappy means he's failed and has to better. Otherwise he might be returned and - even though, Isak knows he has no right to this and that he shouldn't think things like that - it's not something he particularly wants.

He wants to stay with Even.

Suddenly, his mind goes back to his conversation with Eskild and he remembers the way the actor has touched his arms and his shoulders.

It has felt… agreeable. Eventually, Isak has found out - with the help of a little web research - that it was meant to be comforting. And maybe he has felt that a little bit, as well. It is a ridiculous thought because he doesn't have feelings… but still, there was something there when Eskild touched him.

And that's also, how he gets an idea how to help Even… if Eskild's touch has already elicit something like this in him, then surely Even would be a lot more responsive to a little touch, right?

Quickly, he makes his way over to Even who is sitting at the kitchen table eating some fast food they have picked up on their way home since Isak wasn't able to cook today.

Even is so lost in his own head, he doesn't even notice him, doesn't look up when Isak stands right next to him. But maybe that's actually to his advantage as he is very unsure of how to do this.

Once Isak is standing so close that he's almost touching Even with his body, he stops and outstreches his arm.

Almost confused, he looks at his fingers and moves them a little in front of his eyes before he slowly lowers his hand onto Even's upper arm. The fabric of his shirt is soft under his fingers and when his hand is laying completely on Even's biceps, he can feel the heat of his owner's skin under his fingers.

It takes exactly 21 seconds for Even to realize that something is different.

Puzzled, he looks up from his plate and almost jumps as he sees Isak right next to him. "Jeez, you scared me," he mumbles and comes to a stuttering halt when his eyes land on Isak's hand on his upper arm.

Isak pulls his hand away immediately feeling his system heating up a little, a blush probably rising on his face - as it is programmed to when he gets caught doing something he shouldn't have been doing.

He wants to look away but is too anxious to see if it worked.

Even is still staring at his upper arm, his blue eyes big and his mouth gaping. He seems to be even more distraught then before and Isak is about to apologize when suddenly, Even's whole demeanor changes within a millisecond.

His eyes are sparkling and his lips are stretched into the brightest, widest smile ever.

Now he looks happy again. And Isak is rather proud of himself for causing this happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... what did you think of Isak getting to know new people?  
> In particular, Isak meeting Eskild, our favorite guru?  
> What are your thoughts on jealous Even?  
> And of course, THEIR FIRST TOUCH? What do you think is going to happen next?
> 
> Have a nice week-end <3


	7. jeg vil aldri danse med noen andre (I never want to dance with anyone else)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Even and Isak decide to watch "Dirty Dancing" together, it ignites something in them that eventually leads to a big step forward for Isak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being a bit late today... we basically just finished this chapter right now because we were rather busy with work and uni this week. We hope, it turned out nicely anyway (and if you see any errors ignore them ksjsfjj)...  
> And once again, thank you so much for all your lovely comments - be they short or long, screaming or analyzing, we love them all a whole lot. Thank you, really! <3

Another night spent without Sonja home means another movie night with Isak; it became their daily routine. After the first time Even told Isak he could choose the movie, they decided to take turns. Even loved analyzing the reasons why Isak would pick a movie and not another while Isak had shown more and more curiosity about movies, so it made perfect sense.

Tonight, it's Even's turn, and of course, he picked another iconic rom-com classic: Dirty Dancing.

What he didn't expect though, is how interested and intrigued Isak would be. Before pressing play, he was so sure the robot would spend the entire movie pointing out all the characters' seemingly irrational or reckless behavior, like he always does, or questioning the very purpose of dancing in the first place, calling it silly, among other things; and yet. 

Once again, Isak surprises him.

"Can dance really bring people together like this?" Isak asks after they've spent half an hour discussing the subject of social class differences the movie was also about.

It was probably not something Isak had noticed, but Even obviously did: how robots today were treated like the staff from Dirty Dancing, like Johnny, like Penny and many others. When he thinks back to Sonja's words, who states Isak's worthlessness as evidence, how could he not draw a parallel with the resort's owner or some of the guests? 

Deep down, Even hopes he's closer to being someone like Baby than any of the "bad guys" from the movie.

"Of course. Dancing is something we can all do. Alone. With someone else. With friends. With strangers," Even replies. "Sure, most people can't dance the way Baby and Johnny do, because it takes practice and… well, you probably already know that. But it's still dancing."

"I don't know that, actually," Isak argues, a slight crease forming between his two eyebrows as he starts frowning, deep in thoughts.

"Oh."

Even could slap himself. Of course, Isak doesn't know, how could he? Robots don't dance. Not robots like him, in any case.

"Do you like it? Dancing?" Isak asks anyway, unbothered by Even's clumsy comment.

"It's nice, sometimes." _Especially drunk_ , he thinks but decides not to say it. "With the right person, it can be very, very nice, actually."

Even tries to remember the last time Sonja and him have danced together, but his mind is blank. Surely they did in the past, at parties, but it's probably been years since the last time they did. On the other hand, he can tell when they would have to dance together again: on their wedding day.

The idea doesn't thrill him one bit. Which seems to be a pattern when it's related in any way to his wedding with Sonja… 

"Do you know how to dance?" Isak keeps on going with his questions. When Even glances at him, he looks genuinely curious. 

"I know some moves. But nothing like in the movie. I'm actually pretty bad at it," Even chuckles. His body is too tall and uncoordinated for him to do much with it. He also has the reputation of stepping on his partners' feet while dancing - Sonja has complained about it way too many times back in the day.

"I'm sure you're great," Isak retorts with a small, shy smile that goes straight to Even's heart.

 _This boy_. He deserves everything and he doesn't even know it.

"Would _you_ like to know how to dance?" Even asks then, half-joking, expecting Isak to brush it off with a "robots don't dance", but Isak stays silent a bit too long and that's what makes Even realize that, maybe, Isak's curiosity goes beyond the need of gathering general information about dance and about his owner.

What if…

Smiling at the simple idea of what he's about to do, Even stands up, grabs his phone and scrolls into his music app until he finds the most iconic song from Dirty Dancing, _(I've Had) The Time of My Life_. Isak looks up at him in confusion, and his incredulity increases even more when Even extends his hand in invitation, and all smiles, repeats the famous line from the movie; 

"Nobody puts Baby in a corner."

Isak stares back at him in disbelief, rolling his eyes at him, but after a while, he gives up. He slides his hand into Even's and lets him pull him up until they are both standing up, in front of each other, in the middle of the living room.

It doesn't go unnoticed to Even, the fact it's the second time they are touching (he still can't believe it came from Isak first, a few days ago), and the first time they are holding hands.

"What do I do?" Isak asks, utterly lost.

Even can see and _feel_ how tense Isak's body is, and he knows it's not exactly a human body, but still, he's pretty sure he has seen Isak more comfortable than this in the past. 

"Relax. It's fine," Even whispers before grabbing Isak's other hand, too. If they really want to try dancing, they are going to have to get even closer than this, to touch more than this, but he doesn't want to rush things.

It's all so new, and he isn't sure how Isak would react just yet.

***

Isak is not quite sure how they ended up like this - standing in the middle of the living room, holding hands, ready to dance - after another one of their movie nights. All he knows is that he has asked a question like he usually does during movies and that they've talked about dancing and suddenly, they are here.

And he has no idea what he is supposed to do.

So, while he is watching the final dance scene from the movie on YouTube again, he simultaneously searches up the basic Mambo steps on Google. It doesn't look too complicated actually - at least until Isak realizes the instructions are for a female and a male partner and that depending on which partner you are, you have to either start with your left or your right foot.

But there was no female partner here, so which foot should he be starting with?

When Even starts to move, it's an absolute disaster - of course. Isak steps on Even's foot and then stumbles over his own feet, almost making both of them fall. Even catches him just in time before he actually falls and puts him in an upright position again.

Isak blushes a deep red due to his mistakes and quickly apologizes. "No, it's not your fault at all, Isak," Even counters and takes his hands again. "It's not easy to dance with someone for the first time… We'll have to figure out how to do things and where our feet go. Plus, we're both very tall, so it's extra hard, I guess."

"U-hu." Isak sounds pretty unconvinced but he nods anyway and gets back into a straight position again. "Then let's try again, okay? Just tell me if I'm supposed to be the female or the male partner."

There's silence and when Isak looks up, he finds Even frowning at him in confusion, his mouth moving but without words coming out. So, Isak feels inclined to add: "It's because which foot moves first… I don't want to keep stepping on your feet. I know that neither one of us is female, Even. You're male and I don't have a gender though I'm built to look like a male human… So, which foot first?"

"Wait, what?" Even sputters and lets their hands sink down, although not letting go of Isak's hand. "You don't?"

"Obviously not, Even, I'm a robot," Isak explains with a slight roll of his eyes.

While he has come to appreciate that Even, contrary to Sonja, treats him like a human, like a friend and not like a robot (or well, in Sonja's case, probably almost like a slave), Isak just doesn't understand why Even thinks he actually _is_ like a human. He is a robot and he will always be a robot, no matter how much he looks like a human, no matter how much Even and his friends treat him like one.

Even bits his lip and then nods, bringing their hands back up. "Yeah, of course… Alright, how about you start with your right foot and I'll start with the left?"

"Alright."

After they tried (and failed) over and over again - sometimes it's Isak stepping on Even's foot, sometimes it's the other way round, sometimes neither of them can remember what to do next or they mix up the sequence of the steps or they just completely miss the beat -, Isak eventually gets so frustrated that he lets go of Even's hands.

"This is a waste of time," he huffs at Even who is looking at him in apprehension. "It obviously isn't working."

A shadow moves over Even's eyes but disappears so quickly that Isak isn't quite sure if he actually saw it. And he doesn't really know what it means either. Maybe Even was disappointed in him? Because he couldn't make it work?

Sonja is probably way better at dancing than him.

"Yeah, alright… maybe it's time to go to bed anyway," Even whispers, wringing his hands as if he doesn't know what to do with them anymore, now that they are not holding Isak's any longer. "It was fun trying, though, wasn't it?"

Isak tilts his head to the side and frowns. "Yeah, it was fun," he eventually caves to Even's human description of it.

***

The memories of Isak's and his failed attempt at dancing followed him all week long, heavy on his mind, sending him in yet another state of questionnement. 

It was supposed to be a new and fun thing to try with Isak, but it had quickly turned into a disaster. Even didn't have any expectations in the first place. How could he? He sucked at dancing himself. It really hasn't even been about being perfect, not at all. Isak, on the other hand, seemed to have taken it very seriously, so much that Even had seen the frustration looming on his face as they kept failing to coordinate until it had become too much for Isak and he had stopped the whole thing. It made Isak sad and insecure, Even could tell, and that's all he could think about afterward. How, once again, his actions have made Isak unhappy.

That's finally the reason why he has decided to release his crew early and to drive himself home, hours before Sonja is meant to come back, too. He was hoping to make Isak forget about their failure, erase that stupid idea he had gotten of making him dance, and focus on something else - something that wouldn't hurt Isak, something in his comfort zone.

When Even steps inside his apartment, though, and walks into the living room and then the kitchen, he's surprised not to find Isak around. He tries the bedroom and the bathroom, thinking maybe Isak is taking care of the laundry like he usually does in the afternoon, but no such luck. Both rooms are empty as well.

So where the hell is Isak?!

Worry starts to rise inside him, as different scenarios, each more disastrous than the other, pop up in his mind (is Isak gone? did he scare Isak away?!). As a last hope, he goes back to the kitchen to inspect the fridge and the cupboards, trying to convince himself that maybe Isak went grocery shopping, although he knows full well that he did so two days ago and that it is therefore very unlikely that he went back again today. Without surprise, the fridge and the cupboards are pretty much full.

Even is on the verge of giving in to complete panic when he hears a dull sound coming from the other end of the apartment, followed by a burst of voice - a groan, perhaps?

He's definitely not alone in his apartment, and it can only be Isak.

Even lets out a sigh of relief. Isak didn't leave him. 

But where is he then?

The only room Even hasn't thought of inspecting is his office. He didn't, because he has managed to convince Isak a long time ago that his office didn't need to be cleaned up by him, that it's something Even would rather do himself - not because he doesn't trust Isak's abilities, of course not, but because Even likes his organized mess, and he hates it more than anything else when other people touch any of his stuff. Even Sonja isn't allowed inside his office. Isak is, actually, the only other person he has allowed inside it ever since Sonja and him have moved in years ago.

If Sonja knew, he would never hear the end of it.

(And maybe she would be right to be mad at him, for treating Isak differently, for treating him better than he treats her, but that's a subject he's still not ready to deal with, so he decides to ignore it once more.)

So his office. That's where his legs take him next.

Even immediately notices how the door of his office is slightly ajar, whilst he always makes sure to shut it when he's out. After taking careful steps towards it, he stops right in front of it and takes a look inside through the slight opening of the door.

That's when he sees Isak, standing in the middle of the room, not cleaning, not tidying, not touching anything… but dancing. Isak is _dancing_.

Or at least, he's trying to, judging by the frustrated sigh Isak lets out as he trips on his own feet and therefore is stopped mid-movement. He runs a shaky hand through his hair, pushing away the wild curls falling on his forehead, and then his gaze seems absent for several long seconds. When he comes back to himself, he starts tapping his foot on the ground, like trying to count the beat of a song, and Even finally gets it. 

He's not only currently looking at Isak practicing some dance moves: he's witnessing Isak making researches, watching tutorial videos online, and he has been doing so for who knows how long! 

_Why?_ Even can't believe what he's seeing right in front of him. Why would Isak even bother doing it? Why would he neglect his housework (not that Even cares, obviously not, but it's usually something Isak cares about _a lot_ ) for watching dancing tutorials online? Is he doing it for himself? Out of competitiveness and stubbornness? Or, Even dares to think for half-second, is Isak doing it for _him_? Does he think it's something important to Even, for them to dance together?

Sadly, unless he asks all those questions to Isak, Even won't get any answer. But the thing is, interrupting Isak in the middle of his practice is the last thing he wants. Isak, who's so focused on his work that he still hasn't noticed Even standing outside, in the narrow gap of the door. Isak, who's mesmerizing to watch, with his curls flying everywhere, his serious and determined expression, and his body moving quite clumsily, but still beautifully, all of this inside _his_ office.

Even enjoys every second of it, and so he remains there, admiring him in silence, at least for a little while.

***

Isak is frustrated.

He doesn't care that it is impossible for him to feel anything, even frustration. He is fucking frustrated and he has no clue what to do about it.

After watching several hours worth of YouTube videos on dancing and reading just as many articles, he's none the wiser. Because every time he tries to reproduce what he has read or seen, he stumbles over his own feet or forgets what step comes next. It's like he's missing something but he just can't see what it is.

And that's probably what's frustrating him the most - not that he can't do it but rather that he can't figure out _why_ he can't do it.

It is so strange - because he _knows_ he got the basics and the theoretics. And yet, here he is incapable of putting them into action. It's as if there is some sort of secret ingredient that he is missing as if all these people purposely forgot to mention one specific piece of information that is needed to make dancing work.

But he has searched the whole web, there is no hint about this secret ingredient.

Almost as if everyone knows what it is, as if it is taken for granted and nobody, not even newbies, need to be taught in it.

Well - nobody but Isak, apparently.

So, the moment he finds the piece of paper with Eskild's number in his jeans pocket before putting them into the hamper, Isak gets an idea.

Because if he can't find a solution to this problem, it probably means that it is something very human. An from what he has gathered on Eskild, he is the most humanly human possible.

Conclusion: Eskild knows what is missing.

Isak quickly finishes sorting the laundry and, after he has turned on the washing machine, he takes the phone and sits down in Even's office to call Eskild.

It doesn't take long for the actor to pick up and, after Isak has shortened the small talk (another useless humanly thing) as much as possible, he gets straight to the point: "Can you help me with something, Eskild?"

"Why, yes, of course, baby robot," Eskild replies after a moment. "What can I help you with?"

"Okay, so, Even and I watched this movie, Dirty Dancing, and after, I asked him if he knows how to dance… And then we ended up dancing - or well, more like trying to dance. It didn't work, though. We were really bad at it… Anyway, so I've tried to find out why and watched about a thousand instruction videos but none of them has helped."

He can hear Eskild's typical screeching noises, even though the male human tries to conceal them. "You danced together? Aw, baby robot, I didn't expect you to make such great progress within such a short time."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Isak replies with a huff. "Anyway. I'm pretty sure it's some… well, some human thing that is missing. And so, I thought that maybe you could tell me what it was. You must know because you're very human!"

"Was that a compliment, baby robot?" Isak just huffs again and rolls his eyes, even though Eskild can't see him, while he waits for an actual reply.

Eskild seems to contemplate his question - which is good. If he thinks about it, it means his answer might actually be helpful and not just some dumb human thing, Isak won't be able to understand anyway.

Except that's exactly what it is.

After several minutes of thoughtful silence, all Eskild says is "passion."

And if Isak wasn't frustrated before, he definitely is now. All he wanted was help with his problem - and this is what he gets?!

 _Passion_.

He pulls up the dictionary for a definition and gets three; he can rule out one and neither of the two that he is left with are helpful in any way. _A strong feeling of enthusiasm or excitement for something or about doing something_ or _a strong sexual_ or _romantic feeling for someone_. He is a robot, he has no feelings and thus, no passion.

"Listen, baby robot," Eskild continues when Isak doesn't say anything. "You will get it eventually, you're a smart boy. But yeah… what you're missing is passion. Passion for dancing, of course, but also passion for your partner. You have to trust Even and you have to follow his lead. It doesn't matter so much if your steps are perfectly executed as long as you have fun and enjoy being with your partner."

Isak wants to scream. Instead, he hangs up and drops the phone on Even's desk.

***

The thing is, ever since Even has caught Isak practicing dancing on his own, hidden in his office, he hasn't stopped thinking about it. And more precisely, he hasn't stopped thinking about the reason _why_ Isak would do such an unexpected thing. But as the days went by, Isak never mentioned it to him, so Even almost started to believe this was a new secret hobby that Isak would rather keep to himself.

Turned out he was wrong.

Because today is Friday night, Sonja has a night shift and the second Even got home from work, Isak has ambushed him with the most unreal words he has ever heard coming from him.

"Even! You're right on time!" 

"Huh. For… what exactly?"

"For dancing. I did a lot of practice. We need to try again," Isak said, looking perfectly serious and very much determined.

Even has almost tripped on his own feet when Isak, not waiting for an answer from him, has grabbed his arm and pulled him to the living room, where soft music was already playing.

And here he is now, standing in the middle of his living room with an impatient Isak offering his hands to him. Even has to blink several times to make sure his eyes are functioning properly. He's still not quite sure he isn't hallucinating but then, he takes a step towards Isak and takes his hands into his, and- it's definitely not a hallucination. He can feel Isak's soft skin under his fingertips and the way he's squeezing back just a bit in return. This is real. This is his reality now, apparently.

Isak is asking him to dance with him and after all who is Even to deny him such a thing?

Mirroring what they did the first time, Isak's hand finds a place on Even's shoulder and Even's own hand settles on his waist, while their two other hands are intertwined together, arms outstretched on their side. Even notices two differences though: first, Isak isn't as tense as last time, far from it, his body actually looks relaxed; second, they are standing much closer, Isak's curls almost brushing Even's cheek, and it's all coming from Isak's initiative.

The new proximity leaves Even a bit breathless.

"Ready?" Isak asks, confident, and apparently very eager to try again.

"Sure. Whenever you want."

Isak closes his eyes for a few seconds like a human would do to concentrate, and Even is stunned. He can't believe how committed Isak is in succeeding in dancing with him. He seems to _care_ , deeply. Which shouldn't be possible because robots don't care about anything - or, not really, not the way humans do. They have orders to follow, tasks to fulfill - that's their purpose. But they don't care on a personal level. And if they would, they probably couldn't care less about _dancing_.

Isak does, though. He clearly does, and once again Even is amazed by how much he has changed in just a couple of months. 

A new song starts playing and immediately, on Isak's impulse, they start dancing.

And Even can tell right away it's nothing like the first time. They don't step on each other's feet; instead, Isak leads and Even happily follows. Their moves are smooth and coordinated. It goes so well that after a while, Isak looks up at him and smiles.

He looks so proud, not only of himself but of the both of them for finally managing to do it right - Even has never seen him so enthusiastic. Isak is happy. Isak is beautiful. And Even is craving to hold him closer, tighter, to know what it feels like to have their bodies pressed together.

So ultimately, that's what he does.

Even decides to change their position, to close the distance between them even more. Slowly, he lets go of Isak's hand and slides his own behind Isak's back, leaving it on the small of his back. Isak looks confused for half-second before he catches up easily, putting his two hands on Even's back, and stepping closer, almost pressing them chest to chest. Even is smiling the whole time, as he runs his other hand along Isak's back, up to Isak's neck where he tangles his fingers into the soft curls. In such a position, they are now dancing cheek to cheek, and it's _perfect_.

Tenk at i kveld var det meg du ville danse med

_Imagine tonight it was me you wanted to dance with_

Her vil jeg være

_Here I want to be_

Så la meg være, her vil jeg være

_So let me be, here I want to be_

Her fins kun deg, nå vet jeg

_Here is only you, now I know_

Jeg vil aldri danse med noen andre

_I will never dance with anyone else_

Closing his eyes to appreciate the moment as best as possible, Even finally pays attention to the lyrics of the song, and he almost laughs from how fitting it is.

Jeg vil aldri danse med noen andre

_I will never dance with anyone else_

Deep down, Even wishes for nothing more but to never dance with anyone else but Isak.

***

It's incredible.

After their awful first try and his bad training session, Isak would've never thought they would manage to dance together without stepping on each other. But here they are and they aren't half-bad.

But that's actually not what has him marveling - marveling at himself, at Even, at them together and mostly at how it _feels_.

Isak knows he can't feel things, he _knows_ but- he does.

And it almost causes a short circuit or, as humans would say, it blows his mind.

The first time Even has taken his hands earlier, Isak almost dropped them because he was so surprised by the _feeling_. When Eskild had touched him on set - and even when Even had touched him during their last try - it hadn't felt anything like this. It had simply been information sent from his sensors to his CPU, telling him that someone had touched him, where they had touched him, and the way this touch was to be interpreted.

This time, however, he can actually _feel_ it. And not just in his hands and his waist where Even's hands hold him but in his whole body. It's a warm, tingling sensation that slowly creeps its way from his hands and his waist through his whole body.

Then, as they slowly started to move to the music, the warmth has settled in his chest and he couldn't help but smile.

And now that Even is indicating for him to get closer and Isak willingly takes a step forward until they're almost touching with every external part of their bodies, he has to run a system check because with how warm, almost hot, and tingly he feels all over, it might just be that his systems are overheating. But everything is perfectly fine, there is no malfunction, no overheating, no virus.

It's just - _feelings_.

Isak can't process it, so he decides to concentrate on their dancing. They're in perfect sync with each other and the music - and their steps, while not perfect, are at least decent and in the right order.

When Even's right hand settles in his neck to play with his hair, a shiver runs down Isak's back and he can't stop himself from letting out a little, satisfied sigh. Isak doesn't know where it came from nor when he has made the decision to let it out; it just did.

Confused, Isak closes his eyes to reduce the stimulation - but it only makes him more aware of _Even_.

He notices Even's scent - a faint scent of coffee, his lime shower gel, the subtle scent of his aftershave - and how he is lowly humming along to the song playing in the background. Isak doesn't even hear the music anymore; he's too lost in touching, smelling, hearing, and _feeling_ Even.

He doesn't want to do anything else ever again.

Slowly, Isak lets his head sink down until his forehead is resting against Even's shoulder and Even's scent is almost consuming him.

And suddenly, he feels light-headed. As if his system was blurring his surroundings - but not only his visuals, his thoughts, and his other senses too. It doesn't make any sense at all but it's how he _feels_. How should he know how feelings are supposed to feel - and how is he supposed to know how to describe how he's feeling when he shouldn't be feeling anything at all?

He has no clue and while it should be disturbing, considering he knows everything and can look up anything, it isn't. Or maybe it would be if Isak were in the right mind to think about it. But he isn't, he is too busy enjoying being close to Even, smelling him, dancing with him, listening to his hums and feeling him breathe and move. It's marvelous; all the things Even does all at once, really - breathing, keeping his heart beating, moving, holding him, humming along, thinking - _feeling_. And here science was, saying humans weren't capable of multi-tasking when it was actually what they did all the time.

Humans are pretty amazing, really, and Even - Even is a very special specimen of these amazing beings.

Isak is pulled away from his thoughts when the song changes and Even's hands move over his back again, almost caressing him.

Reluctantly, Isak lifts his head to look at Even again. And for the first time, he actually notices Even's eyes, currently looking at him softly, almost tenderly.

There are only two things Isak knows for sure right now. One: Even's eyes are as blue as the ocean and two: if he were human, his heart would be beating way too fast and his breathing would be elevated as if he were actually exercising and not just swaying along to the music.

So, what the hell was happening to him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think of our dancing queens? <3  
> How will Isak process his feelings? Will he be able to acknowledge them for what they are?  
> What about Even?


	8. jeg ikke lenger helt forstår hva et forhold er (I no longer fully understand what a relationship is)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak is confused. Even is confused.  
> But that's how they end up reaching a turning point.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry for the late update! life happened, you know how it's like, but here it is!
> 
> we are more or less half-way through the story and, as the summary suggests it, this chapter definitely is a turning point for Even and Isak. we are taking a new and different road after that, for better and for worse ;)
> 
> but for now, enjoy <3

Shooting is coming to an end soon, they only have a couple of weeks of production left, which means everyone on set is getting a little more excited and stressed at the same time to reach the deadline. That's why Even doesn't think much of it at first, although he notices it, the way Eskild acts a bit strange (that is, more than usual) around him, by being extra friendly with him or throwing him knowing, pressing looks for no apparent reasons. 

Even goes with it without asking any questions, until one night Eskild stays longer than necessary. Usually, he's quick to leave after he's done with his scenes, being the busy type who always has a party to run to, a new date waiting for him, or a place where he's expected to be. But tonight, he lingers, so Even figures he has a work related issue he's been meaning to talk to him about for days. That's the only plausible explanation he can come up with.

So imagine his surprise when he hears Isak's name coming out of Eskild's mouth, once the actor finally decides to come to him.

"Hey Even! Thanks for today. Oh, by the way, how's Isak doing?" 

Even stares back at him for a while, taken aback. He saw how Eskild has taken a certain interest in Isak when he visited the set, but he hadn't expected him to ask about him afterwards. And why asking him now? What was it all about?

"Hm. He's fine," Even replies simply, as he's reminded of the moment Isak and him have shared just a few nights ago. 

They have danced together. And not only did they dance together, but it turned out to be intense and intimate. Something definitely happened between them. What, Even can't put a name to it just yet, but it was something big, that much he knows. 

The fact that Isak has been a bit distracted, like constantly lost in his thoughts, ever since, only confirms to him that they have _both_ felt it. Isak is trying to process it in his own way, he can tell. And Even has the certitude that Isak will come to him to discuss it once he's ready. 

"That's great," Eskild grins then. "He seemed alright when I talked to him on the phone the other day, although he was a bit… preoccupied, I guess. He had lots of interesting questions about dancing." And… What? Isak has called Eskild? Even remembers very well how Eskild gave him his phone number the day they met on set, but he had no idea Isak actually kept it, let alone _used_ it to ask questions to _Eskild_. And about dancing, really? "About dancing with someone else," Eskild adds to fill the silence that settled while Even's mind was busy overthinking everything.

"Oh. Really?" Is the only answer he eventually comes up with.

He's seen Isak practicing dancing on his own. Does it mean Isak decided to call Eskild to ask for advices, too? Does Eskild know Isak was practicing to dance… with _him_? 

Judging by Eskild's behavior towards him lately, it's very likely. And Even doesn't know what to think of it. At least Eskild doesn't seem to think it's weird, or that it's completely stupid like Sonja would. Actually, Sonja would think much worse things of it if she knew- but whatever.

"Isak is truly amazing," Eskild points out and his words awake something possessive inside Even, something he isn't proud of but he's struggling to fight back nonetheless. Everything inside him is screaming _mine_ for a moment before he pushes it back as best as he can. Isak isn't his and he doesn't want him to. Not like that. He doesn't want to own Isak, to make him his property in any way; although on the paper, he kinda is.

"Yeah, he is," he ends up saying with a barely contained strained voice.

"He's so smart and so curious. I was very surprised he wanted to ask me tips about dancing, of all things, but… That's good, isn't it? I hope he figured it out."

Eskild is still smiling wide at him, with the face of someone who knows much more than what he's actually saying.

"Yeah. He's trying out… new things."

"Like dancing?"

"Dancing. Exactly."

"With a partner."

Even pauses a bit too long. Eskild winks at him. "With you?" He asks, making it now clear he's known all along.

"Huh. No. I mean, yes. Maybe. I mean, we watched Dirty Dancing the other day," Even stutters like an idiot, not knowing what to answer. Or what it is that Eskild wants him to admit. What's the point of this conversation anyway?!

"How nice. I love Dirty Dancing. It teaches a lot about passion and trust, doesn't it? And how sometimes love can arise between very different people." 

Even remains silent. Is he implying… 

"It's good that Isak has the space to explore. You also seem to spend a lot of time with him, showing him movies, practicing dancing... You must very much enjoy his company," Eskild keeps talking, this time with a smirk in the corner of his mouth.

Even feels himself blush, but he really hopes it goes unnoticed. What the fuck. This conversation needed to end like minutes ago already.

As if Eskild can read his mind, he concludes with, "anyway. I'm running late, I gotta go. It was _very_ interesting speaking with you, Even. Say hi to Isak for me. Bye!"

And so, in a blink of the eye, Eskild is gone, and Even is left with a hundred questions.

***

Confusion seems to be Isak's new and constant companion and as much as he wants to get rid of it, he just simply can't. Because he still hasn't figured out what the actual problem is - or maybe he has but it just makes zero sense to him.

Maybe because all the explanations he has come up with so far have to do with feelings - and more precisely his feelings.

And that's where the whole problem started.

As a robot, Isak can't have feelings and he can't like things or activities or people. But here he was - feeling frustrated and confused, enjoying the dancing and liking Even. Or well, he isn't quite sure about the 'liking Even' part. Isak doesn't know how to actually like a human and how it feels to like someone - and when he tried to look it up on the internet, all the articles were about _romantically_ liking someone. And that's even more out of the question than just liking Even because he was a nice owner or- as a friend.

Maybe all of this was just pointless and he should forget about that evening and all this stupid feeling business.

It would be for the best, especially since he was barely able to focus on his tasks during the day and sooner or later, he will fuck something up and Sonja will notice and that's gonna be the end of him, for sure. Sonja wouldn't let him live it down if the flat was untidy, the laundry dirty or the fridge empty.

For now, he manages to do both - think about his issue and do the tasks Sonja gives him, but Isak is really not sure for how much longer he'll be able to do that.

He needs to figure this out or forget about all of it.

Since he can't clean out his RAM - he lacks the admin rights, only authorized humans from his manufacturer can do that -, forgetting seems out of the question. So, Isak will have to figure it out somehow.

And as this seems to be another _human_ problem, Isak eventually comes to the conclusion that it's best to call Eskild again. Because, even though he'd actually prefer to talk to Even, he doesn't think it's the best idea to do so. He can't even explain why - it's just a… well, a _feeling_. Isak seems to be having a lot of those recently, even though he shouldn't be having any at all.

So, one afternoon Isak takes the phone to Even's office, after finishing all his tasks early, and sits down with it on Even's chair. He types in Eskild's number from memory and, while he waits for him to pick up, lets his eyes wander around the room. They stop on the DVD shelf and Isak smiles a little at how big the section with the DVDs Even and him have already watched together has grown.

Thinking back to the first time they have watched a movie together, makes him realize how much time they have already spent together and how much their relationship has changed - and not only their relationship, Isak thinks.

He has changed as well. And the thought is kind of scary.

"Isak?" he almost jumps out of the chair when Eskild finally picks up his phone and calls out his name. "Baby robot, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

Isak sighs before rearranging himself on the chair. Eskild's enthusiasm was always so over the top but - to be quite honest - Isak has come to like it. "Hi," he says lowly. "I just… I think I need your help again."

"Of course, sweetie!" Eskild sounds rather pleased with himself and Isak has yet another thing to add to the list of things he doesn't understand. "What can I help you with today? By the way, is this gonna be a regular thing from now on? Should we make a schedule for regular sessions?"

"What? No! I don't think I'll need regular help… and I don't know yet when I'll need help again, at all, Eskild," Isak replies with a frown.

On the other end of the line, Eskild just laughs and Isak shifts in his chair and waits for it to pass. If it was anyone else, Isak would think it's rude - but he has grasped during their limited time together that Eskild is different and that he isn't being rude, he's just being himself.

Eventually, the laughing ebs out and Eskild speaks, "sorry, baby robot… Alright, I'm listening, what do you need help with?"

Isak stumbles over his first word and stops. He only now realizes that he hasn't thought this through. There is no plan on how to go about this, he has rushed into calling Eskild as soon as the idea has popped up in his head: another thing that shouldn't be happening to him - because he is a robot who acts rationally, thinks things through, makes lists and doesn't just _do_ things - but yet it is happening.

All of this is just getting more and more confusing and Isak's thoughts, once again, go back to an error. Maybe, no matter how hard Even has tried to convince him that it's not true, he has a malfunction after all and needs to be fixed by his manufacturer.

But- Isak doesn't _want_ that.

Isak will rather take the confusion and the feeling of being _faulty_ than not having this thing with Even, than not feeling things, than just doing every task Sonja gives him without thinking.

"Have you ever liked someone?" Is eventually the first question he can form in his head to get to the topic that spurs his confusion.

"Have I ever liked someone?" Eskild repeats in confusion but sounding almost amused. "Oh - you mean, like a crush? Of course, Isak. Hundreds of men have caught my attention."

Isak frowns while listening to Eskild expanding on several of his crushes with half an ear. Eventually, when he has thought about it for a moment, Isak interrupts Eskild again: "Only men, though? You've only had crushes on men?"

"Yes, baby robot. I'm gay. That's what gay people do - have crushes solely on other men, you know?"

Isak checks the definition and nods. "I understand. So… someone who has a crush on a woman or is in a relationship with a woman" - he looks for the word that goes with it - "someone hetero, they only have crushes on women?"

"Well, if a person is hetero, they only like people from the opposite sex, yes," Eskild explains. "But they could also be bi, or pan, like Even, for example."

Immediately, Isak pricks up his ears. "Pan? What does that mean?"

"There are different definitions people like to use because the experience of sexuality isn't universal," Eskild tells him while Isak's visuals show him a striped flag in pink, yellow and cyan. "Even usual goes with 'attraction to people regardless of gender', as far as I know."

" _Oh_." The sound is out of Isak's mouth before he even realizes it. "So… he could like someone who doesn't have a gender at all?"

"Pretty much, yeah."

Isak contemplates this for a while and then starts to smile because this fits Even just perfectly. But the smile fades just as quickly- not caring about gender still probably only applies to humans and not to robots.

And what the hell is he actually thinking? It's not like he wants Even to like him or something.

"Why do you ask that, sweetie?" Eskild asks as if he was looking right into his head, reading all of Isak's thoughts. "Is there someone you like?"

Isak stutters a little, almost panicking before he regains his composure. "Don't be ridiculous, Eskild. I already told you that robots don't like things, much less people.."

"Yeah," Eskild says and Isak can hear him smile through it. "But you're not like any other robot, Isak. You're way more, you're pretty amazing if you ask me."

Isak has to think about that. So, while he thinks he might be faulty, Eskild seems to be convinced of the opposite. That he is more, amazing - _special_?

"Even if that were true," he eventually replies, "it doesn't mean I like Even."

Eskild snickers. "Even? Well, well, well.. who has said anything about Even, baby robot?"

Isak blushes a deep crimson and wants to hit his head on the desk. Now what did he do? This whole _feelings_ business has him doing the dumbest stuff.

"No, I didn't… of course, no. I didn't mean that," he stutters inconsistently. "I just meant that… Nevermind, really. I have to go now. I have to prepare dinner. Bye, Eskild, and thank you."

Eskild laughs brightly. "Oh, my sweet, sweet baby robot. Don't worry… it's okay if you like Even. Just be careful and don't let him break your little heart."

"I don't have a heart, Eskild. And what the fuck? Hearts can't be broken. They're not bones, they're bundles of muscles, okay?"

Before Eskild can object, Isak hangs up.

He's probably even more confused now than before. And definitely more frustrated. Why has he thought that Eskild could be of any help?

***

Timing seems to be a recurrent issue in Even's life. _Bad_ timing, more precisely.

It was bad timing when he had a major episode back in high school, leading to him getting diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but right before his final exams - that he ended up missing, because he couldn't get out of bed. 

It was bad timing when he finally got the nerves to come out to Sonja, to tell her, _I don't just like girls. I like people, regardless of their gender_ , because it turned out he was hypomanic when he did and Sonja convinced him it was just one of his latest short-lived ideas, it was his illness making things up and not him sharing genuine feelings regarding his sexual orientation. It took him an extra five years to come to terms with it, to get rid of the denial and the doubt _Sonja_ has managed to spread inside his head. And even then, it was bad timing again: one of Sonja's very straight and very simple-minded friends made a comment about gay people always being funny and girly, and it pissed Even off to no end, so he told her being into dudes had nothing to do with sense of humour or stereotypical appearances. She stood her grounds though, retorted that _what do you know about gay people anyway? I have gay friends. I don't think you do_ , he couldn't refrain from shouting that he knew better than anyone here, because he was a guy and he liked guys, too, so he has a thing or two in common with her so-called _gay friends_. Of course, Sonja had been furious after that, because apparently it's not something you share over dinner.

(She didn't say when was he actually allowed to share it, then. Probably never, that's the thing.)

It was bad timing when he got a very interesting opportunity for a movie, but it was abroad, and Sonja was in the middle of her exams to officially become a gynecologist and she didn't have time to worry about him _losing his shit_ while they were apart, so he ended up turning down the offer to stay where Sonja could easily keep an eye on him. He did leave for a project abroad a year later, and that's how long it took him to get rid of yet another unwanted fact Sonja has put in his brain - that he couldn't take care of himself, of his mental health, on his own and thrive in his job.

Lots of other moments in Even's life have been subjected to bad timing, the latest and not the slightest being his upcoming marriage with Sonja.

But tonight, as he's coming back from work with his mind still tumbling over his conversation with Eskild from a few days ago and Isak's weird, reserved behavior, is another bad timing moment to add to the list.

He really doesn't mean to eavesdrop. He's walking to his office, knowing Isak would be there since he was nowhere to be found in the main areas. But the door is slightly ajar and a few words get to him before he has time to realize Isak is on the phone, and therefore he should turn away and wait for him to be done.

"Don't be ridiculous, Eskild. I already told you that robots don't like things, much less people..." He hears Isak say.

Instantly, Even feels his heart sink inside his chest. None of this should come as a surprise to him, even less a disappointment, but somehow it is. First, although it's a detail at this point, Isak is once again on the phone with Eskild, talking to him, after days of almost radio silence with Even. Isak is more comfortable speaking with Eskild than him, this is a clear fact now. Even worse, maybe Isak _needs_ to call Eskild and talk to him, _vent_ to him, maybe about Even himself. The idea is close to being unbearable to Even, but it's a high possibility nonetheless, he comes to realize.

Second, and it's the hardest and yet most confusing part for him, it hurts to hear Isak state with so much conviction how robots don't like people. Meaning, Isak doesn't like people. Isak doesn't like _him_. He can't. And Isak most likely has no interest in doing so, because he remains a robot, no matter the improvements he has made over the months.

And again, this shouldn't be a big revelation to Even, he has known from the start. What happened between them though… it has blurred the lines for him. And the thing is, Even has naively thought it did for Isak, too, after the intimate moment they've shared together, hugging, touching, _dancing_. Even has felt something and he had been convinced until then that so did Isak. 

It's been a mistake, clearly. 

And then, Isak's next words hit him like a terrible, final confirmation of everything he just figured out.

"Even if that were true," Isak replies to something Eskild must have said, "it doesn't mean I like Even."

_It doesn't mean I like Even._

Yes, Isak doesn't like him. Of course he doesn't, why would he? He's a robot. He's cleaning and tidying for Even and Sonja, very often he's being treated like a thing more than a person, so why would he like _him_ … 

Even walks away before he hears more; he knows his heart can't take more of it. And he's fully aware of how it shouldn't hurt him that much, it's a ridiculous thing to be left so affected by his robot's words. Isak doesn't like him because he doesn't like people and it's an obvious fact. Nothing new.

Nothing new except, he has wrapped Isak in his arms, he has held his hand and looked into his eyes while they were dancing, he has felt his breath shutter and he has heard him sigh against him - he is so certain of what he has felt, of what Isak has felt, reacting positively to all of it. Did his mind really trick him into believing something completely untrue? _How?_ Words can lie but not bodies. And Isak's body was telling an entire different story.

Disoriented and lost, Even takes a seat at the kitchen table and then lets his head fall on his folded arms. He doesn't know how long he stays in this position, eyes closed while he replays the night they have danced together, and then Isak's words, trying to make sense of it, trying to find clues he's been wrong all along and Isak is actually this close to beg Eskild to take him away from him.

Nothing adds up though. Nothing makes sense.

Eventually, he hears footsteps that he knows belong to Isak, not only because it's only the two of them in the apartment but also because he knows how Isak's walk sounds by now. So he straightens up and looks up at Isak, who's already watching him with confused eyes.

"Even? Are you okay?" He asks, and the worst thing is, he sounds genuinely concerned. Why would he be so worried about him if he doesn't like him?

Unless, it's just how Isak is programmed to be. Being concerned for his owner so he could try to fix it.

 _Fuck_. Even's head is going to explode with all this doubt. He needs to ask, he needs to know for sure, there is no other way around it.

"Isak. Please sit with me," Even hears himself say, although he doesn't remember making the decision. Whatever. It works just fine. 

Isak frowns, even more confused than before, but takes a seat anyway.

"What's going on?"

Even figures there is no proper, subtle way to approach the subject, so he goes with it. "You've been… weird, lately. Distant? Whatever it is, something's off. And I thought I would give you space to figure it out, until you feel ready to talk to me about it. But… I know you're talking with Eskild, and it's fine, you're free to do so, but now I'm wondering if I did something wrong, if… Did I? Did I upset you?"

He knows he's rambling, it's what he does when he's anxious and slightly frustrated by a situation, but he can't help it. 

"No, of course not," Isak replies right away, with no hesitation, looking taken aback by Even's apparently unexpected question. And yet, Even isn't 100% convinced. Because it doesn't explain what's going on.

"So you need to clear some things for me, please. Because… when we danced? I have _my_ interpretation of things, my impressions. And I thought we were on the same page, but now I'm starting to think we actually aren't, so I need you to tell me what to think. Because nothing makes sense to me anymore. I need you to tell me, Isak. What happened then? Why are you avoiding me? Are you calling Eskild about it? What did you…" He pauses, hesitating on the choice of words. Isak is staring back at him with wide eyes, and Even can't tell if he's getting more bewildered at every sentence because there is nothing to say, or if Even is right on the mark. So, "what did you feel then?" He continues, deciding that there is only one right word for it and he's pretty sure Isak knows more about it than he lets it seem. "What do you feel now, Isak?"

Even is a bit out of breath when he's done, probably more from all the overthinking than from the talking itself, but at least it's done, it's in the open, and he's waiting for Isak to explain himself now. Isak, who looks trapped and uncertain and so cautious.

Really; _what's going on?!_

***

Isak is biting his lip while trying to figure out what to say or do now.

He is still too confused to tell Even what is actually going on with him. And maybe, he's also a bit scared of what Even might say. What if Even thinks he's stupid or something like that once he tells him?

So, Isak doesn't actually want to tell him anything about what's been going on with him… or about what he's _feeling_.

But there is a problem there. Because even if he doesn't want to, he kind of has to. Even is his owner and he has asked him a question. And a question from his owner is almost like an order - Isak has to answer him. Even if Even would never insist on this, it is in Isak's programming and there isn't much he can do about it. He can't even lie, not to his owner at least. It's no problem - technically - for him to lie to Eskild for example. His programming will even make him lie to people if it's in the interest of his owners. But he is absolutely incapable of lying to Even and Sonja.

So, Isak is caught in a bit of a dilemma.

One, he has to quickly find a way out of because Even is still looking at him demandingly, waiting for his reply.

But maybe… if he doesn't actually lie? Maybe he doesn't have to tell Even what is actually going on with him, since he doesn't really know himself. So, when he tells something that might not be true, it wouldn't be a lie because Isak himself doesn't know what is true and what is not.

"Isak?" Even interrupts his thoughts, looking at him inquiringly but also - worried? Probably because Isak has never taken this long to reply. Isak blushes slightly and quickly blurts out an apology. Well, this is going absolutely great… _not_.

"Yes, uhm… uh, what I'm feeling is…" He mumbles, still unsure of what he actually wants to say, what he can say. He isn't usually this slow with his thinking. It's rather embarrassing by now. "Well, I'm actually… a little bit confused, I think? But dancing is fun. Maybe we can do it again sometime."

For a while, Even just keeps staring at him quietly as if he is waiting for Isak to continue. But Isak doesn't, he doesn't know what else to say and since he answered his owner's question, he doesn't have to say anything else really.

Eventually, Even sighs. "Is that all, Isak?" He asks carefully. "Because that isn't really what I meant, you know? I meant how you felt about… us dancing together and… why you're not really talking to me anymore? Is there something I did that I shouldn't have? Is it my fault that you're confused, Isak? What exactly are you so confused about?"

"It's not your fault," Isak promises.

And it really isn't a lie because, even though Even has probably furthered his confusion and might even be the trigger of it, it still isn't his fault. Isak knows that for sure because it's actually his fault. Because if Even treated any other robot like this, if he danced with another robot, if he was this kind with another robot, nothing like this would've happened. Other robots don't feel things, they don't get confused about emotions and dancing.

Isak has looked it up, there has never been a report on a robot with feelings, ever. Of course, humans have tried to make robots more and more human and Isak's line of production is proof that they've partly succeeded in doing so - when it comes to looks and talking. But when it comes to feelings, they've failed again and again since it is impossible to make a thing feel.

Feelings are unique to humans and always will be - that's what scientists and technologist and engineers have all agreed on.

Yet here Isak is.

And if that isn't confusing, Isak doesn't know what might be.

When soft fingertips nudge against his hand, Isak snaps out of his thoughts and looks down to his hand. Even's index finger still rests against skin, the spot slowly heating up and sending heat through Isak's whole body.

Isak blushes - due to the finger and the fact that he completely forgot to answer. "Uhm, well… I'm confused about a lot of things, okay?" He eventually manages to say and then he stands up from his chair, inclined to get away as quickly as possible before he actually says something he doesn't want to say. "But it's not your fault, Even. I promise. You didn't do anything wrong either, okay?"

Isak looks down to his owner, trying to come up with an excuse as to why he has to leave him without a definite answer.

But his head is empty, he doesn't know what to say - once again. All he can do is look down at Even, his confusion heightening while Isak feels like he's getting lost in the blue eyes looking back at him.

Biting his lip, Isak reaches out with his hand. He doesn't know why he does it or when he made the decision to do so, but he does.

His fingers find a strand of Even's blonde hair that hangs loosely on his face. Without breaking eye contact, Isak's takes the strand between his thumb and his index finger and slowly puts it back behind Even's ear with his trembling hand.

The air around them feels hot to Isak and he knows that Even is holding his breath - but he doesn't know what it means.

Once the strand is safely back behind Even's ear, Isak regains some of his more conscious functions. He blushes even darker before he quickly turns around and almost runs out of the room because now he is even more confused than he was ever before, because he has no idea what just happened there and why he did what he did.

He doesn't know what it means and he is scared of what it might mean. But even more so, he is scared that Even will be mad about it.

Isak has no right to touch his owner like this. Yet, it's - and even if he doesn't want to admit it to himself yet, he knows that for sure - all he wants to do until he's going to be discarded.

Maybe - maybe Eskild was right.

Maybe Isak likes Even.

***

_What the hell just happened?_

Even can't work out what just occurred. If he was puzzled before, it's nothing compared to how he feels now. He is left completely astonished, sitting alone in the kitchen, and unable to move, disarticulated like a rag doll. Did Isak just leave the room? Did he… avoid his questions? Brushed him off - albeit kindly enough? It's like nothing Isak has ever done before, and he's pretty sure it's not something robots in general would do. Not to their owner, although, Even doesn't want to think of Isak as just another robot and their relationship as some regular owner/robot thing. It's not them. They are more than this by now.

But still. Isak usually talks to him, shares his thoughts and his… feelings, or whatever it is that Isak experiences inside that witty, clever head of his. They became great at communicating, they came such a long way and- well, Even can't believe Isak is hiding things from him. Why would he? Does he not trust him?

Isak is confused, he said so himself. And whatever the problem is, he promised it wasn't Even's fault. Yet, it must be about him if Isak won't talk to him. So what could it be?

Even is left with more questions than answers, but even then, it isn't what's making him unable to function properly, staring at the spot Isak has just left. What's really leaving him unsettled, overwhelmed, in complete _awe_ , is Isak's tender attention before he ran away. It's Isak making the first move and initiating such an affectionate gesture.

It wasn't squeezing his shoulder as a sign of comfort, like any friend or colleague would do. It wasn't in the context of dancing either. It was different, it was far more intimate than what they have ever done. And what baffles Even even more is that Isak did it while looking beautifully flushed and in the process of getting away as fast as possible from this uncomfortable conversation and the questions he didn't want to answer. Like he knew leaving Even would hurt him, so he decided to give him something to hold on to. Something kind. Something pure. 

Something loving.

And all of sudden, Even is filled with hope again. 

He's done listening to his fears and doubts. There is something meaningful and genuine growing between Isak and him, and whatever it is, he's ready for it. If Isak needs more time to figure it out, then he will wait for him. It's worth it.

Isak is worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soooo were they confused enough for you? haha  
> the only one who isn't a mess in this chapter is Eskild, because of course guru knows best. but what does he know, hm? ;)  
> Isak is trying to figure out what's happening to him, lost between what he feels and what he's been told he couldn't feel. in the middle of it, Even is waiting for him to open up, while dealing with his own insecurities. the final scene though... will lead to quite a few changes between them. so what do you think is going to happen next? 
> 
> we truly hope you enjoyed this chapter. don't hesitate to share your thoughts <3


	9. jeg hører hjertet ditt slå fortere (I hear your heart beat faster)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The spark between Even and Isak slowly grows into a fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, guys... but you know - life happened!  
> But, we think that a) this chapter is very much worth the wait and b) we can go back to our weekly updates on the weekend (preferable on Saturdays!). Thanks for being patient with us either way - and as always, thank you so much for all your lovely comments. And welcome to the new readers, too! We appreciate all of you so much, you have no idea! <3

Over the next few days, things don't get exactly weird between them, but they definitely change. Even has yet to figure out whether it's a good or a bad thing, but for now, he's leaning toward the good side. Because Even notices how Isak's behavior around him tends to become much less shy than before, and much more shameless. And it starts with looks. There were always looks, but so far it's pretty much always been coming from Even (watching Isak doing pretty much anything became his favorite kind of entertainment, even better than movies, although it's not something he should admit to anyone, ever). Now, though, it also comes from Isak. 

It's Isak taking a break from whatever it is that he's taking care of to dart a look at Even from across the room. 

It's Isak stopping by his office when Even's busy working there, just to sneak a peek, smiling warmly back at Even if he gets caught, and then walking away without saying anything - as if the sole purpose of his venture was to see him, and not to talk to him about anything specific. 

It's Isak, just this morning, coming to wake Even up because his alarm didn't go off and by now Isak knows his schedule by heart, and instead of slipping out of the room to give him space while he gets dressed hastily, he stays in the doorway and stares. At Even. At Even, mindlessly stripping himself naked in the bedroom before running to the shower. Neither Isak nor his inquiring eyes follow him to the bathroom but it's a close thing. And it does _not_ give Even salacious ideas in the shower that he has to begrudgingly shake away because he doesn't have time for it. It wouldn't be appropriate either, but weirdly enough, it only comes second in his mind.

Finally, it's also Isak, currently sitting in front of Even at the kitchen table after having arranged a quick breakfast for him, watching him eat with an unsettling but intriguing gleam in his emerald eyes. Once again, Even doesn't know what to think of it, doesn't know what it is that is going through Isak's mind, but he also can't bring himself to worry too much about it. Whatever it is, it's kind of… Exciting?

"You must be very excited," Isak says at the same time as the thought crosses his mind and Even almost chokes on his bite of scrambled eggs. It's his recipe, although he didn't make them - Isak did. A while back, he taught Isak how to cook them and shared his very secret ingredient with him - something he never did with anyone before. By now, Isak can cook them better than he ever did and Even isn't even offended by it. On the contrary, he feels kind of proud of it. Proud of Isak.

"Huh. About?" Even stutters, having a difficult time catching up with the conversation they were apparently having. He's usually very good at listening to Isak, for he doesn't take it for granted. Once upon a time hearing a word from him that didn't involve his robot tasks was such a challenge to overcome that it was close to being a miracle when it happened. They got better at talking, _obviously_. But Even hasn't forgotten. 

He also loves listening to him, no matter the subject. But this morning, he seems to be too distracted to focus.

Isak raises an eyebrow at him but can't hold back a smirk like maybe he knows exactly what's going on with Even. "The end of production. Soon you will be putting your movie together shot by shot, scene by scene, so it becomes whole. It must feel exciting."

Right. His movie. The end of the directing, filming process.

"Well, I'm not the only one working on editing, we are a whole team and I'm not even allowed to decide on everything but…" He's rambling. Why is he rambling? Is he feeling nervous? He didn't even give much thought about the end of production. He's been too busy dreaming, thinking, and overthinking about Isak all day and night.

 _Damn_. If he isn't the very definition of desperate, he doesn't know what is.

"Still your movie," Isak insists before he leans and extends his arm over the table.

Even doesn't understand what Isak is doing until Isak's hand finds his face and he feels fingers - _Isak's_ fingers - on him, in the corner of his mouth, wiping something with his thumb and then lingering a bit longer than necessary on his bottom lip. It sends Even's heart into a frenzy, especially when he realizes Isak's eyes are fixed on his mouth. He can't help but imagine a situation where Isak would be staring at his lips for other reasons than to wipe scrambled eggs off it. Would it be a thing - Isak looking at his lips and thinking about how kissable they are to him? 

Probably not. Even is being ridiculous and delusional again.

"There," Isak murmurs while he's withdrawing his hand. Even misses it as soon as he does.

But not for long. The loss is quickly swept away when Isak brings his thumb to his lips and licks it, licks the crumb of scrambled eggs he just fucking wiped from _Even's_ mouth. As if it's a casual, normal thing to do, especially coming from a robot who isn't supposed to eat.

It takes all of Even's strength not to swear, not to stand up, walk over to Isak, grab him by the hips and sit him on the table to finally get what the offending piece of scrambled egg got before him - a taste of Isak.

 _Chill, Even. What the fuck_.

"Are you done with it?" Isak asks, completely oblivious to the state he's managed to put Even in.

Even has to blink once. Twice. Maybe three times, before he understands Isak is pointing at his empty plate. He doesn't even remember finishing it. In the end, Even doesn't dare say a word, he's too scared of what could come out of his mouth, so instead, he nods his head. Isak nods at him with a smile, picks his plate up, and walks to the sink, still perfectly unaware.

Even ends up at work 30 minutes late because he has to take a second shower that morning.

***

Now that Even is almost done with filming and has more free time on his hands, he tends to sit around Isak while Isak is taking care of his chores and tasks. He would probably even help, but Isak doesn't let him. Those are his tasks and it's not hard or straining for him, so he can do it on his own. And who even knows what Sonja would do to the both of them if she ever found out.

So, Even sits in the living room when Isak is cleaning there, he sits at the kitchen table while Isak does the dishes, he is stretched out on the bed while Isak folds the clean laundry or he sits on top of the washing machine while Isak cleans the bathroom.

Most of the time, he doesn't do anything but watch Isak - it makes Isak a little edgy and flustered and he has to focus extra hard, but at the same time he also basks in the attention?! However, sometimes Even also reads a book, the newspaper, or a magazine and simply enjoys being in Isak's proximity while doing so and every once in a while he reads sentences or paragraphs to Isak, asking him for the meaning of something or his thoughts on what was written.

And Isak? He adores it.

It's ridiculous, really, how much he enjoys Even being there with him. It shouldn't make a difference for him because he should be focused on fulfilling his tasks. Yet, somehow, that is the last thing he's focused on these days.

Today Even is at home since the early afternoon and Isak has promised him to make his favorite dish for dinner.

Even is sitting at the kitchen table, reading the newspaper in silence, while Isak has just finished chopping all the vegetables. Now, he just needs to get the pasta from the shelf before he can start the actual cooking part.

Isak knows there is one pack of conchiglie left in the top shelf and he is very determined to use that one - because it goes well with the vegetables and the sauce and because he knows those are Even's favorite type of pasta since he likes the fact that they are shaped like little shells.

So, Isak opens the top shelf and spots the pasta pack on the topmost board in the far back and thus, just out of reach for him.

Nevertheless, Isak tries to reach for the pasta. He doesn't want to disturb Even while reading and maybe, just maybe, if he stretches a little more, he might be able to reach the pack without getting a ladder or asking Even for help.

Eventually, he is on his tiptoes with his arm completely outstretched and yet he barely manages to graze the pack with his fingertips.

He leans on to the countertop to stretch even further - but it's really no use. He's just some centimeters too small to reach the pack and now he has even managed to push it further back and completely out of reach.

Just as he wants to move back to get the ladder, there's a warm body behind him and a long arm stretches over his shoulder to make a grab for the pasta. Isak stills immediately, only his eyes are moving, wandering along the arm until he looks at Even's fingers wrapped around the pack of pasta on the shelf. They are also not moving anymore and neither is Even's arm.

And only now Isak realizes how close Even actually is to him.

Even's chest is almost pressing against his back and his arm is almost resting on his shoulder. Isak can feel Even's breath on his cheek, as well as some strands of hair that are tickling against his skin. 

Isak isn't quite sure for how long they're standing like that - even though he usually can take the exact time and time span of anything - before Even moves just a little bit.

But Even doesn't move away. He moves forward, pretending to need that space to actually be able to grip the pasta better until his chest is pressed to Isak's back. Isak feels hot everywhere, but especially in the places where Even is touching him. It almost feels like he's burning up.

Now that Even's chest is pressing against his back, Isak can actually feel Even's heart beating.

And he is concerned!

Even's heart rate is too high for a healthy man in his twenties, his heart is beating way too fast. It should be somewhere between 60 and 90 bpm, maybe even 100 bpm. But Even's is almost at 130 bpm; it's practically racing!

Is this normal for Even? Then he should probably get his heart checked by a cardiologist because this is not healthy at all.

Or… Isak cannot believe himself for thinking this… maybe it's because of him? Is he- is he making Even nervous?

Before Isak can think about it further, Even takes the pasta out of the shelf and moves away from him, putting the pack next to the stove. "You know, you could've just asked, Isak," Even says before sitting back down on his chair.

Isak blushes heavily and turns towards the stove to regain his composure.

What just happened?

It takes Isak almost five minutes until he feels ready to continue cooking.

***

Tonight, production comes to an end and the whole crew has decided to celebrate. It's meant to start at the studio, right after their last shooting, then they are supposed to move to their usual bar until they get kicked out around 2, and after that, they would finally end the night at one of the producer's penthouses. Even has known about it for weeks but never said a word to Sonja, knowing she was scheduled to work that night and so if he kept his mouth shut, she wouldn't make any arrangement to be free and celebrate with him. He knows it isn't a normal behavior at all for someone about to get married but it isn't exactly news either.

His relationship doesn't make any sense anymore. It's a fact.

What makes more and more sense though, is Isak. Being with him. Talking with him. Laughing, watching movies, doing grocery shopping, and more recently… flirting.

Even can't really pinpoint when he stopped tiptoeing around Isak, stopped second-guessing everything he said and did around him out of fear of making him feel uncomfortable, in favor of complimenting him, teasing him, making him _blush_ ; but it clearly works for the both of them. Because Isak doesn't seem to master the art of flirting in any way (neither does Even, to be honest, but people used to tell him he had enough charisma and a deep enough voice to trick them into believing he was good at it), but he always looks like he likes it a lot.

The last day of production is a perfect example of it.

Sonja has never been on the guest list but Even doesn't think twice before inviting Isak. The funny thing is, Even has been working with quite a few of his crewmates for years and yet Sonja barely knows any of them, and if she does, she never once said a single nice word about them. Isak, on the other hand, looks like he belongs there, around Mikael, Eva, Vilde, Linn, Jonas, Eskild (well, especially Eskild), and all the others.

Since Even wasn't planning on driving back home and then coming back on set to celebrate, Isak spent the day on set for the second time. And just like last time, he spent half the day with Eskild. Today though Even was relieved when he realized he didn't feel jealous anymore. Sure, Isak laughed and rolled his eyes at Eskild, but he didn't look at him the way he looked at Even - Even can see it more clearly now. They are friends, and it's a very good thing: Isak deserves kind, loyal friends like Eskild.

After they've shot the last scene and popped the champagne to celebrate properly, people started to get changed into more festive clothes for the bar and the after-party. Even didn't care enough to bring a suit, because what's the point when he's only going to be around his crewmates? But Eskild, Eva, and Vilde were having none of it. They dragged him into the costume room and worked magic, as always.

It was nothing, though, compared to what they did with Isak, who was taken hostage by Eskild and wouldn't be released unless he got into the outfit they picked for him. And the second Even sees him, he's grateful for his crewmates' dramatics. It is _so_ worth it. 

"Wow. You look stunning," Even says out loud. Eskild, Eva, and Vilde have left them alone in the room to get more champagne. He doesn't feel embarrassed one bit by his words, and even less so by _who_ he's telling them to. He's telling the truth and nothing but the truth.

Isak's face turns red instantly as his eyes travel from Even to the mirror in front of him where he can see himself all dressed up in his green-ish velvet suit. They even brushed his hair and styled it a bit. 

"Yeah, right," Isak answers eventually, except his tone makes it sound like he's taking Even's compliment as a joke. 

"I'm serious, Isak. You're so handsome. You always are but in this… Damn." Isak doesn't argue back, just turns into a blushing mess. It's mesmerizing, the effect Even's words seem to have on him. Almost unreal. "What? You don't agree?" Even teases him, provokes him, just to see what he would say.

"I'm not meant to be… handsome. Or stunning. Or anything like that," Isak points out with a pout. _A pout_. Even is dying inside at how cute he's being.

"Well, I think you're wrong. There is no way they've made you look like _that_ if the point wasn't to make you look beautiful."

Isak huffs as he looks down and finds a new interest in his shoes. "I can't be handsome and stunning _and_ beautiful," he mutters.

"Oh, but you can," Even tells him, almost like a promise. "And also pretty." He walks slowly to Isak until he can stand right beside him in front of the mirror. "Fucking adorable," he whispers. Isak is playing with his fingers, a nervous gesture that screams _human_ , and yet…

It doesn't matter. Because looking at both their reflections in the mirror, Even can't help but think the sight is _right_. That's how they are meant to be, meant to look like: side by side, Isak in his velvet suit and Even in a classic black suit with a white shirt.

"We look perfect together, don't you think?" Even speaks again in a soft voice. He didn't really mean to share this thought, it's probably too foolish and unfair to the both of them, but he also has never meant anything more in his entire life.

"I don't know what you mean," Isak retorts. But judging by his expression, he must know more than what he's willing to admit. 

It's fine. He understands. It's dangerous territory.

"You're missing all the celebration with your crewmates, come on!" Isak exclaims all of a sudden, grabbing Even's hand and then dragging him through the costume room. 

Even chuckles. "I don't care. You're all the celebration I need."

Isak stops dead in his track and turns to face Even, just so he can roll his eyes at him. "You- That's not true. Now stop making fun of me." 

"I'm not making fun of you. I'm teasing you, it's different."

"How is it different, exactly?"

"Well, making fun of you would be a bit mean. I don't want to be mean. I want to tease you. I want to keep you exactly like you look now."

"And what do I look like now?" Isak asks, arching an eyebrow at him the way he does when he thinks Even is being silly or dorky.

Even grins. "All flushed and cute."

Immediately, Isak lets go of him and brings his own hands to his cheeks, as if it would make the blush disappear. 

"Shut. Up," Isak bites his lower lip to try to stop himself from smiling too wide - in vain. "I thought we had already established I was handsome, stunning, beautiful, pretty, adorable but not- not that, too. Or whatever."

"And I thought we had already established you could be everything. This includes cute, too."

"We haven't established I could be _everything_ ," the smart-ass counters back with a proud smirk.

"Then I'm establishing it now." Even takes a step towards him and cradles his face into his hands, brushing his thumbs along Isak's cheekbones. "You're perfect, Isak, and you can be anything you want," he whispers a breath away from his lips. Isak's eyelids flutter shut for a second, he's almost melting between his hands. "How about that?"

Isak opens and closes his mouth multiple times, at a loss of words. In the end, he never gets to talk because Eskild calls for them from the hallway, letting them know the crew is moving to the bar. Even sighs and Isak almost looks as frustrated as him by the interruption. They both leave the costume room to join the crowd.

They barely manage to stay an hour at said bar though, before Even suggests they ditch and go home so they can hang out together in peace. He never said anything but the truth after all: Isak is all the celebration he needs.

***

It has taken Isak a couple of days until he realized what Even is doing. It was, especially, the last day of production that has made him realize that something is… very different compared to how they interacted and talked before.

But, after intensive research, he's now pretty sure what is happening - no matter how confusing that might be.

Even is flirting with him.

All the compliments, the attempts to always be close to Isak, to touch him at every possibility, even if it isn't quite necessary, the way Even just likes to spend his time around him no matter what else he is supposed to do, the fact that he's literally said that he prefers Isak's company over a party with his crewmates… there's not much room for doubt.

Once Isak has realized that, it takes him at least another two days to process and understand what it means.

So, he concludes that Even is flirting with him because… he _likes_ him. This makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, but it's literally the only conclusion Isak can come up with and the only one the internet gives him as well.

Isak also doesn't really understand what it means. Because there is Sonja and Even is supposed to get married to her in a couple of months. So, that clearly means Even likes, _loves_ , her. They've been in a relationship for years and years and getting married, as well as having babies, is obviously the next step for them. Isak understands that, it's what humans do, it's how they plan their lives.

But what he doesn't understand is how he fits into this picture now?

His role in this family used to be very clear: he was the robot Even and Sonja have acquired so that he would take care of their household for them, as they are both too busy to do it themselves. In the future, they might give him an upgrade to give him the capabilities to look after their kids, as well. But now, with this… this _thing_ between Even and him - how could this still be his role?

How is Isak supposed to look at Sonja knowing that her husband flirts with him? How is he supposed to entertain their kids knowing their dad likes him? How is he supposed to act normal when guests are coming over knowing he likes Even back?

After having another almost-system breakdown due to his overthinking, Isak has eventually decided to push these things away. These are questions he can ask Even when he has figured out what this _thing_ is exactly.

And Isak would very much like to figure it out.

Not only because he's a know-it-all (Eskild has called him that and while Isak would disagree on the details, it's still kind of correct), but also because it's intriguing.

He likes the way Even makes him feel, how he blushes all over (even if it should maybe be embarrassing that a few words from Even turn him into such a mess) while his system heats up, how he is tense and relaxed at the same time, how his heart rate, if he was human and had one, would probably also be at 130 bpm if he was leaning against Even.

What he doesn't like, though, is how Even just renders him completely speechless with his compliments, his banter and his flirting.

Isak doesn't have a comeback, not ever, not once. On a good day or if he isn't too flustered, he at least manages to call Even out a little bit. But bantering or flirting back is not something Isak knows how to do.

And how would he? That is really not something he was programmed to do.

But Isak wouldn't be Isak if he didn't find a way around that. So, for the past couple of days, Isak has spent hours watching some of those romantic bullshit movies that Even loves so much to pick up the necessary skills for flirting.

By now, Isak has watched about ten movies while doing his chores - but, of course, only during the times when Even wasn't home. He started with another one of Even's favorites - _Pretty Woman_ and after that, he moved on to watch _P.S. I Love You, Fools Rush In, Titanic, When Harry Met Sally, Notting Hill,_ and _The Notebook_. And then, just for good measure, because the heteronormativity (another word he knows from Eskild) was starting to get a bit confusing (even if he technically doesn't have a gender, his sex, in a human sense, is still male), _God's Own Country, The Way He Looks,_ and _Call Me By Your Name_.

He has no idea if any of the lines he has picked up will actually work or are any good but he likes them and he will just have to see how Even reacts to them. If he laughs at him, Isak can just stop right away and pretend nothing has happened.

*

The first line he has used is from _P.S. I Love You_ and the effect it had on Even was… captivating.

Isak has been holding on to Even's waist while he was on a ladder to hang up the freshly washed curtains - and it was the perfect time to drop the line from the movie. "I know what I want because I have it in my hands right now."

For seconds, Even has stayed perfectly still before he stepped down from the ladder to stare at Isak for several more seconds with his mouth agape and his eyes glistening with something - Isak couldn't pinpoint what exactly but it sent shivers down his spine. Eventually, Even went back up the ladder again, still speechless and flustered, and Isak quietly celebrated his first victory.

The next two times, he received similar reactions. Expect that when he quoted, "You give me premature ventricular contractions. You make my heart skip a beat", Even laughed a little and retorted that that was very _Isak_ of him. And when he told him that he was "everything I never knew I always wanted", Even choked.

But none of these reactions prepared Isak for what was going to happen once he would quote one of his favorite movies to Even.

It has started with Even shameless flirting with him while Isak was busy doing the laundry. Isak was already blushing all over, feeling hot inside and out, his system spinning and Even just wouldn't stop.

So, eventually, Isak blurts out: “I appreciate this whole seduction thing you've got going on here, but let me give you a tip: I'm a sure thing.”

Even gasps loudly and turns Isak towards him before he can hide behind the pile of dirty laundry again. He keeps a hold on him while opening and closing his mouth several times, trying to form words. But nothing comes and Isak grins bashfully, happy that his trick has once again worked perfectly.

"Did you just… that's a quote from Pretty Woman, Isak. Are you quoting one of my favorite movies to me and expect me to not realize?" Even says, his voice even deeper than usual and his eyes darker, like the deep end of the sea. It unsettles Isak but he doesn't know why exactly. "Wait… the other ones… Shit, Isak, have you been quoting movies to me this whole time?"

Isak blushes a bright pink again and tries to free himself from Even's grip - not really giving it his all, though, because he enjoys Even's touch far too much. "I… uhm… maybe?"

Even licks his lips before biting down on his lower lip. He's apparently trying to figure out what exactly is happening here. "You're flirting with me by quoting movie lines," he eventually states with another lick of his lip. "That's…" Isak will never know what it is because Even doesn't continue this thought. Instead, he starts smiling like an idiot.

And, even though it's confusing to him, Isak loves this smile so much that he just has to start to smile as well.

"You've been watching movies without me," Even says after they've smiled at each other for about two minutes. Isak almost wants to apologize but, before he can, Even continues: "I can't believe… You've watched movies to flirt with me. This is… Fuck, Isak, I can't even tell you about the things this does to me."

While Isak's blush deepens, Even's hands squeeze Isak's waist and stroke up his torso a little before they disappear.

Isak would very much like to hear about those things - but he doesn't dare to ask. So, instead, he continues to sort the laundry.

***

"Can we go dancing in a club, Even?"

It's the first thing Isak asks when Even comes home that day - he has barely gotten out of his jacket when Isak attacks him. But Isak was just unable to wait after his phone call with Eskild this morning.

He is too anxious to know Even's answer - and to, hopefully, go dancing with him.

When he has called Eskild earlier they talked about many things but eventually, Eskild has mentioned going dancing in some sort of club. And with that, he has caught Isak's attention. Because Isak enjoyed dancing - especially with Even - and they haven't done it in a while and he had no idea you could go somewhere for that.

So, he was eager to ask Eskild if anyone could go to that club (yes), if it would cost money to go there (depends on the club but usually not too much) and what kind of music they played (also depends on the club but mostly dance music).

Satisfied with the answers, Isak has made sure to hang up on Eskild as quickly as possible without being rude.

Ever since then, he's been waiting for Even to come home while pretending to get some chores done. To be quite honest, he hasn't managed to do more than washing the dishes and sorting the laundry.

When Even finally arrived home about two minutes ago, he has all but jumped into the hallway and blurted out his question.

And now, Even is looking at him - surprised, almost stunned, and very much confused. Isak is reciprocating his look anxiously. He is a bit scared that Even doesn't want to go dancing with him while being overly excited at the prospect of them dancing together.

Maybe Even has never been dancing in a club? Maybe that's something only Eskild would do? No, that doesn't make sense… if only Eskild would go dancing, there wouldn't be a whole (or maybe even more than one?) club. So, it's rather unlikely that Even has never heard of the concept - meaning that he's probably just confused because Isak has asked him about it.

"You know, Eskild told me about it," Isak thus explains to him, still all excitement and smiles and happiness. "We talked earlier on the phone and he has mentioned that he went dancing with a friend yesterday. So, I asked him about it and it sounds pretty cool… They have dance music and anyone can go… And I thought that maybe, we could do it one day? I mean… only if you want to, of course."

It could be that Even just doesn't want to go dancing with him, after all. Maybe that's why he's still looking at him with wide eyes and an open mouth. Because he doesn't want other people to see him dancing with his robot?

Within a second, Isak's excitement is gone and he recoils.

Of course, Even wouldn't want that. What if they meet another friend of Sonja's? Isak can still vividly remember his encounter with Bente. And meeting one of her friends while dancing with Sonja's fiancé would probably end up in a way bigger calamity.

For both of them.

Isak clearly didn't think this through, he was too excited about the idea to give it a real thought. He has let his new-found emotions run wild and that's what he gets for it.

"We can absolutely go dancing in a club, Isak."

His head jerks up so fast, Isak is afraid he has broken something for a second. Did Even just say that they can go dancing?

Even smiles at him widely, the surprise in his eyes is gone and he looks a little excited himself now. "Yeah?" Isak whispers, taking a step towards Even as if to check more closely that he actually means what he says and isn't just accepting for Isak's sake. "Are you sure? What about…?"

Before Isak can finish, Even has extended his arm to put his finger on Isak's lips to quiet him down. "I'm sure, Isak," he says with a grin. "I'm not sure you know what you're getting yourself into, though. But - you'll have to live with that."

Isak frowns because he has no idea what that means.

But, to be honest, he hasn't known what he's been getting himself into for days now. What he knows, though, is that it has brought him only good things so far. So why not continue to jump into things headfirst?

"I don't have to live with anything, Even, because I'm not a living thing," he decides to smirk back instead.

Even just rolls his eyes at him and then pinches his cheek.

And, wow, okay, that's a new one.

Once again, Isak can't do anything against the blush spreading across his face and he is glad that Even has the decency to turn away to take off his shoes and put his jacket away.

*

It is the next evening and they've just finished watching a movie, when Even suddenly gets up from the sofa. Grinning, he looks down at Isak. "Do you still want to go dancing with me?"

Isak frowns back at him in confusion and checks the time. It's already 10 pm and Even wants to go dancing. Now? What on earth? This club probably is already closed…

Nevertheless, he nods and stands up, too. "Okay, yeah… let's go, I guess?" He says as if he isn't completely confused by Even coming up with this now. "Do I have to change or something? I don't know… is there a dress code in dance clubs?"

Even laughs lowly. "Stop calling it a dance club, Isak. It's called a club or a disco. And no, you don't have to change. You look amazing, as always."

Blushing, Isak straightens his shirt. "You think?"

"You know that I think that, Isak, I've told you many times already," Even replies with a bright smile. "But, of course, if you want to change into a dress shirt or something, I won't stop you at all. I'm just saying you look good in anything, okay?"

Isak mumbles something under his breath - what, he doesn't even know himself - while he disappears into the guest room to pick fresh jeans and a grey dress shirt.

Once he is dressed, he goes into the hallway to put on his shoes and to wait for Even who apparently also went to change. He comes out of the bedroom some seconds later with styled hair, a tight black shirt and ripped jeans.

" _Woah_."

The sound, although embarrassing, probably best describes what Isak is thinking right now.

Even looks amazing.

Fortunately, he also pretends to not have heard Isak's sound as he crouches to pick out his shoes - even though Isak got a glimpse of the smuggest smile on his face. Isak just rolls his eyes a little while putting on his shoes.

About forty minutes later, they're standing in front of a building. It doesn't look like a place where people go dancing - but there is a queue of people waiting to get in.

Isak turns toward Even with a frown. "Are you sure this is where the dan- the club is, Even? It really doesn't look like it. There isn't even a sign or anything… Also, I don't understand why we're here at night? It's past 11 pm, surely, the club isn't open anymore?!"

"No, cutie, this is exactly where we're supposed to be," Even replies and wraps an arm around his shoulder. Isak's blush is massive and if he didn't know that it's impossible he would say that he's lighting up the dark street with it. "This is a club specifically for queer people, it's called _Elsker_ and it's probably the most famous club in Oslo. I promise you, you're going to love it here. And everyone will love your cute face."

***

Quite ironically, the last time Even has been to _Elsker_ , it was with Eskild, a couple of years ago. They had met not long before that and Eskild decided they needed to go out and drink their shitty day away - it was the first project they've worked on together, and it's been hell, but at least they didn't have to go through it alone. Back then, Eskild was still playing small parts and Even was an - far from being respected - assistant director. They had fun, that night. It's been worth it, even if Sonja made an overly dramatic scene about it when he got home tipsy at 5 in the morning. 

_Anyway_. Neither Sonja nor Eskild are relevant tonight - only Isak. Sweet, handsome, curious Isak who wants to go out and dance with _him_. Even still can barely believe it. He should send flowers to Eskild tomorrow to thank him for suggesting such a brilliant thing to Isak in the first place.

Getting in turns out to be fast enough (it's too early for the club to be overcrowded already) as well as easy (not to be pretentious, but Isak and he make quite a pleasurable pair for the eyes). Beside him, Isak still looks a bit confused by the time and the place but not uncomfortable, which is the most important. The second they step inside the club though, the loud music and the damp heat hitting them all at once, Isak darts to him with wide eyes. Even smiles back at him, hoping to show him it's normal and that everything's fine. It seems to do the trick, for Isak starts looking all around them as they slowly make their way through the small crowd until they are standing in front of the dancefloor area.

Isak's eyes travel from one corner of the room to the other, inspecting every single multi-colored spotlight flashing all over them. He takes his time, and once he's done with the material, he focuses his attention back on the other men of the club: some are ordering drinks at the bar, some are talking or flirting (who knows), and of course, some are dancing.

Even's observation of the room is interrupted by Isak, who puts a hand on his forearm. Immediately, Even checks on him, only to find his face millimeters away from him. His mouth is almost brushing against his ear when he points out to Even, loud enough over the music, "it's… It's a bit like Dirty Dancing. You know, the scene where Baby first sees the hotel's employees partying and dancing together."

Even chuckles at Isak's reference. "Sure. You could say that."

"So what now?"

"What now?" Even steps back but only so he can grab Isak's hand. "Now we dance," he smirks.

And so he takes Isak on the dancefloor, and soon they are dancing. It's different from what they are used to: it's a very different kind of music, it's also a different kind of dancing - for now. They aren't touching, just moving to the beat of the music as best as they can while standing in front of each other, eyes always locked together.

To be honest, Even is dying to reach out, to hold Isak against him like he's used to, but somehow, being in a room full of other people makes him more hesitant, almost shy. It's very different from the safety and privacy of their apartment. And Isak doesn't seem to be far more comfortable than him, judging by the frown creasing his forehead and the slightly awkward way he's moving - by now, he became better than this at dancing, Even has been lucky enough to witness him more than once.

Even has no idea how long they dance, but by the time he decides to look at something else than Isak, he realizes the club got a lot busier - warmer and louder, too. 

"I'm gonna get a glass of water, okay? Do you need anything?" Even asks, although he already knows the answer. As predicted, Isak shakes his head. "Alright. Can you stay on your own or-"

"I'm fine, Even," Isak cuts him off, which Even expected him to. Isak loves to remind Even how he can deal with everything by himself, always, even when it isn't necessarily true. But for now, Isak can certainly manage just fine.

So, Even walks away and waits for a simple glass of water for ten good minutes. For sure, waiting at the club's bar isn't something he will ever miss, even if the fresh water is a blessing once he gets to drink it. He feels better all of sudden, less nervous, and it's with the firm intention to properly invite Isak to dance in the middle of the crowded club that he goes back to where he left him.

Except, when he gets there, it's to some stranger talking to Isak, or more like, leaning way too close to him to whisper to him God knows what and to grin at him as if Isak gives a fuck - which he doesn't, it's written all over his face. Really, it doesn't exactly come as a surprise that Isak gets noticed and hit on as soon as Even walks away - he wasn't lying when he told Isak everyone would love his cute face. After all, Even is the biggest fan of said cute face. He knows it better than anyone else here.

Which doesn't mean he is okay with some random dudes bothering Isak. Maybe he could deal with the curious, very much interested looks other guys are throwing at Isak around them, but he is definitely not okay with them getting close when Isak and he already have plans. Together. The two of them. Not with annoying strangers.

So, Even makes a quick path to Isak, not wasting any more time.

"Hey, Isak! It's so busy, it took forever, I'm sorry," he says and then proceeds to wrap an arm around Isak's waist.

He can't help but smile at the way the stranger's face drops when he understands the situation before he walks away with a mumbled apology. His childish jubilation (because he admits it's what it is) is however short-lived. He needs to make sure Isak is alright.

"Was he bothering you?" He ends up asking, albeit the answer is quite obvious.

Isak shrugs. "I just didn't like that he touched me." At that, Even's blood boils with something between genuine concern and jealousy. As a reflex, he tries to give Isak some space, to drop the arm still wrapped around him, but Isak stops him. "It's fine," he assures him, nuzzling closer to prove his point. "He just squeezed my shoulder, it lasted a second before I stepped back." And then, like maybe Isak knows exactly what it would do to Even, he adds, "but the thing is, I only ever want _you_ to touch me."

Even almost dies right on the spot from the admission.

Isak doesn't seem to have time for him to recover though, because he brings their bodies properly together and then whispers in his ear with a soft but tempting voice, "come on, dance with me now."

Honestly, Even has no idea how his heart can take so much. But thankfully it does, and that's how he gets to dance with Isak the way he should have been since they arrived at the club, chests pressed together, arms wrapped around each other, and faces so close their noses are brushing. And in a way, it's even better than anything they've ever done, because as they try to stay in sync with the music, they have to move their hips, and in a matter of seconds, it turns into the sexiest, dirtiest thing they've ever done.

Maybe Even has died and gone to heaven, after all. Because surely there is no way this is real? There is no way Isak is actually _grinding_ against him?

Even can't tell when it happened, but soon he realizes Isak's hands are resting on his lower back, and so he takes it as an invitation to do just the same. Isak's face has shifted so they are dancing cheek to cheek, with Isak's delicious breath is tickling his neck. When Even hears a sigh, he almost loses it for good.

This is seriously getting out of hand.

"Thank you by the way," Isak says, taking Even off guard. 

"For… for what?"

For rescuing Isak from an intruding stranger? For dancing with him? For taking him here? None of these situations have been a hardship to Even, on the contrary, so thanking him seems useless.

Isak takes an abnormally long time to answer. And as he cuddles closer, as if there is any space left between them for it, and rests his head on his shoulder, Even slowly understands it's about much more than what's happening right now. It's about the journey, it's about all the changes Isak went through and how Even stayed by his side all the way through it. And if Isak is conscious of it, if Isak feels _thankful_ for it, it must mean something, right?

"Just…" Isak speaks again, stopping his train of thoughts. "Thank you for everything."

Even pulls back, or maybe Isak does, probably the both of them actually, but in any case, they both end up facing each other. Gently, Even raises a hand to cradle the left side of Isak's face, brushing a thumb over his cheek, stopping every time he grazes the corner of his lips, before repeating the motion. When he looks up at Isak's eyes, he's surprised to find that Isak is staring intensely at his lips like maybe he's thinking about it, maybe he's craving for it, to finally-

The moment is brutally interrupted when Isak is pushed into Even's chest by a drunk, stumbling guy who happened to be walking, or more like zigzagging, behind him. Thankfully, Even was here to catch Isak, welcoming him back into his arms, but then, that's when he notices it-

First, he hears it; Isak's muffled _moan_ as their bodies collide. 

And then he feels it, the way Isak bents his back so his hips are rolling against Even's, dragging more maddening sounds out of the both of them. His hands are desperately clutching at Even's shirt in two tight fists, holding on to him like he would crumble to the ground if he didn't. He shifts, and soon he's shamelessly rubbing his crotch against Even's leg, falling into a rhythm that clearly works for him.

The sight, the feeling, all of it takes all the oxygen away from Even's lungs. Right at this moment, he realizes how little he knows about robots, about robots' anatomy to be more specific, about _Isak_ 's body and what kind of sensations he can take from it. Because as clear and as real as life itself, right this second, he is witnessing Isak chasing pleasure from the sheer friction of their bodies grinding against each other.

"Hm. Sorry," Isak _whimpers_ all of sudden and pulls away as far as Even lets him, which is not very far. He then blinks at Even shyly, his face turning visibly crimson even under the chaotic spotlights. He looks like he's just woken up from some kind of trance. 

In Even's eyes, he looks absolutely delicious.

"Huh. It's okay, it's-"

"HELLOOOOO!"

And once again, their intimate moment is being rudely interrupted by yet another drunk troublemaker.

Except this time, they both know him. It's _Eskild._ It's goddamn Eskild jumping on them like a madman, completely oblivious to their proximity and what they were up to; or else, just not caring one bit, which sounds a lot like something Eskild would do, too.

"Fancy seeing you here my lovelies!" Eskild keeps yelling over the music, before proceeding to smack them a drooling kiss on their faces. Isak's annoyed groaned is loud and clear in answer, but Eskild brushes it off and instead swings his arms around their shoulders, separating the both of them from each other.

Even adores Eskild, but right now he's close to hating him with his whole being for this.

"Let's party together! Come on, boys! I'm so excited to see you two here, wow! Let's go!"

And obviously, Even can't really explain to Eskild why he would rather spend the rest of the night alone with Isak, therefore he can't do anything but agree, albeit reluctantly. Then he glances at Isak over Eskild's shoulder to check how he's doing on his side; turns out he looks just as resigned and pissed as Even feels. Still, he manages a small, timid smile when he notices Even's eyes on him.

It isn't what the night was offering them a few minutes ago but... If it's all they can get for now, then they will take it.

It's probably more than what they are allowed to anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think about this over 8k monster of flirting and teasing?  
> The touches, the tension? The dancing? Eskild cockblocking? ksksksks  
> What will happen now? And what about Sonja?


	10. slipp meg inn, jeg vil inn (let me in, I want in)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The honeymoon is over.  
> Someone goes through a cruel reality check and everything starts to fall apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, a huge THANK YOU for your response to this story and your heartwarming support!  
> We are really excited to share this chapter (as well as the next ones) with you guys. The plot is slowly taking a turn. Soon, you're gonna get all the answers to your questions... But at what cost? ;)  
> In the meantime, keep sharing your thoughts! It's the best thing for us <3 And it keeps us motivated and inspired, it's incredible.  
> Enjoy <3

Isak is basically walking on air for the next couple of days - with his head in the clouds and a smile plastered all over his face. And all he can really think about all day, every day is their night at the club. He keeps replaying small details in his mind over and over again because he just can't get enough of them.

Unfortunately, Even is pretty busy these days because there are some problems at work that he has to take care of. So, Isak is home alone most of the time and he hasn't had the chance to talk to Even much either.

Or to be close to him.

He misses being close to Even a lot and if he didn't have orders to go to rest at 7 pm every night (at least if Even isn't home to keep him busy in other ways than chores), he would stay up to wait for him - just to get a little squeeze or maybe a hug.

Today, it is just too much and Isak cannot focus on his tasks for a second. So, eventually, he decides to pick up the phone and call Even on his mobile to get a distraction and to- _ease the pain_. It still sounds weird to him to talk about all this feelings stuff in connection to himself but there is no denying anymore. This is what it is - he is hurting because he's missing Even.

"Did something happen?" Even asks as soon as he picks up the phone and Isak sinks back into Even's office chair. He hasn't thought about it - but of course, Even would think that something is wrong. He has never called him before. "Are you okay, Isak?"

Isak, with yet another blush forming on his face, rushes to calm Even down: "I'm fine… It's not… There is no reason to worry, okay? I just… uhm… well, I - I _miss you_ , okay?"

There is silence on the other end of the line and Isak's blush deepens. Maybe he shouldn't have said that. Maybe that isn't appropriate to say, especially not for a robot. He doesn't know - it's not like there is a manual for this that he can download. Because something like this has never happened before, to any robot, ever.

Eventually, Even takes a deep breath and there is - at least Isak imagines there to be - a heavy, longing sigh, as well. "I miss you too, Isak. I'm sorry I'm not home much… I will be here until late today again. But I hope that I can be home early tomorrow."

"Okay," Isak whispers. "Tomorrow sounds good."

They manage to talk for another thirty minutes before Even gets called away by one of his colleagues and they have to hang up.

Reluctantly, Isak goes back to work. He has hoped that talking to Even for a bit would make him feel better. But, in reality, he might even feel worse now. It doesn't make sense because when you miss someone, talking to that someone should make you feel better - and yet, it apparently doesn't. All he wants, still, is for Even to be sitting on the kitchen counter, talking to him, while Isak is doing the dishes or preparing dinner.

When Sonja comes into the kitchen an hour later, Isak isn't only surprised - as it is way too early for her to be home already - but also not prepared. He hasn't finished half of the tasks he was supposed to do today.

Sonja will probably be really mad at him - and there is no excuse.

" _Adrian 2121_ ," Sonja calls to him and Isak almost doesn't react to it because he isn't used to this name anymore. It feels like it's been ages since the last time he talked to Sonja - and Sonja is the only one still calling him that. Everyone else just calls him by his name, his _actual, real_ name and not his serial number. "What the hell is going on here? Have you seen the state the flat is in? Did you do nothing all day?"

Isak takes a step back until he feels the counter against his back and realizes he can't move further away from his owner. "No, I didn't…" He stutters, pressing as far back against the counter as he can - because Sonja looks fucking scary like this. "I mean… I did… I did the dishes and the laundry and-"

"You mean the laundry that is still in the washing machine, probably for hours now?" Sonja interrupts him, her voice loud and piercing.

"Uhm, well… I think…" Isak blushes a deep red. He just wants to disappear before Sonja will get really mad. "Maybe I forgot about it? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to… I was just so busy with other things and…"

Sonja grunts. "Other things like what, huh? As far as I can see, you haven't finished any of the tasks you were supposed to take care of today! And this is not the first time in the past weeks that I come home to unfinished tasks. What exactly are you so busy with that keeps you from doing the things you should be doing? You know the only reason you're here is to take care of these things and yet you don't do them!"

There is literally no more space for Isak to go and Sonja is towering over him like a menace, ready to attack at any moment.

It should be ridiculous because Isak is tall, way taller than her, and he has far more strength than her, too. He even has special programming for fights and stuff - the only problem with all of that is, that he can use none of these things against his owners. Never, under any circumstances can he harm Even or Sonja in any way.

So, if Sonja actually wants to harm him, there is nothing Isak can do about it.

"I'm really sorry. I was just… uhm, I-" Isak wants to tell her a lie, he has the lie already formed - he had to update and it took longer than planned because there were problems with the wifi - but he just can't say it out loud. He cannot lie to his owners, it is impossible. So, again, he goes for a vague statement. "I was just a little distracted today."

"Distracted?" Sonja hisses, cornering him even further between her body and the kitchen counter. "You're a robot, what the hell can you be distracted by?"

Within a second Isak blushes a deep crimson. He can't, _doesn't want to_ , tell her, but he has to. He has to tell her that her fiance was the one distracting him. All hell would break loose if he tells her, Isak knows that. But what else is he supposed to do?

"By… Even. I was distracted by Even."

Momentarily, Sonja loses her anger and stares at Isak. It's the weirdest look - it feels like she has known all along that Even was the reason but she is shocked to hear it nevertheless.

Once she regains her composure, she's back at staring Isak down. "By Even? How is that? Even isn't here!"

"I know… I've uhm… I called him earlier and we talked for a bit. So yeah…," Isak mumbles, too scared to say it in a loud and clear voice. "But don't worry, I'll get everything done now, okay? I'll do it, I can stay up and do it…"

"Stay up, so that you can be distracted by my fiance again, is what you mean," Sonja almost shouts. "I really don't think so. You're going to do as much as you can now - and you better hurry the fuck up, and then you're going to plug yourself in at your usual time. No arguments. I can't believe I actually have to argue with you, you little shit. What, do you have a virus or something?"

By now, Isak feels so awful that he just wants to run to Even's office and lock the door behind him until Sonja has to leave for her next shift.

But he can't, so he just curls further into himself, trying to make himself as small as possible. "No, I'm sorry… I didn't mean to do that… I promise I'll do everything you wanted me to do. Please, I'm really so sorry, Sonja."

Suddenly, Isak feels a sharp pain on his left cheek. He doesn't understand why - until he sees Sonja holding her hand, clearly in pain herself. "Fuck, that fucking hurt… I didn't think you'd be so… but of course, you are, you're just a pile of metal and cables!" She curses. Then she stops and stares at Isak. "How dare you? You're not allowed to call me that! Don't you dare to ever do that again, you bratty little machine! You little shit… you're fucking defective, aren't you? You must be, no robot would ever act like this. Fuck!"

Isak just stares blankly, not really taking in anything she says. He puts his hand to his cheek, confused.

This isn't supposed to hurt, he isn't supposed to feel physical pain. The only thing that should've happened was his sensors sending information to his CPU that someone has hit him so that he can take countermeasures.

And yet - Isak's cheek is throbbing with pain, it's paralyzing him, he isn't even capable of thinking about countermeasures. And while he's numb with pain, there is still one word that he can't stop repeating to himself in his mind over and over and over again.

_Defective._

Sonja is still raging, probably screaming at him, but Isak can't hear her.

Then, all of a sudden, it's quiet.

Isak looks up and realizes Sonja is gone. A second later he hears the door being slammed shut. It's relieving - until Isak notices that his vision is blurred. Confused, he moves his hand from his cheek to his eyes; and there he feels wetness.

Isak is… he's crying?!

He has no idea how or why this is happening, but he is crying. It's so disturbing, he cries even more. He cries himself into a sobbing hysteria as if he was a human child being chastised by his parent.

After several minutes, Isak manages to calm himself down enough to gather his thoughts a little.

But even his thoughts are a mess, overrun by emotions.

He is hurting, everything hurts - so much - and Isak just wants to dig himself a hole (preferably out of Even's clothes) where he can hide in until all of this stops.

Until he doesn't have to feel things anymore.

Because if this is what feelings entail, he doesn't fucking want it.

He thought that all the things he feels when he is with Even were good, great, _amazing_ \- but this, this is awful. He doesn't want this.

If being able to feel means he also has to endure this, he'd rather not feel anything at all.

Quickly, Isak dries his eyes with the tea towel before he looks around, trying to focus on his tasks, trying to figure out what he should do next. It's hard to push the pain away, to hide it in some far-off corner of his CPU where it is only background noise, but eventually, he manages.

Prioritizing the tasks he still has to do actually helps him with pushing away his feelings, with acting like a proper robot again.

A robot that doesn't have feelings, especially not for his owner. A robot that doesn't have to get smacked because he's useless at his job.

And when he stops in front of Even's office on the way to the bathroom, leaning his head against the door for a minute, it doesn't have to mean anything and also, no one has to know about it, not ever.

***

At first, Even gets the weird idea that Isak is playing a joke on him. It's the most rational explanation he can come up with because everything else makes no sense to him at all. 

Yesterday, they were fine. Better than fine actually, since Isak made the spontaneous decision to call him at work to tell him he missed him. Even has spent the rest of the day on a cloud, all dreamy and excited at the idea of getting home and seeing Isak. And although, as expected, he couldn't make it home before Isak's usual sleep time, he knew that the next day, he could make the necessary arrangements to be there earlier so they could finally spend time together.

The prospect got him through his day of boring talks and unnecessary post-production negotiations with the studio. He hated wasting his time on technicalities and arguments over what the best profits strategies are - his job is to make films, not money -, it would usually put him into such a shitty mood, but today, it's like he was bulletproof: nothing could hit him, nothing could hurt him. 

Nothing, that is, except Isak.

Even ran home, got slightly disappointed when Isak didn't meet him in the hallway like he did recently, but those were details, so he shrugged it off and went looking for him instead. He found Isak in the kitchen; he seemed to be busy cooking Sonja's take away meals for the next few days, judging by the containers sitting on the kitchen table, waiting to be filled and then placed either in the fridge or the freezer.

That's when everything turns to shit.

"Good afternoon, sir," he hears Isak welcome him. Even snorts. He hasn't heard Isak calling him that in months. It's something he's never gotten used to, but now more than ever, it has the same effect on him than nails scratching on a chalkboard. Isak must be messing with him, though, so he walks over to him and wraps his arms around his waist, hugging him from behind.

"Hi, Isak," he whispers right into his ear, making sure his lips are brushing along the shell. "I missed you."

But Isak doesn't react like he was expecting him to: his body remains perfectly stiff, he doesn't lean back on Even, doesn't snuggle closer into his arms, doesn't even shiver at his words. 

And then he says, "sir. I'm holding a knife, it isn't safe for you. Please, could you step back?"

Isak doesn't sound like Isak at all, he sounds like Adrian 2121. His voice is monotonous, devoid of any kind of emotions, perfectly empty. A ball of worry forms in Even's stomach, slowly turning into panic… He has a very bad feeling about the whole situation.

Yet, desperate, he tries one more time. "Isak? What are you playing at? Is it… Are you messing with me? Is it a prank?" He forces a laugh to support his words like maybe it would make his theory real; but it's weak even to his ears, he has barely managed to get out a chuckle. 

At first, Isak doesn't react. The silence is loud in the kitchen, borderline awkward, which hasn't happened between them for so long that Even almost forgot there was a time when Isak and him could barely communicate. It felt like a different life. 

But this different life seemed to be merging with theirs for no reason, and Even doesn't like it at all.

Slowly, Isak starts moving again. He puts the knife he's been holding down on the chopping board, and then his hands find Even's, still resting on Isak's hips since Even's brain has been too busy trying to make sense of the whole situation to remember that Isak has asked him to step back. 

Naively, hope blooms inside Even's chest when Isak grabs Even's wrists. It's a joke. It was all a joke, right? And now Isak is touching him, he will soon turn around and hug him and everything is going to be fine.

Nothing is fine.

Isak moves Even's hands and arms away from his body, pushing him away gently but not tenderly, not like Isak would do with Even, but rather like a robot with its overly invasive owner would. Even takes a few steps back, finally giving Isak space, feeling stupid and utterly lost. Is it a bad dream? Is he in the middle of a living nightmare? 

Can he wake up now?

"Isak, what's going on?" He asks, panic clear in his voice. Isak turns around.

When their eyes meet, Even sees nothing and all his fears are abruptly confirmed. This isn't Isak he has standing in front of him: this is Adrian 2121. With his straight posture, his impassive facial expression and his eyes devoid of any life.

How is it even possible? Twenty-four hours ago, Isak was calling him on the phone because he was missing him. Hell, just a few days ago, they were dancing together at a club at Isak's request, he had Isak wrapped into his arms, grinding on his leg, whimpering the most beautiful sounds in his ear, for fucks sake! It's been real, Even didn't make up any of it.

So what happened?!

"I'm busy cooking your and Sonja's meals for your lunch breaks at work, sir," Isak replies eventually. 

"What? Mine?"

"Yes, sir. It's part of my duties."

Even almost loses it right then and there. Or maybe he does. "No, it's not. You don't cook my meals anymore," he argues. "I'm always distracting you until you let me do it myself, or neither of us ends up cooking anything and I just buy myself a cheap sandwich at the vending machine of the studio, which I don't mind because it means we were busy spending time together."

Isak stares at him like he's talking nonsense. 

"Remember, Isak? That's what we do. We hang out, we watch movies, we talk, we joke, we dance, we go out, we hug and we almost-" Kissed, Even wants to say but stops at the last second. Maybe he made it all up. Maybe Isak never meant to kiss him back at the club, right before Eskild interrupted them.

For half a second, Even is certain he sees a glimpse of Isak inside those dull eyes. It's gone in a blink, but it's something he can work with, it's hope, while he figures out what the hell happened to Isak during his absence.

But then, Isak speaks again and everything shatters. His hopes, his memories, his heart. Mostly his heart. "Sir, it was a mistake."

Even doesn't ask him what he means by that, it's useless. 

Even doesn't hold him back either when he leaves the kitchen, it's pointless.

Isak is gone.

***

The next few days, Even can't bring himself to accept the situation as it is now, can't give up so easily on Isak, on what they've built together. So once he's recovered from the initial shock, he goes back to trying to get a genuine reaction out of Isak. 

But so far, it's been fruitless. And the harder and the longer Even tries, the more closed-off and distant Isak gets, avoiding his gaze, turning his back on him, barely answering him except for his repetitive "I don't understand, sir". No, really, he gets nothing from his desperate attempts to reconnect with the boy he's grown to know and adore. Isak is back at being a blank, emotionless robot and Even has yet to understand how it happened.

That is, until Sonja, Isak and him end up in the same room and Even stops being so ridiculously blind to the obvious. 

Thinking back on it, he realizes he should have figured it out a long time ago already. But it takes Isak flinching whenever Sonja speaks to him, every time it's a bit too strained, a bit too loud, for him to connect the dots: Isak is scared of Sonja. And although Isak's never been treated kindly by Sonja - to say the least, he's never shown any sign of being particularly afraid of her. Not like he is now, even with his robot-like behavior.

Sonja has done something to him, and if Isak won't talk to Even about it, then he will go straight to the bully. For someone who's been incapable of being honest and direct with the person he's been living with for years, with his fiancée, it's surprisingly easy for him to make that decision. 

Witnessing Isak jump once again and then almost hug the walls to get out of the kitchen after Sonja ordered him to leave them alone, also contribute greatly to piss Even off so much that he's unable to hold back any longer. He needs to have a word with her, and right now.

"Isak has been acting weird lately. You wouldn't know something about it, would you?" Even blurts out, not tiptoeing around it. He's done wasting time on pleasantries with her.

Of course, Sonja's first reaction is the same as always: she acts like he's being ridiculous. "I didn't know robots could act… what is that you said? Oh, right, weird. Also, I thought we agreed on not calling it Isak."

"We didn't agree on anything, ever," he snaps back. Sonja finally looks up at him. At least it got her attention. "Did something happen between you two while I was working?"

She huffs, grabs her cup of coffee and takes forever to take a microscopical sip of it, just to make him wait for her answer. "It doesn't ring a bell. And I don't see why something would've happened. Do you have a specific reason in mind?"

It makes Even pause. He knows Sonja well enough to know when she's being passive-aggressive and when she obviously has something on her mind, something that is pissing her off. She's just been waiting for the right moment to throw it at his face.

"Sonja. I know something happened. Cut the bullshit."

She glares at him and then drops her cup loudly on the table. Her eyes are cold on him, but it does nothing to him anymore. She might be mad at him for whatever reason but Even is furious.

"I don't know, Even, maybe what you're calling 'weird' for your stupid robot is simply said robot finally being back at completing the tasks it's been fabricated to do, and not wasting time by hanging out with you."

So she knows. Clearly not all the details, or Isak wouldn't even be here anymore, but she knows they've been… hanging out. "Sonja, what did you say to him?!"

"I just reminded the Goddamn robot where its real place is, alright?! I didn't buy it to be your friend, I didn't buy it for you to talk more with a machine than with me."

"So you're jealous?!" 

To be fair, she has every right to be. Even did spend more time with Isak than with her, talked to him way more than with her. Actually, he pretty much did everything more with him than with his fiancée.

But it wasn't a reason to take it on Isak. He wasn't responsible for their failed relationship.

"I'm not jealous of a piece of metal, Even, don't be ridiculous." And here we go again. "I'm mad because you're still not taking our relationship seriously. You're not taking me seriously, and I'm sick of feeling like I have to beg to get your attention."

Once again, she isn't wrong regarding their relationship, regarding Even himself. But it isn't the point. Even couldn't care less about them right now. What he needs to know, is what Sonja has said or done to Isak for him to withdraw completely, so hopefully Even can find a way to make it better.

"Sonja. What did you do to him?"

"Can you forget about your toy for a second and-"

"Stop, Sonja. What the fuck did you do to him? What happened?!"

"I slapped him, alright?! I called him defective, and- I don't even remember, Even, I just lost my temper! He told me he didn't do his tasks because he was busy calling you and then he had the nerves to call me by my name! This is on you, Even. Not me!"

For a while, Even is so shocked that he remains speechless. He's staring at Sonja, the woman he's known since he was fifteen and he doesn't recognize her anymore. She's a lot of things, but she isn't violent. And yet, from her own words, she just admitted she slapped Isak. His Isak. Who's sweet and kind and would never hurt anyone on purpose. 

All of sudden, the only thing he can think about, the only thing he can picture in front of him is Isak trying to explain why he couldn't finish some stupid, pointless household task on time and Sonja striking him for doing something as insignificant and harmless as calling her by her name. He called her Sonja because she's a human being and she has a name. She called him defective and who knows what else because she couldn't see him as anything else than a thing.

It's so unfair, it makes Even so angry he's ready to take Isak and leave forever. Right now.

But then, Sonja opens her mouth again.

"Stop looking at me as if I'm a monster, Even! That's what you don't seem to understand."

"And what do I not understand exactly, hm?!"

"I help women giving birth, Even," she says and for the first time since the beginning of their argument, she sounds more desperate than angry. "That's my job. I hold babies in my arms; living, breathing, tiny human beings who are made of flesh and bones and have feelings. I can hear them breathing for the first time. I can hear them cry when it happens, because it hurts, because they have real, genuine sensations and emotions." She seems on the edge of tears, and if it wasn't for the shocking memory of her admitting she hurt Isak, he would probably stand up and comfort her. "But robots… They aren't real, living individuals. They don't have feelings. They are very elaborated computers disguised as humans. What you call Isak like it's anything close to the innocent, living beings I'm bringing to life, I- I can't, Even. It makes no sense to me. I don't think it makes sense to anyone else but you, do you realize that?"

Even can only blink at her in surprise, only listens to her helplessly as she tries to make him understand her state of mind. But he doesn't get it. Not entirely. Her words make sense as far as babies do, but Isak not being his own person, not being capable of feeling in his own way - this is something he won't ever agree on with her. He's seen it. Isak is closer to being a human being than a lot of people he's met in his life. He's as real as the next person.

"I'm not proud of what I did, I swear I'm not," Sonja resumes speaking, her voice soft as if she's speaking to one of her precious babies. She's leaning over the table and offering her hand to Even as a peace offering. "I didn't like slapping your- Isak, no matter what you think. But I won't apologize for it. I won't apologize to a robot. It- He wouldn't even understand what I'm doing. He doesn't feel pain, he doesn't have a conscience, remember?"

Even looks down at the hand, at the very hand Sonja has probably used to slap Isak, to hurt him, and all he feels is disgust. He can't bear the single idea of touching her.

"You disgust me," he hears himself saying. 

Sonja's eyes widen at his words and she withdraws her hand. She looks so taken aback, almost like she's the one having been slapped this time. Except no one but her would go this far. Even would never. Isak would never. Only her.

Then, all of sudden, her face turns hard and cold. "Fine. Then go fuck yourself, Even."

And without another word, she storms out of the flat.

***

Isak doesn't know how to do this anymore.

He thought, going back to being a proper robot, to not feel anything, would be easy and that he would just be like he was before Even _changed_ him.

But it's really nothing like that at all.

When he is taking care of his chores, Isak manages alright. He can tune out the thoughts about Even and how he'd rather be watching a movie with him. But as soon as he is less busy, it takes all his willpower to push the feelings and thoughts away. It takes him everything he has not to turn to Even and hide in his strong embrace.

What makes all of it significantly more difficult is Even.

Even who is trying so hard to reach out to Isak over and over again. Even who doesn't understand at all what is happening. Even who just wants to go back to how things used to be between them, who just wants _Isak_ back. Even who is obviously hurting so much that Isak can feel it too.

And that's really something Isak doesn't understand. Why it is hurting him when Even is hurting. How is that even possible? How can he feel someone else's pain as if it was his own?

This whole feelings business is really getting to a level where he can't follow anymore.

Isak doesn't want Even to be hurt and he also doesn't want to be hurting himself. And least of all, he wants to be the one who is hurting Even. He isn't even sure which of these options is bothering him the most. Though, it is probably Even hurting. Isak would definitely do anything to stop it, to make Even feel better again - if only he knew how.

Okay, technically he does know. He knows that all Even wants is for him to stop acting like a robot again.

But he can't do that. And every time Sonja speaks to him, he is reminded as to why. He flinches every time, terrified that she will hit him again. And even when he has resolved himself to not feel things anymore and succeeds in doing so in mostly every other part, he can't stop feeling scared of her.

And on top, he is scared of what else she might do to him if he dares as much as look Even's way.

He can only guess what she's capable of once she finds out the whole truth about all the things Even and he have been doing. Because by now Isak knows, he _knows_ , what they did isn't something that is normal, innocent and friendly. He knows he was about to kiss Even at the club (and maybe even more than that) and that Even would've willingly complied. But he also knows that Sonja has every right to be furious about that because that is something Even should be doing with her, not with their robot.

Isak knows he's the one who is in the wrong here - and yet it doesn't feel like that.

Because being close to Even and feeling all these things he feels when he is with Even, when he talks to him, when he just as much as looks at him, feels so right that it simply can't be wrong.

But he has to remember that he can't have these things. He has to remember that he is nothing more than a defective machine that is acting up, is stepping out of line, is fooling around like a human teenager. He is trespassing on grounds that he has no rights walking on and he is clearly not doing the things it is supposed to be doing.

So, as much as it is hurting both of them, Isak has to reject Even over and over again.

He just really hopes that Even will understand eventually; and forgive him.

But, seeing Even's face, when Isak has to turn him down yet another time, makes him very unsure of whether that will happen or not.

It happens a couple of days after Sonja hit him - earlier, he has heard them screaming at each other after Sonja asked him to leave the kitchen, and then, eventually, the apartment door has been slammed shut once again (apparently that was now a common occurrence in this house) - and it must be Even's hundredth try by now.

He comes up to Isak carefully while Isak is busy dusting the furniture in the living room. Isak feels Even's presence in the room immediately but he refrains himself from turning around and giving him all his attention, even though that's really all he wants to do.

"Isak," Even says with his softest voice. But underneath Isak can hear the pain. He can hear the sleepless nights, the tiring arguments with Sonja, the hopelessness, the feeling of being at a loss and out of ideas of what else to do; everything. And it's like a knife ripping through his rib cage. "Isak, can you please look at me?"

If only he didn't have to - because he knows the sight of Even will be another image hunting him whenever he is not busy.

But he has to and so Isak turns around, avoiding Even's gaze by looking at his shirt wrinkling a little over his left shoulder. "Yes, sir?" He replies in a robotic voice. "Is something the matter, sir? Am I doing it wrong or do you want me to do something else?"

There is silence for a moment and Isak can almost feel the sadness in the air around him. It would only take him one _"Even, I'm sorry"_ to push it all away but he can't. 

Instead, he waits for Even.

"Yes. Yes, I want you to take a walk with me," Even whispers eventually. "The weather is quite nice and… we could talk… you know?"

Isak bites his lips hard and slowly turns away. He can't look at Even when he says what he has to say: "I'm sorry, sir. I can't really do that… Madam has left me a lot of tasks that I have to finish today. I do not have time for useless walks."

Maybe it's his imagination but he thinks he can hear Even repeat the word "useless" in a low voice, questioningly, brokenly.

Quickly, Isak gets back to his tasks before the tears forming in his eyes will start to spill over and betray him. He can't risk Even seeing them and realizing that all of this is just an act to keep him away.

When Isak dares to look up again, he can see Even in the mirror above the bookcase he's currently dusting. Even looks devastated, broken. There are tears in his eyes as well, and he is standing in the middle of the room, unmoving.

Eventually, he shrinks in on himself and turns around to leave Isak. 

***

_I need a drinking buddy. Care to join me?_

As the loyal best friend that he is, Mikael shows up about twenty minutes later, bursting into the bar with worry written all over his face. He looks across the room, eyes searching, before spotting Even, who's sitting at the bar with a glass in front of him.

Immediately, Even empties what's left of his drink in one gulp, then gestures at the bartender for another one. Actually two. As soon as Mikael sits down beside him, he offers him the second glass filled with a brown liquid. 

"Is it whiskey? What kind of cliché Tarantino movie are we in?!" Mikael scoffs.

"It's not whiskey. It's rum," Even corrects him.

"Oh, then it changes everything!" Even ignores his indignation and takes a large sip of his drink. "Dude, what's going on? Is it about the movie? Did the studio call? I didn't hear about any issue, what-"

"It's not the movie," Even interrupts him. Being upset over a movie feels like such an absurd and pointless thing right now. "I don't care about the movie."

It makes Mikael pause, taken aback. To be fair, they've known each other for almost ten years now and never once did Mikael hear his best friend "not care" about anything movies related. For a very long time, the only thing that Even has seemed to ever care about was his career. And even then, Even doesn't remember ever feeling so miserable that he would feel the need to go out to some random bar and drink. If he felt upset or frustrated, he would spend hours ranting to who would be willing to listen to him (usually, Mikael). If he felt particularly hopeless… he wouldn't get out of bed. But getting drunk in a bar? It's a first.

"Okay," Mikael says slowly, carefully. "So is it about Sonja? About the wedding?"

Even lets out of a bitter laugh. "The last thing Sonja told me today is, _go fuck yourself, Even,_ so I'm not sure about our wedding happening anytime soon."

" _What_?!"

"In her defense, I did tell her she disgusted me so…"

Even takes another sip of his drink, and this time Mikael imitates him. It seems to be a bit too much for him.

"What the hell happened?"

It's a difficult question to answer. Because Even wouldn't be sitting in this bar if it weren't for his last disastrous attempt at a real conversation with Isak, that's for sure. But if he's being honest with himself, if he's analyzing the whole issue properly, everything really started to go downhills a long time ago. Before Isak even showed up in his life.

Probably around the time-

"I fell out of love with Sonja."

Surprisingly, or maybe not, Mikael doesn't seem very shaken by the admission. He doesn't say it, but his entire face is screaming at him, _no kidding, genius_.

"So you two broke up?"

Even huffs. Not even close, and the fact they still didn't sound ridiculous even to him. It makes no sense. "Nope."

Mikael groans, brings his glass to his lips but stops and puts it down on the bar before drinking anything. "You're not telling me everything." He looks like he just went through some kind of divine revelation. "You've always known you didn't love Sonja anymore, you just didn't care enough to break up with her. That and the fact she's been manipulating you for years and you've always been aware of it, too, but you're so scared of being… unlovable, that you've put up with it so far. So what happened? What changed the dynamic?"

Sometimes, it scares Even how well his best friend seems to know him. Because if Mikael knows him that well, if he knows all of his flaws, how can he still be his friend? And that question alone proves Mikael's point to perfection. Even has always been scared of loneliness. Scared of not being good enough. Scared of not being worthy of anyone's love. Sonja hasn't loved him for a long time either, but she's a stubborn woman, and so she wasn't ready to give up on years of trying to change him and make him who she wants him to be. She's been very close to succeeding, actually, if it hadn't been for her biggest mistake yet: bringing Isak into their lives.

Because then, Even fell in love with someone else. With _him_.

That's what really happened.

But he can't tell Mikael, can he? And what's the point anyway? Isak doesn't want anything to do with him anymore. Whatever they had - it's broken. Isak doesn't want it, doesn't want _him_ no more. And there is nothing he can do about it.

"Even?" Mikael calls softly, pulling him out of his thoughts. "Are you okay?"

 _No_. _I miss him_. "Yes. Or, I will be. It's whatever, you know us, we fight and make up all the time."

"What, even this time?"

Mikael sounds almost disappointed. It's fair, Even feels ashamed by his own words. He doesn't want to make up with Sonja, not after what she did to Isak. He just… doesn't know what else he's supposed to do. He's stuck between a fiancée he can barely look at anymore and a boy he's enamored with but who doesn't know what love is in the first place.

This is madness.

"I don't know. I guess we will see."

Even finishes his drink, then gets his wallet and leaves a bunch of bills on the bar. 

When he stands up, Mikael grabs him by the arm. "Even, wait!"

"What?"

"What about Isak?"

It throws Even off balance. How does Mikael know about that, too? He never said a word. But maybe that's not what he means, maybe-

"What about him?" He decides to fake ignorance.

Mikael squints his eyes at him, the way he does when he can see right through his lies. Silence stretches between them. Even doesn't realize he sat back on his stool until Mikael puts a hand on his knee and squeezes it gently.

It reminds him of Isak, except it feels nothing like Isak's touch. 

_I miss him. I want him back. I-_

"Even, please, just be careful with…" He pauses, the name is loud between them, but ultimately, remains unspoken. "With your feelings," Mikael settles for, instead.

It's too late for that though, Even knows nothing's ever going to be the same again. He lost something he has been waiting for his whole life - something genuine, something selfless, something healing - and he knows he won't ever feel the same way again for anyone.

It's a one-time thing in life.

There is no point in telling Mikael about it though, so he lies and fakes a smile. "Sure, I will. Like I always do."

Rightly so, Mikael doesn't believe a word of it but nods anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... please don't kill us?
> 
> OKAY but for those of you who know us, you knew all the fluff couldn't last! But we will make it worth it, promise :')  
> (Or maybe not. Maybe more angst is coming. Who knows? Not you, clearly, hehe)
> 
> So Sonja is back at the front scene in this chapter and it doesn't turn well for Isak...  
> Isak is hurting, Even is getting rejected and y'all probably hate us.  
> It was very interesting to write the argument between Sonja and Even because you finally get to know more about Sonja's state of mind, why she's been acting the way she did all along. What are your thoughts on it?  
> Things aren't looking good for Isak and Even though... should Even listen to Mikael and be extra careful with his feelings? Or should he keep fighting for Isak? Did he lose Isak forever? 
> 
> See you next week. Lots of love <3


	11. det er magi (it is magic)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sonja thinks it's time for them to think about their relationship. Even agrees but gets distracted before he can even begin to evaluate their situation. Isak discovers the best thing in the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wooooow, guys, thank you all so much.  
> It's really amazing, the feedback we get for this... we appreciate it so much. We really cannot believe we already got over 300 kudos on this story.  
> Thank you, guys, you're the best. Keep it up! <333

Almost two days have passed since his fight with Sonja, his last sad attempt at reconciliation with Isak and his miserable drinking party with Mikael. Ever since the apartment has been bathed in a gloomy atmosphere, everyone is walking on their tiptoes to keep quiet, like guilty ghosts trying to be as discreet as possible. Even has barely seen Sonja, only running into her in the morning when he's getting ready to leave for work and she was coming back from her night shifts. Thankfully, she was too eager to run to bed to stop and say a single word to him - or Isak, for that matter - so Even's " _you disgust me_ " and Sonja's " _then go fuck yourself, Even_ " remain the last words they've exchanged.

This morning, Even woke up in such a shitty mood that he was ready to hop in the shower and then leave straight away. He had no desire to see Sonja nor suffering through an awkward and painful breakfast with Isak still acting like a robot. The situation was weighing on him so much he could barely sleep at night and he couldn't wait to get out of the flat. Boring post-production meetings at work have never sounded so sweet to him.

But the second Even steps into the kitchen and spots Isak, his escape plan falls apart. No matter how emotionless and cold Isak acts around him, Even can't bring himself to ignore him nor the fact Isak has made breakfast for him (French toast and fresh fruits, from the look of it), all of it already served on the table and waiting for him with a cup of steaming coffee. Even more so, no matter if Isak greets him with another "good morning, sir," which drives Even a bit more mad every time he hears it. 

He will have to suffer through it, then, since he's too weak to treat Isak with anything else but respect and utter care. It doesn't feel like such a bad thing anyway. On the contrary.

So, Even eats his breakfast in silence while Isak starts on the dishes, cleaning up the bowl, the whisk and the frying pan he's used for the French toasts, indifferent to the longing looks Even is throwing at him. He must be the most pathetic sight, chewing on his baked toasts without tasting anything, too distracted to focus on anything else but the other man in the room, like a distraught lover… or a lovesick loser.

Once Even's done, Isak clears the table, taking his plate and the cutlery to clean. At the same time, Even hears the front door open and then slam shut. He sighs; so much for avoiding Sonja this morning, too.

"Oh, you're here, perfect! We need to talk! I talked to my parents on the phone." Are the first words she speaks, or more like proclaims loudly, as soon as she finds him in the kitchen.

Even's eyes are still mostly focused on Isak though, and he doesn't miss how Isak's body flinches at her voice. It physically pains Even to see him react so strongly to her presence, and he almost feels sick from it. How did he fail so hard to protect Isak from her? 

But it only gets worse. Isak is startled so hard that the plate slips out of his hands and hits the kitchen counter, and ultimately breaks on the floor. The incident catches Sonja's attention and she turns around, forgetting about Even altogether. And Even knows by the way she glares at Isak, who falls on his knees to pick up the pieces of the shattered plate in panic but recoils as far away from her as possible as if he's expecting her to strike him at any second, that she's going to take it out on him again. When it comes to Sonja, _I got my parents on the phone_ never means anything positive. He's 100% certain she was upset when she walked into the room, and she won't hesitate to make a big deal out of Isak's mistake. After all, she did worse for less just a couple of days ago.

But this time Even is here, and there is no way he's going to let her hurt Isak again, be it in his actions or his words.

So, "Isak," Even stands up from his chair and calls for him. "Please, leave us alone."

"But, sir, I have to-"

"Isak. I asked you to leave. The rest can wait."

Even's voice is firm and imperative; he doesn't remember ever speaking to anyone that way, even less _Isak_ . He hates it and he's already dying to apologize to him, but he also knows it's the only way to protect him from Sonja. He needs to leave the room, _now_.

"Isak. Hurry up, we don't have all day."

Isak looks up at him with a frown, and it's the first time in days that Even can see something other than a dull, lifeless gleam inside his eyes. He almost looks like he's about to protest, not like a robot would, to stick to his programming, but like the Isak he knows, who's stubborn and grumpy and who loves to challenge him. It only lasts for a moment though, and soon Isak is getting up and leaving the kitchen without turning back.

"Well, maybe there is hope for him after all," he hears Sonja mutter as she takes a seat at the kitchen table. Even has to bite his tongue in order to hold back his words. He needs to stay focused.

"So, you called your parents?" Even asks. He can't bring himself to sit next to her so he decides to lean against the counter, leaving enough space between them.

"Oh, yes. I got them on the phone an hour ago and we decided it would be good for me to take a few days off and stay at their place," she explains.

Even is taken aback. Not because the situation doesn't call for some space for the both of them, but because Sonja doesn't get along with her parents and paying them a visit when she has issues in her life is usually the last thing she would ever do. 

The thing is, Sonja didn't become obsessed with her reputation and her illusion of a flawless life out of nowhere. Her parents raised her to be perfect, and so she spent her life trying to please them - usually in vain. For the longest time Even understood why she was acting the way she did and forgave her; he couldn't imagine what it must feel like to never be good enough for your own parents. Without any surprise, they never really liked him, they've always wished for their daughter to find someone more stable (meaning, not mentally ill) and with a better situation (meaning, not an aspiring movie maker). But even when she would work her ass off to make them proud, they've never even bothered to act like they appreciated her.

That's why it was so surprising of her to call them and then to agree on spending time with them. Their relationship turning to shit just a few months before their wedding couldn't be seen by her parents as anything but a failure, and they don't want her to fail. It doesn't matter if they hate Even as much as he hates them; Sonja decided to get involved with him, to get _engaged_ , and so if she doesn't go through with it now, it means she failed somewhere along the way.

"And," she resumes speaking, "I would like it to be an opportunity for us to think about what we really want, about who… who we really want to be." She looks almost vulnerable and Even wonders if maybe she got time to think about what she did to Isak and whether she regrets it now. "We aren't doing well, obviously." Even almost snorts at the words; it's a euphemism. "So while I'm away, maybe we should consider what the best option for us really is. To work on our problems, _really_ work on them, or to…" 

She never finishes her sentence, and for the first time, Even starts to see things a bit more clearly. Months ago, they've both decided to get engaged for the wrong reasons: Even because it was a safe option and he didn't know what he would end up with by making a change; Sonja because it was what was expected of her after they've been together for such a long time and she didn't know how to make a change without making it look like she failed.

So here they are: two people terrified of changes, holding on to one another desperately, even if it means ruining each other.

It can't last much longer. "Okay," Even agrees quietly. "You're right. We need some time apart and we need to use this time to think. Figure out what we really want."

Sonja nods and almost smiles back at him. "Good. Thank you." She looks exhausted, by her sleepless night at work but also by so much more. By them, too. Even understands; he's tired, too. And all of sudden, Even realizes, the tension is gone. For how long? Even wouldn't bet much on the longevity of their truce, but considering how far they've gone, it's a nice break before the next storm.

"When are you leaving?"

Sonja stands up. Even checks the time: he's running late. "Tomorrow," she says. She looks down at the mess of scattered plate pieces and sighs loudly. "Don't forget to tell him to clean up his mess." A nice and short break...

She leaves the room and Even waits for her to shut the bedroom door before getting a broom from the closet and taking care of the so-called mess himself. He can go from being late to being very late, it doesn't matter anymore.

And Isak has been in the middle of their storm for far too long; it needs to stop, too.

***

It's unbearable.

No matter how hard he tries to push Even and his feelings away, they always come back to the surface. He has been too close to just press himself up against Even too many times already. It makes him question why he's trying to hold up this facade in the first place - but that's usually when Sonja sweeps in to remind him of what happened to make him act this way. 

And most of all, he wants to tell Even what happened with Sonja. Why? He doesn't quite know, but he just wants to talk to him about it. To tell him what a horrible person he's going to marry and that he should maybe reconsider - because he deserves better than her.

But, if he's being honest with himself, that isn't really within his rights, is it? He can't just go and tell his owner that his fiancée is a _ruthless bitch_.

In fact, he isn't even allowed to think that about her.

And when Even sent him away so harshly just this morning, Isak has found himself scared that Even actually agrees with her, that he has realized that he has been out of line and that Isak wasn't worth his time. But he had to reconsider when he came back to a smiling Even who had cleared up his mess for him already. Even's feelings for him are still very much the same.

Maybe that's what finally makes him decide that he has had enough of this.

Acting all robot-y doesn't change the fact that he still flinches when Sonja raises her voice and neither the fact that he wants to be close to Even. No matter how hard he tries to bury his feelings deep inside of him, they're still there. They don't magically disappear. There is no way for him to stop feeling and to be a normal robot again.

Even has changed him - permanently. For better and for worse.

It has also been Even who told him that he could be anything. It feels like that day, the last day of filming, was ages ago but Isak can still remember it very vividly. How Even had complimented him over and over again until he was a blushing mess. How he had called Isak beautiful, pretty, cute, and all these things.

And how he then called him perfect and told him he could be anything he wanted to be.

If that was true, then Isak can very well be a robot with feelings. And if it is true and he can be anything he wants to be, then he wants to be with Even.

God, he hopes that it's true.

So, once he is done with his tasks (pretty early because he did everything as quickly as possible to be free to do what he's planned), he walks to Even's office and quietly knocks on the door.

There is no reply but Even appears at the door a minute later, looking at Isak with wide, confused eyes. He has to clear his throat before he can croak out a "yeah? Do you need something, Isak?"

It's almost too much for him - seeing Even already accepting Isak's rediscovered robot-behavior makes Isak want to recoil even more. Although, that would be pretty much counterproductive. Especially since Isak is about to let his guard down again. Has Even given up hope already, has he waited for too long?

Isak doesn't know what to say, so he just stands there in front of Even with his mouth open like an idiot. He hasn't thought about what to say and now, with his fear on top, everything is just too much again.

How dumb was he to think that the robot-facade he has put on would actually spare him from feeling awful when all he has felt since is awful?

By depriving himself of the one good thing in his life, Isak has reached the exact opposite of what he wanted. He didn't want to feel like he has felt after Sonja has hit him - and yet, that's exactly how he has felt for the past few days.

Even's hand on his arm is what snaps Isak out of his miserable thoughts. Isak looks up at him and realizes that there are, once again, tears in his eyes threatening to spill over.

And from the look on his face, Even can see them as well.

"Isak?" He whispers - confused, worried, anxious, and maybe also a little hopeful underneath all of the other feelings. Isak gulps at him and then there is Even's thumb, carefully wiping the tears away from his eyes. "What is…? Why are you crying? I - are you okay, Isak? Are you… _back_?"

More tears are welling up and Isak can't stop them. And neither does Even. Instead, he pulls Isak in, taking him into his arms and pressing him against his body. Isak is now sobbing against Even's shoulder. "Sonja… Sonja hit me," is what he can eventually squeeze out.

Isak can feel Even take a deep breath before he answers: "I know… She told me what happened. Well, her version of what happened. But I couldn't talk to you about it - so, I didn't really know what to do."

"I'm s-sorry about that," Isak snuffles, freeing himself a little from Even's protective hug so that he can look up at him. "I didn't know what to do… I… - do you wanna talk about it?"

"If you mean by that if I wanna hear your side of the story, then yes - definitely, yes. But it's okay if you don't want to talk about it, Isak. You don't have to talk about it. I think I can pretty much guess already that Sonja was completely out of line," Even replies before pressing his lips against Isak's forehead.

With a pang to his non-existent heart, Isak realizes how much of an idiot he has really been in the last couple of days. He could've avoided feeling this awful altogether if only he had opened up to Even instead of closing himself in.

Trying to not feel anything doesn't work - but just being close to Even again, feeling him all around himself, makes Isak almost forget about the bad stuff. Of course, it would probably be different if Sonja were around but still… And also, it would've meant he wouldn't have had to see Even suffer right in front of his eyes. Something Isak definitely doesn't want to see ever again.

"No, I want to…" Isak pulls himself off Even completely and sits down on Even's chair instead, smiling up a little at Even while his fingers move along the armrests. "Do you know this is my favorite place in the whole flat?"

Even looks at him in surprise and shakes his head, a fond smile on his lips. "Well, it is. At least, when you're not home. I can… I feel... - safe here."

"You can come in here whenever you want, I hope you know that," Even replies in a very serious tone, as if to make sure Isak understands the meaning of it. He isn't sure if he actually does but he nods. "Anytime, Isak. So… Sonja, she made you feel… - _unsafe_?"

Isak thinks about the question for a while before he nods slowly. "Yes, that and… scared and I don't know," he mumbles. He lowers his eyes because he can't look at Even while he quickly recaps the events that led to Sonja smacking him. "It… it hurt, you know? I felt physical pain and that shouldn't be possible. But I did feel it and I didn't like it. And then I started crying and I didn't like that either. You weren't there and I didn't know what to do… I never felt anything like that ever before. I was so confused and scared and… all I knew was that I didn't want to feel like that ever again."

What he doesn't say, though, is how Sonja also told him that he is probably defective and that's why he's acting like this, why he's feeling things. Because he's a broken robot, clearly not functioning right because if he were, he wouldn't act like this.

And maybe he should tell Even that. But he can't.

Sonja's words, in a way, hurt him more than her slap. Because they are the fuel to all his fears. Because what if when he says them aloud, Even agrees with them and tells Isak that he needs to be fixed? Or worse - what if he tells him that they have to get rid of him because they have no use for a broken thing?

"Isak? Hey, Isak…" Even is in front of him, squatting down to be level with him. "It's okay, yeah? I'm sorry this happened… I already told Sonja off for it and I will not let this happen again, okay? She won't hit you again, I promise."

Even takes Isak's face into his hands, cradling it, his thumb stroking the cheek Sonja has mistreated. A smile appears on Even's face while his thumb slowly moves lower until it reaches the corner of Isak's mouth, tugging at it a little. "Come on, gimme a smile. I miss your smile, cutie." Isak doesn't want to but he can't do anything against the corner of his mouth quirking up. "There we are. You have no idea how much I missed this. How much I've missed _you_."

"I missed you, too, Even," Isak breathes.

They stay like this for a while, Even crouching in front of Isak with his thumb stroking the corner of Isak's mouth. Until Isak feels obligated to add something. "I'm sorry for hurting you, Even. At least… I think I did?" He questioningly looks at Even but doesn't wait for him to reply to it. He has to get the next words out before they eat him alive. He has to tell Even about his fear, even if it's only indirectly and Even might not understand. "And I'm sorry for causing all these problems between Sonja and you. I never meant for it to happen… but it did. I'm really sorry about all of it, Even."

He stops but when he realizes that Even is about to interrupt him, he quickly continues. "I don't want to… You're about to get married and you don't need that kind of trouble. I can understand that. So, I'm… It's okay if you want to return me or… I don't know… It's probably for the best if you do that. Before Sonja hates you."

Isak doesn't say it, but he thinks it - before she hates Even _too_. Because he knows that she hates him already.

"I don't want that and I don't want to be the reason why you are hurting." Isak bites his lips, considering if he can say what he wants to say. "I think you deserve better than her but… you chose her and… I really don't want to be in your way. So, if you want to get rid of me, I won't be mad or anything. I understand."

***

Even can't believe those words just came out of Isak's mouth. 

First, because he had almost lost all hopes of ever hearing _his_ real Isak talk ever again until the boy showed up at his office's door, unable to pronounce a single word, soon bursting into heartbreaking tears. And then, because there is no way Even would ever willingly send Isak back and the simple evocation of it pains him to the core. How could Isak think, even for a second, that he would do such a thing to him? He isn't responsible for the disaster that is Even's and Sonja's relationship. He isn't getting in the way. 

So far, all Isak has ever done is showing him he's allowed to expect more from life, more from love, more for himself.

_I think you deserve better than her._

It's so tempting to linger on those words forever, to the possible meaning behind them. If Isak thinks Even deserves better than Sonja, then who does he deserve? Who's better than her, if not anyone, in Even's eyes especially, Isak himself?

But it's a thought he probably shouldn't have. It's very likely Isak didn't mean it that way. What is a certainty, though, is that Isak really believes Even would be open to getting rid of him like he would throw away a broken microwave, and that's not acceptable.

"Isak," he says softly, almost with a sigh. But Isak is looking down at his feet and won't meet his eyes. He looks almost ashamed of himself or resigned already, and in both cases, Even can't let him feel like that. "Isak, look at me, please," he asks, brushing his thumbs gently along Isak's cheeks until he slowly raises his head again and meets his gaze. "Isak. There is no way I would ever get rid of you, do you hear me?" 

"But-" Isak whispers. Even doesn't like doing it, but he has to interrupt him right away. There is no "but".

"I promise you," Even resumes speaking, stressing every word for them to sink in properly. "I want you and I need you in my life. What would I even do without you? And I'm not talking about cleaning or stupid groceries shopping; that, don't take it the wrong way but, I can do." Even says it with a teasing grin, and, for the first time in days, he finally gets the shadow of a smile on Isak's lips. Relief washes over him in an instant. He's getting his Isak back. "But not having you with me by my side? Not speaking to you every day, not seeing your smile shining at me, not having you in my arms ever again? I refuse to consider it. It's not happening, not now, and not ever."

Isak lets out a long sigh and closes his eyes, and Even waits in silence, giving him all the time he needs to process his words, to _believe_ in them. 

Eventually, Isak leans against him, so their foreheads are touching and their noses are grazing. It's such a sweet gesture, Even has missed the effortless intimacy they shared. And when Isak opens his eyes again, Even gets lost in the soft green of his irises; he wouldn't mind never seeing anything else again but those lovely eyes, for they seem to be holding all the answers he's been desperately seeking for his whole life. 

"What about Sonja?" Isak points out in a murmur.

 _My sweet Isak_. "I don't care about Sonja. She can leave, I don't care," he replies and feels it deep in his bones that those words are nothing but the truth. He doesn't care anymore, nothing matters but the boy he's holding. "I just want you," he adds, because this is the truth, too, and probably the most important there is.

Isak blushes, a sight Even will never grow tired of. His eyes turn a bit wet again, overwhelmed with emotions, and although it looks like the good kind of emotions, seeing tears in his angel's eyes isn't something he can just ignore and not try to dispel.

"Baby, are you okay?" He asks in a soothing voice. 

He doesn't realize how he's called him until Isak lets out a surprised but appreciative soft noise. Isak's eyelashes are fluttering, his gaze is heavy in feelings and thoughts. Even wishes he could read his mind, more than anything.

"I'm- I'm okay. I'm just… I can't believe a human would say such a thing about me. I'm not... " Isak doesn't finish his sentence but Even hears it loud and clear. _I'm not worth it_.

This time Even loses it. Words aren't enough anymore. And Isak is too kind, too beautiful, too perfect to be left believing he's not everything Even has ever dreamt of.

So Even closes the distance between them and kisses him. 

Right from the first touch, Even goes crazy from it. It sends his body and his mind and his soul into a trance, where everything is _Isak, Isak, Isak_. 

Isak gasps with surprise but doesn't pull back; on the contrary, he seems to melt between his hands, as he's still cupping his face, and against the press of his lips, tender but firm on him. He makes the sweetest sound when Even captures his lower lip, finally having a taste of the Cupid's bow he's been fascinated with since they first met. Again, Isak lets out a broken moan, eyelids fluttering shut, then he opens his mouth slightly, like a delicious invitation for Even to kiss more, to taste more, to have always more of him.

But that's when Even realizes what he's doing and he pulls back abruptly.

"Fuck. Isak," he hears himself say, which means nothing at all and doesn't come close to describe what he's feeling. He doesn't dare look at Isak. He's still kneeling on the ground, a breath away from Isak's face, but his hands are now hanging uselessly along his body and he's staring at nothing, internally freaking out at his action. 

He kissed Isak. He just kissed Isak, which means too many things he can't deal with at the moment. 

He cheated on Sonja. It doesn't matter how terrible and shaky their relationship is, or how his heart has been beating in sync with someone else for a while now, he's still crossed lines he's never crossed before. Sonja asked him to think about what he wanted, what _they_ meant, not to betray her.

And he did it all with Isak, of all people. Isak, who never asked him to kiss him. Isak, who probably didn't know a single thing about what it means and didn't want it in the first place. All the boy has ever asked for was to feel safe, to belong somewhere... Not for Even to invade his personal space and steal something so delicate from him.

Not only did Even betray Sonja, but he has just broken Isak's trust as well.

***

Frozen and with his mouth wide open, Isak sits in Even's chair, unable to move, think, or do anything else. He cannot fathom what just happened. Not because it is complicated or something, but rather because he is too overwhelmed with how it has made him feel to think about it.

His head is spinning, his hands are shaky, every part of him wants to latch on to Even, and he knows for a fact that his legs would give in under him if he tried to stand up now, as they feel like they're made out of jelly and not metal.

Even kissed him. He has kissed Even back.

And it's unlike anything he has ever felt.

It was as if he could feel every sensor in his body tingling with excitement while his CPU went into overdrive.

It's almost too much and at the same time just not enough. Isak wants to feel it again and again and again.

He never wants to stop kissing Even ever again. It's all he wants to do for the rest of his life. And yeah, okay, maybe that's not really possible - but then at least for the rest of the day.

With this thought in mind, he finally opens his eyes again to look at Even. He wants to pull him in for another kiss but stops immediately when he sees the look on Even's face. He looks distraught and confused. He looks as if he made a big mistake…

Almost like he regrets kissing Isak.

What if that's it? What if Even really regrets having kissed him? That would be more than hard... it would break Isak. It would break him even more than Sonja slapping him. He wouldn't survive it - and that may be a ridiculous, human notion but it's how it would feel to him.

And when Even says, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that", Isak is close to losing it all.

But he tries to push his feelings aside for a second - first of all, to check on Even who still looks distressed, and second to check if he actually means it. Because with everything that has happened between them up until now, Isak is pretty sure that he doesn't mean it. He can't mean it. Everything they've done during the past month, every little step they've taken towards each other has led them to this. Isak knows they've both anticipated this - wishing, waiting, hoping for it.

So, no, this can't be true. This can't be what Even actually wants to say. But why has he said it then?

"No," Isak says while he puts his hand underneath Even's chin to lift it until Even is looking at him. "Why do you say that?"

"Because I shouldn't have done this... I didn't even check with you if you're okay with this and if you want that... I don't want to..."

Isak tilts his head to the side and frowns at Even. "You don't want to what?" He asks. "And do you really need to check if I'm okay with this? Isn't it obvious?"

When Even doesn't reply and just keeps looking at him, almost helplessly, Isak tries a different approach. Carefully, he slides down from the chair onto his knees, so that he is level with Even. Then he takes Even's face into his hands, his thumbs on Even's chin and his other fingers spread across his cheek. "You worry too much about stupid things, Even Bech Næsheim," he whispers, his face very close to Even's, he can feel the other's breath tickling over the skin around his mouth.

He definitely has Even's attention now and he's looking at him with wide eyes and a slightly opened mouth. Waiting for Isak to make the next move, to prove him wrong, to show him that he wants to be kissed, to ask for Even to kiss him.

Instead, Isak leans forward and presses his lips against Even's forehead. "Do you really think I don't want to be kissed by you?" He asks before he presses a kiss on his temples. "I don't think you regret it, so that must be it… You think I don't want you to kiss me…" A kiss on the tip of Even's nose. "Why would you think that?" Another kiss on his forehead. "Was I not obvious enough?" A kiss on his left cheek. "Were the movie lines not good enough for you?" And the right cheek. "If that's that then… well… Can you please just kiss me now, Even?" Another kiss, this time to the corner of Even's mouth.

By now, Even is breathing heavily, his mouth hanging open while his eyes are half-closed and his pupils are blown.

He looks… delicious and Isak has to bite his lip to keep in an embarrassing sound.

"Shit, Isak… where did you learn to be so seductive?" Even whispers hoarsely, his lips chasing Isak's mouth.

Isak just smiles, proud and smug, before he pulls Even in to kiss him. It's probably sloppy and very uncoordinated because Isak has never done this before and online research only gets you so far. But, quite frankly, Isak doesn't care at all. He's just happy that his lips are touching Even's again and that this time, hopefully, it won't stop too soon again.

For a moment, Even is too perplexed to kiss back - but when he eventually does, Isak almost loses it.

It just feels too fucking good to be true.

When he feels the tip of Even's tongue poking against his lips, Isak freaks for a second, unprepared. But before Even can get riled up again, he opens up his mouth for Even to seize it and to make it his.

And boy, he does!

Isak is dizzy by the time Even pulls back to suck in a deep breath. They have changed their position, without Isak realizing because he was too distracted by the kiss. Even is sitting back now, his arms embracing Isak's upper body, and Isak is half-sitting on his lap. One of his hands is knotted into Even's short, holding on for dear life.

Once Even looks like he has regained his breath, Isak immediately surges forward again to capture his lips anew.

Even doesn't complain and lets Isak take the initiative this time, letting his tongue roam around in his mouth before he uses his tongue to involve Isak's into a game. It is almost - and the thought makes Isak smile - like they were dancing together.

When they stop kissing after what feels like an hour, Isak doesn't know up from down or what day of the week it is.

He hides his flushed face against Even's chest, inhaling his scent and listening to his agitated heartbeat. It makes Isak smile - because he knows he is the reason for Even being in this state.

"Are you okay?" Even suddenly asks, his hand stroking Isak's hair and then down his back until it comes to rest on the small of his back.

Slowly, Isak tilts his head up to look up at Even who is already looking at him. "I'm more than okay… Just a little uncomfortable. Do you think… Can we go somewhere else and continue this kissing business?"

Even laughs lightly and places a kiss on Isak's nose before he nods. "Sure, let's move to the living room and continue this _kissing business_."

"Are you making fun of me?" Pouting Isak gets up from Even's lap and then helps the other one up as well. As soon as they're both standing again, Isak is already glued to Even's chest again, not willing to put more distance in between them than necessary. "How else should I call it then if kissing business is not to your liking, huh?"

"No, no…" Even smiles, scattering little kisses all over Isak's face and his neck. "You can call it whatever you want, baby."

Again this word - this… pet name.

It does things to Isak. He presses himself against Even even more and lets him feel exactly how much he likes that name. Usually, Isak would overthink this, wonder why a little pet name makes him go crazy like this, why Even would even call him that… but not today. Isak can't think about these things today, he's pretty sure his CPU has reduced its activity to its most basic functions.

So, instead of overthinking, he hears himself moan: "Say it again."

" _Baby_ ," Even breathes back at him, sending chills down Isak's back. Isak can feel his pants getting tighter around his crotch area and he's sure Even can feel it as well. But he isn't embarrassed by it, not anymore. "I have a better idea… let's go to the guest room instead and use the bed instead of the sofa."

Isak just nods and lets Even push him the way he wants to go - because he doesn't care one bit where Even kisses him, as long as he _does_ kiss him.

Eventually, they end up on the unused guest bed, Isak atop of Even, their limbs intertwined in every possible way, hands moving over faces, necks and torsos, lips brushing, tongues dancing, and every now and then there's also teeth nibbling on skin.

"Please, Even…" Isak whimpers after another eternity of kissing. "Don't ever stop kissing me, okay? It's the best thing in the whole world."

Even smiles up at him - and for the first time, Isak notices how his lips look now. They're red and swollen, almost bruised. Quickly, Isak brings two fingers to his own lips to check them but they feel absolutely normal. "Did- Did I do that? Did I hurt you, Even?"

"No, Isak, don't worry…" Even calms him down immediately. "It's normal… It happens when you kiss for too long. Well, to human lips. I guess yours are a little different. Though they feel absolutely perfect, trust me."

Isak blushes but frowns at the same time. "What do you mean - kiss for too long? How can you kiss for too long?"

Even just laughs, making Isak pout again. He sits up on Even's hips and crosses his arms over his chest. "Stop making fun of me!" Even has to bite his lip hard but eventually, he stops laughing and just looks up at Isak with hooded eyes. "Good. Now - what does it mean to kiss for too long? Can I not kiss you anymore now? I don't want to stop, I don't think it has been too long. In fact, I would say there is no 'too long'."

"I mean… we can keep going for a while," Even explains, reaching up with one hand to brush his fingers over Isak's lips. "But eventually, I will have to stop because otherwise, it will just start to hurt. I'm sorry my human body is not to your liking."

"Oh… no, no, it is very much to my liking," Isak hums.

That gets a sound out of Even that Isak hasn't heard before and that he has to reward with yet another kiss. And damned be Even's bruised lips, he'll have to live with it for a while because Isak doesn't think he'll be getting enough of them anytime soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, who was expecting this???  
> How did you all like it? We know you've been waiting for them to kiss for so long and now they did. Extensively so. ;-)  
> Needy!Isak ftw?! <3  
> How will they now spend the time Sonja is away? Do you think Even will make a final decision or is he too distracted by sweet, sweet Isak?


	12. det finnes ingen andre nå enn oss to (no one else exists now but the two of us)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Sonja away, Even and Isak put their free, alone time to good use.  
> Even makes a decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we are back!!! A little late, but hopefully it will be all worth it ;)  
> Thank you so much for reading us and sticking by our side through this wild ride! Since the previous chapter, so two weeks ago, we got so many new readers, it's incredible. And of course it's always such a pleasure to read your thoughts in the comments and to exchange with you. Thanks for everything, really.  
> That being said, we will leave you to discover this monster of a chapter. Don't forget to scream about it - or at us - once it's done, we got a feeling you will need it after this... Haha. Enjoy <3
> 
> (PS: I don't know how useful it is to point it out now but, mind the rating of this fic I guess?)

Isak makes sure that Even is still fast asleep before he quickly sneaks into the kitchen and closes the door behind him. He doesn't want to wake Even yet - because Even deserves to get as much sleep as he can get and also because he wants to surprise Even. And Isak knows that, if he can make it work, Even will love it. He has seen this in a lot of the romantic movies he watched to impress Even.

So, after turning the lights on, Isak gets to work.

He turns on the coffee machine and puts some frozen rolls into the oven to crisp them up while he prepares the rest of the breakfast.

There's a tray in one of the cupboards Isak can use. He lays it on the kitchen counter and once the dishware and cutlery is on the tray, Isak takes a look at the fridge. He takes out milk, cheese, and different kinds of jam, adding them to the tray. He also takes out two eggs, putting them next to the stove, and pours a glass of orange juice.

While Even's scrambled eggs are cooking, Isak cuts some fruits and lets his mind wander back to the last two days.

The last two days that he has mostly spent kissing Even and exploring every last corner of his mouth. Despite his concern for the well-being of his lips, Even hasn't complained once when Isak has initiated yet another kiss. On the contrary, he kissed him right back and sucked Isak's tongue into his mouth, claiming it as his.

Isak could only repeat himself: kissing Even is the best thing in the world.

And as if he wasn't already lucky enough, Sonja left the flat last night to visit her parents for a week.

A whole week.

Sonja being gone for a week makes him especially happy for two reasons: first of all, it means she can't hit him again and second, it also means he can spend as much of his time kissing Even (and doing other things with him, of course) as he wants. There is no one stopping them from kissing in the middle of the hallway or from watching movies all day, cuddled up on the sofa.

It also means that there is no one who could stop him from bringing Even breakfast to bed either.

And that is exactly what he is going to do now.

Isak pours the coffee into the cup, scoops the eggs onto the plate, takes the rolls out of the oven, and puts the fruits into a bowl with some yoghurt and honey.

Once everything is safely arranged on the tray, he lifts it up and carries it over to the bedroom where he puts it down on the nightstand before he sits down on the bed. Even is still sleeping, lying on his stomach with his face hidden away in the pillow. He looks too cute, so Isak just watches him for several seconds, not ready to wake him up yet.

When Even stirs in his sleep, Isak decides it is time.

He leans over Even, carefully caressing his naked shoulder with his hand. "Good morning," he whispers against the shell of his ear before placing a kiss there. "Time for your breakfast,  _ baby _ ."

Isaks has been wanting to try out the pet name ever since Even used it for him the first time and now that he has, he is pretty happy about how it sounds and feels. It feels right, it feels like that is exactly what he should call Even.

"Shit…" Even croaks and turns until he is on his back. He looks up at Isak with sleepy eyes and a smile on his sore lips. "Did you just call me baby?"

Blushing, Isak nods. "Yeah… I'm sorry… I should have asked you, I guess?!"

But Even shakes his head and pulls Isak in quickly. "No, it's fine… more than fine… I was just not expecting this…" They kiss and Isak's insecurity is gone immediately. He moves, without letting go of Even's lips, until he's sitting on Even's lap and can deepen the kiss.

"I made you breakfast," he whispers when they separate again. With a smile he nods to the tray on the nightstand. "I made everything because I didn't know what you'd want…"

"That looks amazing, Isak, thank you so much" Even replies before moving them around until he can comfortably reach for the tray. He pours some milk into his cup before taking a sip and then looks at Isak again. "Do you want anything?"

"No, Even, I'm a robot, I don't eat and drink," Isak replies with a fond eye roll. Of course, Even knows that - but it's still kind of cute of him to ask Isak.

After taking another sip of his coffee, Even picks up the plate with the scrambled eggs, his eyes wandering over the rest of the stuff on the tray. "So… you expect me to eat all of this, do you? Do you want me to get fat?"

"What? No!" Isak gasps in outrage. "I don't want you to get fat… I want you healthy and happy! I just… I wanted to give you all the options to… well, so you can pick what you want right now and... "

"And to be cute," Even chuckles, making Isak blush.

Isak moves from Even's lap to sit next to him - to give him more room for eating and to pout because… Well, he doesn't know exactly why but he still does it anyway. "Well, you can think whatever you want. And if you're unhappy about your breakfast, I can just throw it all away. I don't care… It's your money, not mine. I mean, I put some time and effort into this, but whatever…"

Suddenly, he is interrupted by Even kissing his neck, down to his shoulders. "You're extra cute when you're pouting, did you know?"

"I'm not," Isak replies bashfully; his facade already melting away again, as he exposes more of his skin to Even, hoping the other one will not stop kissing him. And thankfully, Even doesn't stop. Isak closes his eyes, focusing on Even's lips on his shoulder. "You know what… fuck it, I am."

He can feel the laugh vibrating against his skin more than he hears it and it's such a nice feeling that it makes him let out a weird, high-pitched sound.

Even looks up at him, his eyes suddenly darker than before. Isak has to gulp and he knows he's blushing again, as well. "God, Isak," Even whispers in a deep voice. "You really have no idea about the things you do to me… you have to stop, okay, baby?"

"How can I stop with something when I don't even know what it is that I'm doing?" Isak frowns down at him. Even definitely looks riled up and Isak isn't sure if he should be worried or not.

But before he can think about it any further, Even scoots up and captures his lips, engaging him in yet another kiss. And if there is anything at all that can distract Isak, it's definitely kissing Even. By now, Isak is very sure that it's kissing  _ Even _ and not just kissing. He doesn't think kissing anyone else would have this effect on him.

In fact, he doesn't want to kiss anyone else.

Never.

"Your breakfast…" He mumbles half-heartedly against Even's lip, once the kiss has slowed down again and they're basically just breathing each other's air. "The eggs and the coffee are probably cold by now."

Even sighs, his tongue caressing Isak's Cupid's bow. "Who cares about that?"

"Fine. I'll never bring you breakfast to bed ever again."

"Not what I meant," Even protests and lets go of Isak's lips to sit up again. He picks up the plate and the fork and eats the eggs, quickly. "There… very tasty, thank you. Now, the rest can't get cold… So, can we go back to kissing and cuddling already?"

Isak tilts his head and narrows his eyes a little. "This doesn't look like you appreciate my breakfast." He leans over Even to grab the bowl with fruits and yoghurt and the spoon. "I cut all these fruits for you… So, open up!"

"What the hell…? I'm not a b-"

Before Even can finish his sentence, Isak uses the opportunity and slides a spoon full of yoghurt and fruit into Even's mouth. For a second, Even looks scandalized but then he just munches down the food and opens his mouth to get more.

Happily, Isak feeds him more and more until the bowl is empty and he can put it away on the tray. "See… That's more like it," he grins smugly and crawls onto Even's lap again. "Now we can talk about this kissing business again if you're still up for it."

"I'm always up for this," Even mumbles, already half-attached to Isak's lips. "Especially, if you call it kissing business. It sounds like you're very serious about it, baby."

"I'm never joking about kissing!"

***

Objectively, Even has been living with Isak for months. But living with him now, knowing that Sonja won't be back today, tomorrow or even the day after, changes everything for him. Of course, he omits reality and ignores his latent guilt, but by doing so, he gets a glimpse of what it would be like to live with Isak, just him and Isak. Not as owner and robot, but as partners, as equals, and he loves what he's seeing. 

It feels right.

Only, what they've been doing together so far, they've done it in the safety of their apartment, which is fine because the bubble they are used to has protected them many times, but Even knows it's not all there is, and Isak shouldn't feel like they are only a possibility when hidden inside. Sure, Even has taken him to his workplace more times than Sonja has ever been, but that's not what Even has in mind. He could bring any friend on set if he wanted to. 

Isak is more, and he deserves more, something like- dates. 

The idea lingers in Even's mind for a couple of days until one night, he looks at the dark sky cleared of all clouds and he makes a decision. He knows it's something Isak will love.

"I'm taking you somewhere," he tells Isak, after getting everything ready, while Isak has been staring at him in confusion the whole time. He looks adorable, all wrapped up in Even's sweatshirt - a new habit of his, he seems to love stealing and wearing Even's clothes - with a slight frown on his face.

"Now?"

"Yes. Now," Even smiles at him. He's already grabbing his car key.

"Are we going dancing again?" Isak asks, not letting it go until he gets a proper answer.

Even pauses. What he has in mind is miles away from meddling into a sweaty crowd of strangers. "No, why? Do you want to?"

Isak shrugs. Good. He doesn't look half as excited as the first time they've talked about it. "I don't know, but last time we went out that late it was to go dancing so…"

And right here, this is what comforts Even into his idea. Isak is too unused to going out at any time, for reasons that don't involve groceries shopping. But Even is determined to show him there is more to see and do in this world, and that he's allowed to want it. To take it.

"No, it's something new. But trust me, you're going to like it," Even explains, and it finally earns him a smile from Isak. 

"I trust you," he nods, and then walks to him. He puts a careful hand on Even's chest for stability before leaning on him to press a kiss on his lips. Immediately, Even's mind turns blank except for Isak and his irresistible desire to prolong this kiss, to deepen it. 

But Isak pulls back, which hasn't happened very often in the last few days, to say the least. "Alright. Let's go, I'm curious," Isak says, smirks at him, knowing full well what he's doing to Even, and walks to the front door.

Even has to bite back a groan.  _ This boy _ .

*

The car ride was relatively short, and Even almost wished it would've lasted longer, just to be able to enjoy the moment with Isak for a few more minutes.

As soon as they left the traffic, albeit minimal, from Oslo, Even took Isak's hand in his and kept it all the way, resting safely on his thigh. It seemed to him that Isak did not once set his eyes on the road, his gaze glued on Even instead. Even's assumption was proven to be true when lsak leaned against him, sneaking his face up to his ear, where, as he let his lips slide against the shell of his ear, he whispered, "I've never told you before but I love watching you drive. You look hot."

Even almost stopped the car in the middle of the road. Isak was becoming way too good at flirting and seducing him. He was dangerous.

Thankfully, they arrived at the deserted, secluded meadow Even had planned to take Isak to. There, they walk for a bit, moving away from the road, until it's only the two of them in the middle of nature and a sky full of shining stars above them. Even opens his backpack to pull a blanket out of it and then proceeds to lay it on the grass. 

"Perfect," he says and invites Isak to sit down. 

"Okay," Isak settles down, but he still looks very much sceptical. "What's coming next?"

Even smiles at him as he lies down on the blanket and then waves at him to join him. Isak doesn't make him ask twice, he hastens to snuggle at his side, his head pillowed on his shoulder, a hand curled up and holding on to his jacket.

Then he sees it.

"Wow. Even, it's-"

"Beautiful?" Even offers when Isak doesn't seem to find the right words. 

"The stars are shining so much here. Away from the city's lights," Isak comments, to himself more than to Even. He looks mesmerized. "I knew it, in theory but… I've never seen it."

Even's heart feels full at the sight, not of the stars, but of Isak discovering for the first time what a clear, starry night sky looks like. He knew Isak would like it, but he had no idea  _ how much _ he would. It never occurred to him that not only Isak never had the opportunity to lie down and stargaze, but he's never actually seen such a magnificent sky with his two eyes. He has only ever seen digital images of it. Not the reality of it.

"Thank you," Isak whispers. "You were right. I love it."

_ You deserve to see all the beauties of this world. You deserve to only see beauty _ , Even thinks but doesn't dare to say out loud. Instead he simply says, "we can come back anytime you want," and judging by Isak's wide smile, this is enough to make him happy.

Even cuddles him closer, as they gaze at the stars above them in silence. Soon, Isak starts pointing at the constellations and naming them, sometimes retelling full myths and stories about them. Even has always loved Greek mythology the most, for it usually was very tragic, and tragic love stories were what has always inspired him when he was younger. Tonight, though, the story speaking to him the most has a happy ending. Maybe because, while holding Isak in his arms, it's the only kind of ending that made sense to him from now on.

"See over there?" Isak says, pointing at a direction in the sky, then drawing the shape of the constellation with the tip of his finger, until Even spots it. "Those two constellations are called Andromeda and Perseus." Slowly, Isak shows them to him one after the other, making sure Even is following. 

"What about them?" Even asks, knowing full well how it will bring another story. He loves listening to Isak, even more since he has stopped talking like he was reading a Wikipedia page out loud. Now, he sounds like himself, like every story means something to him. Like he understands and feels them deep to the core. 

And this one in particular.

"In Greek mythology, Andromeda is the daughter of the king of Aethiopia, Cepheus, and his wife Cassiopeia," Isak starts telling the story. And Even, he can't help it, he has to avert his eyes from the sky and focus on the boy lying against him, the boy with the shining stars in his eyes who look more beautiful than any existing constellation. "When Cassiopeia boasts that she is more beautiful than the Nereids, Poseidon sends the sea monster Cetus to ravage the coast of Aethiopia as divine punishment." 

"Classic Greek tantrum," Even comments. Isak snorts but presses a finger on Even's lips to keep him quiet. Even suspects him of only doing it for the sake of touching said lips.

"Anyway," Isak mumbles, slowly pulling his finger away. "Andromeda is chained to a rock as a sacrifice to sate the monster."

"Oh no."

"But Perseus, who's flying near the coast of Ethiopia on his winged sandals, having slain the Gorgon Medusa, sees her and falls in love with her." 

"Love at first sight? That's epic love, keep going."

"Well, I'm trying," Isak rolls his eyes at him. Even kisses his forehead as an apology, but grins the whole time. "Perseus decides to kill the monster and so Andromeda is saved from death. They get married and Perseus takes Andromeda to Greece to reign as his queen."

"He took her away from the monster, and they lived happily ever after," Even whispers, mostly to himself.

Isak doesn't get it though, and scoffs at him. "That's basically what I said."

Even looks at him first, and then at the stars, lost in thought.

"After Andromeda's death," Isak starts speaking again. "The goddess Athena placed her in the northern sky as the constellation Andromeda, which also contains the Andromeda Galaxy, along with Perseus, in commemoration of Perseus' bravery in fighting the sea monster Cetus."

"So they would be together forever?"

"Yes."

"And she had a whole galaxy inside her?"

"Not Andromeda per se," Isak huffs. "The constellation."

Even nods. "I can see it," he says, but he's not looking at the sky anymore, he only has eyes for Isak, who deserves a place in the northern sky more than anyone else.

And who deserves to be saved from his monster, too. If only Even was brave enough.

***

Isak is lying in bed, next to Even, and they don't even talk or do anything, they're just lying next to each other, their bodies turned towards each other and their eyes locked. He can see that Even is tired, he's yawning every now and then, too. And Isak himself has to go plug in soon because there's already a warning blinking in the corner of his eyes.

But he just doesn't want this moment to end.

It's ridiculous, considering that they're doing nothing, yet it still feels like everything. It feels like one of the most precious moments they have had so far.

Though nothing will top the time when Even took him out to gaze at the stars.

Isak has never seen anything like the night sky full of stars. Not in real life, only as an image he has found online. It has been amazing to just look at it and when he looked up all the astronomy behind it, he was even more fascinated. Especially by the one story he told to Even. Isak isn't quite sure why it had stuck out to him so much - but, from now on, he will love the Andromeda and Perseus constellations the most.

With a sudden "What are you thinking about?" Even pulls him out of his head immediately and he blushes a little before he scoots closer to Even who is opening his arms for him to cuddle into.

"Just about the night we went stargazing," Isak whispers back before pressing a quick kiss to Even's lips. "I think it's my new favorite memory."

Even is practically melting in front of his eyes and Isak has no idea why - but he rejoices in the knowledge that he is the one making Even like this. It's exhilarating and he just loves the sight of Even like this: glassy eyes, pupils blown, slightly flushed cheeks, and a fond little smile playing around his lips.

Isak really can't do anything but steal another kiss from those lips.

The kiss is received with a happy sigh and Even pulls Isak in even closer. It feels like he never wants to let him go again and the thought makes him almost giggle into the kiss out of… happiness?

Is this what he is now? Happy - happy like a human?

Slowly, Isak pulls away from the kiss to look at Even in wonder. "I think…" He starts in a low mumble. "I think that I am…  _ happy _ ."

Even gasps and then smiles so hard that Isak thinks he might rupture some of the muscles of his face. "That's amazing, Isak. I'm happy, too. Happier than I've been in a while. You make me really happy."

Again, Isak revels in the fact that he is the one making Even feel like this.

They kiss again and again, until Even's tiredness takes over and the kisses get lazier and eventually, they stop altogether and Isak just keeps looking at Even while he slowly falls asleep next to him. And even then, he can't stop looking at the male human.

He watches Even sleep, brushes some blond strands out of his face every now and then, and just marvels at his beauty.

When the warning about his batteries gets too annoying, he finally decides that it's time to plug himself in. But instead of going to the guest room like he's used to, he just uses the socket next to the bedside table. He doesn't want to leave, he wants to stay here with him, even if he will be unaware of it since he shuts down during the charging process as it takes a lot less time this way.

However, right now, he is not ready to shut down just yet.

Instead, he cuddles up closer to Even who moves a little in his sleep to adjust to Isak, wrapping an arm around him.

Isak melts into Even's side and lets his eyes wander over the human's body. From the tip of his nose over his full lips down to his Adam's apple. He lingers there for a second before he wanders further down Even's neck, over his shoulders and his torso. While he's looking at Even's torso, he has to stop over and over again, marveling at different parts, such as Even's nipples or his belly button. 

Suddenly, he realizes how much he wants to touch all of these parts, how he would like to run down his hand from Even's neck to his belly button - and maybe even further down. The hairline that leads downwards from there until it disappears underneath Even's shorts looks very inviting.

But that's not something he can do, right?

Of course, especially not now that Even is asleep and can't agree or disagree… but also, what about when he is awake? Is it something that Isak could do then?

Is it normal that he wants to touch Even everywhere?

To be honest, probably none of the things Isak wants or thinks or feels are normal for a robot anymore. But - are they for humans?

Do humans want to touch their…  _ partner _ everywhere?

Isak feels like some cables are burning hot with excitement and happiness when he thinks of the word in connection with Even. Is that what Even is to him now? Of course, it is more complicated than that, with him being Isak's owner and with Sonja somewhat still in the picture (and he will have to ask Even about her eventually, he knows, but he doesn't want to ruin what is happening between them right now) - but… basically? Is Even his partner, his boyfriend? Are they a couple?

Before he can stop it, Isak starts to get all giddy again and he has to press a hand on his mouth before he wakes Even up with his happy laughter.

Fuck.

He's being ridiculous and getting ahead of himself.

Probably he has to ask Even about all of these things eventually before he can get all excited about this. It's not okay to just assume these things… they will have to talk first. And Isak is very, very scared of that talk, so he really doesn't want to speak with Even about this stuff anytime soon, even if he knows that he should.

After taking another glance at Even, Isak turns off the lights in the room. He lies back down and cuddles up to Even again, happily smiling to himself.

He can't wait to wake up next to Even like this.

*

Waking up next to Even is the best thing; it's exactly how Isak has imagined it to be - and, bonus points, he thinks Even loves it just as much.

But after two days and nights spent like this, Isak feels like it isn't enough anymore.

The desire to touch every part of Even's body is growing bigger and bigger inside of him and he sometimes pops a boner (he has read that term up on the internet) out of nowhere, just thinking about Even's body.

Isak has done a lot of online research about this and it has made him even more curious but anxious at the same time. What if it's something that Even doesn't want?

He isn't even quite sure if the things he reads are things he wants to do. It is all very confusing to him and he doesn't even know if any of that applies to him. He is still a robot and yeah, it seems like he has a working dick but that doesn't mean everything will work just as it does with humans.

But there's really no one he can talk to this about, is there?

The only person he could talk to is Even - but he is so insecure about whether or not Even even cares about this stuff, if he wants to do more with Isak than just kissing, that he can't bring himself to bring up the topic.

It seems like it would end in embarrassment for both of them.

And that is how he, once again, ends up in Even's office with the phone in his hands while the human is out to buy some groceries. He dials Eskild's number and it doesn't take long for the man to pick up his phone.

"Hello, my little baby robot," Eskild greets. "How can I help you today?"

Isak can't help but blush a little immediately. He's being ridiculous and he knows it. Eskild can't even see him and he doesn't know what Isak wants to talk about yet, so there is absolutely no reason to blush. But apparently, for some weird reason, blushing has become part of his personality by now.

While thinking about how to start, Isak's fingers play with different pens and other stationery from Even's desk. Maybe it would be easiest to just blurt things out? It might be awkward for a second but at least then it would be out of the way… "I need your help with… There's something I want to… do. With Even. Or at least I think I do? And I'm not sure about it… and also of how it works. Or if Even would even want that."

That wasn't quite as much to the point as he has planned it to be. But it's something and maybe Eskild can piece it together without further information. Isak has a feeling that it's something the human is good at.

"Okay, okay… slow down there, little one." Eskild sounds more amused than actually confused and Isak thinks that he might be making fun of him. So, he pouts but waits for Eskild to continue. "So you want to have sex with Even, yeah?"

The blush on his face quickly deepens but he nods. It takes him almost fifteen seconds to realize that Eskild can't see him. "Uhm… uh, yeah… Or well, I think I do? But like I said I don't know if it's even possible or…"

"Yeah, yeah, I've heard that," Eskild interrupts him. "Well, I'm not an expert on robot technology, so I actually have no idea about that. But I'd assume if your dick works, it should be no problem? And I do remember you being hard at the nightclub, so… no problem there, huh, sweetie?! You know that there are robots specifically made to pleasure humans, right? To me that sounds like it's generally possible… so, why not for you?"

To be quite honest, Isak is overwhelmed with the information itself and, maybe even more so, with Eskild's openness. Though he should've probably expected the latter.

"O-okay… cool."

There's a sigh on the other end of the line. "Baby robot, listen, if you're not capable of talking about this like an adult, you're probably not ready for it."

And okay… yeah, Isak hasn't thought about it like that before. But maybe Eskild is right and he either needs to get a grip on himself or he is maybe really not ready. Wanting something and being ready for it are, after all, two very different things.

"You're right," Isak mumbles. Then he takes a long breath and squeezes Even's favorite pen in his hand. "I want to have sex with Even… but I have no clue about sex and all the things I read online were confusing and only about humans. I'm not sure if sex is different for robots at all - like, for example, do we need lube, too? And how do I even know if Even wants it?"

"Oh, love, trust me… Even definitely wants to fuck you senseless. I have zero doubt about that and neither should you," Eskild replies.

Isak blushes again and this time, it is definitely not his fault.

Fucking him senseless…

Jeez, Eskild is possibly the only person who talks like that in an actual conversation on the phone. Right?

Or maybe… Isak imagines Even saying these words, whispering them into his ear in his deep voice and…  _ okay _ . A hot shiver runs down his back and his dick is definitely stirring in his pants with interest at the thought.

Shit…

"Isak?"

He blushes heavily again and focuses all his senses on the pen in his hand. "Uh… yeah, sorry, I just… I tried to think about what makes you so sure about that… But okay, let's say you're right… Then… Should I just ask him if we can do it or how does it work?"

"I mean… you can do that," Eskild replies before taking a minute to think. "Yeah… maybe, actually, it isn't such a bad idea. You know, normally, I would advise you to just try and seduce him… But I think for you two and your situation… talking about everything first is probably a good idea. Maybe, you can ease into it a little… telling him that you'd like to do more than kissing and ask him what he thinks…"

Isak nods along to Eskild's words. They make sense to him and he can actually imagine himself telling Even that. "Okay, yeah… I think that I can do that. And how… how will I know if he likes… what I'm doing when we're doing it?"

"Oh, baby robot, you will know. Trust me, you will."

What kind of an answer is that?

But Isak takes it as it is and hopes that Eskild is right and he will know. Because he wants Even to like it. More than liking it, actually.

They're about to hang up but then Eskild has another thing to add: "And please, sweetie, make sure you'll like it, too, okay? It's not all about pleasing Even, you know? It's for both of you and you have to be okay with everything you do. I know Even, he won't do anything that you don't like… but you'll have to tell him if you don't like stuff because otherwise he won't know that you don't. Okay?"

"Okay…" Isak replies, almost confused. He doesn't know why Eskild is so insistent about it but whatever.

"Promise me, baby robot," Eskild insists further. "It can be hard… So, I need you to promise me that you will. Even if you don't understand right now."

"Fine… okay. I promise, alright?"

***

Isak is quiet when Even comes back from his shopping trip, and doesn't even protest when Even cooks himself a quick dinner - he hasn't been hungry lately, or not for food, considering his mouth has been very busy with a different kind of activity. Even isn't too alarmed though, for Isak still leans against him when their bodies are close, still gets on his tiptoes to steal a kiss. He just seems… distracted.

Ultimately, everything makes sense once it's time to go to bed. 

Even comes back from the bathroom and finds Isak already in bed, except he's sitting cross-legged and his face is far too serious for someone who is getting ready to cuddle before turning off for the night. When he looks up and meets Even's eyes, he blushes and can't maintain eye contact for very long. 

"Is something wrong?" Even asks, sitting in front of Isak and reaching out to brush a curl out of Isak's forehead. 

"N-No. It's… I have something to ask you," Isak stutters awkwardly before closing the distance between them. The kiss turns deep and dirty from the start, and Even would never dare to complain, but it still is an unusual thing coming from Isak. He likes the intensity of their making out session to be crescendo. 

Isak gets a hand on his thigh, then slides it dangerously close to Even's crotch and that's when he decides, against all common sense and his thrilled body reacting to the touch at a fast rate, to interrupt their kiss. "Hm, Isak? You wanted to ask me something?"

Isak huffs, as if Even is the one being difficult and cryptic. "Yes. So. I talked to Eskild about something."

"Oh, so it should be interesting."

"What?" Isak frowns.

"Everytime you call Eskild you come back with a new, very interesting idea, that's all," Even clarifies with a smile, hoping to ease the slight tension between them. And it's also very much true. Isak's conversations with Eskild, as much as they used to piss Even off, have always meant good things for them so far.

"Interesting," Isak repeats slowly. And then, "is… Is having sex with me… would it be an interesting idea to you?"

Even chokes on his own spit, completely taken aback, his smug smile gone. Did Isak really just mention them having sex or is it another one of his inappropriate daydreams?!

" _ What? _ "

"Sex, Even. With me."

Even decides to skip the part where he points out how it's the weirdest and most unexpected question Isak has ever asked him, and he has asked  _ a lot  _ over the months. For now he can pretend this is a normal introduction to the thing, which… why not. Even isn't about to get picky.

"Hm, where is it coming from? Is it, like, something you've been seriously thinking about or are you just repeating something Eskild said to you?"

"Of course not," Isak rolls his eyes. "I'm serious. I read stuff." Of course. It wouldn't be Isak if it didn't come with long, complex hours of online research.

"I'm not… It's not something you ask because you read about it, or because you think it's something you have to do. It's not like that," Even tries to explain as carefully as possible. He doesn't want to hurt Isak's feelings or that the boy gets the wrong impression - that Even isn't into the idea, because there is no way he wouldn't be. But they've never talked about it. To be honest, Even had never thought the offer was on the table at all until Isak asked about it. It's not exactly something he has let himself hope for, no matter what he knows about other humans using robots for their own… sexual needs and fantasies. Because it's not like that between Isak and him. It's everything but  _ that _ . But if it's something Isak has been thinking about, has been  _ wanting _ , then, it changes everything.

Because when has Even ever denied Isak anything?

"I know", Isak retorts, looking a bit frustrated. "Even, I'm not a fragile little thing and I'm not naive. I'm just lacking… experience. It's different."

"Okay," Even nods right away. "Sorry, I wasn't implying you don't know what you want or- I just need to know that you want it. You. Not… It can't be about me, okay?"

"Well, it's a little bit about you, too."

Even smiles, but still marks his words. "I don't want you to do it for me, because you think I need or want it."

"You don't want it?" Isak asks, his confidence faltering slightly.

"No! I mean, I do want it! I'm into whatever you're into. But it's also okay if it's something we can't have, or you don't want." In all honesty, it would be torture for Even, but he knows in his heart that it's something he can live with, as long as he still has Isak by his side. After all, he fell in love with the boy weeks, maybe months, before he had even brushed his skin.

"I want to," Isak states without a trace of hesitation. Then he takes Even's hands into his and their eyes meet. "I just need you to guide me. I don't know... I don't know how to do it, I guess? Just in theory. I don't know what sex looks like or feels like or- anything?"

"What do you mean, you haven't watched every possible porn video online?" Even teases him, grinning as he watches Isak frown like he's seriously considering it. And maybe he does. It definitely seems to take Isak far too long to realize he's joking. "Isak, I'm kidding. Please, don't do that. It's not a good idea."

"Why?"

And that's a way too complicated and long conversation they are definitely not having right now. "Just... Let's talk about porn later, alright?"

"Fine," Isak shrugs petulantly. Even has to hold back a laugh. This is so typical of him. "So… What do I do?" He asks, a spark of nervosity suddenly dancing in his eyes as he gazes at his surroundings, as if he's looking for a clue of what his next move should be.

Even wants to ask again if he's sure, to remind him they don't have to do anything - ever - but deep down he also knows Isak well enough for all of it to be wasted words on him. Once Isak gets an idea, it's impossible to change his mind. 

And Isak is right: he's not fragile, he's not naive either. He must trust Isak to know best what he wants, to not doubt him as if he's incapable of figuring out his own feelings and needs.

Isak knows best. Always has.

So, "lay down," Even instructs him softly, and he watches Isak move, settling on his back, looking at Even with curious, eager green eyes. "Can I take off your shirt?" Isak nods, and so, very slowly, Even grabs the base of his shirt and pulls it off, revealing a pale, silky stomach. Isak raises his arms to get rid of the unwanted garment and soon he's lying in nothing but his dark underwear, looking absolutely gorgeous, a halo of golden curls framing his head resting on the pillow, flushed cheeks and parted lips; the most beautiful sight Even has ever set his eyes upon. "Okay?" Even asks, bringing his hand above the smooth expense of Isak's belly, not touching just yet, but dying to.

"Yes," Isak breathes out, heavy look and bitten lips. He's perfect.

Without taking his eyes off him, Even slides his fingers on Isak's stomach, around the illusion of a belly button, along his happy trail, stopping on the edge of the last piece of clothing covering Isak's body.

"Can I, too?" 

Isak's hands move then, gripping at Even's shirt and pulling at it. "You, too," he requests. He sounds breathless already, but the fire in his eyes makes it clear he's nowhere near satisfied. 

So, Even gets rid of his clothes, too, under Isak's careful, fascinated gaze. He doesn't look embarrassed nor intimidated, although he's discovering Even's body - someone's body, really - for the very first time. But feeling scared or self-conscious about someone else's nakedness is probably not something Isak would feel. Or more like, not something he cares enough to feel. He can be insecure about a lot of things, mostly what Even may or may not think about him, but being worried about Even himself, his flesh and bones, his brain and soul, what makes him who he is? It doesn't seem to be something Isak does very often. 

It lights something inside Even, the thought of how unashamed and unapologetic Isak is around him when it comes to being with him, to being close to him - kissing him, touching him, or even doing... this. 

Quickly, Even puts his hands back on Isak, on his hips, playing with the elastic of Isak's underwear. It's a needy sound coming from Isak that finally urges him to remove the boxers and to throw them somewhere in the bedroom.

It's just the two of them, now, in their purest shape.

"You're beautiful," Even leans over the boy and whispers into his ear, dragging his bottom lip along the shell of his ear.

"No," Isak says, fingers grasping the hair at Even’s nape. Even doesn't even remember at which point Isak's hand left the mattress and got on him. He must have blacked out a little in the whole process. "You are," he rectifies, and before Even can protest, Isak is kissing him hungrily, with teeth and tongue and desperation. Their lips move in sync, never completely parting, as their hands start to wander all over each other's body. 

It's maddening, it's addictive, and Even gets lost in the sea of sensations, time and space turning into frivolities. Or that is, until Isak's hand travels south and finds his dick, giving it an unexpected stroke. 

"Fuck, Isak," Even hears himself gasp into the crook of Isak's neck. Of course, just when he thought Isak couldn't surprise him anymore, he finds a new way to catch him off-guard. 

Isak only stops once to ask him to spit into his hand, which is a surprising turn on on its own, before rushing back to touching him. A clever thumb runs over his tip and Even almost loses it right then and there. Between Isak's hands, he's fifteen all over again.

And, "am I doing it right?" Isak has the nerves to ask, although he sounds genuine enough for it to be a honest, not-teasing question.

It takes Even way too long to find his words, distracted every two seconds by the perfect pace Isak has found for him. 

"Couldn't be more right. I would die."

"You're so dramatic," Isak snorts, like Even is being ridiculous - which he isn't, alright. He's just very horny.

"I will show you dramatic," Even huffs, clenching his teeth as he slides away from Isak's heavenly foreplay, but then finds solace in another just as exciting activity - he goes down, down, until he can put his mouth on Isak and give him a hard suck.

The sound coming out of Isak is enough to comfort Even into his new plans. No matter the technicalities behind it, robot or not, it seems to be as pleasurable as it would be to him, and Isak turning into a moaning mess is pretty much all he cares about.

It's been, so to speak, an eternity since the last time Even has done it on anyone, it could as well be in another lifetime, but Isak doesn't seem to complain, judging by the way he can't stop moving around, forcing Even to hold him down on the mattress, which only makes Isak moan louder. A hand finds its way to Even's head and Isak's fingers slowly tangle into the mess of sweaty hair, pulling at it gently from time to time, sending Even into a frenzy. He gets more comfortable, digs his fingers into Isak's thighs as he takes him deeper, Isak's voice echoing against the walls of the room - his new favorite soundtrack.

This is obscene. It's a dream come true.

After a last flick of his tongue along Isak's shaft and a quick kiss on the tip, Even gives Isak (and himself, to be honest) a break. Which doesn't mean he can't find other ways to drive Isak mad.

"This," Even whispers softly against Isak's hipbone. "This is it", he adds, then sucks a bruise into the thin skin, marveling at how, although it doesn't leave a trace behind like it would on human flesh, it still makes Isak shake.

"What?" The boy gulps, looking down at him. 

"This is what sex looks like and feels like. There are no rules, it's whatever you want it to be," he explains, pulling back just enough to meet Isak's eyes properly. 

"It's not... It's not what I read."

Even sighs. Of course Isak would say something like that. "Well, whoever wrote it was wrong."

"Oh, really?" Isak says, sounding like he's doubting him.

"You don't trust me?"

"Of course, I do!" Isak objects, offended. He makes grabby hands at Even and pulls him closer to him, until they are kissing all over again, tongues hugging and exploring each other's mouth as if for the very first time. "I do," he promises against his lips.

"Good. Then believe me, this is all part of sex, alright?"

"Alright," he nods, and he does look like he means it. 

They kiss again, slow and languid, because right now it feels like they have all the time in the world. Isak is looking divine, lying spread out on the white sheets, messy curls, heated cheekbones and hooded eyelids, all for Even to look, touch, feel. 

They slow down. Isak smirks as he says, "then show me more," sending shivers down Even's spine. 

Soon he can feel Isak's hand sliding on his back, making a pause when he reaches his ass, before finding a new, unexplored path between his cheeks.

"You're insatiable," he mumbles in the corner of Isak's lips, breath itching at the feel of Isak's finger grazing where it's never been before.

Isak's delighted laugh sparkles into the bedroom. "Only you can stop me."

But the whole night, Even doesn't stop him once. Why would he?

***

He is in heaven.

Of course, there is no such thing as heaven but when humans talk about this fantasyland where everything is great and perfect and everything feels right - this is what Isak thinks they must mean. Because Isak has never felt better than this and he isn't sure if he ever will again either.

Yeah, okay, he is a bit sticky and sweaty and would be out of breath if that were something he could be, but… it's still perfect.

Or maybe all of that makes it even more perfect - who knows.

After everything he has read about sex, he hasn't exptected it to be like this at all. He has read that it is usually pleasurable and satisfying and all that. And yes, it has been that for him, too - but those are not the words he would use to describe it.

The words that are coming to his mind are more like… life-changing, amazing, perfect, incredible,  _ wow _ . And, what sticks out the most to him, is that he now feels like he knows Even. Really knows him, everything about him, all there is to know about him and that he knows him better than anyone else ever will. Which is stupid, considering that Even has had sex with Sonja and probably also other people. But still…

Isak turns onto his side and slides closer to Even who is lying on his back and seems to be deep in thought.

And that's probably not good… is it?

"Hi, are you…" Isak starts insecurely and stops again. He doesn't even know what he wants to ask Even. Even turns his head and looks at him with his eyes glazed over. It sends a hot shiver down Isak's spine. "Did you… enjoy it?"

"Did I  _ enjoy  _ it?" Even repeats, almost mockingly. "Are you fucking kidding me, Isak? This, this right here, was the best sex I have ever had in my life. And I swear I'm not exaggerating, okay, baby?"

Isak smiles a little, content smile while he nods. "Okay."

He cuddles close to Even who wraps an arm around his shoulder to pull him further in. "And how about you? Was it like you thought it would be?"

"No…" Isak grins. "Not at all. It was so much more. It was everything."

Even places a kiss on his temple and they stay like this for a while, just reveling in each other's presence. Isak knows that they will have to shower eventually, especially because he can feel Even's body fluids drying on his skin, but he just doesn't want to leave his arms nor this bed nor this glorious moment.

Eventually, his thoughts drift astray and he can't do anything about it. Suddenly, there is Sonja in his head, screaming at him for doing this with her fiancé and being so unashamed about it, too. They have done it in their bed after all, using their lube and condoms.

Shit, she's going to be furious, she will kill Even (figuratively, of course - Isak hopes!) and she will return him to the store.

"Baby, are you okay? What's going on?"

Isak snaps out of his thoughts and moves away from Even, so that he can look at him. Even looks worried and Isak thinks it's probably because his own sorrow can be seen all over his face.

It looks like he has no choice. He finally has to ask Even the thing he has been avoiding to talk about for days now. But there is no other solution… He has to know. Sonja will be back the day after tomorrow. Their happy little bubble will burst and if Even is not willing to do anything about it, they'll never be able to go back to this space they've created for themselves. It will be over forever.

"What about Sonja?" Isak thus whispers. "She'll be back soon… and I don't know how you think this is going to… What are you going to do? Will you tell her about us or… or do you expect us to go back to how it was before until she leaves again?"

Isak is almost talking himself into a short circuit, he knows it. He is so scared about Sonja's return and what it will mean for him that he can barely function anymore.

"Baby, hey…" Even is suddenly right in front of his face, his thumb brushing over Isak's cheek gingerly. "Calm down, baby… Please. You don't have to worry about Sonja, okay?"

"It's not easy for me to not worry about her, Even," Isak replies sternly. "She'll be back and she is still your financé and she already hates me. You don't know what she might do when she finds out what we did while she was gone…"

Even stops him with a quick peck on his lips. "Yeah, I know, baby… Trust me, if anyone knows what she's capable of, it's me. But I'm telling you you don't have to worry about her for a reason."

"And what's that?"

"I'm going to break up with Sonja when she comes back, Isak," Even says. "I should've done it ages ago but I was too scared. But there are no excuses anymore. When she comes back, I will break up with her, okay? I wanna be with you, Isak."

And Isak wants to fucking burst with happiness.


	13. det finnes ingenting formildende her (there is nothing soothing here)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even talks to Sonja and they break up. Sonja has a couple of things to say to Even. Isak ends up caught in the middle of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another weekend, another chapter. (Yeah, we're a day late but it's still the weekend... ;-)  
> Wow, we're moving forward and we're getting closer to the end... Happy you're all sticking with us and for the many new kudos. We can't actually believe that we're only some kudos away from 500. This is more than amazing!  
> Thank you all so much... Enjoy the new chapter - if you can!!! ;-)

The kitchen's clock displays six o'clock on the dot when Even hears Sonja's heels echoing through the corridors of the building. He isn't surprised; on the contrary, he was waiting for her, having received a message from her announcing her return. 

As agreed with Isak, Even is finally ready to talk to Sonja, to confess everything to her, and above all, to put an end to this pointless relationship. Guessing that Sonja, more out of pride than out of a broken heart, would potentially target Isak, Even had asked him to wait in the guest room while he had his talk with his, hopefully, soon to be ex-fiancée. Considering how they've left things the day she left for her parents' house, Even hopes things can go smoothly. After all, Sonja seemed to be very lucid about them not working out anymore. There is no reason for her to have changed her mind between now and then.

Sadly, Even's hopes and expectations fly out of the window the second he hears Sonja unlocking the door and get inside their apartment in a whirlwind of rolling suitcases, followed by her voice calling him from afar, "hi, baby, I'm home!". Her voice is too cheerful, the nickname misplaced. This doesn't bode well in any way.

Heart in his throat Even decides to leave his spot in the kitchen to meet Sonja mid-way in the living room. When he finds her, she's busy taking off her coat and her shoes, and when she hears his steps, she looks up at him and gives him a wide, happy smile. After a couple of strides, she's facing him, and then, she takes his face between her hands and smacks him with an unexpected kiss, taking him completely off-guard. 

"It's so good to see you again!" She adds, hugging him tight into her arms, oblivious to how stiff and tense Even's body is.

It's fake. It's an act. He knows Sonja, and this- this isn't her. Even when they were head over heels in love, she never looked so... elated to see him after being apart from each other for a few days. And it makes even less sense now when they are on the edge of a break-up. A mutual break-up, last time they talked about it, so... why does it look like Sonja has changed her mind?!

"I'm so happy to be back!" She keeps on going, all smiles and high-pitched voice and arms all over him, not letting go of him for one second. "You know how much I love my parents but I'm not 20 anymore, a few days with them and I need to get away. They still see me as their little girl. But I guess it's normal, right? Anyway, how have you been? You look well-rested, you look great! You know what? I feel like going out. Maybe we should have a drink, go to the restaurant, what do you think, love?"

And as she keeps talking at a fast speed, never stopping long enough to let him say a word, Even blinks at her, beyond disconcerted. He doesn't understand what she's trying to do, why she's acting as if the last few weeks - hell, the last few months! - never happened, and why she's back at pretending that them being together is still something she wants. Because when she left, it was pretty clear she wasn't fond of the idea of spending the rest of her life with him much more than he was himself. It was just too scary to end a relationship of ten years without going through the classic "we need time to think on our own" step. But they were basically done, they both knew it.

Why does Sonja seem to not know it anymore...?

"I need to get changed if we are going out though. I hope I have my red dress ironed. You didn't distract Isak too much while I was away, did you?" Sonja asks, chuckling at her own words, making it sound like she's joking. Like they didn't have a whole argument just a week ago about her slapping Isak over him being too distracted by Even to do his tasks. 

It's unbelievable. But hearing Isak's name coming out of her mouth is finally what pushes Even to speak up and to stop this ridiculous comedy.

"Sonja," he says, grabbing her by the wrists as gently as possible to get away from her hands and push her away from him. "Sonja, what are you doing? What is this?"

"What are you talking about, baby?" She frowns at him, feigning ignorance in the most impudent way possible. She makes a move to touch him again but Even takes a step back.

"Don't 'baby' me, Sonja, are you serious? You left because we couldn't stand each other. We... We were about to break up. Why are you acting like we are making up?"

And the maddest thing is that Sonja never shows a single sign of anger. She keeps looking at him as if she loves him, which he knows is a lie - she doesn't, not anymore, not for a long time. 

"I... Well, we said we would think about what we want, right? I thought about it, and I want you, I want us together. I know I've been difficult, but I swear I'm going to be a better person for you. I will make it work. We will make it work, alright?" She says, smiling sweetly at him, and Even can barely recognize her. This isn't Sonja. It can't be. Sonja doesn't sweet-talk him, doesn't make compromises, doesn't admit her flaws, and doesn't bat her eyelashes at him.

"Wh-what? No," Even states, so stunned he can't even find subtle words to let her down easy. "We are done, Sonja, and you know it. You don't want us to be together, we make no sense. We don't love each other anymore."

"I do," she protests- she lies. 

"You don't," Even shakes his head. "And I don't." 

"You don't know what you're talking about, Even!" He stops listening to her, but he almost smiles from her words. This, this is Sonja. This is the real Sonja, who lies to herself and then tries to convince him he's incapable of having his own feelings and thoughts. This, this is familiar, and real, and not an act. 

"I'm in love with someone else, Sonja. Not you," he cuts her off in whatever manipulative rant she was on. Hearing him, she chokes on her last words and looks at him with wide eyes.

"Someone else? What are you talking about? Come on, Even, don't be ridiculous. Who would you fall in love with out of now-"

Again, he doesn't let her finish. "Isak. I'm in love with Isak."

This is the first time he utters these words out loud, and he is surprised at how true and right they sound. He also realizes that Isak has never heard them, which is something he should rectify as soon as this discussion with Sonja is over. 

The silence stretches between them, Sonja staring at him in a mix of confusion and shock, mouth agape.

And then, Sonja bursts out laughing. 

"The robot," she laughs, but it's bitter, it hides a rising anger Even knows all too well. "You're in love with... the goddamn robot, that's what you're telling me?" She shakes her head, and he can almost hear her think how silly Even is being again. "Did you take your meds?"

And, ah. Of course. It had to come.

"Yes, you know I did. I'm not delusional, Sonja," he sighs. This conversation is lasting far too long for his liking. There is no discussion to have, he doesn't have to prove anything to her. "Isak and I, we are a thing. We've been for a while now which... I know, I'm a piece of shit for going behind your back but-"

"You are a thing?" Sonja is the one interrupting him this time.

"Yes?"

"Like... You're dating the robot?"

"I'm dating Isak, yes," he rectifies with a huff. "We want to be together, as a couple. We are going to be."

Next thing he knows, Sonja is throwing a furious fist on the table, hitting it so hard he's afraid she broke her hand. But it only lasts a second, and she seems fine enough, physically, when she grabs him by the collar of his shirt.

"I'm so done with your bullshit, Even! For the last fucking time, it's a robot. It's a thing. You think he's in love with you?! It doesn't have feelings, Even, it's a piece of metal!"

Slowly, coldly, Even pulls away from her tight grip and puts some distance between them again. "I know it's hard for you to fathom because you can't think any other way than your way, but he does. He's different. He's not what you think he is. He has feelings. Real, genuine feelings. And I think, deep down, you know that, or you wouldn't be yelling at me, trying to convince me of the opposite."

Sonja turns away from him like she can't even bear the sight of him anymore, and it's such a contrast to how she acted with him just minutes ago, it's finally what makes everything clearer. Now, Even understands what happened. He should have guessed it even sooner.

"Sonja," he whispers, lowering his voice, trying to reach out to her most reasonable part. "Is it about... your parents? You told them we were most likely calling the wedding off, that we were breaking up and they didn't take it well?" 

This is it, Even is sure of it: Sonja's parents turning everything into her failing and being a disgrace. They probably told her to fix her relationship because their daughter canceling her wedding is worse than her marrying a fuck-up like him. No matter how little they think of him, they still chose to keep up appearances over their daughter's happiness. Unbelievable. But so typical of them.

And on his words, she turns around, face all red and eyes wide, the truth written all over her face because Even knows how to read it by now, but even then, she finds a way to tell him, "you don't know what you're talking about, Even. This isn't about my parents. This is about you..." She pauses. Even knows he's right. Sonja knows Even is right. And yet, she's still going for a fight. She's still looking for words to crush him but it won't work, it won't-

"This is about you," she starts again, her features hardening, "forcing your own twisted feelings on the... on Isak. It's about you, making Isak say he likes you too."

"Wh-what?" He hears himself stutter, far away, as he can feel his world slowly dissolve. He wasn't expecting her to say something like that. Not something that would make him doubt everything all over again. But she's good at it, after all. "What does it mean, what…"

"Isak is a robot, right? Even you can't deny he's a robot." He doesn't say anything, because it's true. Isak became the world to him, but in his nature, he remains a robot. "So he does what his owners ask him to do, right? That's his purpose. That's his program." He can see where this is going, and he can barely breathe already from the hard truth weighing on him. So far, everything she said is right and undeniable. "So what I think, Even, is that you forced your feelings on Isak and Isak is just doing what he thinks his owner wants: he's pretending to be in love with you, for you."

Even doesn't want to listen to her, doesn't want to believe her, and yet… His brain doesn't care. Soon, he's reliving everything he has ever shared with Isak, all the precious, heart-warming moments, and all he can see now is that, by trying to connect with him, by sharing his world with him, maybe he has put ideas in Isak's mind- or, system, that Isak has never actually wanted. After all, Even has been the one insisting on giving Isak a name. He's the one who made him watch movies with him, who taught him feelings and emotions by doing so. Isak never asked for any of it in the first place. And maybe he has never actually learned any of it, or not the way Even thought.

What if all they had shared, the complicity, the intimacy, the closeness, and the love- what if it hadn't been the result of Isak's awoken feelings, but had instead, purely and simply, been the result of Isak executing what he had interpreted as being Even's wants and needs? What if Isak didn't learn to feel for himself… but learned to be Even's wildest fantasy? His very personal incarnation of a perfect other half for him?

All of a sudden, everything becomes clear: none of it has been real. Even has only seen what he wanted to see. 

That's something Isak would have laughed about weeks ago, but, Even doesn't know any other way to describe it: inside his chest, he feels his heart shatter into pieces. It's the kind of invisible pain that paralyzes you, makes you doubt your sanity. And as he keeps recalling beloved moments shared with Isak, until their magical night together, barely a couple of nights ago, the wound spreads, crushing his hopes, sweeping away his certainties. 

Isak isn't in love with him, because Isak doesn't know what love is. He can't: he's a robot. What he knows is to do whatever his owner wants or needs him to do. So that's what he did. At a time when Even was craving for a movie-like love, a love that doesn't hurt or put him down, a love that would finally make him feel good, feel seen and understood, Isak gave it to him. Not because he felt the same way, but because it was his purpose. 

The hard truth is: Even has been fooling himself all along.

"None of it was real."

Even hears the words but can't tell if they belong to Sonja or him. The world is a blur around him, everything feels far away - like a dream, like a nightmare. Everything feels far away except the fear and the pain inside him. He has to sit down, no longer feeling his legs. 

"You're pathetic," Sonja spits out the words like venom.

When Even meets her eyes, there is no doubt she means it. She's meant it all along, even when she was composed enough to pretend she loved him still.

"I guess you're still getting what you wanted," she adds, and after a while, Even realizes she's no longer standing in front of him. She's putting her shoes and coat on again. "I'm leaving you. You're finally free from me." It doesn't feel like he's getting what he wanted at all though. She made sure to take everything away from him before she did.

Everything?

"I'm not okay," he whispers to himself. He remembers taking his meds every day at the right time. He knows mania, he knows this isn't it. So what's happening? Is he really so miserable that he couldn't see he was living in a delusion?

"No, you're not," Sonja nods, her voice gentle and careful all over again. "And I'm going to help you like I always do." She has always had a soft spot for this particular version of him: distraught, broken… weak. But Even doesn't see it for what it really is, another act, until she speaks again... 

"I will take your trouble away like I always do." 

… Until she rips what's left of his heart from his body...

"I will take Isak with me, and you will let me because you know that's what's best for you. It's the only chance you get of not completely sinking into madness, you understand?"

… And now, she's really taking everything away from him.

For him, the world stops spinning. His world ceases to exist. 

He hears Sonja walking away, asking in the distance where Isak is. He doesn't say a word, doesn't move away from his seat, just stares at nothing, waiting, waiting, waiting- for what?

When Sonja comes back with Isak, Even doesn't fight her, just like she said. He doesn't even look up at Isak, doesn't have the courage to meet his eyes. He doesn't want to know if Isak is indifferent, or if… Or if he's looking just as broken as him.

Even can't figure out which option would be worse: the one where he would face Isak's real nature or the one where he would have to face what he has done to Isak, forcing feelings that aren't his own onto him.

And because he is a coward, Even closes his eyes and waits for him to disappear.

***

Isak is confused when Sonja opens the door of the guest room.

While he has heard the fight between her and Even, he has tried not to listen too much as he was too scared of what might be the result of their fight. It's not that he doesn't trust Even to tell Sonja the truth - it's rather that he is scared that Even might let her talk him down, let her manipulate him into something. Because from what Isak has gathered about their relationship so far, that's exactly the kind of thing she would do. And, as much as he wishes it wasn't the case, Even doesn't think highly enough of himself to stop her from doing so.

And the worst about this is: Isak is pretty sure that it's Sonja's fault that Even thinks like this about himself. Because that's the way she has treated him, has made him feel - at least, since they acquired Isak.

"Can you pack more of my stuff into two bags?" She doesn't look at him while she talks and she paces around the guest room like a maniac. "More clothes and some of my books, especially the medical books. And my things from the bathroom. We'll have to get the rest of my things soon - maybe we can do it next week."

Isak frowns up at her but nods while getting up from the guest bed. He will pack all the things she wants for her if it means that she will leave.

Once he has packed two more bags with Sonja's stuff, though, Sonja asks him to do another thing. A thing that throws Isak off track within a millisecond. "You done? Great. Now you can pack your bag and then we can finally leave this place. For good."

Isak drops her bags in shock and stares at her, his mouth gaping and his eyes as big as plates.

It cannot mean what he thinks… It just simply cannot.

"M-my bag?" He asks Sonja, still confused, still shocked. "I'm not sure what you… Why would I need a bag?"

"Because you're coming with me."

Everything just stops when Sonja finishes her sentence. The world stops turning, his CPU stops working, literally everything stops. If he had a heart, it would stop working too.

This can't be real.

What the hell happened during their talk that makes Sonja think she can take Isak with her? Why isn't Even doing anything about this? Where is he? Has Sonja done something to him? He doesn't think Sonja is a (physically) violent person but Even being hurt seems to be the only possible reason why he hasn't put an end to this yet.

So, he ignores Sonja's instruction to go pack his things and gathers all his senses that he has lost for a moment to go check on Even.

But when he tries to push past Sonja to get to the living room, she stops him. She puts a hand on his arm and says, "that is not the way to the guest room, Isak."

Isak wants to spit at her and tell her to fuck off but he can't. He's already violating his programming and he can feel it. He stops and looks at Sonja, desperation written all over his face, and she knows. She fucking knows what she's doing to him and that he can't do anything about it. And she fucking enjoys it, too. "Pack. Your. Things. Now."

"What did you do to Even?" Isak wants to know, his voice sounding strained because he has to fight against himself to not walk to the guest room and pack his bag. "What happened? Is he okay?"

"He's perfectly fine, robot. He's sitting in the living room and waiting for us to leave," Sonja replies with a sneer. "Guess fucking a robot wasn't as great as he thought it would be... now pack!"

It feels like she is hitting him right across the face all over again, but this time with her words.

Isak stops fighting and walks to the guest room to pack his very few belongings - some clothes and a book that Even has given to him a while ago.

_Guess fucking a robot wasn't as great as he thought it would be..._

That can't be it, can it? Their first time had been amazing. For Isak at least. And he thought it had been just as good for Even as well. Could he be so wrong?

And what about everything else that they have? Isak can't believe that it was all pretense and a game. That is not the kind of person that Even is. He is honest, he is kind and he is sweet. Sonja is just trying to get into his head to hurt him for what they did to her.

But then why is Even still not coming here to stop this madness? Why does he let Sonja take him?

What if the one thing that Isak was sure of during this confusing time - Even's feelings for him, the thing they had between them - hasn't been real at all? Is it possible? Is Even such a good actor that he could make Isak believe that he was really in love with him?

 _Or_ … Isak gulps.

He doesn't want to ask Sonja about it - but she is the only person he can ask if his assumption were to be true. Because she would be the only one to know - then again, she would most probably also just lie to him about it.

Isak plays back as many moments between Even and him as he can before Sonja comes to get him. He tries to see them from a different angle, tries to look at it without all his feelings and subjective views, tries to scour them for any signs… But he can't. No matter how hard he tries, all he can see is Even smiling at him, Even laughing, Even touching him. Nothing about Even and him can be seen objectively because it is, in its very essence, subjective and full of feelings.

So, there's no way for him to say if Even was maybe having an episode if he just _thinks_ he is in love with Isak because his brain is fucking with him.

But it's the only reasonable explanation that Isak can come up with.

And it hurts.

It feels like someone is hitting him in the stomach with a baseball bat. It feels like someone is reaching through his skin - synthetic and metal - to rip out his cables. It feels like he will never be able to feel anything close to happiness ever again. And how can he, really? Even is the one that brought happiness into his life.

Now Sonja is the one to take it all away again. And he probably is very hypocritical for blaming her for it since he is the one who came into her life and tried to take Even away from her.

"What is taking you so goddamn long?" Sonja calls to him from the door. She looks at him, fire and rage still burning in her eyes, and sighs. "You literally have two things to pack… Come on now. We have to leave."

Isak slouches and takes his bag before he walks up to her. He looks at the floor, one of his feet moving nervously. "Can I… is he sick?" He eventually asks in a low whisper. "Is that what has been happening? I know you hate me and all that… And I guess I can understand that… but can you please tell me the truth?" Insecurely, he looks up at her now, imploring her to tell him the truth. "Is Even having an episode and that is why he thought he was in love with me? Did I make it worse for him because I didn't recognize the signs? I never meant to hurt him or anything…"

Sonja frowns at him and then looks away before nodding. "Yeah, Even is definitely not well right now. And you pretending to reciprocate his made-up feelings wasn't helping."

"Pretending? No, I wasn't pretending, Sonja," Isak rectifies, a little outraged. "I do reciprocate his feelings. I'm in love with him… I…" Isak smiles sadly to himself. It's the first time he has ever said this and it will probably be the last time. "I love him… I'm sorry for not seeing that he is sick. He hasn't shown any signs."

"Falling in love with a goddamn robot isn't enough of a sign for you? What kind of a normal person does this?"

Isak retreats from her and shakes his head. "Even is normal," is all he can say, though, because the rest is probably true. There is no report of a human falling in love with a robot ever. Yes, humans use robots for all kinds of things, including as escorts and for sex - "using them" is the important distinction here. They do not fall in love with them, they do not have relationships with them.

"We're leaving now. Come on, take the bags," Sonja commands and walks away towards the living room.

Isak picks up his bag and then also takes the ones he packed for Sonja before he quickly follows her, not wanting to infuriate her even further. But as soon as he steps into the living room he has to stop again.

Even is sitting on the floor, crouched against the wall and looking at nothing. He isn't even looking up to look at him.

Isak wants to drop the bags, run to him, and hug him so tight that he will be barely able to breathe. And then, he wants to kiss him all over the place and whisper on every spot of exposed skin that it will be alright, that he will be okay.

But he doesn't.

Because he doesn't want to make him feel worse and because Sonja would probably shut him down for good if he did.

And that's when another realization hits him like a freight train.

He will have to go with Sonja, live with her, for God knows how long. What if Even doesn't want him back at all when he feels better again? What if that's not even the plan, no matter what happens? That means he will be at Sonja's mercy for the rest of his existence - which, knowing Sonja, could end anytime if he as much as looks at her the wrong way.

"Even..." Isak whispers, waiting, hoping against hope that Even will look up at him and tell him to stay.

But Even doesn't react to him at all. He just keeps looking at the floor, waiting for him to go. And it hurts all over again, probably even more than before. Because hearing from Sonja that he will have to go with her and that Even doesn't want him anymore is one thing. But seeing for himself that it's true is another and it's killing him.

"We're leaving, come on." It's Sonja - again - snapping him out of it and urging him on.

However, Isak can't react, he can't stop looking at Even, waiting for him to acknowledge him in any way.

But he doesn't.

Isak feels like there is another blow to his stomach with the baseball bat and it brings tears to his eyes that quickly start to fall, wetting his t-shirt. And once he has started, he can't stop anymore and within seconds he's full-on sobbing.

For a while he's just standing there, crying, hoping against hope that Even will do something to stop this madness.

Instead, Sonja grabs his arm once she's had enough and drags him towards the door. "Let's get out of here," she hisses. "I can't take this shitshow any longer. And stop crying for God's sake. You're a robot, not a cry baby."

He doesn't stop crying - he keeps looking at Even through his tears until Sonja has shoved him out of the flat and throws the door closed behind them.

This is it.

This is the end of everything.

Isak knows it sounds ridiculous and he knows that it's not the truth. He knows that he will have to keep going on, keep being hurt until someone will finally put an end to his misery and shut him down for good. If he had the power to do it himself, he would do it right now and right here.

His world has ended, what's the point of going on?

***

When they arrive at their destination, Isak is still incapable of understanding what just happened. His vision is blurred due to the tears still escaping his eyes when he thinks back to the scenario. But it's not blurry enough for him to not recognize the person that is opening the door for them.

And Isak wants to shut down immediately when he sees her.

He thought it couldn't get worse than having to leave with Sonja, that leaving his home, leaving Even, was as bad as it could get. But no… Sonja has taken him to her friend Bente.

Vivid memories of their encounter at the supermarket cross Isak's mind and he makes himself as small as possible, looking down at his feet. He doesn't want to look at Bente, he doesn't want to stay here with these people.

He just wants to go back to Even.

But Even has let Sonja take him… He has done nothing to stop her from taking Isak. He doesn't want Isak anymore, he doesn't care for him. Maybe, if it's really true, and it has been nothing more than an episode, he never did.

It still makes no sense whatsoever to him but that is what happened like an hour ago. The image of the closing door is burnt into Isak's mind forever. Just like the sight of Even, a picture of misery, crouched down on the floor, not looking at Isak at all.

He will never get these pictures out of his mind again.

Never.

" _Adrian_! For god's sake..." He snaps out of his thoughts and looks up at Sonja who's fuming next to him. "Get my bags from the car and get them into the house. And you better be quick about it, you've already cost me enough nerves today."

Isak blinks his tears away and nods slowly before he walks to the car to get the few bags with the necessities Sonja has packed from the flat. As he walks away, he can hear Bente slander: "What a useless piece of technology. Or is this Even's fault?"

Upon hearing Even's name, Isak's non-existent heart hurts all over again and he has to bite his lip hard to stop himself from crying again.

He barely manages and picks up his speed to get Sonja's bags out of the car before he gets another insult thrown at him. Every step hurts him and he is very close to just shut himself down and let himself fall to the ground right now and right here.

It's only been an hour since they left - how is he supposed to continue like this? For how long will he have to?

Quickly, he gets the bags and carries them into the house under the scrutinizing looks of Sonja and her friend. Isak tries to ignore them as best as he can as he walks into the entrance hall of the house. There, he stops and carefully looks up at Bente. "Where should I put them?"

"Do you have no manners whatsoever?" Bente says instead of replying, looking from him to Sonja in outrage. Isak sighs quietly - and it's apparently too much because the next thing he knows is that he gets a hard smack to his right cheek. "I don't know what Even taught you that makes you think you can act like this, robot. But this will stop now! You will learn to behave appropriately and you will do as you're asked!"

While Isak holds his aching cheek, Sonja just nods along. "Sorry about that. Being Even's little toy for a while made him think he's almost human or something…" 

Isak wants to start crying all over again but he knows that it won't do him any good, so he swallows his tears and clears his throat to croak out: "I'm sorry, Madam. If you would be so kind as to tell me where I can put my mistress' bags, I will move them out of your way immediately, Madam."

Bente nods and tells him, in the rudest way possible, where he can put Sonja's and his stuff, urging him to hurry the fuck up because there are other things he will need to do after that.

"Yes, Madam," Isak yields and takes as many bags as he can carry as he hurries into the house and up the stairs to the third floor where, according to Bente, Sonja will have the whole floor to herself.

The house is huge and elegant with lots of charm. It's taken care of as well and Isak almost can't believe that a person like Bente lives in such a nice house. How is that fair? He also can't imagine that she is doing anything to afford this house; it's probably all her husband's doing.

After Isak has run down again to get the remaining bags and put them in the guest bedroom with the other ones, Sonja comes in. She leans against the closet, crossing her arms in front of her chest. "You cannot act like that in front of my friend! Bente is nice enough to take us in and this is how you behave?! It's embarrassing for me, Adrian! It's disgusting how Even has let you act! This will have to stop right now, understand? You're a robot and you need to know your place."

"Y-yes, Madam," Isak says, cowering before her. He hates the way she makes him feel so much but there's nothing he can do about it. If there's one thing that he understands about feelings by now is that they're not controllable. And even if there's a shred of anger in him as well, he knows he can't act on it. Because he's too scared of her and because his programming won't let him do much more than give weak protests. Also, right now, he doesn't have the strength to do anything.

"You better… I'm not willing to put up with your bullshit forever. I have no problem putting you in your place and neither has Bente. You will do everything she tells you to do, just like you do for me. You will obey her and her husband and even their kid. You know, if he could talk, you'd even have to take orders from the dog… That's how low your status is. And I don't fucking care if Even made you believe otherwise. You're nothing, robot. Nothing."

Gulping, Isak looks down to his feet. There are more tears and he bites his lip as hard as he possibly can to stop them from falling. "I know, Madam… I won't act out anymore. But can I please ask you something? What about Even? Will he be alright, did you get him some help? I'm not sure if he should be on his own now."

Before he can even take a breath after he has finished, Sonja's hand heavily lands on his already aching cheek. 

"You're not allowed to ask fucking questions!" She almost screams into his face, hitting him again. "And stop with Even! He doesn't give a shit about you! No one gives a shit, can you get that in that dumb robot brain of yours? You're nothing but a machine that people use to do their work and fill their needs. Until they're done with you and then they get rid of you."

Slowly, the tears are spilling over again. His cheek is burning with pain and the tears do nothing to soothe it, on the contrary.

Isak wants to crash onto the bed, hug the pillow and hide under the duvet until it's time to recharge - but he can't. Sonja won't let him, he knows. So, he stays there, crying silent tears and waiting for further instructions while his fucking CPU keeps repeating her words to him over and over again, hurting him a little more every time.

Even doesn't give a shit about him. It was just his sickness, making him think he has feelings for Isak.

No one gives a shit about him.

He's all alone in this world.

"Stop crying, goddammit. What is wrong with you?" Sonja keeps shouting and by now, Isak feels like his ears are ringing. "Unpack the bags and put everything away neatly. I don't want to see any wrinkles in my clothes. Then you can put fresh sheets on my bed and clean the room a bit. It hasn't been used in a while, so I want it nice and fresh. The bathroom will need to be cleaned, as well. When you're done, you can come down. I think Bente will have more work for you."

Isak manages to nod but when Sonja finally closes the door behind her, he can't take it anymore.

He sinks down on the bed and cries. For how long, he doesn't know. But when he comes back to himself, his eyes are puffy and he feels sick. He's never felt sick before and he knows he can't get sick but he literally feels like his insides are convulsing as if they want him to throw up - which he can't because there's nothing inside of him that can be vomited out. He's just metal and cables - like Sonja told him.

A thing that nobody cares about.

A thing that shouldn't care about anyone either. But he does… He cares so much for Even that it hurts.

Isak hopes that Even is alright, that he has called Mikael or Eskild to help him. It doesn't even really matter if Even loves him back, as long as he will be okay. He can't live with the thought that Even might not be okay.

Maybe he can manage to snitch Sonja's or Bente's phone later so that he can call Eskild and tell him to go check on Even? He doesn't know how to do that but he will at least have to try.

With this thought giving him some strength, Isak gets up from the bed and starts with the tasks Sonja has given him.

***

Even lost track of time after the fifth hour of staring at the ceiling, lying in his bed - the bed that became Isak's and his over the past week, the bed he has shared with him, made love in it. This time seems so far away now, feels all like a dream, and that's the irony, isn't it? He can't tell what's been part of his dream, of the fantasy he has built inside his mind, and what's been reality.

When Even presses his nose into the pillow, he swears he can smell Isak's scent, but it doesn't bring him any comfort: it's not Isak, to start, and it might not be Isak he's smelling either, because do robots even have a scent? Even doesn't know anything for sure anymore.

But after all, it's the story of his life. How many times has Even lost touch with reality? Losing himself into chimeras, into stories he has created himself and then believed to be true so hard that he forgot he was the root of it. How many times did he almost ruin his career over it? Believing himself to be the next movie genius, getting on wild projects, sometimes good, sometimes bad. Sometimes burning everything on his way to the top, sometimes being the one crashing and burning.

It never occurred to him, though, that he could lie to himself to the point of making up a whole love story about himself and someone who had no desire to love him back. Who _couldn't_ love him back.

How pathetic is he to believe he was deserving of the kind of love he thought he had found with Isak? Of course, it could have only been a delusion.

And so now he's all alone. Not just in his head, but also physically, for the first time in… Even can't even remember. 

The thing is, he doesn't regret Sonja, but he doesn't regret Isak either, although he should. He's empty and heartbroken, left with nothing but shattered, falsified memories, and yet, he can't bring himself to regret the time he had with Isak. 

Isak. His sweet and precious boy, who was never a boy nor his.

Even wonders how Isak is doing right now if Sonja is taking her anger on him again (the simple thought of it makes his stomach twist and he feels sick from it, so he decides to push it back in a faraway corner of his brain) if he's asking about Even or if he doesn't think about him at all. When Sonja took Isak away from him, Even didn't dare look up and watch the scene, because he's a coward, always has been. But he didn't need to see it to know, to _hear_ with his own ears, that Isak was crying.

It broke his heart all over again. He almost gave up and ran to him, to take him into his arms, to soothe his cries, to tell him everything's going to be okay, over and over again, until Even starts to believe it himself.

But he didn't do it, none of it. He kept his head down and waited for Sonja to take his safe haven away from him. The person he has felt so strongly about that, at night, when they were both lying in bed, Isak snuggled against his body, he has dared to think, _I believe he is the man of my dreams, the love of my life_.

It was a dangerous thought, back then.

It's nothing but a foolish one, now.

And so, with nothing but his mind and his memories to dwell on, Even loses track of time. Hours go by. Days go by. Days and nights follow each other on the ceiling. His phone, laying on the bedside table, ran out of battery a long time ago. He should be back at work to supervise the end of the editing process, but everything seems pointless now. 

And even if he wanted to, Even doesn't think he could get out of bed anyway. He doesn't remember the last time he got up to go to the bathroom, to eat or drink anything. 

But maybe, he thinks… Maybe, if he waits long enough, the pain will fade away, _he_ will fade away. Maybe the memory of Isak will dissolve like an old photograph consumed by fire. Maybe.

Truth be told though, Even doesn't believe it for a second, for he knows he could never forget Isak.

*

Along the way, Even must have fallen asleep, because, at some time between day and night, he's startled awake by the sound of the doorbell.

Of course, his first reaction is to ignore it, to drag the blanket over his head and hide from the rest of the world, folding in on himself. And he feels a pinch to the heart when he slowly realizes he can't smell Isak on the sheet anymore. He's well and truly gone as if he had never existed.

The doorbell stops ringing eventually, whoever came to bother him in his misery must have walked away. For a delirious second, Even contemplates the possibility that it could have been Isak running back to him, but it's, once again, only a delusion. Sonja would never let him. Or, scratch that, it's not even the main obstacle. Why would Isak want it in the first place? Even keeps forgetting Isak has only ever been with him out of duty, not desire.

And then, for the second time of the day, Even is being snapped out of his self-deprecating thoughts by someone, not ringing at the front door, no; but slamming the bedroom door open and then rushing to him to abruptly pull the cover off him, making him sit up reluctantly.

"Even, what the fuck! I thought you were dead or something! Can't you pick up your goddamn phone?!" Mikael is yelling at him, looking both mad and scared, and Even almost feels bad for ghosting him. He forgot some people still foolishly care about his well-being. He also forgot Mikael has a spare key to the apartment.

"I'm not dead, so, it's all fine," he mumbles dismissively before drawing the blanket on him again.

Mikael stops him half-way through it. "Excuse me?! You don't look fine at all. Are you… Is it an episode? What the hell happened here?!" He asks, pointing at the mess in the bedroom, the half-empty wardrobe, the remaining signs of Sonja and Isak leaving. 

Even sighs at the prospect of having to explain to Mikael everything that happened. Not only does the prospect seem too exhausting, but he also doesn't feel strong enough to hear his own best friend calling him out on his mistakes - Sonja did it already, he doesn't need to be reminded again of how ridiculous and sick his behavior has been. He got the memo by now.

"Even," Mikael calls his name, much more softly and carefully this time, as he sits on the edge of the bed beside him. "Where is Sonja? Or more importantly, where is _Isak_? What happened here?"

Defeated, Even lies down and turns his back on Mikael, unable to look him in the eye. "They left, both of them."

"What?! Sonja and you broke up? For real? And Isak left? What, _why_?"

"Yes, I told her I… I was in love with someone else. We got into a fight. She said I was delusional. She packed her things and she… she took Isak with her."

Behind him, Mikael falls silent for a long time - or at least, what feels like a very long time. Even is holding his breath, considering whether he should finish his explanation or not, but eventually, Mikael beats him on it.

"You fell in love with Isak," he states, and his voice is steady. He doesn't sound surprised or disgusted or even worried. It almost feels like… He knew already.

"How…" Even starts but doesn't dare go through with his question.

"It was obvious. You never looked happier than when you spoke about Isak. And I've known you for a very long time, I saw you with Sonja, I saw you without her, I thought I knew what happiness looked like on you, but with him, it was… Somewhere else entirely."

It makes Even turn around to face Mikael after all. Because now, he can't help but wonder, if his best friend could tell his feelings for Isak, why didn't he try to warn him? Why did he let him run straight into a wall? Even is brought back to that night at the bar, when he called Mikael and confessed he no longer loved Sonja. When Mikael hinted at him he knew something was going on between him and Isak. 

Why didn't he say something back then?

"I'm sick," Even says in a whisper. "I made it all up. I thought Isak and I were in love, that we could be together as… as a real couple. I was leaving Sonja to be with him. But it was all fake. It was all in my head. Isak didn't love me back, he _can't_ . He just pretended to be because..." But Even can't bring himself to say it. _Because it's his duty._

"You didn't seem manic to me, last time I saw you," Mikael retorts, and the worst part is, Even is tempted to agree. Even now, he doesn't feel like he had an episode. But maybe it doesn't have anything to do with his bipolar disorder. Maybe it's just him being pathetic and desperate enough to believe in lies. Maybe he has just lost his mind in general. "And why are you saying Isak was pretending? He looks at you like you are the center of the universe. He has always looked completely enamored with you, it makes no sense."

For some reason, it makes Even angry, to hear his best friend speaking out loud all the things Even has taken for the truth for such a long time, too. Mikael has always been the person he could lean on, could trust that his opinions were genuine and objective, contrary to Sonja's manipulative words. So why, now that Even is obviously struggling with keeping touch with reality, is he indulging him in his foolish and dangerous fantasies? Why is he trying to push him back into his delusions?!

So Even snaps. "Mikael. Stop it. Isak is a robot. It's his program, his duty, to do what his owners want. I wanted to be loved so desperately, so that's what he did. He did it for _me_ , not because he felt something for me. He can't feel anything, you know that. Why are you- why-"

"I don't believe it for a second," Mikael cuts him off stubbornly. "I don't understand anything about robots and science and shit, but even _I_ could see Isak is different. You _know_ he is. Don't let Sonja put ideas into your head."

"If you truly believe that, then you're as crazy as I am," Even bites back. He can't hear any more of it, it needs to stop. "Mikael, please, leave me alone." And when Mikael refuses to move, he adds, "get the fuck out of my apartment. You're not helping me right now. You're making it worse. Get. Out."

The flash of hurt that runs through Mikael's eyes doesn't go unnoticed to him, but he can't dwell on it. He knows he is right. He can't let him convince him there is any hope, any future, with Isak. If he can't change the fact he's human and Isak is a robot, then there is nothing to expect from the two of them together. He's been wrong to think they could work out in any way. 

So, without adding anything else, Even turns his back on his best friend again, covers himself with the blanket, and shuts the world out. 

And he waits, waits, waits- until he hears Mikael walking away and shutting the door. Until he's left all alone again, just him and his broken brain and the shadow of Isak laying in bed next to him.


	14. alt jeg vil er å høre din stemme (all I want is to hear your voice)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even are both suffering until interventions are needed. Except, if one seems promising, the other fails, with irremediable consequences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... good luck, I guess?

After making sure that nobody is around, Isak sneaks out onto the balcony. Thankfully, since it's autumn, the sky over Frogner is already dark. He lets his eyes wander over the neighborhood for a while before he finally looks up at the sky. Quickly, he checks where the North is and looks until he has found what he was looking for among the stars.

There they are, as bright and as beautiful as ever, almost mocking him: the Andromeda and Perseus constellations.

Like every night when he gets the chance to sneak out here, Isak tries to find solace in the mythology and in his memories, but he can't.

Because unlike Andromeda he hasn't been saved from his monster. Because unlike Perseus, Even is not a monsterslayer. Because Even has his own demons to fight and is not ready to take on another battle. Because Even doesn't love him like Perseus loved Andromeda.

All the promises he made before their first kiss - that he never would get rid of him, that he only wants him - are nothing but empty words now. They don't matter anymore because Even has meant none of it.

And the worst thing is that Isak can't even blame him - it's not Even's fault that he's sick and it's not Even's fault that Isak didn't realize he was having an episode.

Isak can only blame himself for being so naive to think that a human would actually care about him.

Why would they?

He's just a machine to them, a pile of metal, nothing more. Sonja has made that clear to him more than once. And people like Bente and her husband show it to him on a daily basis. A robot is nothing but a robot and he won't be anything more ever. It doesn't matter that he has feelings and a consciousness and thoughts of his own. If anything, that makes him more of a freak in the eyes of humans.

Without taking his eyes off the stars, Isak sits down on one of the balcony chairs, knowing full well it's going to be mayhem if one of the humans sees him like this.

But he is fucking exhausted.

The warning is blinking, telling him to plug in as soon as possible, but Isak just needs some minutes on his own to process the day - and to suffer in peace.

There is a big difference in taking care of a three-bedroom apartment and a wholeass house with three stories. And then, there's also the fact that everyone is treating Isak like shit. There hasn't been a day since his arrival to the house that he hasn't been smacked, humiliated, screamed at, or ridiculed.

Especially Sonja seems to enjoy torturing him by telling him at any chance she gets that he has been nothing to Even. Nothing but an experiment, a sick idea of his, brought to the surface by his sickness, and a way for him to escape his relationship with her. But never more than that, never anything of meaning or substance. One time when she caught him sitting at the kitchen table, crying, she told him: "Did you think he's in love with you? He isn't - it's just a sick idea he had. He can never love you… No one ever will, robot."

Isak is pretty sure she enjoyed the fact that he cried even more after that, that she had made his heart break all over again.

She had given him all but two minutes before she gave him new tasks: the new furniture had arrived, Isak was supposed to carry it up to the third floor and arrange them according to Sonja's wishes. So, Isak has spent that afternoon and evening dragging heavy cardboards up the stairs and setting up shelves, a wardrobe, a bed, armchairs and so on. Barely making it to the socket at night to plug himself in.

And that's basically how all his days have been since he arrived here.

Working until exhaustion, feeling heartbroken, and getting yelled at. After that, plugging in and charging for 7 hours (which is barely enough, mind you); just to repeat the process all over again the next day.

To be quite honest, Isak isn't even sure anymore how many days have passed since Sonja took him away from Even. He thinks it might be six, maybe seven - but he isn't sure. Every day is just the same: an endless succession of chores.

Isak almost jumps from the chair when the balcony door opens but calms himself a little when he realizes it's only the child, Liv. She's too young to be mean to him - mostly she's just curious and wants Isak to play with her because her parents are always too busy and the babysitters would rather watch some movies on the big TV or study for uni. Isak tries to make a little time for her whenever he can, hoping that she'll end up being a kinder person than her parents one day.

Liv smiles at him broadly, showing off her missing teeth. "What are you doing out here, Adrian 2121?" She asks, standing right in front of his chair, looking up at him with big, questioning eyes. "It's cold, you should come inside and play with me!"

"I don't feel cold, Liv. I was just looking at the stars, you know?" He replies, taking solace in talking normally to someone for the first time this day.

But it doesn't last very long.

Before they can talk more, the door opens again and this time, it's Elias, Bente's husband, that appears on the balcony, quite obviously enraged. And he gets even more furious when he sees Isak sitting on their chair. "Liv, get inside… Go to your mamma, she's in the living room," he tells his daughter and waits for her to run past him with a sad look on her face and lowered eyes before he smashes the door shut and then moves to tower threateningly over Isak. "How dare you, robot?"

"I'm sorry, sir," Isak says repeatingly, while getting up from the chair quickly. "I didn't mean to… I was just… Sorry, I have no right, I know. I'm very sorry. I best go plug in now."

However, Elias stops him immediately. "No, not so fast," he says, clearly enjoying the power he has over Isak. He pushes him in the chest. "You have to stop acting like you're a human being. You're not, you're just a piece of shit doing the work humans are too busy to do. You know what you actually are? A modern day slave..."

Isak knows it's basically true - at least for people like Elias and Bente and Sonja. And right now, he isn't sure how many people are actually not like them. He's been in his little bubble with Even and Eskild and their friends for too long to realize how bad the world outside of his bubble actually is for his kind.

"Yes, sir," he whispers. "I'm sorry for acting like this. It won't happen again… I'm very sorry but I have to go plug in now, otherwise my system will shut down."

But again, when he tries to move, Elias won't let him pass. "Funny, isn't it? If it wouldn't mean that you won't be able to do all my work tomorrow, I would just let you shut down right here and let you sleep on the balcony floor in the cold. I mean, it doesn't matter anyways, does it? You can't feel anything - even though you'd like to believe that you do. You don't, robot! You're a computer in disguise and computers don't feel shit. They do what we tell them to do. You should do the same."

Quickly, Isak nods, hoping that it will appease Elias and that he will finally let him go to the little supply closet where Isak recharges overnight. "Yes, sir. You're right sir."

Eventually, Elias moves to the side and lets him go.

***

Despite what Even vaguely remembers saying to Mikael, his best friend decides to ignore it and come back. But not just once in a while to check on him, no: he comes back every day, sometimes twice a day. 

Mikael usually shows up in the morning, on his way to work, and spends an hour making breakfast for Even, bringing it to him in his bedroom and staring at him until Even takes a bite, opening the curtains and a window to let some light and fresh air inside even if Even protests about it, cleaning a bit after him and leaving a bottle of water in case he doesn't get out of bed to do something as basic as getting a glass of water (which he doesn't do, so deep down Mikael is right). 

Then, Mikael leaves for work but comes back by the end of the afternoon, ready to prepare a full meal for Even again, but before that, he makes sure to push Even out of bed to change the sheets or to force him into the bathroom, so he takes a shower or "at least, have a fucking piss, Even, I'm sure you don't remember the last time you peed", which, once again, isn't exactly wrong - Even doesn't remember, probably because he doesn't if Mikael doesn't make him. That's how low he's fallen.

And the irony of the whole situation isn't lost on him: just like Isak used to, Mikael makes sure he's eating, makes his dishes and cleans his underwear and just makes sure he stays alive. Once again, he has someone to take care of him, someone who deserves better than losing his time on such a useless, pathetic mess like him. Isak deserves so much more than that kind of life. And so does his best friend.

But, just as stubborn as Isak was, Mikael brushes all of his complaints off and keeps coming back, day after day, desperately trying to help Even to get better.

Because, if he's sure he wasn't manic when he fell in love with Isak, he's also positive that losing him pushed him into depression. The sorry state he's in: this is depression, no doubt about that, if anything else.

So days blend into each other, only punctuated by Mikael's comings and goings and the course of the sun on the ceiling of his room.

How many days have passed since Sonja took Isak away? Since Even has cowardly let her do it, without so much as an objection? 

Slowly, Even's sorrow and disappointment melt into something different, something somehow even more painful: guilt. The more he thinks about it, the guiltier Even feels of his apathetic behavior when Sonja decided to take Isak with her. Not because he doesn't believe her to be right about his delusions and Isak's non-existent feelings for him anymore, but because, despite all of it, he should have been strong enough to protect Isak from her. She's never been kind to Isak, but after what happened, even if she claims Isak is nothing but a harmless robot, there is no way she doesn't hold grudges against him and wouldn't make him pay for making her fiancé fall in love with him.

No matter if Isak was pretending or not, and no matter to what extent he was, the truth is, Even has made a promise to him, to protect him from Sonja, but at the first obstacle, he has let him down. He has betrayed Isak by letting his persecutor take him away. 

He's been weak. He's been everything he has never wanted to be: unreliable.

"I failed him, Mikael," Even whispers when Mikael materializes into his room, drawing the curtains shut for the night. Even is sitting on the edge of the mattress, has been staring at nothing for who knows how long.

Mikael frowns, turning around to face him. "What?"

"Isak. I let him down. Sonja… I can't trust her to treat him well. I told him he didn't have to be scared of her anymore, but he's with her right now, I can't begin to imagine-" His voice breaks along the way, worries and sobs stuck in his throat. For a brief, maddening second, he almost wishes to choke on it, but it would be such a cowardly thing to do, again, leaving Isak all alone for good.

"Even," Mikael calls softly, kneeling next to him. "He's not your responsibility."

"Of course he was!" Even protests, finds the strength for it, which is a miracle in itself after days of listlessness. "He's not free the way we are. He depended on me, and on Sonja, but you can imagine how she was acting with him, so he had me. Nobody else. I was supposed to protect him from her, you understand?!"

"Okay, okay, Even, calm down," Mikael tries to soothe him. "I get it, I'm sorry. Do you know where Sonja went?"

He doesn't. Even realizes, she didn't tell him where she was going. Could she be at her parents'? It seems unlikely, not so soon after their break-up, not after coming back ready to jump into a dead relationship just to please her parents. It wouldn't make any sense. So where?

"It's fine, we can find out where she went," his best friend speaks again, taking his silence for what it is: an admission of ignorance. "Maybe you can call her?"

For the first time in days, Even snorts. "Call her? Yeah, right, I bet she would even propose to drive Isak back here if I asked nicely enough."

"Be subtle, dumbass," Mikael rolls his eyes. "Try to find out without making it clear you want to take Isak home."

Even only considers it for a second before he shakes his head in defeat. "She would know, she always knows. And even if I could figure out where she is, she would probably call the fucking cops on me the second she sees me."

Mikael opens and closes his mouth several times before giving up. That's something Sonja is very likely to do, and even Mikael's optimism can't change that.

"Okay so… So what?"

So what, huh? Even lets out a long sigh, guilt creeping inside him again. What if it's too late? What if it can't be fixed, and he doomed Isak to a lifetime of mistreatments the second he let him walk out of the apartment, days ago?

"So nothing," Even mutters before lying back in his bed, all energy gone, the burden of his guilt and his mistakes and how much he misses Isak weighing him down. 

He mutes Mikael and the world around him, and later, falls asleep wondering if Isak is waiting for him, if he's still hoping for him to show up and save him.

He wonders if Isak is disappointed in him, or if he's known all along that Even wasn't brave enough to fight for him the way he promised he would.

***

It's too much.

Isak doesn't know for how much longer he will be able to go on like this. It's been two weeks now and Isak is at the edge of a breakdown - both system-wise and emotionally. He can't do it anymore and, quite frankly, he doesn't want to either.

What's the use anyways?

Why should he keep going if this is all that his life will be from now on? Why is he still hoping against hope that someone (Even) will rescue him from this hell?

No one will come and save him.

No one.

He's alone in this world, a machine no one cares about - a machine that has to get his tasks done in time and nothing else.

And that's what he's trying to do. But it's getting harder and harder for him every day and that's not only because he's still distracted by his thoughts about Even and his broken non-existent heart (he has come to terms with using this human expression for how he's feeling because it's the only thing that remotely describes how he's feeling). It's because Sonja and their hosts are giving him more and more tasks while leaving him less time to recharge at the same time.

They're overworking Isak, though they'd never admit it. Also, as long as Isak still manages, they simply don't care that he all but crawls back to the supply closet at night to plug himself in and that his battery is only at about 87% (or sometimes even less) when he has to go back to work in the mornings. They don't care that he doesn't even find the time to plug in for a quick charge during the day because up until now it hasn't happened yet that he shuts down somewhere in the house and falls to the floor.

But it's a close thing, Isak knows. He's at one, maybe two percent of battery in the evening before he can get to the socket.

He can't continue like this for much longer. Not only because it's exhausting - it also leaves damage to his batteries and hardware. But again, no one really cares. They'll probably just get a new robot once he's too damaged to do the work.

In fact, Isak doesn't even know why they just don't return him. Is it Sonja's special kind of torture for him, her revenge on him?

Despite, in theory, not being able to, Isak hates her with all his heart.

Yes, he has wronged her and he shouldn't have fallen in love with Even and he shouldn't have been with him while Sonja and him were still engaged, but she is taking this way too far by now. Would she do the same to a human competitor? Isak isn't sure… He thinks it might add to her frustration and anger that he is a robot and that she would've stopped by now if he were human, but he can't say for sure.

Isak sighs and checks his battery - he is at 4% and there's still so much he has to do. This house is simply too big for him to take care of everything that needs to be done. Or well, everything the humans say needs to be done. A lot of the tasks Isak is given are quite unnecessary, really. They are just given to him to add to his workload. 

But there's no use, it needs to be done.

So, Isak pushes his thoughts and feelings away once again and hurries to the bathroom downstairs to get it nice and clean. After that, it's checking the supplies and making a shopping list for tomorrow, cleaning the kitchen and the dinning room and then, lastly it's the living room.

However, Isak doesn't get this far.

It starts in the hallway: he's stumbling over his own feet and only now realizes that the warning is blinking at an increased speed for a while now and the alarm sound has also started already, but Isak was so busy, he hasn't even heard it.

And now it's too late.

Isak tries to hold himself upright by propping himself against the wall, hoping that he will get to the next socket like this, but he knows it's a vain hope.

He sees Liv's face appear from the living room and then he hears her scream when he collapses to the floor, making quite some noise as metal crashes onto the parquet. Then everything is dark.

The next thing Isak sees is Sonja's face directly above him.

She looks furious.

It takes him quite a while to focus his sight and his hearing, to finish booting up his system and to realize what has happened: he had shut down in the middle of the hallway, falling down on the hard floor and now Sonja had plugged him in. He could clearly see the charging sign in the corner of his eyes.

"What the fuck, robot?" Is the first thing he can hear Sonja say, or rather scream at him. "You can't be serious! Breaking down in the hallway like that! You're an embarrassment and you're useless, Adrian 2121! You can't even take care of the simplest tasks!"

Isak sits up slowly, carefully before he starts to run a systemcheck. He also checks his body for any dents or ruptured cables. But it seems to be fine and the check also comes back clean. "I'm sorry, Sonja," he tells her, not giving two shits about protocol right now. "But this is what happens when you don't give me enough time to charge. I can't do all of this work with barely no energy. I need to rest and charge fully - that takes at least 10 hours. If you are unhappy about that, you can just return me to the store and see if they have a newer version that needs less time to charge."

"Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you! I'm not going to return you. You'll have to suffer like you made me suffer, you piece of trash!" Sonja smacks him before she storms off, fuming. 

***

Mikael isn't alone the next time he shows up, that much Even can tell as, from the other end of the apartment, he can hear hushed voices talking.

Although Even has no desire getting back to any kind of routine knowing Isak isn't part of it anymore, he's felt better the last couple of days so, ultimately, curiosity gets the best of him and he takes the decision to leave his bed and wander into the apartment. For a brief delirious second, he catches himself hoping for the other person talking with Mikael to be Isak, but his vain wishes vanish as soon as he steps into the living room and sees Yousef next to his best friend.

Immediately, the two young men stop talking and turn to face Even, Mikael looking particularly surprised but not displeased to see him out of bed. 

"What's going on here?" Even asks in a rough voice. 

It's not that he isn't happy to see Yousef, one of their oldest childhood friends, but he doesn't understand why Mikael would invite him now, of all moments. Especially since they don't exactly hang out together very often - not anymore. Even has the chance of seeing Mikael and Elias quite often, for they all work in the same industry, if not on the same project like it was the case lately. But Yousef has a different life, and so they barely manage to take the time to see each other more than twice a year. Which… Now that Even is meeting Yousef's kind and warm eyes is something they should fix, but now isn't the time. 

Why would Mikael take him here when Even can barely get up to make tea or make conversation? It doesn't make any sense. 

"Hi, Even. It's good to see you," Yousef greets him with a smile, and the worst part is, despite the pathetic state Even must be in, he looks like he's never meant anything more.

"Hm. Hi. I'm sorry for…" _For looking like a depressed zombie? For being useless and rude? For being me?_ "I didn't know you were coming," he adds instead, and gives Mikael a pointed look which his best friend shrugs off dismissively. 

"Huh, yeah, sorry about that," Yousef replies, and contrary to Mikael, it's obvious he actually feels bad about it. 

"But Yousef has something important to tell you," Mikael chims in. "Right, Yousef?" He then urges him to speak.

Now Even is more than intrigued.

"What?"

"Yeah, so… Mikael kind of told me what happened," he clarifies awkwardly, unsure of the way to approach the thing. 

"Mikael did _what_ ," Even snaps, glaring at his best friend. So Mikael is walking around telling people he fell in love with a robot? Fucking great!

"Just, wait and listen," Mikael groans.

Even doesn't feel like waiting and listening when his best friend is acting so reckless with _his_ life, but if he ever wants to find out what Yousef is doing here, he doesn't have any other choice, so he does, albeit reluctantly. 

"I'm not sure you know about it, because she's very secretive about her work and Elias probably has no idea what it all means anyway, but…" Even frowns, confused already. Who's 'she'? "Sana is working as one of the top scientific engineers at Valtersen Inc."

And… Even is officially lost. What does Sana have to do with anything? He likes Sana, and he cares about her to some extent but… Did Yousef really come all the way here to tell him about his wife's job? And what about Valtersen Inc.? It sounds familiar but he can't figure out how it's related to his situation.

"Not to be rude but… So what?" Even can't help but retort. He's starting to get a headache from all the nonsense and he's craving to lock himself inside his bedroom again.

"Even," Mikael sighs, as if Even is the one being difficult and not them the ones being overly confusing. "Valtersen Inc.? Rings a bell? It's the goddamn corporation that created and sold Isak."

 _Oh_. Of course. How did he forget about it? Probably because Sonja did all the work back then and he never cared enough to remember the name of the company.

"Sana… invented Isak?" Even asks in a small voice, the information slowly growing in his brain until he fully realizes its importance. It's good, right? It means he knows someone who can explain to him what happened the past few months, why Isak is the way he is - closer to a human than a robot, no matter what Sonja or people think of it, acting so different from the usual robots Even has met in the past. He made a mistake by believing Isak was capable of reciprocating his feelings, but it doesn't erase the fact Isak is… more, far more, than a simple machine.

"Not just her, but yeah, she worked on the last generation of robots. So on him, too," Yousef nods. "So… She can tell you if your theory is plausible or not. She can give you answers."

"My theory?"

"Yes? Isak having feelings?" Yousef clarifies, like it's a reasonable theory to support.

Once again, his gaze snaps back to Mikael. "We went over this. Isak doesn't have feelings. I made it all up!"

"That's what _Sonja_ says, but I don't care what she thinks, and I certainly don't trust her opinion," Mikael contests, raising his voice, too, the way he does when he wants to make a point and Even knows how impossible it is to stop him when it's the case. "Listen, I don't know Isak the way you do, I barely met the guy twice, but even I got lost and forgot he was a robot for a moment. So I think, if deep down in your heart, you _felt_ he loved you the same way you loved him, then that's what I'm going to believe in, and I won't let you give up on him. Let's ask Sana the truth."

And Even, well… How is he supposed to protest after such a convincing speech? Mikael has always been the first one to call him out when he got carried away with wild plans. If he isn't doing just that right now, maybe Even should take the opportunity Mikael and Yousef are giving him, maybe…

Maybe it's his chance to get Isak back. To fix his mistakes. _To save him_.

"Even, I… I can't make you any promises. I can't tell you Sana will give you the kind of answers you want to hear," Yousef speaks again softly. "And I don't have all the information either, Sana isn't supposed to share anything with me or anyone but… Something happened a few months ago. Something huge. Something huge enough to make Sana very, very mad and almost made her resign from her job. The only reason she's still working there is that some of them begged her, _literally_ begged her, to stay and to try to fix whatever they did wrong. So I think you should meet her and tell her everything that happened with Isak. She should be able to help you, okay? I spoke to her already. She's ready to meet you whenever you are."

And all of sudden, hope is blooming inside Even's chest again. There is a chance that whatever happened at Valtersen Inc. is related to Isak, and with Sana having all the potential answers, he's willing to take it. He can't stay hidden inside his flat forever. He can't stay passive and idle when Isak is somewhere, forced to deal with Sonja's wrath. And with people's ignorance.

If there is an explanation to all of it, Even wants to find it and use it to finally free Isak.

So he nods, and says, "take me to Sana."

***

A couple of days later, Elias and Bente are taking Sonja out for an afternoon in some spa, saying that she deserves to be pampered after everything she's been through. Isak wants to laugh about it but instead keeps quiet and waits for them to leave the house. Liv is spending the afternoon with a friend, so he'll be home alone.

As soon as he sees the big Mercedes drive off, he hurries to the living room and picks up the phone.

Just as usual, it doesn't take long for Eskild to pick up: "Hello? Who is-?"

Before he can finish, Isak interrupts him, his voice high-pitched and brittle. "Eskild? It's Isak… Can you please come here?"

"Baby robot!" Eskild exclaims. "Oh, thank God… I was starting to get worried. I didn't hear from you after our sex talk and I've heard that Even hasn't shown up to any of the post-production meetings… What is going on?"

Immediately, his own feelings are pushed aside and worry overflows Isak's brain. Even hasn't shown up to any meetings!

"I'm not… with Even," he whispers. "Sonja has… They broke up and Sonja made me go with her. Can you please come here? I need… I can't anymore, Eskild. I need to talk to someone and… and then you need to go check on Even, okay?"

"Okay, angel, calm down, yeah?" Eskild sounds like he's already getting dressed while they are talking. "Tell me where you are and I'll come immediately!"

Isak tells him the address of Elias' and Bente's house and then reluctantly hangs up.

Then, he proceeds to sit on the edge of an armchair from which he can overlook the driveway and thus, will notice Eskild's arrival immediately.

It takes his friend about 20 minutes.

Hastily, Isak runs to open the door and then throws himself at Eskild who worriedly takes him into his arms. While Eskild strokes his back, Isak starts sobbing into his friend's shirt, relieved that he can finally show and share his pain. He has been holding it all together for way too long now.

They stand in the doorway like this until Isak is able to calm himself down enough to lead Eskild inside. After preparing a cup of tea for the human, they sit down at the kitchen table and Isak tries to figure out how to put everything that has happened in the past weeks into words.

Eskild gives him all the time he needs, though. And when Isak eventually manages to talk, he listens without interrupting him. Isak has no words to say how grateful he is to call Eskild his friend and that he came to him without questions.

He's a true friend.

Once Isak has finished telling him everything, Eskild puts his hand on Isak's and squeezes it lightly. "I'm so sorry, baby robot," he whispers, his eyes looking teary as if he was suffering along with Isak. And knowing Eskild, he probably is. "I wish I could've done something… I'm glad you called me. Though, I'm not sure what I can do to help? Do you want me to kidnap you and bring you back to Even? I'm sure I could do that…"

Isak smiles, sadly. "No, I don't think we could pull that off… Also, I can't risk hurting Even more. But you have to go and check on him, okay? You have to make sure that he's okay and that he's taking his meds and that he's eating. Can you do that for me, Eskild?"

"Of course, Isak, I will do that tonight," Eskild promises and Isak slums back in his chair in relief. "But what about you? How can I help you?"

"Helping Even is all the help I need."

Eskild rolls his eyes at him at little, though with a smile. "That's very heroic and cheesy of you, baby robot. But you can't stay here like this… We have to get you out of here. And back to Even, too."

"No!" Isak objects, folding his arms. "I can't make it worse for him again. I want to be with him, yes. But I can't… It's my fault that he had an episode. It's all my fault… I don't want to hurt him even more than I already did."

For a while, they are quiet and Eskild looks at him with a frown on his face, clearly thinking about something.

Eventually, he sighs heavy. "Well, I think that's bullshit. But okay… I will talk to Even first and then we'll see what we're going to do next. In the meantime, I guess you'll have to be strong if you don't want to come with me."

Isak shrugs it off and then, he freezes when he hears car doors being slammed shut.

Quickly, he jumps from his chair and walks to the kitchen window and looks out. Sonja is walking up the steps to the front door.

"Fuck," Isak whispers, turning back around to Eskild. "This is not going to end well."

"What?" Eskild asks.

But it's already too late. The front door is being opened and Sonja's voice calls through the house, "I forgot my swimsuit, robot. Can you please go and get it for me? Adrian? Where is this fucker…"

The kitchen seems to be the first place that Sonja can think of because she appears in front of them within seconds.

For a moment, she stares at Eskild in surprise. And then her face morphs into an angry grimace. "What the fuck?" She whisper-shouts with held back anger. "What is this? Eskild, leave now! I don't know what the robot thought - but he's surely not allowed to have guests if he can't even finish his tasks."

Eskild looks from Sonja to Isak and back with insecurity. He clearly doesn't want to leave Isak with Sonja, but at the same time Sonja's words and her obvious, barely restrained anger are leaving an impression on him. If anyone knows how it feels to be the object of Sonja's anger, it's Isak. So he nods to Eskild, silently asking him to leave.

"Fine," Eskild sighs and throws a sympathetic glance at Isak. "Call me if you need anything, baby robot. Okay?"

"He doesn't need anything," Sonja screams and then pushes Eskild towards the door. "Just leave now!"

Isak follows Eskild with his eyes and then looks at his feet when he can't see him anymore; there's no way he will look at Sonja. Sonja who is waiting until she can hear the front door being closed before she turns towards Isak.

She comes closer, poking her index finger into his chest. "You. Just who do you think you are, huh? Inviting Eskild here, probably whining to him about me! You have no right, robot, none! This isn't your house, you'll never have a house. You're lucky enough that you're allowed to stay here!"

As always, every word is meant to hurt him, to make him feel bad, to break his will that he shouldn't even have. And, as always, it is working. Every word hits Isak right into the heart he doesn't have. Every word is making him feel worse. Every word gets him closer and closer to believe that Sonja is actually right.

But then, she says something that rips him apart completely.

"I have had enough of you and your audacity, robot! I can't deal with this anymore… We're going to Valtersen Inc. tomorrow. And I'll tell them to reboot you, robot."

Isak's head snaps up and he stares at Sonja, tears welling up in his eyes all over again.

Sonja's smile is sly and evil. "Yeah… you know what that means, don't you?" Isak does but he cannot fathom it. He is frozen, his world is ending all over again. "It means you will remember nothing. You won't remember that you fucked my ex-fiancé. You won't remember that you two played to be in love. You won't remember that you thought you had actual feelings and thoughts, that you had the audacity to think you were something like a human or at least a living thing. You're not, robot, you never will be. And you won't even remember Even. There will be no Isak anymore, only Adrian 2121."

This time, it's over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... please don't kill us now?
> 
> No matter what happens next, you will finally get to know everything about Isak. What do you think Sana is going to say to Even? Do you have theories? This is your last chance to figure it out!  
> Will Even be able to stop Sonja before it's too late? But how? He still doesn't know anything about what Isak is going through and where he is...
> 
> Feel free to yell at us in the comments, and see you next week <3


	15. det finnes ingen meg uten deg (there is no me without you)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even gets long-awaited answers to his questions.  
> Meanwhile, Isak has to make irreversible decisions for himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ready for the answers?

The Valtersen Inc's corporate headquarters and main research laboratory is located in Bjørvika district, near the Opera Oslo House. The building looks modern and brand new, with its immaculate white facade, dotted here and there with geometrically shaped glass windows, and at the top, in straight and majestic letters, reflecting the rays of the sun like a mirror, the sign proclaiming "Valtersen Inc".

Even has walked past it multiple times before, has admired the architecture, but he has never given much thought to what was hiding inside it. Now, everything feels different. When he looks at the tall building, he doesn't see the beauty of it: he only sees it as the place where Isak was born, the place that could bring him long-awaited answers but could also shatter his fragile hopes once and for all and put an end to his story with Isak.

After a long hour of bargaining, Even managed to convince Mikael to let him come alone - he has already taken so much of his best friend's time and patience; this part, Even needed to handle it on his own.

As promised, Yousef has called Sana to arrange a meeting. A couple of hours later, here he is, moving around in circles in front of the glass entrance of the building, smoking his third cigarettes in a row, far too aware that the moment he decides to walk inside, he will seal his fate, as well as Isak's - their future together. There are moments that define your life, and Even feels that this is one of the most important ones. Hence his grande hesitation and fear at taking the next step.

In the end, fate comes to him, in the person of Valtersen's Inc employee Christina Berg. The woman was actually waiting for him outside, a paper cup of coffee in her hand that ran cold a while ago as she was watching him struggling with his inner thoughts. 

"Even Bech Næsheim?" She asks although it looks like she has no doubt about his identity, finally taking mercy on him. She has a smile in the corner of her mouth, a nice reassurance that appeases Even a little after his whole body having tensed up at the sight of her walking to him wearing the usual scientist's or doctor's white coat - Even has too many bad memories related to it from past hospitalizations, his reaction is like a Pavlovian reflex for him.

"Yes, yes. Call me Even," he replies nervously. Why would he offer a stranger to call him by his name? He needs to calm down.

"Alright," she nods anyway. "I'm Christina Berg, Sana's research assistant. But you can call me Chris," she grins at him.

Even relaxes, just a little bit.

"Should we go in?" Chris suggests in a kind voice.

It's now or never after all. "Yeah, okay."

They walk together to the entrance, Chris handing him the cup of cold coffee so that he can throw his consumed cigarette butt into it, and then, without diverting her gaze from the sliding doors, throwing it deftly into a trash can right before they get inside. Her next moves are all perfectly coordinated, but never rushed, Even following easily behind her: she waves at the receptionist with her left hand while she uses the right one to show her badge and make them pass through the security gate without faltering their pace; she winks at the security agent then proceeds to ask another colleague in a white coat how his daughter's doing since her appendicitis' surgery; as they are waiting for the elevator, she asks Even if he wants coffee, and by the time they step inside and then walk out of it, someone is bringing Even a fresh cup of steaming coffee.

"So, here's the lab," Chris announces, sounding proud. "Oh! Before I forget: you're one of Sana's colleagues, okay?"

Even nods in understanding. Yousef mentioned how Sana isn't allowed to share details on her research with her own husband, so surely Even's presence here isn't exactly protocol. To cover Sana, Even can be a scientist for a few hours.

"Want a quick visit?" Chris offers, always smiling, and not acting like they are doing something they shouldn't be doing in the first place. It makes Even wonder how bad did the company fuck up for them to have begged Sana to help them, and then secured her comfortable liberties, including inviting him an outsider to their laboratory, with all the risks it entails.

And once again, Even wonders to what extent Isak is related to all of it.

Chris doesn't wait for a proper answer before leading him further into the huge space. Smaller areas are delimited by glass walls, meeting rooms with boards covered with equations or diagrams, open spaces where colleagues are sharing large desks and are typing on their computers at high speed, rooms with screens everywhere and machines Even has never seen in his life. Then, Chris takes him to a much bigger area, and Even's breath catches in his throat. 

Right in front of him, there are dozens of human-like robots, with a few scientists working around them, taping on their tablets, seemingly running tests. Some of the robots aren't moving at all, waiting for instructions, but a couple are talking and moving around the room, looking as real and alive as the humans beside them, the only obvious difference with them being the absence of white coats.

"Are they... " Even starts but doesn't finish. He doesn't even know what he wants to ask exactly. He's seen many robots in his life, but none were anything like Isak, and he needs to know why. He needs to know if anyone here is holding the truth.

"They are not like Isak," Chris tells him, as if she's reading his mind. 

Even frowns, his gaze travelling from her to the robots and then back at her. "What do you mean?"

She smiles but doesn't answer.

"Even," someone calls behind him, the voice sounding somewhat familiar. He turns around to see Sana, smirking at him, looking particularly intimidating in her white coat, but still welcoming, with her soft eyes studying him. "I'm happy to see you. I'm sorry for the wait, I'm just getting out of a meeting. We can talk in my office." She thanks Chris, and then she's gesturing for Even to follow her.

They leave the robots and the other researchers behind as Sana leads him to a closed office, with blinds covering the glass windows, hiding what's inside from the outside world. On the door, a tag states the occupant of the office: "Dr. Sana Bakkoush Acar". Sana unlocks her office and steps aside to let Even in.

Sana's desk is right in the middle of the room, clean and tidy, just like Even would have imagined it to be. There is a computer, files on top of each other, a cup of unfinished tea and a couple of pictures - when Even takes a fleeting look, he recognizes a wedding picture of Sana and Yousef, and a Bakkoush family picture. On the back wall, glass windows are overlooking the Oslo Opera House and the Oslofjord, letting the sunshine inside the room. Finally, against the other walls with blinds, shelves are filled with books and reports. 

"Take a seat," Sana invites him, pointing at the seat right in front of her desk, while she walks around and sits in her own chair. She looks so confident, like she owns the place (which she probably does, in a way), that Even feels strangely nervous in front of her. Sana must have felt it because she smiles at him gently, and says in a soft voice, "you don't have to sit if you would rather stand up, though, don't worry."

This is what puts Even into motion and snaps him out of his awkwardness. He didn't come here to act small and shy, he came here to get answers, to do whatever is necessary to find out what's going on with Isak, and most importantly, to find a way to save him from Sonja - and the rest of the world if he has to. There is no place for him to be paralyzed in front of his friend's wife, of all people. Surely, Sana invited him to help him, not to make him feel worse.

So he gets rid of yet another untouched coffee and sits in front of Sana, looking her right in the eye.

"So… How much do you know about the… situation?" Even asks, still feeling completely out of place - but he fights back, and doesn't shy away from it.

"More than enough," Sana replies simply. Her smile is gone but her words aren't harsh. It's silent for a while, and Even wonders if he should go for it and just ask as many questions as possible, if this is what Sana is waiting for, but then he hears her sigh. "Let's start from the beginning, I guess," she says, and reaches out for something while she speaks. It ends up being an old newspaper that she puts in front of Even.

"They are the founders of the company, Terje and Marianne Valtersen. But you might have seen them before, especially Terje. Lately, he's spending more time doing conferences and talking on TV sets than showing up here," she explains, a hint of judgment in her voice. 

Even watches the old picture carefully: there is a tall man with dark blonde hair and a beard, when he smiles, he has creases at the corners of his eyes. He has an arm wrapped around the young woman next to him, smaller but just as confident, with a warm smile and sparkling eyes. Even studies the woman's face a little longer, her thin mouth, her turned-up nose, even her eyebrows, her features giving him a sense of familiarity that he doesn't understand. 

"Originally, Terje was an engineer and Marianne has been a surgeon for years before turning to research. She worked for years on transhumanism."

"Transhumanism?" Even repeats.

"It's a movement that advocates for the transformation of the human condition," she clarifies, "by developing and making widely available sophisticated technologies to enhance human intellect and physiology."

"Oh. So… Turning humans into robots?"

It makes Sana chuckle. "I guess it's one way to see it. But they don't stop being humans - not biologically speaking, at least. They are more like… Improved humans."

"Okay," Even nods. "That's not what's happening here, though."

"No, you're right. Marianne only worked on the subject a few years before she took an unexpected turn. She… She distanced herself from medicine even more to get closer to her husband's field: Artificial Intelligence."

"What does it mean?"

"It's a term used to describe machines that mimic cognitive functions that humans associate with the human mind, such as "learning" and "problem-solving". Computers. Robots. Androids - like Isak, humanoid robots that look exactly like humans." Sana waits for Even to nod again, then she stands up, walking to the closest window to look outside. "It's nothing new," she points out. "But what Valtersen Inc managed to do over the years… It definitely surpassed everything that has ever been made before. It went far further than programming robots to do specific tasks as an automatism. We… We taught robots to learn how to learn by themselves, instead of learning specific facts and tasks taught by humans themselves."

"I don't understand," Even whispers. His heart is beating fast inside his chest. What he means is, he doesn't understand what it means for Isak. He wants to know what it all means for Isak, he doesn't need anything else.

Thankfully, Sana is nowhere near done.

"Something went wrong with the selling process of the last generation of robots," she confesses, turning away from the window to sit back down at her desk. Her face is closed, her jaws clenched together. She looks angry. "But I didn't know about it until too late. He… Went behind my back."

"He?"

"Do you know what a design of experiments is, Even?" Sana asks instead, ignoring his question. It sounds more rhetorical than anything else, because surely she knows he has no idea what she's talking about. "In research, such as in medicine, when you want to conduct an experiment to judge the effectiveness of a treatment, you conduct an experiment with a treatment group and a control group. The treatment group is the group of individuals who get the new treatment. The control group is the group of individuals who don't receive anything, but they are used to compare their results to the results of the treatment group. That way you can know how people were supposed to evolve, to change - or not - without the treatment. But for the comparison to be right and relevant, both individuals in the two groups need to be alike. If you take very different people between the two groups then it makes no sense to compare them, right?"

Even is almost leaning over the desk, listening to Sana's words very carefully. So far, he gets the general idea.

"I need you to know I did not agree to any of it," Sana says, and she sounds almost desperate, which is highly surprising coming from her. It makes Even worry all over again.

"Sana, what happened?"

"Terje fucking Valtersen happened," she mutters.

"What does it mean?"

She takes a deep breath, putting her anger to the side so she can resume her explanations. "We wanted to make robots as close to humans as possible. It was Marianne's dream. We wanted to teach robots how to learn to feel, and not just imitate. We never thought we would succeed. But… We found a new powerful algorithm, we created this new technology and the results were _so_ promising..."

Sana grabs a file and opens it in front of Even. The first pages are filled with pictures and close-ups on different body parts; all of them, he guesses, belong to humanoids.

"We tried to recreate every aspect of a human being. The physical appearance was the easiest part. Science and technology made huge improvements. We've known for years how to reproduce artificially every single detail, every human feature, with the highest precision. They look just like us now. More than that, they feel, they sound and they taste like us."

Even blushes when he thinks about everything he knows about Isak's body, how he knows it better than his own: the tiny hairs on his thighs where Even likes to touch him, the taste of his tears as Even kisses them away, the blush on his cheeks when Even calls him "baby" or "beautiful", his body curling around him perfectly when they make love, the sounds coming out of his mouth as Even makes him part his lips for him, tongues meeting.

Sana is right. Although, to be honest, Isak isn't just like any other human being for him. He looks, feels, sounds, and tastes so much better. But it has probably more to do with Even being in love than any scientific or technological fact, so he keeps it to himself.

Sana turns a few pages; Even sees charts and numbers, but he has no idea what any of the data means.

"Then, there is their nervous system. For years, our robots have had a normal body response to contact, but it's always been neutral because it didn't have anything to do with feelings. It was just a way for them to react if a human touched them to get their attention, for example. But we wanted more for them. And we realized, what we really needed to recreate, above everything else, is the human brain. That's where everything happens: sensations, thoughts, dreams, feelings."

Sana shows him another page, with a drawing this time: multiple rows of circles, with every circle of a row being linked to another circle from a different row by an arrow. It doesn't make it any less confusing for Even, though.

"This is a schema of an Artificial Neural Network," she explains. "It's supposed to imitate a human Neural Network - a human's brain. It's a very complicated algorithm, and it's actually nothing new, but no one was capable of using it at its full potential. No one still can. But at Valtersen Inc, we managed to find new ways to use it to give robots the ability to learn by themselves, over and over again, and develop the ability to have feelings - or at least, it was our goal. And if you have feelings, then you can experience pleasure, or pain, let it be physical or emotional."

"Wait, what," Even stutters, overwhelmed by all this new information. "You're telling me you managed to give robots emotions and feelings? Am I understanding it well?"

"We didn't give them anything, that's the thing, Even," Sana corrects him. "We gave them the basics to learn how to feel, it's different. It's called Deep Learning. They… They actually act like humans. Like children learning over the years. When you were a child, your parents taught you how to speak, how to behave - social norms, good and bad. Then, you went to school to learn even more, right? You learned what it feels like to hurt someone and feel guilty about it. You learned what it feels like to fall in love but also what it feels like to get your heart broken. You learned to put names to feelings: joy, sadness, excitement, shame. Nothing comes all at once. We all learned those things over time. And so do our robots." Sana pauses and looks at him, seemingly waiting for him to intervene, but Even doesn't find any words, not a single one. She keeps on going. "The problem was, the only way for us to make sure we had AIs capable of developing their own way of thinking, of making their own decision, and most important, of having feelings of their own, was to let them live like humans. To let them learn from other humans. To let them be humans, around humans who weren't scientists, and see what happens. But we didn't know how to make it happen..."

Even stops breathing for long seconds, speechless. As the information is slowly sinking in, he realizes how much bigger it is than what he expected. He's no expert, but even he can see the implications are far more important and critical than his search for answers regarding his relationship with Isak.

Isak. Isak was one of them, right? It was the only explanation as to why Isak has changed so much, to why he went from acting like any other robot to behaving like a regular human being, having hopes and dreams, and goddamn feelings!

It hits him hard.

"So you fucking sold them?!" Even hears himself yell, his emotions making him lose his temper as the gravity of what Sana is telling him unfolds in front of him. They created robots with feelings and then just sold them? How could they?!

"I didn't! Terje did!" Sana defends herself. "He wanted more tests, more certitudes. I kept telling him we needed to be careful, we couldn't do whatever we wanted. If we really did create robots with feelings, it implied lots of ethical issues. I wanted officials and the government to know. But Terje didn't listen. He said we needed to keep hiding our researches within the usual selling business of Valtersen Inc. It became a mess. We were only a small team of researchers on it but it would start to spread if we kept fighting over it. Even Marianne was on my side. All the progress we've made, she thought it was a mistake, that it went too far. She actually wanted to stop everything."

"But Terje didn't let that happen, right?"

Sana sighs, shaking her head slowly. "No. I resigned out of anger and didn't hear from them in weeks. Then, next thing I know, they are selling a brand new generation of robots on the market. So I showed up at Valtersen Inc, asking to talk to Terje. Of course, I don't get to, the coward is avoiding me. Marianne comes to me though, and she explains to me what happened while I was away: he sent her away for a while and against her will, Terje decided to conduct his own little experiment. He organized the sale of their usual robots, except some of them had the new technology."

Sana's hand moves again, taking out another piece of paper. This time, it's a photograph.

Even's whole body freezes at the sight, his throat tight, his vision blurry with emotions. 

It's a picture of Isak. His Isak. In the very same laboratory Even was looking at scientists practicing tests on other robots earlier.

And so, he knows what she's about to say, but it's still a tremendous shock when he hears her speak, "Isak is one of them."

"Isak," is the only word coming out of his mouth. The only word coming to his mind.

"Terje was planning to let them stay with their owners between 6 months and 12 months... and then check how they evolved."

Isak is one of them. Isak has feelings. Everything was real, everything!

"Even," Sana calls, bringing him back to the present. He blinks at her sheepishly. "Are you okay? Is it too much all at once?"

Even looks down at Isak's picture again and he's taken aback at how different he looks, in a certain way. Physically, he didn't change much - for obvious reasons. But there is something about the way he's standing, and even more, the gleam in his eyes, blank and focused, that makes him a completely different person to him.

But the thing is, he's seen this version of Isak before. He looks like the Isak Sonja and he first brought back to their home, calling himself "Adrian 2121" and only acting by his "protocol" and his "programming". 

This Isak is long gone now. It was Isak before Even happened, before Isak had learned and grown up, by Even's side, around other people, but also, so much on his own.

Isak before they fell in love.

 _It was real_.

"It's fine, I'm okay," Even replies, although his shaky voice betrays him. 

Thankfully, Sana is kind enough to ignore it. "Okay… Then I need to ask you a few questions about Isak, if you don't mind?" Even nods carefully. "How was it when you two first met?"

"He was…" _Beautiful but empty?_ "Acting like any other robot, I guess."

Sana gets a notepad and writes something down. "What about lately? Last time you saw him, how was he?"

Even can barely think about it without his breath running short and his vision getting blurry from tears, but he forces himself to answer, "he was… upset."

"Upset? How so?"

Even lets out a deep, pained sigh, while staring at his own hands, resting on his lap. "He was crying. Because Sonja was taking him away from me. And I let her without putting on a fight. Without looking at him one last time."

Sana drops her pen and it makes Even look up in surprise. She picks it up right away but the confusion is clear on her face. "Sorry," she whispers and takes a few more notes, a crease between her eyebrows. "What kind of relationship did you two have? For him to be… upset, at the prospect of getting separated? Why did he care so much about staying with you, more than with Sonja?"

Even shifts on his seat, slightly embarrassed. He thought she knew already, but apparently, Yousef didn't tell her much - always the respectful friend, isn't it?

But then, Even decides there is no place in his heart for shame. Not anymore. He's spent his whole life feeling sorry on people's behalf because of his own brain, for being a burden, and it wasn't even his fault in the first place. So he wasn't about to treat Isak, the best person he knew, the best thing in his life, like a dirty little secret. He loves him and it seems like Isak loved him back, and Even won't try to hide it.

So he says in a confident tone, "we were in a relationship. A romantic relationship. I was leaving Sonja for him, but then she got into my head and… It doesn't matter anymore."

When he looks up at Sana, she's staring right back at him but her face is unreadable. "So… You didn't think of or see Isak as a robot anymore? He didn't 'act like any other robot' no more?"

"Isak is the most human person I know," Even states without any hesitation. "I know it's not true biologically but… I don't see the difference. I don't _feel_ it. If you met him, and you didn't know about his origin, then you wouldn't notice anything. He would be like any other _human being_ for you. Or I guess…. A very cool, kind, and smart human being, so maybe even better than the regular human."

It makes Sana smile knowingly at him, and Even feels himself blush. He's so obviously and openly in love, it's ridiculous. He can't stop himself from ranting about Isak.

"Maybe I should meet him soon, then," Sana suggests eventually. 

"What?"

"Would you mind taking him here, so I can meet him? Speak with him?"

For now, Even doesn't see how he could take Isak anywhere, but Sana seems so casual about it, so certain that there still is an _Even and Isak_ , that Even ends up nodding at her.

"Now, if you have questions for-"

Sana is interrupted by the ringtone of Even's phone. 

Even apologizes and pulls out his phone, ready to reject the call, but then he sees Eskild's name on the display and he pauses. He has a weird feeling about it.

He picks up the phone.

"Eskild?"

"Oh my God, Even! You need to come, _now_!" Eskild yells into the phone, panicked. Where does he need to come? Is there some kind of emergency at work? But then, why would Eskild be the one calling him?

"What? Eskild, what's wrong?!"

"It's Isak. He called me, so I came, and it's bad, Even, so bad!"

Even's heart skips a beat. Or ten.

"Sonja caught us and now she's losing it. She kicked me out but I heard her: she wants to reboot Isak! You need to come and get him, _now_!"

Even is standing up before even consciously making the decision. He holds the phone tightly in his hands, his other hand squeezing into an angry fist.

He knows for a fact that he's never felt the kind of rage he is feeling right now.

"Eskild. Tell me where the fuck she is."

***

"I won't come with you."

Isak's voice sounds strained because he has to fight against his programming. But this time he won't let that stop him. And why should he? If he goes with Sonja, he will lose everything anyway. This, this right here, is his last and only chance to keep his… he doesn't quite know what, _his personality_ maybe, and his memories. He has nothing to lose anymore, so his goddamn programming will have to shut the fuck up for a second.

He has to set himself free from her.

It doesn't matter if Even doesn't love him back, it doesn't matter that he probably can't go back to Even.

The only thing that does matter, is that he wants to keep being Isak. He doesn't want to go back to being Adrian 2121. He wants to be Isak, with everything that entails. The good and the bad. The beautiful memories and the hurt they bring because they're nothing more than memories of moments that will never come back to him. Tainted memories - because they weren't even real, not for Even at least.

Isak shakes his head as if to shake off the thoughts. He doesn't have time for this, not right now at least. He can wallow in self-pity later, now he has to take care of Sonja first or he will have no memories left to cry over.

Quickly, he focuses on Sonja again - she's fuming, pacing up and down the room in front of him with an angry, red face. It takes a second until Isak is able to understand the angry rant coming from her. "... fucking done with your bullshit. You're a robot and you belong to me. You'll do what I fucking tell you to do! You know, I could just as well throw you away on a junk yard with other useless metals like old cars and computers. That's where you belong, really, as you're just as useless."

"I'd rather you throw me away than reboot me," Isak interrupts her tirade. "I'd rather be dead than go back to being Adrian 2121 and let you use me."

Sonja stops in her tracks and stares at him, furious. "You can't be dead because you're not even alive, you piece of shit. And being used is what you were created for. It's all you will ever be, okay? A robot being used by humans for their needs. I need you to clean and go grocery shopping and all that shit, so that's what you do. Even needed someone to listen to his stupid shit, to treat him better than I apparently did, someone who touched him tenderly, hugged him and kissed him, someone to have a nice fuck with, so that's what you gave to him. He used you just as much as I do."

Isak has to swallow.

As much as he doesn't want to believe her words, they're still true somehow. At least in part, at least some of them. Yes, he isn't alive and yes, he was created to fulfill human needs and to take care of them. Yes, maybe even to be used by them like a modern slave because no one really cares about ethics and morals when it comes to robots - as, going back to Sonja's first point, they're not living things, they're not human. But thankfully, not everyone is like Sonja and her friends.

Even isn't like that, not one bit.

And that's why her last words simply aren't true. Maybe Even doesn't love him back, maybe it was just his sickness speaking. But that doesn't change the fact that Even is a kind person and that he cares about Isak. Even is more than his sickness, Isak has done enough research by now to know that his disorder only enhances his personality and doesn't change it completely.

So, that's that. Even is always Even, whether he is having an episode or not. So, Even will still be nice to him when he's feeling better. Even if he doesn't love him, even if that part wasn't true, their friendship will remain.

Meanwhile, Sonja will still be a condescending bitch.

"You don't know your finacé at all considering you've been together for years, do you?" Isak tries to stay calm while replying to her but it's really hard to fight both - his anger and his programming, so he isn't sure how well he's doing. "Even isn't anything like you. He's kind and compassionate and empathetic. So, while he doesn't reciprocate my feelings, he sure as hell has never used me in any way. It was give and take, it was something special no matter if he had an episode or not."

"What feelings, robot?" Sonja snaps back at him. "You don't have feelings. I don't know why you think you're something special or whatever. You're not. You're just another robot that people use. Maybe not Even because he's naive and too kind for his own good. But other people - _literally_ everyone else."

Isak sighs and fights her words off. He doesn't want to give her the power to hurt him with her words anymore. He knows she isn't right. Maybe he would've believed her words to be true a couple of weeks ago - but not anymore. He has spent enough time on research, on replaying his interactions with humans, on people's reactions to him, and on thinking and exploring his own thoughts and feelings to know that she isn't right.

Thus, her words have no power over him. Not anymore. And since she will probably get rid of him in one way or another, there's no reason to hold back anymore, to try to appease her in any way.

So, Isak straightens his shoulders and stands up tall before looking directly at Sonja to show her that she can't hurt him anymore.

"But I do. I have feelings. And you know very well that I do, Sonja. You saw me cry, you _made_ me cry. You hurt me, physically and mentally. You showed me more than once how shitty humans can be. You were the one who made me want to stop feeling things because I didn't want to have feelings if it entailed feeling like you made me feel when you hit me. But I realized that was stupid… Because feeling the way Even made me feel was worth all the bad things and so much more."

He bites his lips and looks at Sonja, waiting for her to call him names again but for once she stays quiet. So, Isak continues: "Look, I'm sorry for what Even and I did to you, for doing these things while you two were still a couple. I know that wasn't right… We shouldn't have done that. And I understand that you're angry at me for that. But just because you're angry at me, just because you're hurt… it doesn't mean that all of that will go away. I'm still in love with Even, he still cheated on you and I still have feelings. And you can go and take that away from me but it won't change anything for you. All of these things happened and you can't undo them, Even and I can't undo them. You will still be mad at me and at him and probably also at yourself. Even will still feel guilty about it."

Sonja is still quiet and Isak isn't sure what to think about it. Is she actually thinking about the things he said to her or is she just plotting her next verbal attack?

It's impossible to say with her.

"You know what? Maybe you're right - but I don't give a shit," she eventually snaps out of it and takes two steps towards Isak, poking her index finger into his chest. "Even if it's true and you have something similar to feelings… No, actually, especially if that's true, I'll get you rebooted! Because you're a fucking misconstruction. An error in the system. And it needs to be stopped."

Isak frowns at her, trying to process this new information and… "Is this what it's about then, really? It's not about Even and me, is it? You don't even care enough about him to want to take this kind of revenge on him and me… It goes deeper. It's about robots in general having feelings and thoughts and opinions, isn't it?"

Sonja's eyes are dark and cold and nothing but mean when she looks up at him. It's disgust that's written all over her. It makes Isak shiver and he is close to recoiling but he doesn't want to give that victory to her.

"Well… if you're nothing else, you're at least clever," Sonja spits. "Or well, you were made clever by someone who gave you some algorithms and an internet connection."

Isak shrugs and takes her finger away from his chest. "Thanks, I guess?! So… it's because you think feelings should be inclusively reserved for humans, is that it? No non-living-being should have feelings."

"It's just not right," Sonja endorses, still glaring at him as if all of this is his fault. As if he had a choice in how he was created. "Robots having feelings. It's not right. I see babies being born every day, I see them take their first breaths, I see their parents filled with happiness and joy. I still remember the first time I had a crush on someone or the first time I kissed Even or how I felt when my grandma died. You don't have any of that. You were created, you are just some cables and electronics and programming. You have no mother that is happy and proud to have given life to you. You haven't lived through any of the things any humans have through. You haven't spent years and years exploring and learning about your feelings and what they mean and how to deal with them. How is it right that suddenly someone decides that you should have feelings and… just gives them to you? You're not human, you don't understand what it all means. No one taught you how to love, nothing showed you what loss means. It's not right."

For a while, they just look at each other in silence. Sonja with disgust and something else in her eyes that Isak can't identify while he thinks about her words and what they mean to him and to her.

He's pretty sure they mean different things for both of them.

For Sonja it means that somewhere someone has fucked up and that Isak has no right to have feelings. That it's a bad thing, that it's not right and that someone needs to put a stop to it as soon as possible.

For Isak, on the other hand, it's more of a miracle. Having feelings, learning about them, and discovering whole worlds inside of him. It also means Sonja is wrong about many of the things she assumes.

"But that's where you're wrong," he thus tells her. He's trying to pick his words carefully, scared that she will snap again if he says something wrong now. "I mean, yes, of course, I wasn't born and I didn't have years and years to learn and to explore. But it's not like I just woke up with feelings overnight. Someone did teach me how to love, someone did show me what it means to lose something that means the world to you."

Even though he chose his words carefully, it is too much for Sonja.

She grabs his arm and drags him towards the front door, screaming. "I really have enough of your bullshit, robot! I'm so done with all of this. We're going to Valtersen Inc right now and you will get that reboot and I will make sure that nothing of this will happen ever again."

But when she opens the front door, she lets out a surprised shriek and stops in her tracks, staring at whatever or whoever surprised her.

Isak moves a little to look past her and see what the fuss is about.

When he does, his heart stops.

 _Even_.

He looks furious, ready to kill, to be honest - or well, no, Even would never actually do something like that. But he's definitely ready to tell Sonja a piece of his mind. Isak has never seen him like this before. His kind eyes are on fire, his body is tense and he looks taller and stronger than usual, even though he looks like he has lost some weight at the same time.

He's Perseus coming to free Andromeda.

But really, Andromeda has already done that - at least mentally. But still… Isak smiles a little to himself at the thought.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Even half-shouts once he stops in front of Sonja; and it's only now that Isak sees Eskild approaching behind Even. He looks more worried than angry, his eyes fixed on Isak instead of Sonja. When their gazes meet, Eskild shoots him a questioning look and Isak half-smiles, half-shrugs.

Then, they both turn towards Even and Sonja.

Even's eyes quickly scan Isak as if to check that he's okay, physically at least, before he looks back at Sonja without meeting his eyes. Isak understands but he still wishes it were different.

Sonja glares back at Even, hate in her eyes. "I'm doing what I think is best. And right. And I won't let you stop me. You're the one who ruined our engagement, so there's really nothing you can say, Even. You have no right to tell me what to do. And this robot is an abomination, really. It has to stop."

"I am the one who ruined our engagement?" Even shakes his head and huffs. "Sonja, our relationship was ruined before we even thought about getting engaged. Yet, we stayed together because we both were too scared to start over. Maybe because we once had hope to get back what we used to have when we were young. But you surely can't act like this is all my fault. I've been feeling guilty for things that aren't my fault for too long."

"I…" Sonja suddenly stops, looking around to the neighboring houses, and then sighs. "I think we should go inside. This is nothing to discuss outside where anyone could listen."

Isak can actually feel Even tensing up even further. But eventually, he nods anyway. "Of course, you'd say that. But fine, whatever… I don't mind. Let's go inside and talk there. But I'm not letting Isak out of my sight."

While Isak's breath hitches, Sonja rolls her eyes but agrees. She lets Even into the house and closes the door before Eskild can follow them. Isak feels sorry for him as he hears him complain outside. But he can't give more thought to it because Even and Sonja are already walking towards the living room.

Isak follows them, closing the door behind him and leaning against it to watch his owners standing in front of each other in the middle of the room. Neither one of them sitting down, unwilling to give even the slightest impression of weakness.

It's Sonja who speaks first: "So, you want to say that it's my fault, huh? That it's my fault that we broke up? When you're the one who slept with the fucking robot? And I mean… it's not like this is your first escapade or something… I still remember when we were 19 and you slept with like five people in a week. And yet, I forgave you. I forgave you for everything you did to me, Even."

"Are you fucking serious? We talked this out right away and you said, you're willing to move on from it. And that's what we did. Or at least I thought, we did. And now you're holding it against me like this all over again?," Even retorts, his voice heavy with held back anger and yet, there's also guilt in his voice. As if something, somewhere deep inside of him, still agrees with her and feels guilty for it. Isak wishes he could hug him right now. "But of course you would. You say things but you never mean them, Sonja. You hold my sickness against me every chance you get. But it's not my fault that I'm sick. I wish I wasn't, God, do I wish that, you know it better than anyone else. But I am and we've talked about this enough times and you promised me once that you'd never hold it against me. Yet, it is all you've been doing for years now."

"Is that so? I've just been trying to help you, Even… But you always see me as the enemy, as someone who's controlling, patronizing you. I can't even tell you to not drink too much or that you should stop smoking because it is _bad_ for you without you throwing a fit."

Isak looks from Sonja to Even and back as they fight. He had no idea that there was so much going on between them already before he had arrived, that their relationship had been in such a sorry state _for years_.

And yet, Sonja had the audacity to blame it all on him?

Wow, just wow.

"That's what you think, right?" Even barks. He's getting angry all over again and Isak really can't blame him. "That you're just trying to help me? That you're the good Samaritan saving me from myself? Well, sorry, to burst your bubble, Sonja, but you're not. And I don't need to be fucking saved either. I need someone who supports me and stands by me and loves me, not someone who thinks they're saving me by patronizing and controlling me."

Sonja crosses her arms in front of her chest - it's probably not meant to seem that way but to Isak it looks almost vulnerable. "Well, it's not my fault that you think anyone who wants to help you is controlling you."

"I don't think that, Sonja. It's just that… what you did wasn't helping me at all. Or do you really think telling your friends that I was at home with a cold when I was actually just too depressed to get out of bed was helping me? How was making me feel like a worthless piece of shit going to help me? Sonja, nothing you did for years now was to help me… It was merely to keep up the image of a working relationship in front of your friends and your parents. All you've been caring about is appearances and what people might think if they find out what's really going on with me. How many of your friends actually know that I'm bipolar, huh?" 

Sonja stays quiet, not answering his question and Isak takes that to mean that none of her friends know about Even's disorder. And yeah, Isak cannot imagine Sonja telling Bente about Even being sick at all.

"What does it matter anyway?" Sonja eventually screams. "It's not like you ever cared about my friends! You hate all of them and you never behave appropriately when we're going out with them! You're being an ass usually, ruining everyone's night. So, don't blame me for not giving them even more reasons to dislike you and telling me to break up with you."

Suddenly, Even laughs and Isak is confused for a moment. But when he looks at him, he realizes it's sarcasm.

"Really? You're playing the "hating your friends" card? You? You're the one who's treating my friends like shit, avoiding them like the plague. How often have you actually met Mikael, huh? You know… my best friend? Was it three times or maybe four?"

"Your friends hate me, don't blame me for not wanting to meet them!" Sonja retorts, rolling her eyes. "I don't know what you've been telling them about me but it's obvious that they all hated me before they even met me…"

They go back to silently glaring at each other for a while after that and Isak feels weirdly intrusive, even though he's just standing there, squatting against the door, almost invisible to both Sonja and Even as they're both too busy throwing everything they've been holding in for the last years at each other. It's not really his place to listen to all of this, it's none of his business and it also makes him even angrier at Sonja.

But then Even's eyes wander and their gazes meet for a second before Even quickly looks away again. Isak isn't sure what to make of it but before he can mull over it, Sonja speaks again, clearly also having noticed their short interaction. "Anyways, this is not about your stupid friends. This is about the robot!"

Immediately, Isak tries to make himself smaller.

Maybe the past weeks have done more damage to him than he has previously thought, maybe Sonja has actually scarred him for life.

"Not really. It's more about what you want to do to Isak," Even replies, digging his fingernails into his palms to suppress his anger. "You have no right to do this, Sonja. You can't do that to him."

Sonja shakes her head. "Actually, I think I have the obligation to do this. Because you know - not everything is about you. I just simply think a robot like him shouldn't exist. It's not right for a robot to think of its own, to have feelings… Where will it end, Even? Do you even think about that or do you only care about your sick little game?"

"Can you stop being a bitch for once? You might not like the fact that Isak is how he is because it means you can't use him like a modern day slave anymore, but nothing of this is about you, Sonja."

"Yeah, _I_ know that it isn't about me, that it's much bigger than me," Sonja snorts before looking Even dead in the eye. "You're the one who doesn't realize that this is bigger than you, than us, than your robot. Actually, he shouldn't be just rebooted. I should make the government aware of this. He surely isn't the only one and this fucking company needs to be stopped before something worse than this happens."

"Something worse? Sonja, you know Isak, look at him. He isn't a threat to anyone. He could never hurt anyone. He has more humanity and compassion in him than I ever saw in any human ever."

"Maybe not him," Sonja indulges him, now using her crossed arms to hug herself. Isak frowns a little at her gestures. It looks a bit like she's starting to cave in and that's really something he wouldn't expect of her. "But what about the other ones, huh? You can't tell me he's the only one they… experimented on. Or whatever it is they're doing there. How can you just let this happen, huh? I always thought you were the idealist in this relationship. But apparently only when it doesn't touch you…"

Even sighs heavily and then sits down on the sofa unexpectedly. Isak doesn't understand why, but apparently their fight is over. Or well, not over-over, but they've definitely calmed down and are almost talking to each other like adults who loved each other once.

Almost...

"You know, unlike you, I've actually done some research and talked to someone at the company and know my shit before I just go around, threatening to hurt people and to take away everything from them."

"People? What people? He's still a robot, Even. And he will always be that."

Even looks at her and sighs, clearly resigning. Isak understands. Even if Even likes to believe otherwise, Sonja is still right. Isak is a robot, not a person and that he has feelings won't change that either. There's no reason to fight her on that, it's the truth and it will always be the truth.

"You know…" It's Sonja who speaks again and Isak is scared of what's going to come out of her mouth next. "I'm so done with this shit. And I'm so done with you, too. It doesn't matter who fucked this relationship up, whether it was me or you or both of us… We're over and I'm done letting my parents pressure me into staying with you, just because they think a shitty partner is better than none. Fuck them, they think I'm a failure anyway," she suddenly looks up, staring at Even as if she forgot that he was there for a moment. "And fuck you, too. Take your fucking robot and get out of my sight!"

Isak gasps and he can't help it when his eyes are starting to tear up again. The past weeks have been too hard on him to not shed a tear at the thought of them being over.

"Wow, Sonja…" Even is getting up from the sofa and walking towards Sonja, stopping right in front of her. "Fuck you too then, I guess… And he's not my robot and I won't take him anywhere." Wait - what?? No, no, no, he has to take him with him! "You know, Isak has his own mind and he can make his own decision. So, if he doesn't want to come with me, I'm not forcing him. Because you know… I'm not a pathetic bitch like you."

Oh… a small smile appears on Isak's lips when he realizes that Even doesn't mean that he won't actually take him home. It just means that Even is giving him a choice and that is such an Even-like thing to do that Isak wants to kiss him. But he doesn't, he can't. And even if he doesn't actually have a choice, because saying no to Even means staying with Sonja and that isn't an option, he still would choose to go with Even anytime.

"I wanna go with you," he whispers in a small voice, smiling at Even who's looking at him but still avoiding his eyes.

Even nods and they leave, running into Eskild who's pacing back and forth in front of the house worriedly. Immediately, he gives Isak a big hug and places at least five kisses on his hair and his forehead, before he drives them home.

*

The drive home was awkward and no one talked, Isak and Even because they were too preoccupied with their own thoughts and Eskild because he didn't know what to say. Once they arrived, Isak sent Eskild off with another hug and a promise to call him tomorrow morning at the latest.

Isak is more than happy to be away from Sonja - and even more so to be back with Even, where he is safe, where he can be himself, where no one will hurt him in any way. But he's also a little bit anxious about how he should act around Even with everything that has happened between them.

It will probably be awkward, right?

His heart will shatter when he'll hear Even say what Sonja has already told him. And then what?

He doesn't even want to think about it.

But once he sits on the armchair across from Even, he knows there's no going back. They will have to talk now and they will have to be honest with each other, leaving nothing out of their talk. They have to clear everything up once and for all - he just witnessed what will become of them if they don't.

Isak clears his throat, lost on where to start the conversation. So, he looks at Even on the sofa. The human is playing with his fingers, probably wondering the same thing.

Eventually, Isak decides to rip the bandaid off and dive right in with the most painful question he can think of right now. "What happened when Sonja came home from her parents? What did she say to you? Why did you just let her take me away?"

It seems to take Even off guard, he probably didn't expect Isak to jump right in there. But there is no avoiding it and it is, after all, the question that has been haunting Isak for the past weeks, the question he shut down with every night and the first thing that came to his mind in the mornings while he was still booting up. He needs an answer to this question more than anything else.

When Even looks up and finally meets Isak's eyes, he looks vulnerable and hurt and just as anxious as Isak feels.

And maybe everything isn't as simple as Sonja made it seem.

"Do you know... " Even's voice is shaky and he has to take a deep breath before he starts over. "Do you know what the first thing was that Sonja said to me when I told her that I want to break up with her because I fell in love with you?" Isak shakes his head and looks at Even with what he hopes to be reassurance. "She asked me if I had taken my meds."

Isak nods slowly - of course that would be the first thing Sonja would ask. "But you did… I know you did. I saw you take them. So, I don't…"

_So, I don't understand why it wasn't real._

"Yeah, I know…" Even sighs, his eyes moving over Isak's face - but what he's hoping to find there and if he does, Isak doesn't know. But at least he's looking at him again. "We argued because she once again tried to convince me that you have no feelings, that you can't be in love with me and all that…"

Again, Isak nods because that's exactly the kind of reaction he expected from Sonja. But he doesn't understand how this led to Even letting him go. Because Even knows that's not true, he knows Isak has feelings and he knows Isak is in love with him. How did Sonja's words lead to Even realizing that he was in fact having an episode and that his own feelings were the ones that weren't real? And how did that then lead to Even thinking it was a good idea for Isak to go with Sonja? Because even if he doesn't love Isak, he must have known what it would mean for Isak.

He wants to interject, ask all these questions to Even but he finds himself to be dumbstruck and waiting for Even to continue.

And Even does.

"Eventually, she… She made me see what I did to you… or well, I'm not really sure anymore what is true and what isn't," Even whispers. He's not looking at Isak anymore, his eyes fixed on his hands. "But if that's what I did, then I'm sorry, Isak, okay? You have to believe me that I'm sorry. I never wanted this to happen. I just… I don't know, I guess I just wanted it so much that I didn't realize what I was doing to you, whether I was manic or not."

Isak frowns while trying to figure out what Even is saying. What does he mean? What could he have possibly done to him? Except for letting Sonja take him away, Isak really can't think of anything. "What are you talking about, Even?"

"About how I made you pretend to be in love with me. Or made you think you were in love with me. I don't know exactly but… I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to… And it's okay if you don't love me back, you know? You don't have to feel like you have to or something just because it's what I want… And especially not now, after I let you down."

"Wait what?" Isak almost screams because he's so confused about the things Even is telling him right now. Confused and maybe also enraged. Because is that really what Even thinks has been happening? How can he?

And if this is what Even thinks has been happening… Does it mean that what Sonja told Isak was wrong?

Because this sounds a lot like Even telling him that he loves him and that he is the one doubting _Isak's_ feelings for _him_. Which would mean that Sonja, that fucking bitch, has managed to manipulate them both into thinking their feelings weren't reciprocated.

"Even…" Isak stands up from the armchair and takes careful, uncertain steps towards the sofa until he can sit down next to Even. "Look, I don't know what Sonja told you exactly, but it's not true, okay? She was manipulating you, both of us actually."

Even looks up at him with teary eyes and before Isak can stop himself, he's already whipping away the first tears spilling over with his thumbs. "She made me think you were having an episode and that none of the things that happened between us were real."

"What… what are you saying?" Even whispers.

His insecurity is hurting Isak, really. Because for the first time he can actually see what Sonja has done to him in all these years; ruining his self-esteem and making him feel worthless, unlovable even when he's anything but.

Isak licks his lower lip while thinking about his next words. "You know you came in like Perseus saving Andromeda today?" He deflects instead because he doesn't quite know what to say yet. "For a second, I thought, you'd kill Sonja like Perseus slayed Cetus."

It at least gets a smile and a little chuckle out of Even, so it's a win. "Trust me, I thought the same for a moment."

"You know how I told you that Athena placed them both in the northern sky, next to each other, so they would be together forever?" Isak waits for Even to nod. "Is that… Would you want that for us, too? To be together forever?"

Even stops breathing for a second and then his breath comes out stuttering. "Isak, fuck… Do I want to be with you forever? Yes, of course. There is no me without you. But it's okay if that is not what you want, okay? We can be friends and… it will be fine. Don't worry. I will not do anything like… _that_ again if you don't want it."

"Say that again," Isak says, breathless himself now. Even frowns at him, unsure what he means, and starts with that he won't do anything Isak doesn't want. But Isak shakes his head and interjects: "No, what you said before that."

The air around them feels tense, like it's vibrating. Isak feels like he's tensing up, as well, and when their eyes meet again, something is different.

" _There's no me with you._ "

Isak swallows heavily and repeats. "There's no me without you."

For a while, they are both quiet. Then Isak picks up Even's hands and takes them into his, squeezing them a little. "You know… I had a fight with Sonja, too, earlier. And she told me a bit why she thinks that it's so wrong for robots to have feelings, why she thinks that I'm an abomination… And one of the reasons she gave, was that robots lacked the life experience that humans have. That I have not experienced different feelings throughout my childhood and that I didn't learn how to feel through lived experience and all that… That I had no mother that was proud and happy to give birth to me, that I hadn't experienced loss. And that no one taught me how to love."

Isak smiles, the memories of all his shared moments with Even replaying in his CPU in quick sequences. "But she has no idea how wrong she is. It's true that I didn't have the time humans had to learn about these things and that I haven't lived through years of exploring emotions and what they mean. But I did learn and I am still learning. I know what hurting means because Sonja hit me and it hurt. I know what wonder is because you showed me the starlit sky for the first time. I know what fear is because I've been afraid of Sonja and her friends for the past weeks. I know how loss feels because Sonja took me away from you. I know what happiness is because you made me happy every day."

He pauses and looks at Even.

Even who is looking back at him with big eyes and an open mouth.

"And I know what love is because you taught me how to love, Even Bech Næsheim. You didn't force anything on me! You made me fall in love with you, yes, but trust me, I fell very, very voluntarily. I don't regret it for one second. And I never will."

Isak sees how Even's eyes light up the minute he lets himself believe that Isak's words are true and it makes him feel light himself.

Before he knows it, they're hugging so tight that not even a piece of paper would fit in between them.

And they hug and they hug and maybe there are some tears along the way, too.

Eventually, Isak moves away a little to place a kiss on Even's forehead before pulling out of the hug. "I… you said that you were at Valtersen Inc. Is that… true?" Even affirms and Isak swallows. "Why? And what did they tell you?"

"Hmm… Why - well, because Mik eventually convinced me that I shouldn't trust Sonja's words and that I should go find out more about you. The wife of a friend of ours works there, so I could actually talk to someone I knew and knew would tell me the truth…"

Isak nods. "Okay… So, what did you find out there?"

Even tells him everything: about Sana, about Terje and Marianne Valtersen, about their goal to make robots as closely to humans as possible, about their research and all that (here it gets a bit fuzzy and inaccurate and Isak guesses it's probably because Even's technical knowledge is limited and he didn't manage to keep everything Sana explained to him), how they eventually managed to create this new line of robots that they thought might be a success, about how they couldn't be sure without leaving them in the company of humans for a while though and how they thus ended up selling them without anyone knowing.

"But nobody but Terje actually knew about it," Even continues. "Sana had quit her job over them fighting whether or not to do it, so she had no idea. When she found out that Terje had done it, despite everyone advising him not to, she flipped. Marianne eventually asked her to come back to fix the mess they made, even though she was pissed as fuck."

Isak nods and tries to piece it all together, to add the missing technical details to it and to figure out how it all comes down to him.

But he can't, not really, not quite… he needs…

"I need to meet Sana."

Even looks up at him, a little confused, but he nods. "Yeah, I think I could arrange that for you, I guess?"

"Please," Isak says. "I just… I need to piece it together, you know? I need all the details from her and… I need it to make sense. I need to understand where… where I come from?! I don't know."

"That is probably the most human thing you said yet," Even replies with a smile. "I will call Yousef tomorrow, okay? Then we can arrange a meeting."

Isak smiles. "Thank you. And I want to meet the Valtersens, too."

"Well… that I can't promise but I will tell Sana."

Again, Isak thanks him and then they sit in awkward silence for a while. Isak doesn't know what to say, Even probably feels the same. It will probably take them a while to readjust to each other and to learn how to act around each other again. A lot of things have happened between them and also in the meantime, while they were apart, and they have exchanged a lot of information that needs to be processed.

And while he really wants to, Isak doesn't think it is a good idea to kiss Even quite yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo, you know everything now (or, well, almost, next chapter will offer Isak more surprises too!). 
> 
> I (Fau aka fauu_stine) hope Sana's explanations weren't too much, too complicated, or too boring. Artifical Intelligence is my field, I'm working in it (among other things) and so I was really excited at the idea of using what I know to build something somewhat realistic for Isak's background and his identity. Everything Sana said is, to some extend, true, and plausible. Deep Learning/Artifical Neural Network is a real functioning technology, but like she said, so complexed, than as we speak data scientists can do little with it compared to the endless possibilities. So no, today, there is no algorithm powerful enough to allow robots to learn and grow feelings, but who knows in the future? And anyway, in this fic, in this parallel universe, scientists are more advanced and so it created Isak! Ta-dam!  
> I also hope you weren't disappointed by the final outcome. I know some of you had theories about Isak being a robot version of a real human Isak. But to be honest, it's something we've never considered. Early on, we fell in love with this robot version of Isak and there was no turning back. Even fell in love with this version, no matter his nature, and I think it's a very important part of the story. It wouldn't have felt right at all to give Even a new "flawless", human version of Isak to then get rid of his robot avatar. Isak is different from Even and humans in many ways, but different doesn't mean not good enough. I guess if this story has some kind of moral, it would be it. Embrace differences, learn instead of judging, and love each other as best as possible <3 (wow, I turned sappy, I should get back to my algorithms.) 
> 
> Anyway, tell us what you felt and what you thought of this chapter! 
> 
> We are getting closer and closer to the end: two more chapters + the epilogue. But before that, we need to solve a few more things! Next chapter will be in Isak POV only (and the one after that Even POV). Does it sound good? We hope you'll enjoy the end of the ride <3


	16. jeg prøver å lære meg hva kjærlighet er (I try to teach myself what love is)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak has several interesting conversations, learns more about his past, and gets an interesting offer. Meanwhile, Even's and his relationship rekindles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyho, you guys... I know you've waited for this and finally, I can give it to you! It was very time-consuming to write 8.5k on my own - I'm not used to it. ;-) But eventually, I managed and I hope you'll like them. <3  
> It's Isak time. He has a lot to discover in this chapter and he has to take some big steps without Even... let's see how he's doing... ;-)
> 
> Thank y'all so, so much for your constant support and your lovely comments. We already have over 700 kudos and we're still struggling to believe it, even when we can clearly see it. Thank you!!! We appreciate all of you a lot. <33

When Isak boots up the next morning, finally fully loaded again for the first time in a while, Even is not in bed anymore. Frowning, Isak gets up from the armchair he's been sitting on for the night - too insecure to crawl into bed with Even just yet - and walks out of the bedroom to look for him.

He finds him in the kitchen, a forgotten plate of pasta in front of him.

"You're eating pasta for breakfast now?" Isak asks before entering the kitchen. He moves around uncertain before he settles, leaning against the kitchen counter across from Even.

Even looks up at him in surprise, then he frowns and eventually, he chuckles. "Maybe you should check the time."

"Huh?" Confused, Isak checks the time and lets out a sound of surprise when he sees that it's already 12.30 pm. How the hell did this happen? "I'm sorry… I didn't mean to get up this late at all… I don't know what happened exactly."

"Isak…" Even gets up from his chair and walks over to Isak, stopping in front of him. They are, purposely, not touching but it's a close thing. He would only have to flex his fingers a little and he would be able to feel Even. "You don't have to apologize. You needed to rest and recharge."

With a sigh, Isak relaxes a little. He's not with Sonja anymore, Even will never judge or even punish him for something like this. He is safe now and he doesn't have to apologize for things like this anymore.

It's the strangest feeling… Is that what humans call freedom?

Carefully, Isak looks up at Even who is standing right in front of him still, his eyes moving over Isak worriedly. "It's okay, baby, it's okay," he suddenly whispers, one of his hands tracing over Isak's curls. "You don't have to worry about stuff like that anymore… You don't have to worry about her anymore."

And of course, Even sees right through him.

Isak can't hold himself back anymore and folds himself in a little until he can press his face against Even's chest, almost collapsing against him. Immediately, Even's arms are around him and he holds him against him, one hand stroking Isak's back now while he's murmuring soothing words into Isak's ear.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" Even cautiously asks, once Isak has resurfaced and is looking at him again. "I mean, you don't have to, of course. But maybe it will help?"

They sit down on the sofa in the living room. When Isak realizes how far apart they are, he scoots over until he's pressed to Even's side. Just because they are still kind of figuring things out, it doesn't mean he can't be close to him in the meantime. They have been apart for too long for him to miss any opportunity to be close to Even.

He takes a moment and a deep breath before he starts telling Even about his weeks with Sonja and Bente and her family. He doesn't go too much into detail - to spare Even or himself, he's not sure. Then, suddenly, a little smile appears on his lips. "Their daughter, though, she's sweet. I really liked Liv. She was like… my ray of sunshine, something to hold on to. I hope she's okay."

"I'm glad you at least had someone," Even whispers, taking Isak's hand into his. "Maybe we can call her or something… once everything has calmed down a little."

Isak sighs. "It would be really nice but we both know it's not going to happen. Bente will kill us or send the police after us, at least."

"Sorry," Even whispers and squeezes his hand. "Anyway, Eskild called twice and told me that you should call him back. Maybe you can do that later… And I called Yousef and asked to speak to Sana. She would like to see you tomorrow."

"Good, that's good."

Even's hand moves up and before Isak understands, he's caressing his face, his thumb stroking the cheek that has been abused a lot during the last weeks. "Are you okay? We don't have to go if you reconsidered. Or if you need more time… I can reschedule with Sana, baby. Don't worry. You don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"No, it's fine… I want to meet her and the Valtersens," Isak replies, lowering his eyes at the same time. "It's just that… that it's also scary at the same time. I don't know… is it weird?"

"Baby…" Even dips his chin up with his fingers, his thumb catching on the corner of Isak's lips. Isak has missed this so much - Even touching him and calling him baby. He wants to rejoice in it and forget about everything else going on, but he really can't. "It's not weird at all. Nothing you feel is weird, really. And to be honest, I think it's quite normal. Like… When I think of people who've been adopted and they start to investigate their past, it's the same for them. I don't know how comparable that is to your situation but yeah… Don't ever think what you're feeling is weird. Some people might not understand but that's their problem, not yours. Only you can feel what you feel."

Isak's eyes widen and, stunned, he repeats Even's words: "Only I can feel what I feel."

Even smiles, his thumb still in the corner of Isak's mouth. It makes Isak shiver and he looks up at Even with dazed eyes. "I missed you so much," is the only thing he can say. "I just missed you so, so much, Even."

"I missed you too," Even whispers back.

They look at each other, drowning in the others' eyes for what feels like forever, and just when Isak thinks he is ready to lean forward and capture Even's lips with his, they're interrupted by the phone ringing.

"Fucking Eskild," Even growls when he pulls out his mobile from his pocket and hands it to Isak. "He wants to talk to you, I guess… Here you go. I'll let you talk in peace. I'll be in my office, okay?"

Isak looks at the phone and then up at Even who's already walking across the room to get to the office. "Even?" He calls after him and he stops immediately and turns around to meet his gaze. "Do you think… Can we move? I don't think I'll… I wanna have a _home_. With you. But I don't think I can have that here."

"Uh…" Even's eyes turn bright and he licks his lips several times before he can answer. "A home," he repeats, saying the word with so much care and love. "Yes, yeah… We can totally move, Isak. I don't really feel comfortable here anymore either."

They smile at each other and then Even leaves and Isak takes the call from Eskild.

*

The closer they get to the big building containing the headquarters of Valtersen Inc, the more nervous Isak gets. He tries to hide it as best as he can from Even but eventually, it's just becoming too much and he needs to hold on to something. He's not quite sure if Even will be alright with it, since they're in public, but he grabs his hand nevertheless.

Immediately and without a doubt, Even takes Isak's hand into his and then brings their joint hands up to his face to place a kiss on Isak's knuckles. There is no shame, no second thoughts, nothing.

Isak smiles and when they stop in front of the building, he feels a little better already.

A small woman with brown hair, a spoon in her mouth and a cardboard box full of food in her hand walks up to them. She nods at Even and then turns towards Isak, looking him up and down while moving the spoon around in her open mouth. Isak frowns at her in utter confusion before looking at Even for help. But Even is just silently grinning at the woman.

What the hell?

"Uhm…" Isak clears his throat and extends his hand towards the woman. "I'm Isak… Are you Sana? It's nice to meet you."

Finally, the woman puts the spoon back into the cardboard box, wipes her hand on her white coat, and takes Isak's hand. "No, I'm not. My name is Christina Berg and I'm Sana's assistant. You can call me Chris though or whatever else you want."

Again, Isak frowns. Why would he want to call her by anything but her name? He just nods and waits for her to continue.

She keeps looking at him for a while, then shrugs and says: "Well, alright… Follow me then! Sana is already waiting for you. She is very excited to meet you, Isak. Totally relatable."

While Chris walks towards the entrance, Isak turns to Even and stares at him in complete confusion. "What the fuck is happening?"

Even laughs. "Baby, she's hitting on you."

"Hitting on me?" Isak frowns and quickly looks up the definition before he gasps. "What a weird way to hit on someone."

"I agree. Quoting movies to them is much better," Even smiles.

Pouting, Isak shoves him in the chest. "You're such an idiot sometimes," he mumbles and then walks up to the entrance to follow Chris. But he stops and turns around when he realizes that Even isn't following him. "What are you doing? Why are you not coming?"

"I'm not going in with you," Even replies, still smiling at him. "This is something you have to do on your own, Isak. It will be fine. Sana is really nice and it's not like I understand anything of the things she'll tell you."

"But…" Isak walks back to him and takes his hand again. "But… I'm not sure I can do this on my own."

Even leans down a little and presses a kiss to his forehead. "I know you can, Isak. You're strong and amazing. You're so much more than you think you are. And don't worry, I'll be over there in that café drinking a coffee with Yousef and Mik. I'm not far away and nothing will happen to you. If it gets too upsetting, you can just leave and come to the café."

"But…" Isak considers it for a while and eventually, he nods. "Fine. Okay… I will go in alone then."

Another kiss on his forehead. "I'm so proud of you."

"I'm not doing anything, Even," Isak says with an eye roll. Though, he can't do anything against the tiny smile forming on his lips. "Well… okay. See you in a bit then?!"

"Yes, see you in a bit."

Isak looks at him one more time before he turns around and follows Chris into the building in front of him.

While Isak looks around the entrance hall with big eyes, trying to take in as much detail as possible, Chris walks over to the reception desk and talks to the man behind it. When she comes back, she hands Isak a badge much like hers - except that it has a big V on it. "It's a visitor pass," she explains as she looks at Isak inspecting it. "It will allow you to enter the toilets and the cafeteria and stuff like that. Not the labs, though, you can only go in there with me or Sana…"

"Alright… but I don't need to go to the bathroom or the cafeteria, you know?" Isak replies with a shrug. Nevertheless, he takes the badge and hangs it around his neck.

Chris shrugs as well and pushes the elevator button before she turns around to Isak, smiling at him. "It's protocol."

"I know about protocols very well," Isak sighs.

Together, they step into the elevator. Chris pushes another button while Isak steps to the glass wall to look out. As they go up and up and up, he sees more and more of Bjørvika district and the Oslofjord. Isak marvels at the sight. It's a beautiful day and the water reflects the sun. It almost makes him forget his nervousness.

Only seconds later the elevator stops and when Isak looks down one more time, he guesses they're at least on the fifteenth floor.

Isak follows Chris like a puppy as she leads him to a huge room with secluded meeting spaces, work areas, and people and computers everywhere. He tries to take in as much as he can, but he's overwhelmed. Then they step through another door that Chris has to open with her badge.

Isak abruptly stops in his tracks and stares at what he's seeing.

It's robots.

Dozens of them.

A shiver runs down his back as he watches them move around and interact with the scientist, probably running tests on them and asking them things, maybe adjusting their programming. Is this how he started? He can't remember, he has no memories about anything before Sonja switched him on in their apartment. The first thing he can remember is seeing Even's face and his kind blue eyes.

"Is this… are they…?" Isak doesn't manage to put his questions into words but Chris seems to understand him anyway.

"They're not like you, Isak. No robot here is anything like you."

Isak has no time to think about this because another woman in a white coat, wearing a hijab over her head, is approaching them, a little smile playing around her lips. "Isak," she says as soon as she stops in front of him, extending her hand. "I'm Sana Bakkoush Acar. It's very nice to finally meet you."

"It's nice to meet you too," Isak replies and shakes her hand. Slowly, averting his eyes from the robots, to take Sana in completely.

She looks nice and very professional. Isak will believe in a second that she's the most intelligent and competent person in the room. Probably even in the whole building. Her aura is impressive - Isak doesn't think he's ever met a human like her.

"Let's go to my office, shall we?" Sana asks, not really waiting for Isak's reply, instead, she is turning around and going back the way she came from.

Isak stands there for a second, stunned and impressed and maybe also a little intimidated before he shakes out of it and follows the woman. She closes the office door behind Isak and takes a seat behind a big, tidy desk. Behind her are big windows overlooking the fjord, Isak can see the Opera House too. It's a nice view but Isak doesn't think Sana has much time to appreciate it.

"Sit," Sana says and Isak flinches at the order. Did he misjudge Sana already? He gapes at her, insecurely. It would also mean that Even misjudged her and somehow that feels even worse. However, Sana seems to immediately recognize his discomfort. "Sorry, I didn't mean to… I just meant you can have a seat if you want to. Of course, you don't have to sit. I'm sorry, it's just… I haven't been having the best day so far. But that's not your fault and I shouldn't take it out on you."

Relieved, Isak lets out the breath he's been holding and sinks down on the chair in front of her desk. "It's okay…" He whispers, gifting her with an insecure smile. "It's probably not even your fault."

Sana frowns at him curiously, leaning forward in her chair, resting her chin on her propped up hands. "You're astounding, Isak," she then says.

Isak can't do anything but blush.

He doesn't think anyone has ever called him astounding.

"Well… I guess Even has told you what I've been talking with him about," Sana saves him from trying to figure out how to react to her compliment. "But if you have any more questions, you can ask me anything."

"Yeah, we've talked about it… But to be honest, I still have a lot of questions. Even wasn't very detailed about the research and the technical details. I guess it's because he didn't understand it very well and because he doesn't really care about these things. But I need to know how…"

Sana smiles at him. "How you were built? How your Artificial Neural Network works? What research we have done to get there?"

"Yes," Isak breathes, now leaning forward as well, hanging on her every word.

So, they spend at least an hour talking about the research Sana and her colleagues have been working on, how they managed to put theory into practice and what tests they ran on him and the other robots to find out whether or not they succeeded. She shows him charts and notes and equations and schemes.

Isak gets more and more fascinated by the minute, feeling himself getting sucked into it by Sana's passionate display. It's really interesting to learn so much about himself but also about science and engineering and biology in general. He researches something every now and then while Sana keeps explaining things to him, showing him more charts.

Eventually, they are finished and Sana closes the folder, putting it away neatly before she looks at Isak again. "Now… I've told you everything I know and everything that happened here… Is it okay if I ask you some questions now, Isak?" 

"Yeah, sure… You can ask me anything," he replies. "But can I ask one more thing before that?" Sana nods with a frown. "What about the other robots like me that you sold? What happened to them?"

Sana nods again. "Yeah… I thought you might ask that. Well, I contacted the people who bought them when I finally managed to retrieve the data. They eventually agreed to give them back to us if they receive another robot. So, they are back here at the labs and we ran tests on them and asked them a lot of questions, too."

Isak looks at her expectantly and when she doesn't continue, he asks, "and? What about them?"

"They aren't anything like you, Isak. If that is what you're asking," Sana replies. "They are more advanced than other robots, yes. They are more attuned to humans and human feelings. They are also able to think for themselves to some extent, linking things together and making logical conclusions and decisions. But none of them have progressed like you, learning so fast and developing feelings and everything. I told you, Isak, you're astounding. I meant that… And that's why I have so many questions for you."

He feels like his head is spinning with this new information. If none of the other robots are like him, that means he's special. But why is he so special? They built all of them the same, gave them the same starting chances.

And yet…

Isak smiles happily to himself. "Even," he whispers.

"Even?" Sana asks, leaning forward again to frown at him. "What about Even?"

"It's because of Even that I progressed differently than the other robots," he says, looking Sana in the eyes now. "It's not me that is astounding, it's him. He made me special or whatever… He taught me everything."

A knowing, fond smile appears on Sana's face and she puts a hand on Isak's for a moment before regaining her professionalism. "So, Even… He was your reference person? How did you first perceive him?"

Isak thinks about his first days with Even and Sonja. "Strange," he says eventually. "I didn't understand him at all. He asked for my name and wanted to talk to me… I didn't understand what was going on. It wasn't how my programming told me humans would interact with me at all and I wasn't prepared. But he was always nice and kind and made sure that I had enough time to charge and everything."

"Okay, I see," Sana says while taking notes. "And how about Sonja? Wasn't she as nice to you? Did you have problems with her?"

"No… not in the beginning, you know? I mean… I didn't see her much at all. She just gave me my tasks and that was that. It was… normal? I don't know, it's just what I expected it to be or… That's the wrong word because I wasn't capable of expecting anything back then."

Sana nods, taking more notes. "I understand, yeah… but when you say at first, I assume this changed?"

"Yeah… it changed quite a bit," Isak sighs, a shiver running down his back as he thinks back to his more recent memories with Sonja. "Sonja was angry once she realized that Even and I started to spend more and more time together. Eventually, she got so angry that she hit me once. And then more often, when she took me away."

When Isak looks up, Sana's eyes are big and unbelieving. "She hit you?" She asks, her voice barely more than a whisper. "Wow, that's… I can't believe she did something like this. I'm so sorry, Isak. What happened then? She took you away? And, if you don't mind me asking, how did you feel after she hit you?"

"Awful," Isak whispers back. "I didn't understand why but I felt awful. And it hurt me, like physically it hurt. I started to cry, even. I never wanted to feel like this ever again and so I tried to act like a normal robot again and suppressed my feelings and everything. But it didn't work at all. And the taking away happened later, when Even and Sonja broke up."

"You cried?"

Isak can't help but blush again. "Uh… yeah, I don't know how that is even possible. But I did, yeah. And it wasn't the only time either."

"Hmmm… alright. We will run some tests later if that's alright with you," Sana says pensively while writing it down. "Maybe we can find out more about this… Anyway, I see that talking about Sonja is upsetting you, so let's get back to Even. You said you started to spend more time with him, right? So, you didn't think he was strange anymore?"

"No… or well, I don't know. In the beginning, I just wanted to learn more about him, so that I could be of better service to him. Because I didn't understand a thing about him and I was very insecure about how to act around him at the time… So, we watched movies together…"

*

After what feels like hours of talking with Sana and undergoing several tests in their labs, Isak feels exhausted.

He just wants to pick up Even from the café and go home with him.

And just when he thinks he might be able to because his talk with Sana seems to come to an end, there is a knock on the door.

"Come in," Sana calls and the door is opened immediately. A woman in her early fifties enters the room with an apologetic smile. Sana gets up from her chair and walks to greet the woman who doesn't seem to have taken notice of Isak just yet.

"Is he here already?" The woman asks Sana and when Sana turns her head to look at Isak, the woman's eyes follow her.

Isak feels weird.

There is a sense of familiarity and he can't possibly figure out where it might be coming from and what it means. The woman's face lights up and her smile broadens as she takes Isak in from head to toe. Eventually, her eyes meet his and they are green, as green as his, and Isak doesn't know what it means.

"Isak," the woman says, her voice so affectionate as if she were talking to a child. "It is so nice to finally meet you. You are even more incredible than I ever dreamed you to be."

Confused, Isak gets up from his chair and extends his hand. "It is very nice to meet you too, Madam."

"I'm Marianne," the woman introduces herself. "Marianne Valtersen. My husband and I founded this company and… well, we are also the people who came up with the idea to create robots like you."

Marianne is still looking at him, seemingly unable to focus on anything else but Isak, and he has no idea what to make of it, what it all means. Maybe she is just excited to meet her creation for the first time after he underwent the necessary steps to unfold his full potential. But that's not really how it feels to Isak; it feels like there is more.

"I'm gonna take my break now," Sana suddenly says, getting her coat from the coat rack and walking towards the office door. "Feel free to use my office for your talk. I think I'll be gone for a while. Yousef wanted to meet me for lunch."

"But Yousef is with Even and…" Isak starts but Sana is already out of the office and the door falls closed behind her.

Isak stares at the door in confusion for a while before he turns back to Marianne. He's trying to figure out what is going on - but all these little nuances of human behavior are still a mystery to him a lot of times. 

Marianne takes the seat behind Sana’s desk and looks at the folder Sana has been showing to Isak in the past hours. With a sigh, she pushes it to the side and redirects her focus on Isak. Isak wiggles a little under her eyes, still confused as to what her intentions are and what he should expect from her.

But he’s also curious about her and why he feels somehow connected to her, why she looks somehow familiar.

“You know,” she eventually speaks again, leaning forward in Sana’s chair. “I’ve had this dream for a long time. Creating life. Not only due to scientific reasons, though the scientific aspects of it all are more than fascinating."

Isak nods, because yes, they surely are. They are fascinating and some parts are still a mystery even to great scientists like Sana. Because even after running several tests, she was unable to explain how Isak was able to cry. Maybe Marianne had an explanation for that? Isak doesn't think so but he will try to ask her about it.

"I used to work in medicine, Isak," Marianne continues her story when Isak doesn't say anything. "But when medicine couldn't help me anymore, I turned to another part of science, the field my husband worked in. Technology, Artificial Intelligence - and together we made a lot of progress."

"Together you managed to create robots like me, robots that are capable of learning how to feel and to form their own opinions," Isak concludes.

Marianne nods and then shakes her head with a sigh. "Yes… we did. But this is not what I wanted to happen. Terje exploited the fact that I haven't been feeling very well lately and went behind my back to sell you. You and the others like you, I mean."

Isak frowns while studying her face to find out what this is all about. He thinks that she's trying to give him some hints, that she's telling him all of that for a specific reason but he just can't figure out what that reason might be.

For a while, they are both quiet - Isak because he doesn't know what to say anyway and Marianne because she is clearly struggling with saying what she wants to tell him.

"I always wanted children, you know?" Is what she eventually comes up with and Isak's confusion rises to a new peak. He feels like he should be able to connect the dots but he can't. "One, maybe even two. I think I would've been a good mother… maybe not perfect since I have a lot going on, but I would've loved my children with my whole heart. I would've supported them no matter what."

She makes another break as if she too is waiting for Isak to connect the dots. But he can't and he is slowly getting embarrassed about it. He should be able to figure this out, right? If she is expecting him to, he should be.

But then Marianne continues and Isak isn't sure anymore if she has been waiting for him or if she simply needed time to continue with her speech.

"I always wanted a boy, to be honest. I mean, of course, I would've been just as happy with a girl, but I don't know… I just always saw myself with a boy. Maybe I would bring him to football practice or guitar lessons… or even to dancing classes. I wouldn't have cared. But you know what is extraordinary? I would've called him Isak. Even though I agreed to call the line Adrian because Terje wanted it, I would've called my son Isak."

A shiver runs down Isak's back when she says that and a weird sense of understanding creeps up to him. He can't explain it and he can't grasp it quite yet but he feels like something big is about to happen.

"Even came up with the name or well… He called me Isaac Newton as a joke because I'm a know-it-all and then we decided on Isak because it's the Norwegian version and because of some biblical reference," Isak explains instead with his voice slightly shaking. "Isak means he will laugh."

"I know," Marianne smiles. "It's such a beautiful name. I'm glad your… friend picked it for you, Isak. Not only because it feels like destiny to me, but also because I think it fits you perfectly, you know? You're Isak."

Isak is too hung up on the word "friend" to think about the rest of the stuff she said. Something about destiny and whatever… 

Even isn't his friend. He's so much more and Isak wants to correct her, but he doesn't know how to or if it is even appropriate for him to say - or what to call Even. Is he his boyfriend, his partner? They haven't talked about it yet and since he's back from Sonja and Bente, everything still feels a little weird between them.

Marianne puts a hand on his and squeezes it lightly. "He isn't your friend, is he?" She asks with a knowing smile on her face.

Isak blushes.

Is he that obvious?

"Even is the best person in the world," Isak replies, still blushing. If he's unable to give a name to it, it doesn't really matter, does it? The only thing that matters is what Even means to him and what they have. "He's everything. I wouldn't be here now without him and I still wouldn't know a thing about feelings."

"He sounds lovely, I will have to meet him," Marianne says, still smiling. "I'm glad you found someone like that, Isak."

Isak sits up in his chair and looks at Marianne's hand still on his. He feels like realization slowly creeps in on him. "Can I- Can I ask you something too?" He waits for her to nod before he continues. "When you say that medicine failed you, what do you mean by that?"

When he sees how Marianne recoils, her eyes turning sad, Isak wants to apologize right away, but Marianne talks first.

"Terje and I tried to have children for many years. We tried everything possible at the time, but nothing worked. Nothing. Eventually, a gynecologist found out that I am the problem. I can't have children. And there's nothing that could be done about it… Medicine has failed me. I tried to find a way, a new treatment or something - but there is still nothing that could help a woman in my situation."

"I'm sorry," Isak whispers when he feels how much it pains her still. How much she wished to have kids and yet that was the one thing that life has denied her in all those years. A dream crumbled and crushed by biology and medicine. "And then what made you turn to Artificial Intelligence? I don't see the connection, to be honest."

Marianne nods and inconspicuously tries to dry her eyes. "You wouldn't… that's okay. It was an idea born out of… well, deep hurt and desperation, I think. I was depressed and I still wanted a child. And if biology didn't allow me to create a life."

"Then maybe technology could," Isak finishes her sentence with a gasp. "You wanted to create your own child?!"

Marianne smiles weakly.

"You're so clever and you learn so fast," she says after a moment she took to gather her senses. "Yes, I guess that's what I thought. That if we could create robots as human as possible it would be like I'd finally have a child."

Isak leans back in his chair, trying to think about what he has just learned, trying to understand Marianne's motifs and how they fit with what actually happened in the end. It doesn't quite fit together; not yet at least. But then again, she said that Terje took advantage of her not feeling well… Maybe that's the missing piece between dream and reality.

Suddenly, Marianne looks up at him again, watching him deeply with her green eyes that are glistening with tears. "It's… you are… You look exactly like I thought you would," she whispers. "We created you with the help of biological rules and genetics. So that you would look like… like Terje's and my son would have looked like."

It's like she just added the last missing piece to a puzzle and everything that has happened in the last hour or so, everything she said, the way she reacted when she first met him, all of that suddenly makes so much more sense.

They created him to look like their potential son, like the child she wished for her whole life but couldn't have.

Isak pulls his hand up to his eyes and can feel his own tears wetting his fingers. He started crying without even realizing it. It's the first time he's crying for someone else, not because he got hurt or feels like shit. He is crying because he feels for Marianne and this is the only way to let it all out - because he doesn't know what he can say to this revelation.

"Sorry… I'm sorry, Isak," Marianne apologizes, crying herself. "Maybe I shouldn't have told you this. But then again I thought you should know."

"No, it's alright… I came here to find out where I came from. I wanted answers."

Marianne gets a tissue from her purse and offers one to Isak as well. He takes it gladly and wipes his eyes. "I guess this was not the answer you were looking for?!"

"No, that's not it," Isak rectifies immediately. "I wasn't looking for a specific answer. I was just looking for the truth. So, I'm not disappointed or anything like that. I'm just… surprised, I guess. And I'm also not sure… what you expect of me now? What I should say or do or…"

"I don't expect anything of you, Isak. If you had asked me a couple of weeks ago, I might have answered this differently, but… I'm better now and I know that you're not my child. You don't owe me anything. I'm fine, really… I think I made a mistake, thinking we could play God and create life. I mean, we succeeded, with you at least. You're human beyond my wildest dreams, Isak. You're really astounding and I'm so happy that you found Even."

Isak automatically smiles when she mentions Even. There's nothing he can do about it and he wonders if that will always be his reaction to someone mentioning Even's name. "I understand. Can you… How did Terje betray you?"

"Well, for one, I thought there would be only you," Marianne replies with a sigh. "But he created more robots similar to you without my knowledge. And then, he betrayed everyone by putting you all up for sale. No one was consulted about this, he just did this on his own, thinking that since he owns the company, he can just do whatever the fuck he wants. As I said before, I wasn't feeling well because I was realizing how wrong I was for playing "God" and trying to create life. So, I saw none of this coming until it was all too late. For him, it's all about the money when all I ever wanted…"

 _Was to have a child_ , Isak finishes her sentence in his head. "I'm so sorry," he says out loud instead. "Really, I am. He doesn't sound like a very… likable person."

Oh, shit. He's talking about her husband, he probably shouldn't have said that.

"He used to be," Marianne sighs, apparently taking no offense. "But the fame and money, it has changed him a lot over the years. And that we weren't able to have a child also had its impact on him. While it made me depressed, it turned him into a money-hungry, bossy kind of person who cheats on his wife."

Isak bites his lip, unsure of what he is allowed to say and what he isn't. Eventually, he decides to just blurt it out. "Will you get a divorce? I don't think you should stay with a person like that, you deserve better. I'm sorry if I'm overstepping but it's just that I think you're very nice while he sounds like a… _dick_."

Suddenly, Marianne chuckles and then she's laughing through her tears and Isak can't help but smile broadly himself. He apparently has done something right and he is rather happy to see Marianne laugh.

Everything she has told him, makes him feel closer to her. Even if he isn't the child she wished for, maybe they can still be something like friends.

"You could… meet Even," he says when they have calmed down. "If you want to… I mean, I don't know if you'd want that. But maybe it would be nice? You could come to dinner once we moved into a new flat."

When Marianne doesn't answer, Isak blushes and feels dumb.

Of course, she wouldn't want that - what was he even thinking asking something like that? It must be the dumbest idea he ever had.

"I'd love that a lot," she eventually says before Isak can blurt out his apologies. "Yes, please, Isak. If that is alright with you and Even. I would love to meet him and get to know both of you better."

Isak smiles shyly. "Yeah?"

"Yes, Isak," Marianne says before getting up from the chair. She steps out from behind the desk and takes a step towards Isak. Insecurely, he looks up at her and tries to figure out what she is up to. "I'm very happy about how this talk went. I was more than nervous to meet you, you know?"

"I was nervous too," he admits.

With a smile, Marianne leans forward a little and brushes a curl that has gone astray back behind his ear. Isak shivers at the gesture and then, he takes Marianne's hand into his before she can move it away. He squeezes her hand while smiling up at her and Marianne reciprocates the gesture. "I'm glad I came, though."

"Me too, Isak, me too," Marianne whispers back and pulls away. "I must get back now… but I hope we'll see each other again soon."

She is almost at the door when Isak follows another impulse and jumps from his chair to turn her back around. Before she even realizes what is happening, Isak has pulled her in and encloses her in his arm, hugging her tight to his body.

They hug for what feels like minutes before they let go of each other and Marianne leaves the office with a smile.

*

The first thing Isak hears upon entering the café is Even's loud and bright laugh. It makes a shiver run down his back and he quickly makes his way towards the table where Even is sitting with Mikael, Sana and another man whom Isak assumes must be Yousef.

Sana smiles up at him as he steps behind Even who has his back to him. Isak then puts his hands on his shoulders and Even flinches in his chair before quickly turning around to see who is standing there. Within milliseconds the shock vanishes from his eyes and his whole face lights up with a broad, enamored smile.

Isak is beyond proud and happy to evoke this kind of reaction from Even and he's sure the same smile is playing around his own lips as well.

"You're disgustingly in love," Mikael complains next to Even before drowning the rest of his coffee. "Even worse than Yousef and Sana… It makes me feel way too fucking lonely. I gotta leave before I have to throw up… or cry."

Yousef rolls his eyes at him and kicks him under the table. "Dramatic bitch!"

"I have to get back to the office, too," Sana says and gets up from her chair, looking down at Yousef. "Walk me there?"

Yousef nods and before they leave, Sana steps up to Isak to hand him an envelope. Isak takes it with a confused look. "Take a look at it and let me know what you think about it," Sana tells him in a low voice. "Take your time with your decision, though. It is a big step."

"What's that?" Even asks once he has said his goodbyes and Isak has settled on the chair across from him, still holding the envelope as if it were a precious love letter.

Isak shrugs. "I'm not sure," he mumbles before opening the letter to find out what it is that Sana has given to him and which she thinks he should consider carefully. After unfolding the papers, it takes him a moment to understand what he is holding in his hands. But when he does, he hands them to Even with a gasp. "They are offering me a job."

"Wow, that's amazing, baby," Even smiles while reading the offer.

Isak frowns at him. "But I can't take it, Even. I already have a job."

Confused, Even looks up to frown at Isak. "Huh? What job? You have been hiding a job from me all this time? What are you doing? Are you some secret agent from the government?"

"What the fuck?" Isak looks outraged. And Even just laughs at him. "Why are you making fun of me right now? You know exactly what my job is, Even."

"No, baby, I have, in fact, no idea," Even replies. He puts the papers down and takes Isak's hand into his instead. "Enlighten me, please."

Isak has no idea why Even thinks this is funny, but okay… whatever. He won't let this bother him. The last hours have been too straining to deal with stuff like that. "Well, obviously, I work for you."

Everything in Even's face shows Isak that he wasn't prepared for that, that he wasn't making fun of Isak at all. Even has indeed no idea that this is what Isak meant. But how can he not? Sonja and he have acquired Isak for exactly that purpose!

"Isak," Even says heavily once he has regained control over his face and his voice. His hand is squeezing Isak's. "That is not your job. Well, at least not anymore. I know how things were when Sonja was around, but that is not how our lives are gonna be from now on. Okay?"

Isak tilts his head and looks at Even questioningly. "No? Then how are our lives going to be from now on? Who will cook for you and clean the flat and go grocery shopping?"

"We will. Both of us, Isak. And we are going to do it together or split it up equally between us. You're not my robot anymore and I don't want you to do these things for me, okay? We're equals in this relationship now."

"Relationship," Isak repeats in a whisper and thinks back to his previous conversation with Marianne. He blushes heavily and stares at their hands so that he doesn't have to look at Even. "Does this mean… are you my boyfriend?"

Even laughs, but it doesn't sound malicious or condescending or like he's making fun of him - it sounds happy and when Isak looks up, he can see Even's eyes crinkle in the most beautiful way.

He wants to fucking kiss him… and who's stopping him, really?

Just as a "yes, of course, you are, you silly boy" comes over Even's lips, Isak leans forward over the table and captures them with his own.

And it feels like the world stops existing around them. There's only Even and Isak, Isak and Even.

It is Even who deepens the kiss after a while, almost pulling Isak out of his chair. "Maybe we should go home," he sighs, realizing their restrictions in the café, but without detaching from Isak's lips.

They leave the café eventually, walking through Bjørvika district hand-in-hand and stopping every once in a while to kiss or to make out against a building wall.

It takes them forever to reach the tram stop where Isak leans against Even and Even wraps his arms around Isak. "Well, what do you think about the job offer now that you realized that you don't actually have a job?" Even asks as they wait for their tram.

Isak pulls his head back a little to look at Even. "I'm not sure," he admits honestly. "I think I could maybe help them. And I think that it would interest me too to work with other robots and to learn more about AI and everything."

"But?" Even asks while carefully brushing some curls out of Isak's face.

"But I'm scared." Isak nuzzles further into Even's chest, basking in the comfort and the security it gives him. Rejoicing in the fact that he can do this now, every day, until the end of Even's life. And he allows himself the luxury to not yet think about what will happen after that, because Even is here and his heart is beating strongly under his clothes. "Do you think I can do this? I'm scared I will suck at this… having a job, interacting with humans, and even robots. Because I'm not like any of them, am I? I'm not a human, but I'm also not a robot anymore. It's gonna be weird, isn't it?"

Even pulls him in tighter, keeping him safe, shielding him from the world. "Well, I can't account for that, but really… you're the most human I know, Isak. You're compassionate, attentive, considerate, charming… And you're clever and motivated for the job. You're always willing to learn and to get better at understanding things and people. There's really nothing to not like about you. And I will come for anyone who is mean to you."

"You're an idiot," Isak snorts while looking deep into Even's eyes. "But at least you're my idiot."

Before Even can say anything, Isak gets on his tiptoes to steal another kiss from Even's already reddening lips. They kiss slowly and deep and Isak subconsciously registers at least two trams passing by while they kiss and kiss and kiss. But what does it matter anyway? It's not like they have to be anywhere and it's not like Isak doesn't enjoy the old man next to them gasping at them in outrage when they finally part with a loud smacking noise.

Out of breath, Isak smiles up at Even who smiles back at him with rosy cheeks and chapped lips. Isak is about to say something along the lines that maybe they should continue this at home when Even puts his index fingers on his lips. Isak can't resist pressing a kiss against the warm, soft skin and making Even's eyes sparkle.

"I love you," Even says, his eyes deep and clear and soft, his words embracing Isak and wrapping him in something that feels like… _home_ and love. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too."

They just smile at each other while the rest of the world dissipates around them once again. The grumpy old man was gone, another tram passing by them, the air getting colder, and the sun slowly setting. Nothing of it matters while they are standing there, looking at each other as if they haven't seen each other in months.

After another kiss, they finally manage to catch a tram, sitting close to each other in their seats, touching with as many body parts as possible, their hands locked in each other.

"I think, I'll take the job," Isak blurts out after three stops. He takes the folded paper from his pocket and unfolds it again, looking at the last pages he hasn't checked before. "I think that it's a good… _holy shit_."

Isak almost drops the job offer when he sees the number indicating what Valtersen Inc. would pay him for this job.

"What?" Even asks, trying to catch his attention by cupping Isak's cheek with a hand. "Baby, what's happening?"

"Uhm... " Isak hands him the paper and points to the number. "This is like a lot-lot, right? I wasn't expecting this at all."

Even's eyes widen and he nods. "A lot-lot indeed," he mumbles and then folds the papers and puts them away. Taking Isak's face in both his hands now. "Well, good for you. You deserve it, baby. And if they're willing to pay you this much, then it only shows how much they want you to work for them. So, you'll do it?"

"Yeah… I think I will. Not because they offer me this much money, though. Just because I think it will be really cool," Isak replies.

Even chuckles. "Of course, baby. I would never accuse you of taking the job for the money. That's really not like you. But it will definitely help us find a new flat. Most landlords just look at me weird when I tell them that I'm a director… but with you working for Valtersen Inc. we could probably get any flat we want."

"What? So, now you're just using me for my money, yeah?" Isak jokes and they both burst out into giggles, entertaining the whole tram that is luckily pretty empty. Most people just look at them amicably.

Once they are out of breath, Isak leans against Even with a content smile. "I can't wait to start my new life with you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you all think? How do you feel about Marianne's story? Will Isak like his new job? What will their new life bring these two lovebirds? <3  
> Next up will be Even's chapter and then an Epilogue and then it will be time to say goodbye to this universe. Can you believe it?? :(


	17. alt jeg gjør er sammen med deg (everything I do is with you)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even and Isak find a new home as well as the strength to face whatever the future holds for them.
> 
> (Basically, no plot, just fluff.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here comes Even's time! I hope it will make up for the angst from the previous chapters, and give you hope, in many ways. Enjoy <3
> 
> (ALSO, I can't believe we wrote more than 100.000 words??? HOW? And a huge thank you, once again, for your heartwarming support. We love you a whole lot!)

Moving took longer than what they would have liked, much to their dismay. And in particular, the search for a new place to live in. 

Even is more than eager to leave the apartment he has shared with Sonja for years, no matter the conditions, especially after she started to give him angry calls everyday to know when her name will officially be off the rental agreement - pointless, since it won't change anything concrete in her life, but Sonja loves making things difficult for him over small details. She doesn't have anything left at the flat, ever since she came by to move the rest of her belongings, while Even made sure to keep Isak busy somewhere else, far away from her. Therefore, the place remains half-empty for days now, Sonja's ghost hovering over them in every corner of every room where there was once something that belonged to her, but at least, it isn't her stuff they are looking at anymore, just empty spaces. It isn't ideal, but at the end of the day, Even doesn't care that much as long as he is with Isak.

Isak, on the other hand, cares. He doesn't like that they have nowhere else to stay while they are looking for their future home, but he won't settle for anything else than perfect, which is why it takes them so long to move out. He cares enough to complain about it every day, but not enough to give up on his search for their utopian home. 

"The last apartment we visited was pretty good," Even told him one night after Isak spent 30 minutes trying to convince Even they could sleep at a hotel until they found the ideal place, because:  _ I've got money now, Even, we can afford it!  _ Even could hardly refuse him anything, but to this, he firmly said no, albeit with a grin, enamoured with his boyfriend's tantrum - he couldn't help it, most things Isak did, he found adorable. So he tried, once again, to convince Isak they could simply pick among the decent places they had visited already. 

In vain.

"What?! Pretty good isn't perfect, Even. I refuse!"

The whole thing is even funnier to Even considering that, at first, Isak didn't act so picky. In fact, it's been the opposite.

Their first few apartment viewings, Isak was silent, withdrawn, letting Even talk and ask all the questions directly to the real estate agent. Isak wasn't disinterested, not by any means; Even could see that he was examining every nook and cranny of each place meticulously, that he would listen to the real estate agent's answers carefully and most of the questions Even was meant to ask have been requested by Isak beforehand. Not to mention that during his free time, Isak spent hours watching television programs on home renovation and decoration. Nevertheless, Isak gave very little of his opinion out loud. Even thought it was curious in a funny way, or that was, until he understood the reason behind his boyfriend's behavior.

They were standing in the middle of yet another apartment, the real estate agent just offered to give them some time alone and Even agreed with a polite smile. Once it was just the two of them, Even asked the same question as he always did:

"So… What do you think?"

To which Isak replied with the same exact answer as usual: "It's… Nice, right? Do you like it?"

In retrospect, he knows that he should have understood it much earlier, the second Isak used the word "nice" for the first time. He still remembers his conversation with Isak, months ago, when the boy explained to him that for him the word "nice" was meaningless, a word that people use to avoid having to give their honest opinion. So it made no sense for Isak to use it himself, unless... 

Unless he was deliberately dodging Even's question. 

So, to prove his theory, Even decided on a test. The apartment they've just seen wasn't very clean, had small windows and not enough light, and suspicious water stains on the ceiling. Surely, Isak must have noticed them right away if Even did, too. Even the location wasn't what they had in mind, too far away from Isak's workplace and in a boring area.

In all logic, it couldn't be their new dream home. 

That's why Even grinned and said, "I love it. This is the one, right? It feels right."

Isak blinked at him in surprise for long seconds. He's been sporting an impeccable poker face all through the visit but now, his act was finally falling off. 

Still, Isak replied in a small voice, "huh, yeah, sure. It's… Great." 

"Yeah? You love it too?"

"Do  _ you _ love it? You really do?" Isak asked again, his astonishment clear.

"Of course, don't you?"

"Yeah, I mean, sure. But… Are you sure?"

"I'm sure, perfectly sure. Aren't you?"

"No, that's not what I said, I just want to make sure that you're sure…"

It was clearly a never-ending circle of polite manners, so Even decided to take it a bit further before they both lost their mind over it. "If we both love it and think this is the one, then I'm going to tell the agent we want it. Let's settle this as soon as possible, you agree?"

And without waiting for an answer, Even started walking away from the depressing living room. And just like he predicted, Isak ran after him and grabbed him by the wrist, gently, like his touch on Even always is, but strong enough to stop him.

"What's going on, baby?" Even asked with a fake oblivious expression.

Panicked, Isak cried, "don't! This place is a slum!"

Even couldn't hold back a snort. "It's hardly a slum, come on baby-"

"Are you messing with me?!" Isak groaned in exasperation.

"But you said you loved it?"

Isak rolled his eyes, seeing right through him now. "Ugh, I don't! How would I? And there is no way you love it either, what are you even saying?!"

Now it really sounded like his grumpy Isak. 

"Of course, I think this place is shit, Isak," Even admitted, while freeing himself from Isak's grip to take Isak's face between his hands, brushing his thumbs along his jaw to soothe him. "But why won't you speak your mind instead of asking me what I think over and over again? Why won't you  _ ever _ tell me what you really think?"

Isak shifted awkwardly on his feet, looking a bit embarrassed. Like he's been caught doing something bad, which… in a way, isn't completely false, but not something Even would be mad at him for. He could never.

"Sweetheart? What's wrong?" He asked softly, although he got the general idea already. He knew Isak better than he knew himself after all.

Isak sighed, resigned. "I just wasn't sure if I was allowed to."

"Allowed? Isak, we've talked about this. There is nothing you're not allowed to do anymore. There are no rules. You're free. I know it's still complicated outside, because of… some people. But with me, and with our friends, and your colleagues, you're always free to say and do whatever you want," Even said, almost pleading with his boy to believe him, once and for all. Although they've been living together as equals for weeks now, there are still times when Isak has doubts about his own worth, and it breaks Even's heart. If only Isak knew how much Even values him, how important he is to him. 

He needed Isaks to know that his opinion mattered, and that if he wanted to annoy their real estate agent with hundreds of questions, if he wanted to argue with Even about the color of their future curtains (they did argue about it later, and the color yellow won) or the necessity of having a balcony (Isak established later that yes, they needed one, so Even could smoke on it while Isak stared at him from the sofa), then he was more than allowed to.

"I just don't want you to regret it," Isak whispered, looking down to avoid Even's gaze.

"To regret it? What do you mean?"

"Me. Moving in with me."

And here it was again, Even's heart hurting because of how little trust Isak had in himself. But Even knew he couldn't show him how upset it made him, for it would only make Isak feel worse, so he buried everything deep inside and leaned to kiss Isak's forehead. 

"Baby, I would never regret it. You're the best thing in my life," he promised, and then sealed it with more kisses scattered all over his face, until Isak started giggling under his ministrations. "And who knows? Maybe you're the one who's going to regret it." Isak shook his head immediately, frowning at him. "Yes, you could get sick of me, but you know what? That's another thing you're allowed to, okay? If it happens, you're allowed to leave."

"But I won't, because there is no universe where I would ever get sick of you," Isak retorted, and his words never sounded more final.

"Ditto," Even smiled against his boyfriend's lips. "Just… Don't forget your opinion is as important as mine, and we are building our home together, the two of us, okay?"

Isak looked up at him, his eyes filled with so much fondness and sentiment that Even felt it everywhere, inside and out. With a content sigh, Isak whispered back, "our home. Together."

Even nodded, soaking into this mutual feeling of satisfaction, of endless affection, before waving at the empty room and asking again, "so… What do you think?"

The mood shifted, turning light and playful as Isak scoffed and took his hand to pull him towards the door, "this place is shit, and I want  _ perfect _ . Let's go, we are leaving."

Even laughed, and he laughed even harder when Isak told their real estate agent he needed to drastically raise the standards of the next appartements he would decide to show them because it wouldn't do for them.

And so, ever since, Isak has been inflexible, to such an extent that he almost pushed their agent to give up on them, and perhaps change his profession for good - the poor man. To be honest, Even almost gave up, too, thinking that maybe their ideal apartment was just a dream and they were actually the ones who needed to lower their expectations. 

But Isak was determined. Even was able to convince him to drop his "let's go live in a hotel while we search" idea, but he couldn't make him give up on his - their - dream apartment. 

Which, finally, has led them to this day, and to this place.

To their future, perfect new home.

The apartment is located on the top floor of a renovated building, so they have an unobstructed view from most of the large windows which invite natural light in, and especially from the balcony, big enough to be a modest terrace, which Isak was particularly keen on. The different rooms are empty, obviously, but it doesn't feel as cold and soulless as some of the places they've visited before. The walls are white, like immaculate canvases they will be free to paint on if they want to; and the floor is a light parquet, which Even has been asking for from the start.

The main area is large enough for them to settle into a comfortable space where they will be able to watch movies from a video projector, cuddled on the couch, next to what could be the perfect spot to put a large dining table for their future dinner parties with their friends. And at the back of the room, right in front of the table, there is a half-opened kitchen with a bar in-between, where they would be able to cook together without stepping on each other's feet, all while chatting with their guests. 

Besides the bathroom, where they were happy to point out the shower seemed big enough to fit the two of them together, the apartment had two other rooms: a master bedroom that would be theirs and only theirs, Even thought joyfully (no more guestroom to avoid the bedroom he used to share with his ex-fiancée), and another room they knew they would use as a shared office - Even claimed Isak was his new muse and he would work better by having him around, where he could admire him for hours, and Isak admitted he couldn't focus when he felt Even's eyes on him but "what's the point of living together if you're not looking at me anyway?". So, shared office it is.

Really, from the moment they've stepped inside the apartment, they both felt it, this sense of familiarity, like maybe they knew the place - from another life, another universe, perhaps - and have lived there before.

"This is the one, isn't it?" Isak asks, his voice echoing into the empty space, his words being echoed to him, not as a question but almost as a confirmation.

Even grins and nods slowly, while his eyes travel across the room to find Isak, who's standing in front of the glass door of the balcony, his curls glittering under the rays of sunshine like a halo around his angelic face.

"I think it's the 'perfect' we've been looking for," Even agrees and Isak breaks into a beaming smile.

They gravitate towards each other, so Even ends up wrapping an arm around his boy, reeling Isak in closer, his back pressed against Even's chest, all while they watch the living area in front of them pensively. 

"Can you picture us here?" Even whispers into Isak's ear. "Can you see us living here?"

"Well, I can't exactly see us, but I can imagine us, yes," Isak replies seriously, always the practical kind.

It gives Even an idea. "Really? You don't see it?"

"What?"

"Look, the table over there," Even says with a grin, pointing at the empty spot in front of the kitchen. "On this table, we will serve food we cooked together for our friends."

Isak remains silent for a while, like he always does when Even is acting a bit too irrational for him, but then he catches up on him.

"Oh, sure," Isak nods resolutely. "What about… This radiator?" He asks, waving at said radiator right next to them.

Even holds back a laugh. Of all things, Isak had to pick a physically present radiator. But that's okay: he will get it eventually.

"Well… In front of this radiator we will argue about electric consumption."

"That's… Very boring and domestic of us," Isak points out, and although Even can't see his face properly, he knows Isak is smiling at the prospect. Boring and domestic means they will be together, and for a long time, and so they are both loving the idea. "Tell me more."

Even takes him to the bathroom, where he tells him, "see the washing machine? That's where you're going to sit on, while I'm shaving in the morning." 

Then they head to the office, and that's where, finally, Isak points at an invisible desk and says, "this is the desk you're going to write hundreds of masterpieces." 

And Even loves him so much, in every possible way, he can't help but capture Isak's lips, kissing him over and over again until they end up in their future master bedroom and Even whispers into Isak's neck, "and in this bed, we will make love all night."

They are interrupted minutes - or maybe hours, who knows - later by the real estate agent, who definitely looks like he's done with their bullshit for good and is ready to quit. But before he has a chance to do it, Even tucks a curl behind Isak's ear, presses one last kiss on his swollen lips, and announces, "this is it. You found it." 

The guy blinks at them, stunned. Perhaps he had lost all hope of finding the right place for them? But he did. In the end, he succeeded. So, Isak smiles at the poor guy he's been bossing around for weeks, and adds, "we are taking it. This is our perfect home. Thank you so much."

Their real estate agent looks like he's about to cry from emotion, too.

They move in the following week.

*

Once they are settled, they take their time furnishing their apartment, so every piece of furniture, every detail, means something to them. Thankfully, one of their first purchases together is a large dining table, which makes things much easier when they decide, barely a bit over a week after they moved in, to invite all their friends for a dining slash house-warming party.

True to himself, Isak takes it very seriously, spending days planning the menu, calling everybody to take notes on their allergies, likes, dislikes, favorite dishes. In their new office, Isak nails a board on the wall, and instead of filling it with mysterious, complicated equations related to his job, he writes down mind maps and charts to elaborate the "perfect menu" to satisfy all their friends. Then it quickly turns into something as confusing as Isak's work would have been when Isak starts looking for obscure and complex recipes. At first amused, Even gradually grows alarmed at his boyfriend's new obsession and ultimately, it takes stealing his marker pens away from him and torrid foreplays on the floor of their office to get him to focus on something else. Only then did Even manage to give him some advice so Isak ended up agreeing on something much simpler but just as good.

Such moments really reminded Even of how every day with Isak would be a new adventure, and he couldn't wait to live the next one with him, and the next, and the next…

So they invite all their friends and Isak  _ only  _ spends ten hours preparing dinner. Even is allowed to help him but not to take creative liberties because "there are recipes for a reason, Even, you're supposed to follow the instructions". Of course, Even doesn't listen and it results in Isak threatening to move out already before changing his mind and requesting, as an apology from Even, for them to make out against their kitchen cupboards for half an hour - and if you ask Even, it seems more than fair after his affront.

Finally, on Friday night, they welcome all their friends into their new home: Mikael and Even's closest friends from work, Elias, Eva, Vilde, Jonas and Linn, Eskild, obviously, and then Yousef, as well as Isak's new colleagues, Sana, Chris, and after little reflexion from Isak's part, Marianne, too. All of them are more than delighted to discover Even's and Isak's new home, but most of all, to see Isak safe and radiant. 

"I'm so glad I didn't let you give up on him and dragged your ass to Valtersen Inc," Mikael boasts proudly, barely minutes after he arrived. "Now, look at him! Look at you!"

"You didn't drag me anywhere, you simply called Yousef to the rescue," Even points out with a smirk.

" _ Simply _ ?! How dare you?! Ungrateful brat!"

"I did most of the job, really," Yousef intervenes with a teasing smile. 

"You did what?" Sana interrupts them, raising a judgmental eyebrow at both Mikael and Yousef. "Tell me again who saved the day, as always?"

Unanimously, they end up agreeing on her superior intervention.

Eskild in particular, who witnessed with his own eyes part of what Isak went through at Bente's house, spends most of his night tearing up and hugging Isak at the most random times, much to Isak's dismay, who likes to pretend he doesn't love the affection.

Then, "you're making my baby robot so happy," Eskild tells Even at some point during the night, giving Isak a break. He's tipsy from the wine, stumbling on his feet while trying to move his body to the rhythm of the music they started playing while waiting for dessert. 

"He's making me happy, too. The happiest I've ever been," Even states, his eyes leaving Eskild to find Isak on the other side of the room, like a Pavlovian reflex. At first Isak is too busy talking with Mikael, Jonas and Eva to notice, but then, all of sudden, he looks away and meets Even's gaze, breaking into a beautiful smile. 

"Ah!" Eskild sighs, loud and dramatic. "You two are so in love! I want my disgustingly romantic love story too!" He claims before walking away, probably searching for another bottle of wine.

Even laughs, and when he looks back at Isak, so is he.

They eat dessert, and just like the starter and the main course, it's delicious. Everybody congratulates Isak for dinner before pouring themselves more wine - or soft drinks, depending on who you ask - and then they raise the volume of the music, to make sure Even's and Isak's neighbors have the best opinion on them from the start.

It fascinates Even, to see Isak among so many people, and act like such a social butterfly, walking from a small group of guests to another, chatting, laughing, beaming and even dancing with some of them - Eskild, without surprise, but also Vilde, Chris or even Sana. In that moment, happiness seems like such an insufficient word to describe how they are feeling - Isak, he assumes, but Even himself, too.

Later, when Even needs a break and a smoke, he finds his way to the balcony. He feels so full: from dinner, sure, but also from a strong feeling of fulfillment. Finally, everything is as it always should have been. His whole life has led him to this, to this life with Isak, and although he wishes he could change some moments of the past, all of them involving Isak getting hurt, he knows he wouldn't have it any other way.

"Am I intruding?" He hears behind him - a woman's voice.

Even turns around and smiles politely at Marianne, who joins him on the balcony, her expression reserved but her posture confident, decided - the way she must have learnt to be to survive, because she spent her whole life fighting against the odds as well as for proper acknowledgement of her genius. In so many ways, Even admires her. And not only because without her, he wouldn't have Isak by his side; although, to be honest, this argument, in his heart, will always win over anything else.

"Not at all, please, join me. Are you enjoying the night?" Even asks, feeling too formal for the circumstances but realizing that he's feeling intimidated. A bit like he's meeting the parents for the first time, which, to some extent, is kind of true. Apart from the brief moment they had when Marianne first arrived, a few hours ago, Even never had the opportunity to spend time alone with her.

"Very much so. Thank you for having me." Marianne sounds grateful, sincerely so. She leans against the balcony railing and looks back at the crowded living room through the glass door. Even follows her gaze and finds, once again, Isak within seconds. He's now speaking with Sana, Yousef, Elias and Chris. Judging by Elias' confused expression and Yousef's polite grin, it must be about work. Or science. Or anything genius-like that Even wouldn't understand either. "I couldn't believe it when Isak called me and invited me for dinner," Marianne says, and Even brings his attention back to her.

"Why?"

"I didn't think he would want me to be a part of his happiness," she admits. "I've been selfish, and it put him into a lot of suffering."

"I don't think he sees it that way though," Even can't help but point out, for he knows Isak never resented Marianne for anything that happened. 

"I guess," she whispers. "You know, I've been missing something my whole life and I thought it was the experience of raising my own child. To see them grow up, and being a part of it, every step of the way. But now I'm not so sure." She pauses, but Even lets her gather her thoughts while he studies her face in the half-darkness of the balcony, struck, just like the first time she has walked inside their apartment, by her astonishing resemblance with Isak. He saw it on photographs before, but witnessing it in real life is another thing entirely. "I'm looking at Isak, and I have nothing to do with the person he became. I didn't raise him. Yet, I'm happy. I'm not missing anything anymore. I don't know what that is but- Oh, I must sound very silly now, I'm sorry."

"You're not, I totally understand," Even promises her in all honesty. Somehow, she makes sense to him.

"Really?"

Even nods. "I've always felt incomplete. I had everything: a comfortable life, my dream job with promising opportunities, and a long-term relationship with a woman I was meant to marry. But I wasn't happy. It took me a long time to understand what the problem was, but, eventually, I think I figured it out: I didn't feel  _ alive _ anymore. I was alive, but I didn't feel like it. And then, Isak came into my life and all of sudden, life made sense again." On the other side of the glass door, Even spots Isak looking around the room, looking for something… "Isak thinks I taught him what love is, but in reality, I think Isak is the one who taught me what it really feels like. And not only to love and to be loved, but also to love life itself. He reminded me life is worth it and it can be whatever I want, if I'm ready to fight for it." ...Looking, until he finds Even, and notices Marianne beside him, and a light blush spreads on Isak's face. "And you know what? No matter the reasons you did it, I will forever be grateful to you."

"I'm grateful to  _ you _ ," Marianne shakes her head. "You protected him, gave him love and freedom and you never made him feel wrong about himself. That's so much more than what Terje ever did, for anyone, and especially me," she confesses, looking down at her feet, turning a bit sad at the mention of her husband.

"You deserve better," Even says, and means it, as he takes her hands between his to squeeze them gently in comfort. "And I think I know what you've been missing, and found through Isak, eventually."

"You do?" She asks, intrigued.

"Your most perfect creation. I'm no scientist, I'm only an artist, but I think we all have something in common: we are always looking for perfection. It's probably something very human, actually. To have the certitude that we've lived and left behind us, for people to remember, a creation of our own that is perfect," Even explains, while keeping his eyes on Isak. "And there is nothing more perfect than him."

Beside him, Marianne frees one of her hands to wipe a tear sliding down her cheek. She's smiling though, and it doesn't sound like regret, on the contrary, when she adds, "and now he is his own creation, his own person."

"Like you and me," Even nods, smiling back at her.

"Thank you, Even. Thank you for everything."

Then Marianne stands on her tiptoes to hug him, a warm and grateful embrace. She doesn't linger after that, instead stepping away and leaving the balcony, only stopping on her way to kiss Isak on the cheek. After that, Isak decides to join him and Even opens his arms to invite him in.

"Is everything okay?" Isak asks, wrapping his arms around Even's waist while Even tucks him closer, trailing his hands up and down his back. It feels natural and comfortable, and it still amazes Even, even after weeks of being entirely and undeniably each other's.

"It's all good. We were just ranting about how incredible you are."

Isak rolls his eyes, but Even can tell he's turning crimson at the compliment.

"Are you having fun, sweetheart? Is everything like you wanted it to be?"

"Hm, hm," Isak nods, pressing his smile into Even's neck, and for the first time of the night, Even feels it.  _ He's truly happy _ , he realizes, and his stomach flips at the thought. No matter what people told him all night, it's the feeling of Isak grinning against his skin that finally does it for him. "What about you?" Isak asks, pulling back just enough for them to be able to look at each other.

Even moves a hand, cradling Isak's face into his palm and bringing their faces together. Their noses brush and their lips meet in a featherlight touch, subtle and gentle. 

"I love you," Even says as all answers to his question, but also as a reminder, just in case he didn't tell him enough today. It's still new to them, and Even isn't anywhere near bored of repeating it to his lover.

Thankfully, Isak doesn't seem bored of it either, judging by the way his body melts even more into Even's. And his words are barely more than a fond sigh when he responds against his lips, "I love you, always."

And Even believes him, more than he has ever believed anything or anyone before.

More than that, he feels it, everywhere. Always.

*

"Maybe I shouldn't come," Isak says for the hundredth time.

He's been walking around in circles all day long, too nervous to focus on anything else but the dilemma that has been weighing on his mind for weeks now. But Even had no idea, for Isak made sure not to mention it, only blaming his fretful behavior on the stress he felt on Even's behalf. It took multiple calls from their friends, first Eskild, then Sana, for Even to realize it was more than what Isak told him. Plus, the fact he's been busy most of the day with last minute recommendations from the studio didn't leave him much time to pause and try to figure out what was going on with Isak.

"Sweetheart, if you're not coming, I'm not going either," Even counters back, and as always, he means every word of it.

"You can't not go! It's your movie premiere! Even, you're the director, it's a big deal," Isak protests, making wide gestures with his arms, dramatic like a cartoon character. 

"Exactly. And you're my partner, so I want to live this event with you, otherwise I don't see the point at all. I want to watch a movie with you tonight, and if it won't be mine, then it can be another one, on our sofa, in our home."

Isak groans in frustration. He's standing half-naked in the middle of their bedroom, having stopped mid-way through getting dressed to try to convince Even he really doesn't need to intrude on his long-awaited movie premiere. 

Even, on the other hand, is all set already, in his black suit, white flannel, and hair styled the way he knows Isak loves. They picked their suits together a couple of weeks ago, when Isak wasn't having an internal system breakdown at the idea of having his first public appearance with Even on a red carpet just yet. Maybe he's been too distracted then by Even groping him in the dressing room because apparently, Isak wearing a dark green velvet suit is doing it to him. 

Afterwards, Isak has confessed he's been making plans to wear it as much as possible just to enjoy the sight of Even blushing and staring at him like he can't physically do otherwise. 

Now, though, it seems like Isak would give anything not to have to wear this suit.

"Are you worried about being under the spotlight? Isak, it won't be as big as in the movies. This is Oslo, not Hollywood. And all our friends are going to be there with you, it's gonna be fine," Even tries another approach. 

"I'm not worried about that," Isak sighs. 

"Then, what?" Even asks softly, taking Isak's hands into his.

Isak looks down at his feet, looking guilty and conflicted. "I'm sorry for making it so difficult for you," he mumbles. "You should be excited about the premiere, about finally showing the world the project you've been working on for months. It should be the only thing you have to care about, but no, I have to ruin it for you."

"You're not ruining anything!" Even can't help but exclaim, taken aback. Then he remembers he should keep it down and relaxed. He doesn't want Isak to think he's getting mad at him, because he's not. It's just one of those things Isak says sometimes, so insecure and demeaning, that makes him lose it. Isak is the most important thing in his life, and by so far, that even his movie premiere seems frivolous in comparison with pretty much anything else, no matter how hard he's worked on this project. "Tell me what's wrong. Why did you change your mind? What are you scared of?"

Isak is silent for a while, but Even knows it means he's searching for the right words, so he doesn't push him, and waits patiently.

Eventually, Isak looks up at him and explains, "If I'm coming with you to the premiere, then it means walking on the red carpet with you, standing next to you while you speak with journalists, and also, very likely, ruining your career by my presence there."

Even thought he had heard it all with Isak by now, but no, that one was new and not the least off-putting thing Isak ever said about himself, not by far.

"Ruining my- what are you talking about?!"

"Even," Isak loses patience, as if Even is acting difficult on purpose. "Don't tell me you didn't think about it."

"Think about what?! No, Isak, please tell me, because I have no idea what the problem is."

"I'm not the typical partner you bring on red carpets."

_ Oh _ . If Even is being honest, which he always tries and wants to be, especially when it comes to Isak, he's thought about it before. Of course he did. But he didn't think about his career, not even for a second. He was only worried about Isak, about people finding out about Isak's story, about their story, and being hurtful to him, the way people like Sonja have been in the past. But Isak never told him it was something he was worrying about, people's opinion, so Even decided it was best not to bring it up. More than anything, he wants Isak to see himself the way Even sees him: like a person, human or not, it doesn't matter.

"I'm not worried about my career," Even says then, sitting on the edge of the bed and pulling Isak with him so he's standing between his legs, hands still linked together. "If anything, I'm worried about you, about the way you think about yourself, and how you would feel if some jerks decided to come after you. But I'm not worried about me."

"Well, I am," Isak retorts stubbornly. "They can say whatever they want about me, I don't care. But I don't want you to suffer from me being not nor-"

"Don't even think about finishing it," Even stops him firmly. "We don't use the word 'normal' around here. Because what does it even mean? Don't you think some people consider me abnormal? I'm not straight, and I have a mental illness, how not normal do you think I am for narrow-minded people?"

"Sorry," Isak whispers and Even shakes his head. 

"Don't be. Just stop putting yourself down, will you? You're my favorite person in the world, and I have impeccable taste, thank you very much, so when you say bad things about you, you're basically insulting me," he ends with a small smile to lighten the mood.

Thankfully, it has the effect he was looking for: Isak breaks into a shy grin, and nods. "Okay. I won't. I will… I swear I'm trying to stop but sometimes, I just can't help it."

"I know, baby," Even sighs, wrapping his arms around Isak and then lying down on the bed with him, so every part of their bodies are touching. "It's not your fault. And I'm not mad. I'm never mad at you, okay?"

"Okay," Isak says, then leans to kiss Even's lips softly. "But what will you say if they ask? We can't even tell them how we met..."

Even starts carding his fingers through Isak's hair as he thinks about it. "We don't owe them any explanation, you know? And I don't even think they will ask anything tonight. It's about the movie, not my personal life. Sure, maybe they will try to find out who you are after… But you know what? I don't care. If they ask, I will say "he's the man of my life", and it will be the truth. If they learn about you, then be it, it's nothing to hide. You have nothing to be ashamed of, and neither do I. And don't worry about my career: I would rather not work than work with shitty people. I mean it."

Isak doesn't argue back this time, instead, nuzzles closer into his neck. "Fine." And then, "let's go, we are going to be late. You can't be late at your own movie premiere, Even!"

Even grins into Isak's curls, presses a quick peck on forehead before pulling back. "You're one to talk! Get dressed before I get other ideas, will you?" He winks at him, pulling away from him, and laughs when Isak rolls his eyes at him.

"Please, don't try to wink at the reporters. I told you before, you can't wink."

His phone starts ringing somewhere in the flat, probably someone from the studio, or Mikael, or Eskild, asking where they are and why they are getting late on the schedule. 

Even ignores it, and sits up to watch Isak fumble with his tie.

No matter what happens tonight, with his movie but also with Isak, Even knows the most important thing in his life can't be taken away from him. 

He feels serene.

*

It's crowded outside Colosseum Kino, much more than what Even has imagined or experienced in previous movie premieres he's been at before. The place is big enough as it is, with its large spherical dome, but seeing all these people scattered around the round building makes it even more impressive.

Beside him, Isak squeezes his hand a bit tighter as he looks through the car window. He was much more relaxed when they left their apartment, but now, he's growing tense again at the sight of the crowd waiting for them, as well as the dozens of reporters standing at the front row. Even leans in and kisses Isak on the cheek.

"It's going to be okay," he promises. 

Isak adverts his eyes from the outside world and meets his gaze. "I should be the one telling you that," he points out, a hint of guilt in his voice.

"Nonsense. I'm fine."

"Obviously," Isak mutters, his expression inscrutable for a while. He moves, using his free hand to cradle Even's face, his fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck, and leans until their noses are brushing together. "I'm so proud of you," he whispers, and Even is left speechless.

"Ugh," someone interrupts their moment. They both turn in Mikael's direction, who's glaring at them in annoyance. "It's not enough that we had to wait half an hour for your lazy, horny asses, but now I have to sit through your sappy bullshit? Can you pay some respect to single, lonely me, please?!"

Isak can't hold back a laugh and Mikael shoots him a dirty look before crossing his arms on his chest and starting to pout like a kid. Isak pats him on the knee, probably half in apology and half in comfort.

"I have to agree with Mikael," Eskild says and Even arches an eyebrow at him. Now that doesn't sound like him at all. "You can't be the cutest lovebirds in front of the camera, or you're going to steal the spotlight away from me! Look at me! I'm too splendid to be left in the back!"  _ Ah.  _ Now it sounds very much like him.

"There is no way you will end up in the back, Eskild," Even snorts, and not only because Eskild is looking particularly extravagant in his sparkling, colorful suit, but also because there is no way Eskild won't sprint straight in front of the reporters as soon as they get out of the car.

"You look stunning, they will only have eyes for you," Isak adds with a kind smile, and Eskild winks at him in return.

"Thank you, baby robot. You're very handsome yourself."

Even remembers, months ago, how jealous he got of Isak's and Eskild's easy complicity. It's not something he's proud of and likes to think about, but he knows it belongs to the past. For tonight, he feels warm inside when he looks at and listens to them compliment each other, on the edge of flirting, but when it comes to them, Even knows this is nothing but affectionate friendship. 

And actually, it could be Isak talking with anyone else, Even wouldn't feel threatened or insecure anymore. He loves Isak, and he knows Isak loves him back, so there is no room left for doubt. 

"Alright boys, they are waving at us. It's our turn," Mikael announces.

Eskild is the first to get out of their uber, screaming at the crowd "good evening, Oslo! It's good to see you!" and then, just like Even predicted, he makes a beeline for the reporters. Mikael follows shortly after, waving enthusiastically at the crowd before walking towards a bunch of people to talk with them.

"Ready?" Even asks, kissing Isak on the top of his nose to make him smile, and it works.

Isak nods. "But don't let go of my hand."

"I would never."

Their hands clapped together, they get out of the car and walk slowly on the modest red carpet. Already near the entrance, since they arrived before they did, Even notices Elias, who snaps his fingers at him in a silent "you looking good", next to Anders, his second main actor, alongside Eskild. He's much more reserved than his co-actor, and less famous, too, at least for now, but Even has a good feeling about him. After all, he didn't cast him for nothing. 

"Even Bech Naesheim!" Someone calls for him.

Even looks around him until he realizes he's been called by a journalist, who's holding a mic and standing in front of his cameraman, waiting for him expectantly to interview him.

"I got this," Even whispers to Isak, grinning at him, hoping to share with him his confidence.

Speaking to reporters isn't something Even is afraid of. Promotion is not his favorite part of making movies, far from it, but he knows he's quite good at it, it comes easy on him, so he doesn't really mind. Mikael keeps saying he knows how to wrap people - mostly journalists - around his finger with just a few words and his bright smile. Eskild is a bit more straightforward about it, as always, "look at you! They see you and want to bang you! Plus, you're a natural flirt". Sonja, back in the day, hated seeing him in his sweet-talking role, which is why he can't remember the last time she bothered to come with him to any promotional event. Not that he really cared if she didn't, on the contrary.

Tonight, though, he can't picture himself without Isak by his side, holding his hand. It feels right, like Isak belongs among the movie crew as much as any of the others. 

"Good evening, Even! How are you doing?" The young journalist greets him, then nods at Isak with a polite smile. Even decides he's decent enough so he can talk to him for a few minutes.

Even brushes his thumb gently on Isak's hand ("are you alright?"), and once Isak squeezes his hand back in response ("it's all good"), Even puts on his promoting director's face and beams at the guy.

"I'm doing great, thank you! What about you?"

"Well, better now that you are here, obviously!" Even forces a laugh and the reporter waves quickly at his cameraman. "Even Bech Naesheim, tell us a bit about your movie. It seems to be an UFO in the movie industry right now, which isn't necessarily a bad thing because we are getting used to your unusual and creative cinematography. But science fiction isn't exactly your area, and no one knows if it's going to be like the new Star Wars or some cliché nerd movie. As far as we know, it seems to be an action movie set in space, sure, but also a cosmic love story between a space traveller and an alien. Your art is usually very personal, so I can't help but wonder, what does it mean to you?"

"This movie means a lot to me, obviously, but even more so the message behind it. You said it, it's an action movie but also a cosmic love story between a space traveller and an alien. It sounds like a cliché nerd movie, I will give you that. But think about the meaning behind it," Even pauses and the reporter nods at him. He's listening. It's good. "The odds are against them, time and space are against them, but still, our hero won't give up. He's ready to travel through multiple universes to be reunited with the one he loves. He doesn't care about their differences or what people will think and say about them. And I think it's something we should all apply in our lives."

"It does seem to hold a beautiful message," the guy says to keep him going.

"Yes, and the thing is, the message didn't mean as much to me at first. The project is born from my need to reinvent myself and to challenge myself. So, I took something I knew very well, romance, and I mixed it with things I was much less familiar with, science-fiction and action. I wanted to surprise myself, but mostly, to surprise people. Funny enough, when I started this project, I cared more about what people would think than what I really wanted to create." Even pauses again, but this time, instead of checking on the reporter for some kind of approval, he glances at Isak and smiles at him softly. His beautiful boy, who's looking back at him with so much fondness in his sweet, green eyes. When he goes on with his explanations, he makes sure to keep his eyes on Isak. And for a while, it's just the two of them: no reporter, no camera, no red carpet and no excited crowd. "But then, the unexpected stumbled into my life and this project took a very different turn for me. I forgot all about appearances, about fame, about the movie industry and about society. All I cared about was to tell these characters' story in a honest and vulnerable way, to open people's eyes to something I learnt off-camera, in my personal life, during those months of filming: that every love story is a universal love story, because love knows no differences, it is felt, and shared, and nothing else. And for that, you shouldn't judge love."

Isak's eyes are shining with tears and love, and Even is pretty sure he's not doing any better. Even is dying to grab his face and kiss him long and deep, right then and there, but it would probably be too much, even for them. He's already turned an interview about the meaning of his movie into a love declaration to his partner, no need to add more to it. 

"Well, I'm glad I brought my Kleenex tonight, I think I'm going to need it," the reporter brings them back to reality. Reluctantly, Even looks back at him. "I'm glad to see you are in such good company. Thank you so much for your time, Even."

Even holds back a laugh. "Thank you, have a good night."

As soon as they walk away, more reporters call after him. But Even takes the time to check on Isak, to make sure it wasn't too much. They were probably supposed to lay low and not make it about them, but Even was nothing but honest: this is what the movie means to him, and Isak became a part of it, whether he wants it or not.

Thankfully, Isak is smiling at him, full of love and support. "You couldn't help it, could you? You're not making sappy movies for nothing," he says, rolling his eyes at him fondly.

"But you wouldn't have it any other way, right?"

"No. I wouldn't," Isak admits, a steady confession, just for the two of them in the middle of the chaos of the premiere.

And then, Isak is actually the one walking towards the next reporter, pulling Even with him, all fear and apprehension gone.

*

The movie is a success, judging by how people stand up and clap their hands for long minutes at the end of the projection, and then, by how active and enthusiastic they are when the time comes for the exchanges on the movie. Time flies though, and before Even will really have the opportunity to register it's over, the movie is out and apart from a few promotional appearances on TV or radio that Eskild will be more than happy to deal with most of the time, his work on this project is coming to an end. 

Once they leave Colosseum Kino, all the movie crew heads for the same place: their usual afterwork bar. The studio was more than willing to rent a fancier bar or restaurant for them to celebrate, but they all agreed on the fact they didn't need anything better. It feels like the perfect place to make their farewells - or, until next time, perhaps.

For a while, Even has fun, and so does Isak, who befriended most of Even's friends by now, and if not, gets along with his crew more than well. 

Eskild gets drunk, which isn't a surprise, and spends half the night hitting on Anders since "it's not unprofessional of me anymore, we are no longer co-workers!" but Anders seems pretty into the attention, so in the end, it's mostly funny to hear Eskild try to justify himself to everybody while his movie partner is waiting for him to shut up and kiss him already.

Sana and Yousef obviously came to the projection to support Elias, Even and the rest of the team, and so Elias makes a show of it, ranting and bragging about his part in the project. Seemingly feeling charitable, Sana listens to him, only rolling her eyes at her brother from time to time, until Elias finds another victim and Sana can talk in peace with Eva, Vilde and Linn.

Even and Isak spend a good hour talking with Mikael and Jonas, until Isak asks him to dance, right in the middle of a whole debate about politically-motivated films, mostly between Mikael and Jonas, who were exchanging passionate arguments Even can't keep up with despite his minimum knowledge on the subject. At first, Even figures Isak was getting bored of their movie-nerd talk, so he doesn't hesitate to take his hand and make him dance as much as he wants, but later, when they are getting to leave, Even catches a glimpse of Mikael and Jonas making out on a sofa.  _ My genius _ , Even thinks, looking back at Isak who's busy hugging Eskild goodbye. 

People try to make them stay longer but Isak seems to grow tired of all the attention, and Even doesn't feel like it either, would rather celebrate the rest of the night with Isak, just the two of them in the safety of their home. He's never been very keen on saying goodbyes, and tonight feels too much like the end of an era, which technically is true, but they also all work in the same industry, and Even is confident they will be reunited on the same project again in the future.

Their apartment is only a 30 minute walk away so they decide to walk home, hand in hand, taking advantage of the mild weather and clear skies. It's difficult to see the stars while being in the middle of the city, but not impossible, and they spend most of the trip stargazing and then planning their next expedition into the countryside so that Isak can get a better view.

"Maybe we could rent a cabin and spend a week in the middle of nowhere," Even suggests.

"Make it two weeks," Isak replies.

Even loves the sound of it.

At home, they help each other undress - slowly, all while speaking to one another, not even in a sexual way, which Even finds almost as pleasant as when they almost rip their clothes off in the urge to get each other naked. When Even struggles with his shoelaces, Isak gets down and unties them himself, grinning at him from below. When they reach the bedroom and Isak sits on the edge of their bed to get rid of his pants, Even is the one who kneels and pulls at the item to free him.

Soon, they are lying in bed in their underwear, and staring at each other's faces, fingers carding through locks of hair, stroking cheekbones or dancing on naked shoulders, rubbing soothing patterns on their backs.

"Did you have a nice time?" Isak asks as he runs his fingertips on the edge of Even's nose, his voice barely a whisper even in the almost religious silence of their bedroom.

"Yes, a very nice time," Even nods, finally taking in all the events of the night, but not only. Everything has been a wild ride, but it's been worth it, even if now the time has come to draw the curtain.

"Good," Isak murmurs before cuddling closer to him, tucking himself into Even's arms. "What do you think is going to happen now?"

"What do you mean?"

Isak doesn't add anything else, but Even thinks he knows. They spent their night in a safe bubble, but now that they've been together out in the open, the truth about their relationship can get revealed at any moment. It can happen tomorrow, or in six months, or not before a couple of years, who knows, but it will, eventually. The question is, what are they going to do about it?

But the thing is, Even has an idea. He's had one for quite a while actually.

"I have an idea for my next movie," Even states, and as he says it, he realizes it's not so much of an idea anymore but a project. He's sure of himself. He's determined to do it, as long as Isak is on board, too.

"Really?" Isak pulls back to look him in the eye. "What is it?"

Even trails his fingers up and down Isak's arm, searching for his next words carefully. "It's a love story."

"Of course it is," Isak snorts playfully.

Even smiles. "It's a love story,  _ obviously _ . But an unusual one."

"More unusual than a time traveller and an alien?" Isak teases him. It's a good point. Or is it?

"More. Because when people see them together, they see a living, breathing creature called a human being, and then someone who looks the same as them but is told to be different. He's a mystery, something they don't know and don't understand yet."

Isak looks particularly intrigued now, leaning on his elbow to hover over Even. "What is he?"

"He's a revolutionary technology, the uninitiated call it a robot, the specialists an AI; but our human being, he thinks he's the most beautiful soul he's ever met."

"Even," Isak breathes, stunned. "What are you-"

"I want to make a movie about you. About us. I want to tell your story, our story, so people see how incredible you are, how worthy and important you are, as much as them, if not more. I want to show them you deserve more than the way you've been treated in the past and you deserve a future where you don't have to fight for yourself, to justify yourself. I want us to have control over what we want to say, how to say it, and when. This movie, it would be our story to tell, it would be ours and ours only."

Isak opens and closes his mouth a few times, speechless, his thoughts probably running wild inside his pretty head. But Even is convinced this is the right solution. Isak is already trying to change the world by fixing the wrongs Valtersen Inc. did in the past, and by making sure he, as well as the others just like him, don't suffer no more, and find their place in society. Meanwhile, what is Even doing? Nothing.

_ Yet _ . But Even is an artist, he makes movies and believes they can change people's minds. So if that's all the power he has between his hands, then he's going to use it how he knows best to try to make things right, too.

"Okay," Isak says finally, and it's so short and sudden that Even almost misses it, lost in his thoughts.

"What?"

Isak smiles kindly at him, lying down again by his side. "I said okay. I think it's a great idea, and I know if anyone can make a difference, it's you."

"You- Are you sure?!" Honestly, Even was expecting Isak to show more reluctance than this.

"Baby," Isak cups his face gently. "You're so talented, so brilliant, I swear it's like you're making magic out of your movies. I wouldn't be who I am today without them. Through them, you showed me what love is, and how I could teach myself how to love, too. I have no doubt you will do the same for other people, successfully. And if not, they are the problem. Not us, not you, not me."

Even hears himself choke out a strangled laugh, halfway through a sob. Now he's the one being completely caught out and overwhelmed.

"I don't even know what to say," Even admits, and Isak chuckles, wiping a tear away with his thumb. Why is he getting so emotional all of sudden?! 

Let's say it's been a long night. 

"That's okay. You don't need to say anything."

"But I do, though. It's important."

"Hm?"

"I'm so in love with you," Even makes sure to mark every word, to make them count. "Don't you ever forget how much I love you." 

"That's sappy," Isak jokes, but Even can tell he's trying to fight back his emotions too. They kiss, slow and gentle. "I love you, too. I love you more every day." And Even knows it to be true, because Isak keeps learning more and more every day, and it also means he's falling more and more in love with him every passing day.

And Even also knows it doesn't work that way with humans, but in his heart, he feels more and more for Isak, too, and maybe this is something Even has learnt from him.

It's a good thing he's ready for an entire life of learning and loving with Isak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I'm typing these words, I'm starting to fully realize this is the last chapter of this fic...  
> DAMN. One epilogue left and then we will have to say goodbye :(
> 
> But before I get all sad, tell me what you thought of this solo Even POV chapter?  
> I feel like I should apologize for how sappy it was, but I also promised to make it up to you for the angst so...  
> You asked for it, I guess :') 
> 
> See you soon for the epilogue. Thank you for everything, really. <3


	18. jeg har valgt deg nå (I've chosen you now)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Big decisions need to be made. New possibilities arise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's time to say goodbye... ❤️

_A_ _few years later_

As a filmmaker, Even would have never imagined that he would one day find himself inside the Parliament, surrounded by golden walls, remnants of another time, and in the presence of the Norwegian deputies. Isak is sitting by his side, focused solely on Marianne who's currently giving a speech in front of the MPs. Even knows Isak is listening to every word of it although he knows the speech by heart, having spent hours helping Marianne to practice.

"... we created something bigger than us and today I'm here to ask you to make things right…"

To be honest Even is too anxious to show the same attention as his partner, even though Marianne's words are worth listening to - and he hopes that the men and women around him don't miss a second of her speech, contrary to him. But he's been waiting for such an opportunity for so long - years, ever since his movie came out - that he's having a hard time believing this is happening.

Almost three years ago, Even did exactly what he had told Isak he would do: he got financing, he put a team together, and then he spent months working on the movie of his life, of their lives, from the beginning to the end, from the second they met in Even's and Sonja's apartment to the decisive moment Even told Isak he would tell the world about their love story. It didn't have a proper ending, for they were all working on it still, but today is another step towards the happy ending they are hoping for.

"I know that what I am asking you to do goes beyond reason, beyond what you are used to thinking, but I ask you to consider the matter seriously, if only for a few seconds. They are, in many ways, our fellow citizens. They are different, I cannot deny that, but have we not learned throughout history that individual differences should not be used as a justification for systemic injustices, for unequal treatment?"

Out of instinct, he grabs Isak's hand and squeezes it gently. Beside him, Isak looks away from Marianne for the first time in long minutes and meets Even's eyes as his hand comes to cover Even's, brushing his thumb on the top of it in comfort. 

As always, Isak looks stunning inside his dark blue formal suit. Years ago, Isak said he would start wearing suits just to make Even blush. And if Isak in such an outfit never stopped having a devastating effect on Even, this isn't the reason why Isak has been wearing suits for a couple of years now: he's been doing so ever since he became one of the main cornerstones of Valtersen Inc, alongside Sana. He is and he looks respected. He also looks a bit older, an artificial manipulation meant to follow Even's natural aging process as well.

"Okay?" Isak whispers to him and Even forces himself to smile as he nods in response. They are together, and no matter what the reactions will be, they will remain together. No one can separate them. Isak seems to agree, for he kisses the top of his hand before turning his attention back on Marianne, keeping their hands linked together on his thigh.

"In a moment, my brilliant colleague Sana Bakkoush Acar will provide you with all the scientific arguments demonstrating the need for such a law, but before that, I would like you to pause and think. I would like you to seek within yourself the empathy and the open-mindedness that I firmly believe you possess, and to direct those virtues towards those who need them today more than ever, so you understand them and you consider them rightly, equally and fairly."

In many ways, Even's movie has been a success. To be more exact, it's been the greatest success of his career, acclaimed by audiences and critics alike. But Even isn't naive, he knows the reason why so many people rushed to the theatres to watch it wasn't entirely for his art. During the shooting, rumors started to spread about "the mysterious identity of the rising Norwegian star's boyfriend". It happened around the time Valtersen Inc, and especially Terje Valtersen, started to get in trouble for lying about the true nature of the "products" being sold. Even hated how, at the time, people still called Isak's kind "products" or "goods", but thankfully, it's gotten a bit better by now, and today could really make a major difference.

Long story short, people found out about Isak's nature. For a few months, life has been for the least… exhausting. They called Even a freak, a pervert, a sick man. They called Isak a worthless piece of trash, an abomination, and even more absurd, the future responsible for the destruction of humanity. They both decided to take some time away from Oslo, for safety and peace, while Even tried to stay focused on the movie, tried to convince himself it would be all worth it once he could show the world how wrong they were about them.

Right at the beginning of the scandal, Valtersen Inc's board got rid of Terje for good and asked Marianne to speak up for them, which she was really good at. The company also published papers and shared their findings with other research centers all around the world to have other well-known scientists back them up, with Sana as the leader on the subject. Isak kept working at Valtersen Inc and easily convinced their colleagues that he wasn't just a machine humans could use at their mercy, that he had feelings and emotions and he deserved to be respected. And as Isak likes to remind Even, maybe his movie, too, widely participated in changing the citizens' mind regarding robots. 

Which, eventually, led them all to the Parliament today, to Marianne and Sana speaking in favor of the creation of a status for Isak's kind, arguing on behalf of the AI's rights, in order to grant them the freedom they deserve.

"Thank you very much for your time. I will now make way for our Director of Research and Development, Sana Bakkoush Acar," Marianne ends her intervention, stepping away to let Sana take her spot at the lectern.

"Hello everyone," Sana greets the deputies, looking perfectly unimpressed. On the contrary, watching her from their seats, she looks like the most powerful person in the room. "Dear Members of our highly respected Norwegian Parliament…" She pauses, forcing them all to hold their breath and wait for her next words, keeping them on the edge. "I hope you are ready to make History because I believe we are late enough as it is. But you know… Better late than never."

Even snorts, and next to him, he can see from the corner of his eye that Isak is biting on his lower lip to hold back a smile. 

For a few seconds, the MPs are whispering between them, probably taken aback by Sana's boldness, but awake and attentive at least, and as soon as Sana clears her throat to speak again, they all go silent.

Maybe, Even thinks with amusement, Sana should consider a political career next.

***

Isak has been nervous for the past few weeks, ever since Marianne and Sana got the invitation to speak in front of the Parliament in favor of AI's rights, in the hopes to get a law passed that will finally grant him and others like him some freedom as persons. And, depending on how it will all go down after this day, maybe even more than he allows himself to hope for.

But, to be quite frank, Isak is too scared to be optimistic.

This could just as well go very badly for them. He knows that many of the men and women around him still think the worst about his kind and that some of them will do anything to prevent any laws in favor of AIs to be passed. In fact, some of them might even go so far as to pass a law preventing his kind to do anything or to destroy them.

Isak shutters at the thought and squeezes Even's hand hard before refocusing on Sana and her speech. It's a good speech and Sana delivers it outstandingly. Isak is rather proud of her and mouths some of the words as she says them out loud.

They have worked together on this speech for the last two weeks, gathering all the facts, numbers, statistics, and all of that. It has been a rather dry, factual matter - until Even and Yousef barged into Sana's office one afternoon to surprise them. Yousef bringing coffee and their little baby daughter, Even distracting Isak with kisses. Once Yousef got his hands on the speech, he started to make disapproving noises. He parked little Farrah on Isak's lap and beckoned Even to join him behind Sana's desk. Several hours later, Farrah was asleep on Isak's chest and their speech was ready - a perfect mix of facts and emotions.

And while Isak didn't usually think that mixing his job and emotions was a good idea, it was probably the right call for this speech… because if they had kept it like Sana and he had written it, probably half of the MPs would be snoring by now.

As it is, everyone is sitting on the edge of their chairs, completely under Sana's spell, and listening to her every word.

When she ends her speech with "I ask you to think and discuss this matter not only with your brains but mostly with your hearts. AIs are thinking, feeling beings with worries, hopes and needs just like us. In fact, I believe that they are extraordinary and that some of them are more human than many actual humans. There is no, absolutely none, reason to not grant them the rights we demand for them. Thank you very much for your attention, ladies and gentlemen", there's absolute silence in the hall.

Isak isn't sure how to interpret this - is it good, is it bad, is everyone just too overwhelmed to react? - but he doesn't want to let his insecurities get to him right now. Nothing will be decided for a long time since politics work very slowly. And what's the use in stressing over this now when he won't hear anything about it for the next months or possibly even years? 

"You wanna go outside?" Even asks, claiming his attention by putting his free hand on Isak's chin and slowly turning his face towards him. A soft smile is playing around his lips and Isak can't resist leaning forward to get a taste of it. Even just smiles even harder afterwards. "We can wait for Marianne and Sana there?!"

"Yeah, let's do that," Isak replies and gets up from his chair, pulling Even up with him.

Once they are outside, Isak finds them a quiet corner where he can lean against Even and hide his face in the man's chest for a moment. When he looks up again to smile at his boyfriend, his fingers are already threading through the long hair.

After a while, Isak takes Even's face between his hands, his thumbs stroking Even's cheekbones carefully. He would never get enough of this face; it's his favorite thing in the whole world. And he can still not understand why Even has become so insecure about it several years ago.

Isak still remembers the day he found Even in their bathroom inspecting his face in the mirror, dissatisfaction written all over his features. When Isak asked what was wrong, Even just pointed to a wrinkle underneath his eyes. With a frown, Isak walked up to him and let his finger smooth over the wrinkle. "And what about it?" He remembers asking Even. "You're still the most beautiful human being I have ever seen."

Eventually, during breakfast, Even had finally admitted that he was scared of getting older, especially starting to look old, when Isak would remain forever young. He admitted that he was thinking that Isak wouldn't like him anymore if he didn't look as young and beautiful as he did when they met. Isak had called bullshit on him. But he knew he had to take Even's insecurities and fears seriously because otherwise they would eat him up and might ruin the perfect relationship they had. So, when he arrived at Valtersen Inc that day he immediately got to work on an upgrade for his physical appearance.

Now, his appearance would change in time with Even's aging process and there was no more reason for his partner to be ashamed or insecure about his wrinkles.

In fact, Isak likes to map the changes on Even's face - like the little scar just below his left ear that he got from a car accident they had two years ago. It reminds him of all the years they have spent together and the things they have lived through together, the good and the bad.

And there have been plenty of both for them. Isak will never forget all the shit that has happened to him after the public found out about him during the shooting of Even's movie or how helpless he felt when he witnessed Even having an episode for the first time (he got better at helping him during the second, third, and fourth time) or said car accident that had him sitting by Even's hospital bed for days. But he remembers the good things just as well; the birth of Yousef and Sana's daughter, the day Even's movie came out, and their holidays all over Norway (and Isak cannot wait for them to go abroad when all of this will go well and they'll finally be able to). And also just little things like waking up to Even every morning and seeing his sleepy face or watching him eat his dinner after a long day spent apart from each other.

Isak loves their life together and he knows no one will be able to take that away from them, yet thinking about the decision to come he is scared of what it might mean for them and their future together.

"Hey," Even whispers, his nose rubbing against Isak's to catch his attention. "What's up? What are you thinking about, sweetheart? Is it the speech, do you want to talk about it?"

Isak gives him a small smile and shakes his head. "No, I was actually thinking about you, how beautiful you are, and how much I love your pretty face."

Even blushes heavily and Isak laughs happily while kissing Even's flushed cheeks. "I love you," he whispers against his ear but then he gets serious again, unable to stop the thoughts on the impactful decisions ahead from flooding his mind. "And I love our life together. I don't want them to take that away from us, ever."

"They can't take that away from us, Isak. I don't care what these goddamn politicians will decide. We are us and they'll never be able to take that away." Even sounds determined while he is now the one to take Isak's face between his hands, making sure to get his point across to his boyfriend. "Okay?"

Isak sighs but nods and before he can say anything else, Marianne and Sana walk towards them. "Hello, boys," Sana says to announce their arrival.

Reluctantly, Isak lets go of Even and turns towards the women. He steps up to Marianne and hugs her tightly. "You did great," he assures her, placing a kiss on top of her head. Then he looks at Sana and smiles. "And so did you."

Sana just rolls her eyes at him with a smile. "You're an idiot," she mouths and turns towards Even to start a conversation with him.

But before anyone can say anything else, a man walks up to them and all four of them look at him with big eyes. He looks way too cool in his fitted black suit and yet, he projects the attitude of someone important who has a lot of confidence and willpower. Isak thinks it's the kind of attitude you need when you're one of the very few black persons in the Parliament.

However, when he steps up to them, he gives them a genuine smile. "Hello, my name is Mahdi Disi," he introduces himself, shaking first Sana's and Marianne's hand and then also Isak's and Even's. His eyes linger on Isak for a while before he looks back to the women again. "I'm a representative of the _Venstre_ and I would very much like to thank both of you for your amazing speeches. I was very impressed with both, the content and the way you spoke. Thank you very much for being here today."

"Thanks," Sana replies with a shrug while Marianne smiles warmly at the man, thanking him and shaking his hand another time.

They talk for a while about the speech and other aspects of the matter that neither Marianne nor Sana have addressed but Mahdi thinks are important to take into consideration, especially if they want to convince the government of their arguments.

After giving his business card to Marianne, Mahdi turns towards Isak with a big smile. "I will support you," he says, putting his hand on Isak's shoulder and patting it. "I cannot believe that we're still discussing this. That we, once again, have to fight for the rights of a minority. It's like people have learned absolutely nothing from history." Isak wants to apologize on the behalf of humans and for not being educated enough on the matter when he knows he should be but Mahdi wastes no time. "Anyway… I'm with you, man," he says with a wink and also hands Isak a business card. "See you around."

And with that, he takes his briefcase and disappears in the direction of the next tram stop.

Isak gapes after him in disbelief.

He isn't quite sure if this actually has just happened or if he is dreaming or something. It is hard to believe for him.

After all, a quick research has shown him that Mahdi Disi is a well-respected and highly-ranked member of the parliament and actually, contrary to his statement that he is just a member, the leader of the _Venstre_ party. Having someone like him support their cause, could make such a big difference and would put them in a much better position than before.

With a sigh, Isak leans against Even again, trying to process everything that has happened today.

It might take him some time.

But at least he feels a little less anxious and more hopeful now than ever before. Maybe the future is closer than he thought it is, and maybe it will be brighter than he can imagine.

***

For the longest time, it has never been more than a naive thought, a fanciful idea; something that belonged more to daydream than to reality. But then, this highly respected representative, Mahdi Disi, spoke words he didn't think he would hear from someone like him anytime soon (" _I will support you"_ ), and with that, he turned his chimerical fantasy into a real possibility for Isak, for Even, and for them both together.

This morning Even woke up with only wishful thinking and now he comes home with, admittedly, no certainty, but still a chance, something he could be looking for in the future, and it's more than what he has allowed himself to hope for so far.

"Sorry for the mess, I will clean it up," Isak speaks, snapping him out of his thoughts. 

By the time he comes back to his senses, Isak is already on his knees, stacking the books that were scattered all over the coffee table of the living room with one hand, while trying to organize his many written notes in the right order with the other hand. Isak's desk is buried under even more books and paperwork, which is why he moved into the living room early this morning to work before their meeting at the Parliament.

In the past few months, Isak has been studying Law. He wanted to understand and participate in the legal procedures and remedies that he and Valtersen Inc want to undertake to obtain recognition of the existence of AIs such as him under the law, and more importantly, to assert their identity beyond a deed of property, which they are still subject to, unfortunately, to this day. 

It has already been years since Sana made sure that Sonja no longer had any legal rights over Isak, only Even, because someone had to. And Even has felt awful about it, although Isak has told him a thousand times that he knew he didn't consider him neither as an object nor as his property, but even so, if there were to be a contract between them, it isn't the kind of contract Even would ever want. To begin with, he would like it to be a choice, not an obligation. Then, it should be a mutual commitment, not a one-way deal. And above all, it would need to be an equal engagement, without any sort of dynamic of dominance.

For humans, Even knows such a contract has a specific name. It's been on his mind for quite a while now, as part of one of his unspoken wishes, but he never dared to seriously consider it until today, until it became an actual eventuality.

"Is everything alright?" Isak asks from his spot on the floor. When their eyes meet, Isak is smiling kindly at him, although Even knows he has noticed how lost in thought Even has been ever since they left the Parliament. Isak, being the patient soul that he is though, won't push him to speak unless Even wants to.

"Yes, of course, I was just…" Even pauses when he realizes he's still holding in his hand the coat he's taken off a few minutes ago when they walked inside their apartment together. Quickly, Even discards it on the coat rack, takes off his shoes, and joins Isak, who is still looking at him with gentle, careful eyes, following his every move.

Even knees by his side and grabs his hands to make him let go of the bunch of books he was holding. "Just leave it here," he whispers, then leans to kiss Isak's forehead. "It's alright." But Even can hear how off and slightly wobbly his own voice sounds to him, so to Isak, it must be impossible to ignore.

Still, Isak nods and only frees his right hand to reach out and tuck Even's lock of hair behind his ear. His hair is longer than when they first met, so he can tie them in a bun, and much longer than Isak's, who's trying something shorter lately. Even didn't know Isak could get any hotter but it seems like Isak will never stop surprising him - in the best way.

"It was a lot, hm?" Isak says and Even can tell he's not only saying it to make him talk. It must have been an equally stressful and unsettling moment for Isak as it was for Even, if not more so, considering this is about Isak's future as an individual first and foremost. 

So Even trails his hand up and down Isak's back, the way he knows it works wonders to soothe Isak's nerves. "It was. How do you feel about it?"

"I'm trying to be… rational about it. Factual."

"Of course," Even replies with a wry smile. "But still, what do you feel?"

"I'm feeling hopeful," Isak says, and Even can see he's telling the truth, but there is also something else he isn't telling him, something that seems to bother him - to worry him, even.

"Me too." Even steals Isak's hand again but this time it's to press a gentle kiss on his knuckles. "What else?"

"I can tell something is on your mind and I'm trying not to overthink what it could be," Isak admits, looking down for a brief moment before forcing himself to support Even's gaze on him. This is one of the things Even is the proudest of when it comes to Isak: how he doesn't shy away from shame or embarrassment or any other emotion people told him in the past he wasn't allowed to feel or show or else he would make Even run away from him. Now he allows himself to not only feel them but to show them as well, unapologetically. 

"What do you think is on my mind?"

"I'm not sure, I have many theories." Of course, he does. "But one of them I really don't like the thought of."

"Which is?"

"What if you're starting to realize it's going to be a long and exhausting fight and we might lose it in the end. What if you're starting to doubt and… And I wouldn't blame you for it, I promise, but what if you're starting to think, _is it all really worth it?_ , you know?"

Even frowns. He is, in fact, not sure he knows. "What wouldn't be worth it? You getting the same rights as me? As any other human?" 

"No." Isak tangles his fingers into the soft hair at the back of Even's neck and that's another thing Even adores about him, about them. How whenever they are heading into a serious and potentially uncomfortable conversation, they still make sure to touch and hold each other through it. "Being with me, with everything that entails. With someone who's considered as less than a person and who will never be able to give you as much as an actual person."

"You're a person," Even retorts immediately. Over the years, Isak's self-esteem and self-confidence have improved considerably. It's actually been months, maybe years since he's heard Isak talk about himself in such a depreciative manner, and he obviously doesn't like it, but above all, he doesn't _understand_ it. "Honestly, I don't see what you can't give me. And since when are we thinking in terms of giving anything to anyone anyway?"

Isak sighs and finally admits, "I'm talking about a family, about having children. Just like Sana and Yousef. Or like… most couples do." 

_Ah_. "Most heterosexual couples, you mean. Which wouldn't be an option for us even if you were a 'human male individual' as you like to call it." Isak opens his mouth to speak but Even isn't quite done. "And before you tell me I could be with a woman, let me tell you something: I never wanted children. All I've ever wanted is to do what I love - which is making movies - and to be with someone I love - and I am with you, and I've never loved anyone as much as I love you. So it seems to me it's a non-issue." 

Isak starts pouting, stubborn as he is, but he's also turning into a lovely blushing mess, and Even can't help but chuckle at his conflicted state. However, everything he said, he means it, and Isak needs to hear it, to understand it, and to never forget it. Ever since Sana's and Yousef's daughter was born, he knew Isak was thinking about Marianne and how much she suffered from not being able to raise her own child. But he had no idea Isak's mind had projected her personal dream on Even - which was a mistake.

"Sweetheart, do you want to know what's really on my mind?" Even asks, bringing their faces so close to one another that their noses are brushing and the space between their mouths is made of their shared breath. "I wasn't thinking about what we couldn't have together, on the contrary." Isak looks surprised, but pleasantly so. "I was thinking about the possibilities, no matter how small they are at this point. I was thinking about…"

Even doesn't finish his sentence and Isak pulls back the slightest bit to study his face, confused at his abrupt pause. 

"About…?"

Even smiles, presses a quick but firm kiss on his lips before getting up and rushing to their shared office. 

"Baby?" Isak calls after him, and as Even rummages through his desk drawers, Isak follows him into the office. "What are you doing?"

When, finally, Even puts a hand on it, he turns around to face the love of his life, a bright smile on his lips, the precious piece of paper between his hands. At the sight, Isak stops his walk, confusion and curiosity blending on his beautiful face.

Even takes one last deep breath, and then, before he has time to feel nervous, he opens his heart to Isak.

"I don't know when and if it's ever going to be possible for us, but if there is the slightest chance for it to happen, then I can promise you, Isak, my love, I have every intention of proposing to you, and then, if you let me, of marrying you." 

***

Isak hasn't been close to having a system breakdown in forever as he has learned everything about emotions in the past years and has mastered every possible situation humans could put him into.

Or well... apparently not _every_ possibility.

But, in his defense, he would've never thought this could even be a possibility, that anyone would ever tell him something like this, making him a promise like that. Actually, he still can't believe this is happening right now.

Which is probably exactly why he is closer to a system breakdown than ever before.

He is hyperventilating, which isn't actually part of his system breakdown but rather a sign his system sends automatically to show humans he is in distress. His warning signals are all over the place and Isak thinks he can actually _hear_ his CPU processing all the information.

"Isak? Sweetheart?"

Even walks towards him, obviously trying to calm his nerves but Isak isn't ready for that, he needs to process the information first. So, he takes a step back and tries to focus on one aspect at a time.

He closes his eyes and recalls Even's words. Even said that he doesn't know if and when it will be possible for them. Fact - because it will all depend on the decision the Parliament will have to take eventually. Then he said if there is the slightest chance of it happening, he promises to do it. And yes, there is always a chance and the chance for this happening might be bigger than they think. Even's next words were that he had every intention of proposing to him.

Okay, yeah… so, Even wants to propose to him.

Cool.

No wonder he is about to have a fucking system breakdown!

But, at least, after taking his time to process and analyze Even's words bit by bit, he is calmer again and the warning signals slowly disappear. Instead, as the factuality of it all sinks in, Isak starts to smile widely and a blush is spreading over his cheeks and all the way down to his neck.

"Do you mean it?" He asks as he opens his eyes again and now steps forward until he is standing mere centimeters away from Even. "Do you really mean it, baby?"

Even raises his eyebrows at him. "Do I look like a man who doesn't mean what he says, who would joke about something like that? Of course, I fucking mean it, Isak! I will go down on one knee as soon as the government will pass that goddamn law."

"Probably right there in the Parliament building…" Isak tries to mock him but it comes out rather fond and the smile on his face gets impossibly wider. "Fuck, Even."

Before he can think of anything else to say, Even steps closer and cradles his left cheek in his hand. With a sigh, Isak puts his own hand over Even's and holds it in place, his lips kissing the heel of Even's hand. "Of course," Even whispers, locking their eyes in an intense but happy stare. "You know… We should be up there by the lectern so that everyone can see and hear it."

Isak scrunches his nose at the thought. "No."

"No?" Even grins and leans forward until their noses are pressed together. "Fine, okay… I'll do it at home then, just the two of us. Sounds better?"

"Yeah… I like that…"

They smile at each other happily for a moment, then Isak leans his forehead against Even's and closes his eyes. "I can't believe we're talking about this right now… I can't believe you just promised to marry me. It's all so… It's like in the movies. I never thought that this would be my life one day."

"Well… it is. And you deserve it," Even whispers, kissing the parts of Isak's face that he can reach. "We deserve it. We've been through so much, _you_ 've been through so much."

Biting his lips, Isak tries to put into words what he feels right now, what all of this means to him, and why he never thought it would be possible. "You know… I still remember when you switched me on for the first time and how I saw your face for the first time and it meant nothing to me. I just registered you as my owner and that was that. I had no idea you would change my whole existence and my way of thinking and feeling and the way I would look at the world and humans. And there was so much shit we had to work through and yet, here we are. Despite our insecurities and against all odds, we made it here. And I've been the happiest robot for the last years, you know? But this, what you're promising right now, I never thought it would be possible. I didn't even think of it, Even. Not once. Because to me, it wasn't even a possibility. It was something for humans, something I saw in movies - but not something for me."

"But it is a possibility," Even says, his hands now on Isak's hips, pulling him in closer, against his body. "And it is going to happen. And the best thing is, that you made it a possibility. Your work is one of the reasons why it is a possibility now."

Isak smiles shyly and leans in to kiss Even with all the love and the passion that he has for this man.

When they part, Isak's eyes finally wander to the piece of paper that by now is lying on the floor because Even had to let go of it in order to hold on to his partner. "So… what exactly is that, baby?"

"Yeah, so, uhm…" Even blushes and picks up the paper with a shy smile before handing it to Isak. "It's my promise, I guess? Something to hold onto until I can propose to you rightfully and give you a ring."

With a frown, Isak takes the paper and reads what it is written there.

He reads it one time, two times, three times…

"What the fuck?" Isak looks up from the paper to stare at Even in disbelief. "You didn't do this... This is fake, right?"

"Again…" Even grins at him while Isak is losing his shit all over again. "Do I look like I would joke about stuff like that? It's really, Isak… I made a research about it months ago and then when you told me about today, I made the call. The certificate arrived two weeks ago."

Isak gasps and looks down at the certificate again. It does look official and he knows Even would never joke about stuff like that. And yet it is hard to believe for him that all of this is real and that it is his life now.

"The star with the coordinates 02h 01m 21s and +42° 21′ 06″ in the Andromeda constellation was successfully entered in the star-naming registry. This star has been named Isak Bech Næsheim," Isak reads, his voice a lot higher than usual. "The star with the coordinates 02h 42m 21s and 42° 12′ 21″ in the Perseus constellation was also successfully entered in the registry with the name Even Bech Næsheim… _What the fuck?_ "

Even moves around him and hugs him from behind before he puts his finger onto the middle of the paper, tapping on the message there. "Read it," he whispers into Isak's ear.

Isak takes a deep breath and leans against Even before he reads. "To the love of my life, the man who rescued me from the sea monster and whom I rescued right back. We'll be together forever in the northern sky."

There are teardrops falling down onto the certificate and it takes Isak a moment to realize they are his own.

He carefully puts the certificate away and turns around in Even's arms. "I love you so much, you big fat romantic sap," he whispers against his lips, not yet quite kissing him. "I can't believe you did this. I can't believe you."

Even just smiles against his lips and holds him closer. "I love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge, HUGE, thank you to all of you!!! To the people who stayed by our side from the beginning to the end, to the people who joined the ride and trusted us without knowing if this story would have a proper ending, and to the people who will maybe read it later! And just as important, thank you to Sandra for co-writing with me. I'm so happy and proud of what we did together, of the story we created but also of all the positive return we got. We started it on an impulse after watching Tarjei's short movie and I think none of us had any idea what we were getting ourselves into. For real, we only talked about our ideas for like, half an hour, and then jumped right into putting our thoughts into writting. I remember thinking, "okay, it's going to be a fun, short fic to write together". And, yeah... Look at our short fic now! But anyway, it's been such a rewarding and fulfilling experience to work with someone on such a long and detailed piece of work. I'm still amazed at how well we fit, how an idea from one of us led to another idea from the other one. I learnt a lot as a writer and I'm grateful for that. And of course, I enjoyed every Saturday's posting days, every enthusiastic reaction, the lovely interactions - on ao3 and on Twitter - with you, readers. I hope we can offer you more stories in the future, together, not together, I think it's safe to say both options are on the table. In the meantime, take care of yourself, and take care of others, too. Lots of love! ❤️ - Fau.
> 
> I'm not even sure what else I can add to this but I feel like I have to say something, as well...  
>  So, first of all, a big thank you to all of you! This has been amazing and it's also thanks to you that this story got to be what it is now. I still can't believe that we created something that is liked and appreciated by so many people. I can't believe we are the people who wrote THE robot fic. 🤭 So, thank you so much for your kudos and comments, for offering us love and support and giving is new input by analyzing the story and starting discussions about details. You're all amazing readers and we love you a whole lot.  
>  Dear Fau, I don't know why you enjoy my tears so much, but I love you even more for it, hahah. Thank you for this journey. Thank you for doing me the honors of working with you. It has been the most pleasurable experience in my writing career. You're an amazing writer with an outstanding creative mind. I know you will continue to give us great stories and I can't wait to create something with you again in the future. ❤  
>  Alright, enough with the sappy stuff. This is it guys... until next time. Alt er love, Sandra. ❤ 


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